Adult rated podcast episode with comedian Elias Zepeda aka "The Seated Entertainer" This episode is very graphic and rated R
Dreh_Talks
Only Wheels
all right and we recording my boy what's cracking bro let it go you already know hey so one much respect I appreciate you coming out here dog appreciate you so much man I really appreciate it I know it's especially on a Friday dog is it's hard and I know you man I know you being all the bitches I know you probably got a couple I know you gotta I know you probably got a couple lined up tonight you know see but you know back to back so real quick one introduce yourself to my it's my listeners oh yeah what camera yeah what we do we just we want you on the mic you know shit my name is Eli I said better aka the ceiling entertainer and K a young motherfucking semi-truck baby okay I'm a comedian actor from LA all that little bit of Long Beach a little bit of Southgate you feel me yeah yeah yeah so I think the first time I've seen you on hood stocks you know much love to that podcast much up to the homie droops lucky lucky yeah yeah yeah lucky too and and then I seen you at Lucky's birthday party in 2022 y'all you know I'm saying years performing and then she was popping and then by chance last year you know the homie Ruben G comedy yeah I want to go see him because I know his his his his girl that's my friend Shia Barber and I roll up to go see a show and there you are man oh shit yeah yeah yeah yeah so I mean so what what's new with you man bro just been staying busy man been staying busy as a motherfucker fucking getting shows you know acting now too I got a short film premiere tomorrow so yeah that short film premieres a at the at the regal LA live cinema 345 okay a short film okay okay what's it about it's okay it's part of something called the 48 hour project so what that is is filmmakers have 48 hours to get their concept to write a script and edit cut and wrap up their film okay so one of my boys cast me is in a short film so it's it's called the backyard okay and it's about like a backyard fighting ring oh okay okay yeah yeah so yeah that's I'm looking forward to that I'm looking real forward to that okay how did you come up on that I'm part of a casting agency I managed by a band from the streets to set okay so at one of these meetings my boy mentioned the project he had going on so he basically had a spotlight written for me okay so yeah it was it was a wrap that's though man so all right real quick one one if you see me looking at my phone is for ideas on questions yeah because okay so when I first started this in 2022 I had some questions it was like mainly about like entrepreneurship business success right okay and so I was asking questions to kind of like scripted and I was like finding myself like halfway through like man this is boring right and then I tried and then I've been I started recording in last year and I was kind of trying to do it Joe Rogan style which is just off the rip just off the rip conversations okay but then sometimes like it's hard to keep that some well with people that I know like it goes it goes so quick and it just goes by so fast you know but being like so I've been recording on zoom and being on zoom like it's cool because I'm at home but then I start getting tired I'm sitting on my desk at the laptop and then I'm getting sleepy you know and I have a friend her name is um Stephanie Michelle she's a comedian okay and a shadow Stephanie Michelle yeah so one day we was recording and we've we've recorded twice once in person and then once on zoom okay and that day I would originally she had told me she would have like an hour like time right so like 30 minutes into the podcast I take some pre-workout for the gym right and then she's like she's like I got more time and I'm like girl I'm sweating balls right now it's crazy yeah yeah yeah and I'm just like man I had to pee I'm sweating I'm I'm like lit I'm lit so you know so I'm you know I've been trying to work on this podcasting you know so you know we're gonna see how good chat GPT is you know we're gonna see how good this AI is because they say it's gonna take over oh that's the one that got your questions yeah we don't see we don't see what you know we don't see how good it is all right okay I was like very specific with what I asked so I was like did you tell him but ask interview questions for a undiagnosed paraplegic comedian who's been shot 12 times with you we'll almost all right all right okay so look let's take it back real quick because of one of the questions I think that it talked about was inspirations and beginnings right okay so as the world is seen right you're in a wheelchair you know and and you know I know it's got to be hard let's take it back a little bit let's take it back to like what happened as for me getting shot yeah okay well well yeah my first time getting shot it was 11 times with a four five yeah and it was at a quinceanera okay so I was 18 years old I just turned 18 well I was turning 19 pretty soon okay so my home girls invited me to this little quinceanera and me being who I was I found out exactly where it was at so I was like oh I gotta go because it was in the middle of the ops he was in the middle of the enemies neighborhood okay so I had to go I went suited and booted you know creased up size 50s 18 jersey rocking you know whole thing going yeah yeah like I said I was when I was into it I was into it you know so we pull up and my expectation is to go start game banging you know I was a fighter yeah before I got popped I was never really into gunplay unless it was like a mission or unless it was like something you had to do become saying yeah but I was always I was always a fighter you know a little boxing so when it came to that I was like okay cool like I might get jumped this time like I might actually get beat up because I wasn't getting beat up at all like dudes are trying to jump me I wasn't getting beat up okay so I went and I'm over there in the kitchen yet I like gang banging on anybody I could see okay and I was just bumping in the taggers you know so I'm like man like I don't want that anybody wanna know a tagger like I left that behind a couple years ago so as I'm doing my thing like some female that recognized me from beating up her man and she was already on the phone so she was like hey ain't you so so now I was like all day every motherfucking day and at that time I was the only person with that type of tattoo on my stomach that I had I had 18 from like bottom of my chest to like my belly button okay so she told me that and I was like I lifted it up real quick and she was still on the phone like I said so as she walks away she's like a car to hummus like Snoopy's right here right now at the kitchen boop boop boop boop boop so I'm like all right back cool like we gonna have some fucking party favors we gonna have we have a good time yeah so they put up well but effect I want to go to my home girl I was at the party and I was like hey look check it out I'm gonna get shot real quick and she was like fuck no I was like yeah man stay in here shut up so I go back to the hallway two cars pull up about eight nine dudes pull out they come into the hallway we do our little thing you know flipping fingers throwing signs and shit and me at the time I've always been like my type of disrespect wasn't really like oh yeah fuck you got those and it wasn't like that you know I'm blowing kisses at you I'm winking at you and shit like yeah it's that type of tip like I'm shooting like a woman okay yeah so so you get them out of shot myself too you know you you blow kiss at me I'm about to pop you - yeah yeah so uh I'm already like hey let's go outside and catch that fade like let's get it I guess 80 or 90 or maybe I could beat me up this time but we'll do put out a thing and he was like oh hell no like anybody fighting the day I was like oh alright now let's go let's get it so they went outside I was in the hallway for a little bit and when I went on to go outside like I didn't see nobody so when I didn't see anybody I was like man I could start disrespecting I start disrespecting cities you know dead people fucking like females from that neighborhood that I was being that I've been with okay you know so next thing I know I just hear right from the back so I got shot from behind at first I caught three from the back turned around like put my hand up chunked on my hood caught three more on the side right here caught four of my good then I caught one more falling down so as soon as as soon as I fell down like I didn't get to see who shot me I didn't get to see who shot me at all but as soon as I fell down I tried to get back up and chase the sneakers I seen going to the alley like I folded over my legs so off top it was like oh shit like they got my legs you know it wasn't like I got up in the hospital and the doctor was like hey look listen we need to talk you know when he tried to have that conversation with me I was like bro I already know doesn't my dick work and you know we need to talk about more important things don't fuck you need more important things I need one leg out of the three yeah so yeah so with that like I fell back and I was like man fuck like they got my leg I told my uncle because she came out and I was like man this innocent that I disrespecting shit I started getting my little cocky shit in the play you know I'm I got living shots at me so I'm losing blood fast the only reason the surgeon the surgeon told me after the fact the only reason I survived was because I was two blocks away from the ICU if it had been a block more it had been a rat so I passed away like two times in evidence on the way to the hospital and then in surgeries and whatnot I passed away in like three different surgeries so I told them five times yeah it took out my left kidney my appendix my spleen yeah that's it so I'm like some parts sold separately you know okay yeah I mean hey all I know from what I understand so far about you he was soldier we need to hey we need to give this book my boy right here a record deal bigger than 50 cent cuz you said 11 times you got shot nine times yep you know what I'm saying and he can still walk and talk but you know and he took like arm shots it ain't shots like through the cheek like he didn't really hit vital organs like that you know yeah and I got shot at the hole of 12 times cuz I shot again in 2019 at the music video shoot what yeah yeah are you gonna even act like that or I mean I don't know maybe you are maybe not you're not I'm you ain't never gonna catch me shit in the hood you're gonna catch me some shit like that yeah like I don't be out there paying on folks I don't want to twist my fingers up like that no more like my folks that I know like my boys that I know they're still my boys yeah of course you know but I'll be out the way they know motherfucker that's what I say yeah but at the at the music video shoot that was right before a comedy it was right before like I was already getting my mind right okay and that was a little slip up like going with the homies like that so you're with the homies yeah yeah it was it was a music video shot with the homies so okay so I actually had my first open mic scheduled for that Sunday oh shit the music video was on that Saturday so if I hadn't took my ass with the homies I would have went to the to the me fucking for the first open mic yeah but that kind of it was good though because I kind of wrapped it up yeah it was like not because I had a feeling in my gut the whole day like two times that I've that I've let down my what is it my intuition okay I've gotten something happened to me yeah every single time when it's not some heart shit some head shit it's like bam like dead center like dead center chest type shit you know and that's that's that intuition ignored it paid for it man yep that's that's crazy I mean I mean luckily you know you're here oh yeah I know we were so obviously you ain't going nowhere you know I've been in some shit and you know for I'm not from a hood yeah I used to be like a tag banger I'm okay my hood I have found myself in the middle will shoot out before not it wasn't something I was in it was I was just I was per I was purposely in the wrong place and it was the wrong time yeah and there was homies around me yeah there was some shit going down and so like you know there's you know I've gone to shit like that separate traumatic brain injury for a little minute I was in the wheelchair right and so my dad's always like man if you ain't died yet after all the stupid shit you did he's like I don't think you're going nowhere man he's like so you better get your shit right because if you're gonna be here for a long time like you're gonna get your shit right you know I feel it and so I mean man I can identify with you know part of your story just because you know it's it's we're here you know we're here hey and it's funny because right when you tell you started telling the story about the doctor in your third leg yeah I just I just seen that I just seen one of your that's the video I posted that's the case the video I posted yeah and man I bet that one goes down good with all the ladies hey but I purposely leave it open like if you watch the whole clip I never tell you if yes or no I know right now let me ask you real quick what so have you tried to honey pack it man I don't need none of that no I don't so I I'm healthy as fuck I don't need it yeah but like how I tried it curiosity kills a cat you know I don't forget let me try it yeah I kill the pussy just fine that's right yeah hey hey you know hey I mean shout out to honey pack though all way yeah say royalty honey packs they're the ones I fuck with LA iconic okay well see honey packs all day they fuck with the homie king cash and lefty now too so okay shut up okay I'm okay I'm y'all want to sponsor somebody in the wheelchair you already know man we meals on wheels all day royalty honey packs baby gold young semi-truck baby young semi-truck 18 will it that's right okay okay so you get shot you get shot again and then and then after that that was in 2019 so when does comedy start 2019 2019 was crazy how soon after that I look look in 2019 my mom passes away in January right January 19 she passes away Russian boom I've been then comes June I get shot comment I started my first open mic at the Hollywood Laugh Factory okay was October 22nd okay so it was a whole year mom passed got shot COVID popped off mm-hmm no and there we go comedy started to and COVID popped off right after I started comedy that's exactly what I'm gonna say cuz you know I listen to Joe Rogan and you always say right when COVID hit comedy stop is just it was just like in a hole you know it was in a in a sense like it slowed the fuck down it slowed down because I was still hitting underground mics like at that time when when COVID hit comedy clubs slowed down but sports bars and little holes in the wall they were like hey if y'all want to practice I'm through so that's exactly what the fuck I did did you ever do any shows in a parking lot yeah yeah yeah I did a show in a parking lot of bahas and downy what is it what is it it's a sports bar is it a sports party bar just no I just sports bar hey hold on hey hey have you heard of these Vietnamese coffee shops my book my boy written a raise I'm gonna show you something after this like I know what a massage parlor is I can get coffee is man coffee yes yes I have not been but I'll show you a couple Instagram okay after we get off that's crazy this new thing I don't know if it's just Orange County but most of them okay they got each county you know everything's been hey it's crazy because LA's the hood to me I mean I'm from you know I grew behind the park right yeah at least the hood to me right a lot but exactly Nella shout out to Nella right and so shout out to Homie's from Hyla Park right and so so I'm always thinking at least popping right but since day one okay so you know the first time I was introduced to one of those Vietnamese coffee shops where they had the gambling you do it anyway what where they had those where the gambling was Orange County Orange County okay and now the coffee shops Orange County it's like everything is always popping off in Orange County look cuz if you come down to some shit like this over here like there's some like gambling spots that are Asian at Long Beach but not everybody can go there oh yeah you know it be it be that type shit yeah when it's in LA it's usually backed by some type of organization oh we won't talk about that but you know I know exactly what you know what I'm like regardless of what demographic it is if it's black brown white you know they got white white shit too you know they got a Russian motherfuckers yeah so a lot whenever whenever something like that is down here and it involves like a sexual demeanor yeah it's usually somebody behind it oh yeah someone you know someone's paying some taxes you know I just haven't really seen those little bikini barista shit's down here where's that I like Orange County yeah so that that's it's kind of like that right but right there's a drive-through though you don't get no action wait what yeah like you order it's like fucking like tick bucks oh sorry you pull up and she's like oh here here's your cafe mocha latte and some cheat cheese and shit that's that's that's that's crazy yeah yeah these apparently you know that you walk in and back I think allegedly a legend okay okay I've been told you know I've been invited but I have not gone so shout out to honey pack shout out to honey pack yeah let's go royalty honey pack are you yeah yeah but you know saying so but yeah man uh man there's some crazy that the world man we ain't no and you know if you want to have some fun somewhere it's out there to be found okay okay you know what I'm saying but oh again real quick shout out to you dog for coming out I've been trying to catch you for a minute I know you busy I know you busy but you know I'm relentless so hey you know I like that it's weird I appreciate you coming down because recently like I just interviewed the homie on zoom recently right an MMA fighter profiter okay and there's times where like I'm trying to get like all these guests and like sometimes they don't respond and it's cool like at first I didn't I don't really get bothered but I'm like fuck like how do I like I look at people I'm like how did they get that guess or how did they get that guess you know yeah so I'm just like why I'm just gonna like try you know and sometimes like I almost landed like a really fucking big guess right and okay and then she just ghosted me I was like ah but yeah like I'm talking like she was on Joe Rogan big oh shit I yeah and she was like communicating with me back and forth and then I think what happened was she got pregnant and you know she's busy as fuck man that's usually occupied but I almost got almost kind of like you break you know but hey you just as big dog so I ain't tripping with you know I'm happy I appreciate you man so let's see let's see what we got right here let's see let's see so other than getting shot 12 times yep you know I'm resting piece of mom's right all day what inspired you to try comedy like what actually inspired it like what brought that I've always been I've always been like stupid so I've always had like a different outlook on even fucked up shit that happens to me and even before then I've always been I don't know if it's empath or I think it's empath but I've always like taking in people's emotions like if you're feeling fucked up I'm gonna feel that I come up feel the fuck out of you know so as a kid my mom was the first person that I had that interaction with she had a drug problem you know me and that me and my mom's in pop separated it when I was seven okay so I wound up with her for like most of the time for the weekdays and when pops came through every other weekend paid me up type shit you know so with that stress drugs and when I had fucked up days so when I would notice it should be all like fucked up and sad and shit I would just start doing stupid shit and I would do goofy ass dances howdy bro me 34 okay so sorry oh 37 okay okay you okay yes I you look like you 27 my boy you like fine wine though you feel real quick real quick before I forget man earlier yesterday we're talking about no did he remember that yeah yeah all ditty baby on the way over here I was gonna I just got a new cologne is called like confessions of a rebel get a room or some shit and I was gonna put some on I was like nah I don't want to seduce the homie and I'll be I'll be a motherfucker to like sense too so better watch that ass boy I just got that oh my god that's just fucking like fucking drugs in the bottle my boy like I was like god damn when a girl smells this she gonna be like I be fucking with curve curve okay curved original curve back then and I just got put on a burberry - I just recently started getting colognes again I didn't have no cuz I bought like cheap cologne for a long time and right now have that one I got Versace and then I have another Versace on the way okay I'm thinking I'm stepping on my game got to say got to go you know hey big podcast guest big colognes you know I mean big barbering big everything let's go a curve you ever want to sponsor somebody I've been rocking with since I was 16 wait 37 in the game now man that's 20 years the green bottle the green bottle with the orange classic right I don't mess with that sport I don't mess with none no disrespect curve but I go with what I know yeah let's go okay okay so okay so okay so for example when it came to know my little dancers of moms so I strange to ask this you're familiar with Street Fighter right oh yeah okay you know dr. Dalsim the yoga fire mm-hmm okay remember when he would win that stupid dance he would do like he'll clap his hands and be like side to side maybe yeah okay well I would do that in my little tanta dance in front of my arms and regardless of what type of tears she had in her face she would look up and she'll start laughing her ass off that's right and I would literally feel her sadness like go away real quick so that became like like a superpower more like a purpose of mine okay because all to elementary I got bullied I got bullied beat the fuck up all type of shit first to fifth so I knew what pain felt like right you know I was never really able to get rid of my pain I mean I thought I fed y'all to the day you know to this day it's this it still is what it is you know I rock on my pain all day I mean I'm familiar with the darkness yeah but I was so familiar with it that I didn't want y'all to be there you know I don't want the people that I knew to be in the darkness so if I was able to do some goofy or what not say something stupid say something out of pocket get your mind off of it that was amazing to do I would love to do it so once I started become a fan of comedy later on in life I was like that's what the fuck they do yeah and comedians are fucked up most like most comedians like the way we go out is we OD or we commit suicide and that's just deep dark shit you know shout out to everybody struggle a little mental illness and all that fighting that daily man yup but that becoming a fan of that and dipping back into my past was like yeah like I gotta this is something that I got to do and I actually started thinking about I can't tell you the moment that I was like I want to do it you know but there was a moment that I started watching more comedy performances there was a moment that I started become curious like very curious you know and then I would think back to like the homies in praising or different homies would be like hey tell bro about that story you told me about that time when you you you do you know so now I'm getting stories requested because they're funny right you know what I mean so like oh okay I was kind of discouraged because at the time I was like 32 when I was first thinking about this till I found a comic named Joey D is okay Joey motherfucking Coco did that's uncle Joey I ain't met him yet but that yet is in effect you feel me to have me up so he inspired me on two levels one he told like go he didn't tell me but I seen him in an interview saying that he started comedy at 32 okay so I was like bro we're there like we straight yeah and then I thought I might have been low be a little too raunchy be a little too hood be a little nasty little gutter for comedy you know just because I'm a Latino and I didn't really see too many Latinos in English they were like that right you know George Lopez has his knees sure everybody else has their thing but I never really saw like a ghetto nasty gangster motherfucker doing his thing right but then I start listening to fucking Joey D is and he has jokes about kidnapping about his mom but he finding finding his momma dead on the damn kitchen floor like he has all kinds of jokes so it's like oh we can go like we can go bro so that that's honestly Joey D is was one of my huge motivating factors okay yeah okay all right so we did yeah man I just I just heard him on a podcast that he you know something about inspiring about him I know he used to do a lot of coke yeah I think he's sober now yeah and you know I find that a lot in comedy cat with cat Williams I was just hearing right now as a matter of fact Joe Rogan talking to Adam Sandler and he was saying that there was some comedy code back in the day they would either pay you in cash or coke makes sense you know say yeah it makes sense it's crazy but I would you know they all say cold yeah hey and that's where it's going anyway and I remember there's some of cats earlier stuff not the more recent stuff my boy is sweating bullets oh yeah yeah yeah that's that must be some shit at the same time though like a lot of a lot of the black comics that are active as he was like moving around and very active in the shit yeah man they gonna get sweaty they don't get sweaty sweater that's why you always see them dudes with a rice little rag and I feel it because I was in a I wasn't like else on a performing one time my first time doing 25 minutes and by the time I got off a stage like I'm over here like oh damn I a low key I like titty sweat like I take off my jacket because I was layered up I had a little bubble jacket and a little sweater hoodie under it so once I took it off and I went home I seen a whole back shoulder part was a darker khaki than my fucking actual sweater was wow so I was like oh right under them lights and everything them lights are hot bro I bet my specialty fits a stage like a like a big stage them lights are hotter than the LAPD life bro yeah we didn't yeah I didn't see but I don't see in a couple of those you know to a two in the morning yeah Sabre Park East LA right here now matter of fact man it's that it's just wild all right so let's see what we got here creative process hold on all right so look lately I've been like I think about Sherlock I'm a thinker you know yeah I think about I don't think about death like is in dying but I constantly think about like what happens after like yeah if we remember if we're conscious yeah if my fault my fucking soul is gonna be looking down in me like are you dumb motherfucker you know I always I always ask my shit my soul shit so I'm so lately I've been asking myself like how do these fucking comics do it like do they write it all down do they memorize it do they record it do they they fucking like like how like what's your creative process okay I would say I'm a I'm a sporadic thinker okay like I'll be here with you and it's oh shit I bam damn okay right got it right down real quick and I'll just take like it'll be let's say a whole paragraph in my head and I'll write three words you know like DNA fuck midget okay and I'll remember what that paragraph was after that I get to use that work that in and then if I'm if I need more key words I'm gonna put that in there you know because I've learned if you want to write down the whole joke verbatim like word for word and it becomes a script you kind of block yourself in you don't have wiggle room crowd change audience to change you know energy changes in the room you got to be able to change with it okay so I would say that's that's my process I don't I don't sit down and write yet like I don't have us have a set time that I then I write which I need to do I feel like I'd be amazing at that because I got fucked up as ADHD right so so once I hyper focus it's crazy so if I'm able to sit down and it's like all them voices in have my little powwow like hey we all gonna do this at once like you over here you over here get off the drums you stop doing jumping jacks yeah I get all the motherfuckers in here like a line everybody up we're gonna be straight but right now I will say I'm like that like boop okay cool and it'll come to me while I'm driving while I'm in a shower like I pull over sometimes and I'll be like oh hold the fuck on I need this okay because there's been times when I'll be like half a sleep midnight and I kind of wake up a little bit I think of some shit in my head like man I gotta write this down right now go to sleep for like we're gonna rip it in the morning and I'm like of course I wake up and like ah fuck like you see stupid we should have wrote it down fucker that's right man I feel that I feel that you know you're talking about like you know like getting everybody lined up in a row yeah if I could get all my fucking little minimes lined up in the road dog my boy I'd be like fucking I don't know but I'd be fucking killing it out here like like like it wouldn't be fair to have these motherfuckers out here dog because I'll just be fucking just man I just be lining shit up left and right bro and it's crazy because like I always I see people that have their ducks in a row yeah but I'm like man yeah I do cool you know I respect it you know and you know you know I you know I break real recognize real you know yeah but I'm just like dog if I had my ducks in a row it would be on a home yeah we got different bucks you know you know it's bad you know all the experience and all the wisdom and all the bullshit all the pain all the trauma I man I've been in those dark places you know I'm in those dark places you know I'm I'm recovering all the gaddick okay okay yesterday I had twenty months twenty months over longest I've ever been over yes right one day at a time baby one day at a time dog I hate you know I don't hate I like being sober I hate that like I have to be sober cuz it's kind of fucked up and it's not fucked up it's just sometimes I'm like man like why can't I just go have a fucking drink bro like why not because one is too many thousand is never enough baby look I was at the NA meetings with my mama too so I know the 12 steps I know our father I know all that man I was a seven year old at the NA meetings so yeah and not only that but one one drinks I don't know but that drink comes with the arina you know I'm saying you know it's got to and if you know could they go hand in hand you know and that's everything just takes off from there you know are you mentioned something what I can't remember what you said but I wanted to comment on it but it's something like you know like like doing things and maybe it had to do with like doing things and you knew you shouldn't have done it or something like that I can't exactly remember but like that's how my story started like that's how my struggle started like you know I had a traumatic childhood but where it really started bad for me was in 2012 Muhammad offered me coke at the bar one time you know okay and I should I should have said no I should have said no yeah you know and I said let's go fuck it you know and I had done something I had done the same behavior at some point in high school one time which led to a little downfall right and so I should have known I should have recognized it and I didn't you know and it and that one night changed my life forever you know what I'm saying and so from that night I went to so many dark places dog that like I just when you say dark places I'm just like I know exactly what you mean you know I've never been shot but but man I'm sure there's been a time where like I was just in as much pain you know I'm saying yeah so with that have you ever have you ever bombed on stage yeah my second open mic okay how'd that go fucking horrible what happened like my first one look my first one went too good okay all right to the point where I'm like oh fuck like I got this like I got it in a bag so second one came around Hollywood last factory again and I went up like hey what's up I got this bitch like oh and what's worse it wasn't just all crickets it was all crickets plus a ha ha ha like bro I don't need that support laughter you just gave me a fucking participation trophy man you feel me so that was humbling than a motherfucker like I went out and I was like all right we got to work at this we just can't fucking come up in here and thinking it's like whatever it's like being a street fighter than hopping into the ring and thinking you bought the fuck everybody up which is what happens a lot and anime you know and I got my ass handed to me that day so yeah so do you do you test your jokes on like on your homies or your family I'll test them everywhere everywhere you go I can start books this shit yeah like for all you know I can test some shit on you tonight yeah yeah yeah yeah I'll did he all did he all did he all did he fast forward no pause baby all right all right and oh okay now next question is how do you deal with hecklers but all right now and difficult audiences but before that do you remember that fucking night when I seen you in at that at that show in with your with when Ruben was there you remember that white lady that was heckling she would not stop all the little drug brother in the back I'm latina I will make skin girls that she was so annoying oh yeah I had to get on her my boy I was like he just want some she be some dick she be seating something in her life yeah I think you know me me and the homie we were like talking to her after and like he was like shoot your shot I was like me no that's not a good friend that's not a good friend if he told you to shoot your shot that she's like that's not a good friend give me a line of coke instead of that fuck that that's crazy like wait and I think that was her fucking husband yes she was like being like Ron she but that was her husband yes yeah bro that's this is crazy she was wondering I'm like East LA getting us like those the white girls that came out of the Chicano neighborhood and she was like I grew up I'm a Mexican so I'm a Mexican already yeah they may just because you had a Mexican dick done you throw it a change your accent oh hey you want to know some crazy about that they too all right so look last year I got hit by a car on my bicycle right oh shit I got a little money from it right and not but not enough not I got enough but not enough because the one mother fucking car that hits me right shout out to the little Mexican lady who did it right in Pomona right has fucking live limited liability insurance you're gonna pay out so fun $18,000 okay I was grateful you know I got a little car out of it you know say did you have to go to the hospital oh yeah yeah real quick real quick okay okay so you have to do it stay you never stay for that oh yeah cool yeah yeah yeah for sure right so that day I think I had my lawyer had sent me like a little check like to chill with you know like a little advance right so I catch it at the bank and I have all the money on me when I go to the show right and so I have everything in my wallet right and so I'm paying for my food and I have blue faces 20s and ones I'm paying for my food yeah and the old girls you know like you know a little more than even that girl she was kind of cute little bartenders remember I don't know if you remember you're a little skinny I'm more than you know who's a bartender right yeah okay so um she tells me it's like 23 something so you know I thought I thought I put out 30 bucks right I gave it she goes are you sure oh yeah just take it don't trip yeah yeah go back home right I pull out the envelope of money and I counted I'm like wait a minute what the fuck I'm short a hundred I gave that girl a hundred dollar ten yep best tip hurt I don't know about best tip of her life but yeah hey shout out to her girl she got another tip that night she sweet too she sweet I talked to her she was cool she was cool yeah but this is at the parlor bar then is that the part of our yeah part of our yeah yeah it's at the place where they could push that wall in and you come into the back room and go back in yes yes yes yes yeah yeah so yeah that was I remember man I never yeah that's great like hey but you know what I'm gonna say like at that time I was having I was playing a lot over little too much playing scratch is too much so honestly it probably went to a better cause anyway you know I'm not kept most of that money anyways but like for all I know I would have used that on some stupid shit yeah so I probably went to a better cause you know for all I know she probably needed it you know saying and hopefully a bless her hope I hope I really hope it did but moving forward so other than that lady that night how else do you how else do you deal with with hecklers luckily enough I mean not even luckily enough cuz I want that shit I haven't really had too many I haven't really had so many I've had people that talk too much and y'all get on ahead like it turns into a roast battle after that a one a one-sided roast battle yeah yeah so I mean like I said I haven't really had too many but as soon as they get to talking they're doing a little too much yeah we get on it I mean when you think about it like a normal human being trying to heckle us at a homie that's been shot that that that that that keeps her with it you know hey and that gets all the issues like excuse my language ladies I'm sorry I'm sorry I love women I respect women he just calls y'all bitches cuz I didn't know your name directly yeah those cat Williams right there you need me to know your name let me know yeah let me tell him you know yeah yeah so so okay man I totally 80 fuck all right I got the age I got 80 HD so I was like pew pew pew pew so all right so technically I kind of I have both I have diagnosed both right but I take something to kind of like like I don't take a stimulant I've taken that all before and it works like I can sit down and do homework and study but what I take now is it just stops me from like having anxiety of not being able to pay attention but I'm still fucking all over the place like you should see me at the gym dog I'm fucking people are like what the fuck it looks like you're fucking like running around the gym like a fucking maniac I'm like dog I can't sometimes I'm okay yeah I just want to chill but a lot of the time I can't assist you it's that pre-workout - oh yeah that's that pre-workout man I'll be using no pre-workout I don't use no pre-workout at all ADHD and I get the one is my work it might be working okay yeah I just you know recently recently I'm on a tip I'm trying I'm trying to fucking take my shit to another level you know so I mean you could do without pre-workout I was just I like feeling I like feeling uncomfortable when I work out it's okay all right so look all right so look I work with this company called TC1 jail right it's a bad job okay literally fucking burns it burns your skin and makes you sweat more right mm-hmm and I fucking love it I'm obsessed with it yeah I don't like working out without it anymore okay like who the hell likes to work out fucking with their head their face all itchy their stomach burning you know I'm saying yeah I take a shit at the same time that's crazy you know I'm saying that sounds like a kink you might have unlocked bro I might have like that you know no new kink unlocked hey you know we're new level new level yeah we're gonna see about that yeah so shot hey are you sure you're not a serial killer what I tell you if I was hey let me find out you'd be working out with no headphones now I work out to R&B hey if you ever see anybody on a treadmill running with no headphones walk over I got him roll over my boy roll away you got to go mmm something's wrong with that motherfucker I might like that though what yeah I might like that I mean if she pretty you know oh oh oh yeah yeah yeah yeah crazy oh yeah you know you know you know I don't fuck I hate toxic right but I love me some toxic yeah I like a little bit like if you ain't calling me fucking being toxic I'm like you don't even like me yeah yeah like me like who's that yeah man don't be tripping but ask me again yeah even though yeah I like that shit like just fucking slap me once I real quick for talking to that bitch you know you don't put your hands on me unless you plan on getting dick down cuz now uh-huh yeah yeah man so I feel that man I feel that let's see what we got next let's see what we got next uh okay so what's your most memorable memory and comedy so far shit I did I did a show with Willie Barre Center okay shout out to the OG Willie Barre Center okay yeah opened up for him and it was a crowd of a thousand okay at the Riverside was it the Riverside Performance Arena okay it was a whole big-ass arena big-ass stage biggest stage I ever been on and like this just a fuck from beginning to end crowd was fired whole fucking stage my front entrance okay it was just popping rose it was cool okay it was cool is fuck yeah also you get excited in front of big crowds yeah I mean what can I say it's a challenge you know yeah you're a performer then yeah they you're not and you're not everybody can be all up in the lights you know yeah that takes another type of individual you know that's some B shit right there and the top it off like when I got off stage the next comic that came up he was like you fucking asshole so I was like what you killed it that much so now I was like I got to follow that like I gotta keep your energy up so I was like oh hell yeah like that wasn't shit cuz he's already doing his thug there's well you know okay okay yeah so that was like what just back out real quick dang yeah okay all right and so now okay so now what's the homies name we were talking about oh Joey Diaz other than Joey Diaz right who else is there anybody else in comedy you look up to Bernie Mac Eddie Griffin pretty max dead right yeah yeah he passed away Western piece yeah but just the way he tells stories yeah the way he's told stories Eddie Griffin on his look cuz he be having that woke shit at the same time it's though it's still brown she is fuck Richard Pryor right Robin Williams in a motherfucker yeah because that man like he was so upbeat he's so energetic but he's so hurt inside now you could tell if like once you know once you get old enough to know you see it yeah like as a kid you don't see it yeah as a kid we can identify adult darkness really right unless we've been a victim of I'm an adult with that darkness because we know how to see it coming right you know saying but with him it was like damn bro how can you do so fucking much then after seeing the light it's like oh shit like I got you mmm like I got you bro that's why you want to be so many different people because being you hurts damn yeah I was deep yeah my boy you might need to take up some poetry to yeah I do that to do you yeah I report you to yeah yeah that's all that was my first love that was my first uh my first outlet I when I was when I was like I don't know 14, 15, 16 I tried rapping I can't rap for shit but I could write some panty dropping love poems that's right all day every day literally like like I there was like a time from like 2017 at like 2020 where like I was writing multiple poems a day like I got poems for days yeah you know publish bro publish machine I have like three on a website but I think one day maybe I'll get all my shit when I get my ducks in a row when I get this stuff that duck this took you know I'm saying when I get my ducks in a row and I have some more focus probably like I know something that said that they published a book on Amazon using I don't know it was like really easy to do it I'm sure that hey this AI should I'm sure this AI should tell me how to do it yeah yeah like I was doing research recently and I think like minimum for a good poetry book minimum is a hundred poems a hundred poems yeah yeah got those in a stock already man I could man I can make a girl fall in love at least 250 way right now that's right that's right right now I do and and for all the for all the people they know me they're like well then what's going on with you right now I'm just I'm creeping I'm chilling you know don't mean I'm doing me focus I'm being a dad I'm being a dad but yeah yeah yeah so let's see let's see what we got next let's see what we got next so you're influenced your influence your style right you're you say you know you're raunchy hooded gangster with it right so real that's all real so it's all inspired by just you yeah right yeah just you all you right I'm a dirt bag I'm a you know I'm afraid I'm you know all that like hey you know at the same time like there's certain certain like material you'll see this like oh shit that's heartfelt you know I mean it still it has to have a touch of darkness because that's where the heart feels at yeah also yeah there's still a lot of shit that's like I got a spectrum of it okay I got a spectrum of shit okay happy go lucky darkest fuck you know just nasty booty hole licking ass motherfucker yeah we go all around I think I remember on a lucky's birthday you were getting pretty raunchy yeah yeah yeah yeah the homie was was fucking treating me the shots too so it was just right there like it was like oh yeah we good the homie danger okay okay all right that's what's up man all right let's see okay so next one was how's your life how's your personal life influence your comedy well we know that one right yeah yeah you have any like hood jokes like what would you consider a hood joke like like any stories like that happened like like in the hood like with the hungry whoa yeah like uh there was there was one time that it was raining okay and uh we they packed somebody out the homies was packing somebody out okay and I was like man fuck that hold on move so I pulled up and I fucking got my leg and yeah yeah so the dude on the floor looks up and it's like the fuck like you hear what the fuck and so it's like yeah you I know you're gonna go back and tell your boy he's like like man I just you ain't gonna believe this shit like I just got stomped out by my fucking can't stop like the fuck and it topped it off like I said it was raining so I don't know if you ever heard somebody get jumped in the rain it's a lot of it's a lot of squishy shit okay so in a in a fucking serious scenario like this people getting stomped out somebody's life in danger you just ain't so it was like oh come on now yeah yeah yeah I never heard anybody jumped in the rain but I have heard people getting jumped with the bunks getting moved up up on the top tier oh yeah yeah move the bus to the front go to the back yeah you know over and over hey we're rearranging hold on we're ranging the fuck we're not we're not in the back bro we're up in the back oh spring cleaning spring cleaning yeah damn that's okay first of all getting packed out sucks right depends on how you look at it bro because if you know you're gonna make it out of it like you know this is all physical that I ain't gonna get stabbed I ain't gonna get shot it's fun it was it was fun it was fun I mean not even glorified shit it was fun I mean so 2021 I got jumped by two foot from a hood I won't say who but they pulled me out of a spot and they pull me from behind I had no notice and they just start you know they start I think one of them had a fucking bad or a stick I don't know what happened and so I mean I used to fight but at that moment right that's why I used to fight MMA right okay I still train I still train I'm gonna MMA referee judge inspector it oh shit yeah I still working calm I working combat sports right and so I'm around just all the time right so but at that time I was drinking up to no good right so probably had me in probably had a slap you know the same yeah yeah so my body was not in a good place right and so I think like instinctively like I just I covered up like I would like in a fight you know yeah and so my nose was bleeding but like that was about it but there was no for me there was no like oh fuck am I gonna make it out of this it was more like all right I'm just gonna call myself let me get through this yeah yeah but but not in the rain um I just want to actually it might have been raining earlier today mm but that's got a suck being packed out in the rain dog like like man you know I mean if you out gang banging in the rain you go something go ahead hey and shout out to the homies for making sure I got a little piece because they're because I wasn't always looking like hey hey you get him and he was like get your ass over here and get some of this like all right oh gosh thank you I just saved me a slice okay that's a a and yeah and shout out to that fool cuz you know he told nobody you think you told somebody hell yeah you better have I would have I would have brought like what let's go back no no no let's not go back one of them fuckers in the wheelchair we ain't going back nowhere right now I'm not seeing him ever again I'm staying around stairs the rest of my life so I cannot see him fuck that fuck him we'll figure traumatized now yeah yeah right you probably don't like nobody probably slashes all the wheelchair handicap parking signs he sees she's he's he's hating right now dog yeah that shit's funny imagine he ends up being a heckler a one of your home when you're showing up yep yep you stop me squishy feet I'll know exactly hey I'll know exactly who the fuck that as soon as that happens I'll buy that motherfucker a drink bro because now we over here at a comedy show performing at a comedy show we done made it bro yeah yeah yeah so I've been jumped in the rain but 2019 I was kicking up the high now East LA right around here okay it's raining kind of right and we're walking up to no good and uh I fucking slipped in the rain okay was it one of those huh you fell on your back slips or did you fall forward I fell on my back ah in the mud in the mud oh shit I in the mud bro okay now total bad look for me not a good look at all mm-hmm luckily the homie got me uber to get out of there but man I was embarrassing yeah I bet you know what you know how many times I've done some embarrassing shit in front of high notes like stupid shit I'm like oh shit I either have the worst luck or oh no man cuz I did some embarrassing shit I mean who knows that was part of the universe saving you from that female because you know who knows who she was or where y'all would have wound up she could have probably shot you in a long run I know well I we we kicked him many times after that I know her you know she she's she probably still around here shit but he's probably still around here dog you know when and I've been in I will say maybe it was because I have been in some bad places because of her thanks to her mm-hmm and I think you know recently uh we was like we was like talking and she on some weird shit now so you know you know dope does a lot of I'll get boom yeah I don't want to tell the story cuz I don't want to put oh man it sounds like you got to tell the story you know all right so take this out all right there's this girl right yeah so I've cut left the gun blade like two times I've cut she thought I'm not like two times right and then mostly I cut you know I'll be shaving the home his head from OTR soulless soulless and so he's he owns OTR right and so because of those four videos with lefty and she thought on us right I've gotten a lot of views and and some followers right and so like I've had a decent amount of girls you know decent looking girls follow me right because of it you know and so there was this is one girl who started DMing me and we're chopping it up and she tells me she lives in Arizona and she seems good looking you know she's like 21 22 years old maybe 23 right and I'm like okay so she's just I'm not like hitting on her but she you know she's an attractive girl yeah you know DMing me about music and saying that she writes music and she's like put me in like tap me in with lefty gunplay yeah hold on you know how many times I've had people ask me to tie me in with lefty gunplay I bet I bet you how right now shot I left the gun like let's shout out to him right I've cut his hair two times I'll just see like yeah have I'm yes I know him right yeah I'm gonna just fucking manage your dog like fuck right and so okay so she's like all right so like she's like you know tell me and I'm like yeah you know what's up you know and so we we stop talking we start reconnecting talking and she and then one day she's telling me like all her life problems and then she's telling me I'm coming to California I'm like okay all right you know she's like scoop me up I want to you know I want to go with 20 or podcast recordings she's like you know scoop me up I'll be in Riverside right and I don't screw bro bright and the other day I'm just like I'm like I'm what happened to her right because she was just in California and I'm like is she okay so I caught her I'm like hey what's up are you good she like yeah she I caught her on FaceTime and she's like yeah I'm fucking in Arizona I need it she's like can you give me Uber to where you are I'm like bitch she's like she's like I'm in Kingsman Arizona I'm like what I'm like what she really asked me for Uber to California from Arizona right is that even possible for like 20 racks maybe oh no so so I'm like she's like oh they fucking took my money they took my shit and she's like going off and I'm like oh shit I'm like oh no what's going on here right and so then I'm like I'll get you Uber like maybe a couple miles away if you're in danger right so I'm about to I'm starting to order her the uber she had sent me the wrong address so I canceled that shit I'm about to order a new one and I'm like and then she's like talking to surrounding food right and and she's like walking with the FaceTime and she points it down and she's walking with once you and I'm like oh no oh no I'm like oh no it's like this white man I know he's why I could tell he's white he's like oh where you going she's like I'm headed to so-and-so I got a truck she's like can I get a ride when he's like yeah you're right she has a dog with her you know oh yeah she working okay so yeah so I just looked at her story on Instagram like today and she like laid out at a pool in a bikini and I'm like who fucking boys I'm like oh oh she wifed up now already it is she wifed up or she worked she she booked up but when I seen her walking with one shoe mm-hmm I said Dre what what you don't get yourself into when she asked you to Uber her cross this what the what you mean you done passed by three red flags to get to that one hold on look if she out of state and she got any type of issues like that going on I don't know who you are I don't know who you is you ain't part of my family you ain't got none of my kids and let's go you know I was like you know what like with one shoe I was like I'll help you out you know but then I see the one sure I said oh no what kind of shoe was it was it a sneaker or was it a little slip on it was a slip off it probably was a step on I don't know but I'm like this fucking girls walking with one shoe and I'm like what hey you know what I'm gonna say this real quick right I didn't been on the scene I've I don't been in the streets I didn't mean to the to the gambling spots I've been everywhere right and you know what's really fucked up to me dog I've seen a lot of homeless people all right obviously homelessness is fucked up period right but it's fucking heartbreaking when I see a young beautiful woman homeless and and out in the streets dog like like we're nowhere to go that's just I mean my boy be like but it's smart it's just because like you know I'm just like what the fuck are these young fucking women doing out here yeah like what the fuck is going on yeah like and then part of me is like girl you pretty and you young like go to work go work go get some money yeah there's a sucker out there that'll give you some money right now a dope is a motherfucker bro it not dope is a motherfucker it is especially now shit it's always been mother we just got different type of dope now but now we got a fan no we got all that shit cracking off you know that that whole thing fucked me up to dog because there was a point where like the homies they wouldn't fuck with it know yeah there was a certain point where the homies weren't fuck or certain homies weren't fucking doing meth yeah right like with certain squad that I fucked around with it was like no go bro like negative but even like like send like people sending it over here from from you know from the other side they wouldn't do it yeah but now they're doing it and I'm like hey but the with a funny fucked up thing is if you were homie and you get cut doing it and you fucking up against get packed out even though you got it from the homie yeah you get packed out yeah you know just like with you know unless you buy a shit load of it then it noticing that essay it's not in their best interest to pack you all oh yeah yeah yeah because if you're in the infirmary you can't buy more dope you know I'm saying anything more money more problems more money more problems man back to captain say well I'm gonna say my boy put up was like I'll save you you know and all right so look does I'm I've been a piece of shit in my life I'm not perfect you know I'm a dick I could be a asshole you know you are what you eat bro yeah you know I'm saying I'll pussy as my fucking up goddamn but but I have a good heart I have a big heart right and so like helping this fucking girl like right like I'm not gonna get no no pussy out of it yeah I'm gonna get nothing out of it right but I was like fuck you know for whatever reason this fucking divine intervention in my fucking heart of my soul and my brain is like save that hope yeah shout out to my mom I love you mom but she has told me in the past son you are not captain save a girl she has told me you do not need to be trying to save girls yeah she's she's like you have a tracker track record of trying to save girls that don't need to be saved and don't want to be saved oh shit okay this is priors this is your mo I have some priors yeah I know we're getting to it deep the deep roots of things yeah you the therapist now yeah I don't know how that change I don't flip the script on your ass now yeah but you know what I'm saying yeah but man you know it's funny because in that moment like earlier to earlier today I was like what the fuck I was like oh fuck like I'll help this girl and then now I'm like what the fuck is wrong what you drink yeah you know yeah you know matter of fact like three months ago I'm working out I'm working out of the gym on a Sunday right and I get a call and it's some food speaking Spanish and he's like hey wait he's on who's this it's great hey your friend right here just got into an accident and she said to call you because she trusts you motherfucker and I'm like what the fuck and I hear some girls speaking Spanish and at the time I had a friend that spoke Spanish that we were texting back and forth like regularly right yeah and so I'm like oh fuck like what the fuck and he's like she she just crashed it I just crashing in her but I got drugs and I'm from Mexico and he's like motherfucker like we gonna handle this like don't call you gonna come get her we can't come and I'm like wait what the fuck so all this crazy shit's going on right and I'm like about I'm fucking on the treadmill I'll get off the fucking treadmill I start running to my car I'm gonna go pick this girl up wherever she's at right yeah you don't even know who it is yet or you have an idea kinder well my baby mom was at home on my son okay so it ain't hurt right and so I'm like wait a minute who the fuck and I'm like what the fuck it's all night hold up so I text oh girl I'm like wait where you at she's at home I'm like fuck you for you almost got me now you almost got me almost got me bro he was just doing a gamble real quick he was getting in game like let's see he almost fucking got me it was crazy is my friend that spoke Spanish she sounded exactly like the fucking girl on the phone yeah but they're saying that they're doing that she way out now dog so yeah there's a gang shit I got I got a call like a couple years ago and I was like are you the man tengo meido tengo meido no said on the story and I was like oh get pass off you know but for sure and in the in el carro I'm like Ken it's to him Pedro can't tell you what no sec it's a sin though bitch you gonna die but fuck get out of here I am not I'm part of call me Bennett cuz I ain't in it and you ain't got no cake I'm like the other Superman after the horse I got wheels I don't got the caper that's right yeah I'm like the other guy I'm at the guy in the chair I ain't flying yo ass bitch fuck damn man that shit that we just went off the rail but it's cool I like that I like that man now the whole world knows I'm a dirtbag and the captain say yeah now your DMS gonna get blown he know lefty gunplay she thought Ramas and he's a captain save a whole tree something so what can we play Dre what you say Dre I'm trying to stay dray you know yeah I remember you know what I remember one time the home girl I was about to go a strip club right she was like why don't you come kick you with me I go all right she goes let's go to the casino like okay right okay she goes hey uh you know when we get to casino do you think you can sponsor me I'm like what oh well she's that word - yeah oh she good okay all right let's see what's up well let me tell you dog I can't say too much but it wasn't a casino I mean it was but it wasn't oh yeah oh yeah yeah yeah yeah okay I'm like what I'm like wait this is a casino well tell me how I ended up get stuck there for a couple days oh oh no I know exactly the type of place you were at got my ass yeah she knew that she was gonna spend some money on some hoes that weren't her so she was like he got money let's go let's go yeah and she said sponsor to but that bit you either watched casino the movie or she a worker and let me tell you neither one of us have with no money so you know saying man at it you know I have so many stories for fuck it I correct I could write a fucking book yeah hey you know I've been I'm not a comedian and I try my hand at a lot a lot of things I'm one of those guys like I just want to see if I could do different things right yeah I feel you so lately I have been like maybe I should try like a two-minute open mic one day you know I'm saying you just fucking shoot some shit talking about some fucking traumatic shit some funny shit what I'm saying yeah one of these I just might do it there's a lot who needs to lay is there there's a lot there's a lot of mics I'm not gonna try I'll be I'll be needs to lay yeah I'll be in East LA doing my thing but it's number love cuz you know it's the energy you carry bro I know I ain't out here trying to disrespect nobody I don't know of course so like I met OGs I've seen now look the people I try stay away from is the young young young those are the ones because they miss ones that don't give a fuck yeah you know unless you know somebody that they know they've heard of you they're like oh you cool you cool other than that I don't they don't do before yeah they really don't so you got to stay away from stupid people as stupid places in stupid times yep well right now we're in stupid times out right now the world is fuck well right now it's 6 30 yeah still brought daylight in the studio so we go yeah yeah true true true you know put you at 1 a.m. at a gas station on Crenshaw and Adams what are you doing out there you are the stupid place at a stupid time and right now you the stupid people I said I used to live off of Arlington and Adams I'm right by the yeah yeah I still right there I used to work at a barbershop I'm Vermont and what why she's in Vermont oh no shit okay evolution barbershop shout out to Hyrule evolution barbershop a piece was cracking when I man when I let man yeah yeah I get my hair cut in downy at white rabbit shave parlor what up Danny boy okay okay yeah I don't be getting my hair cut in that layman why why barbershop get shot yeah barbershop barbershop be some hood shit yeah sometimes yeah I stay all I'm out the way yeah I felt I felt that bro you know I uh yeah I felt that yeah you know yeah man yeah that was suck dog in the haircut and you shot at man yeah hey do you know my dear bro that's my dear barbershop right so so for those who don't know I'm sure everybody knows I'm a licensed barber right one day I'm on the business right hopefully part of it's a barbershop right yeah but my idea my vision right is to have a barbershop in a city where there's like a lot of partying and it's cracking right late at night right okay this barbershop's open like 6 p.m. to like two a.m. you know I'm saying right and uh there's beautiful women yeah shampooing your hair okay giving you a drink you know and there might be some rooms in the back I don't know the clothes bikini you know pasties I do vision because if it's not to exploit them but if they would like to wear bikini yeah why not I mean some people exploit themselves all the time yeah you know same and so like if if there was if I could come down with the concept like that right we're gonna drink shampoo from beautiful men in bikini right yeah and and a and a and a and a great haircut you know and and you get to just see whatever it is like something got me in Vegas yeah yeah yeah I made night yeah titties alcohol yeah open at six you right off the strip bro you know have you heard of Carafade I was just about to bring that up like have you heard about these little chicks they be fucking being on you like they'll straddle you and cut your hair so that's Carafades okay okay I've seen a couple more now I'm trying to jock her shit but yeah it's a yeah I believe she can do it to Vegas as a matter of fact and someone was saying they think they shimbo drew over there so she could just have like a full on brothel yeah probably tricking out there too yeah I mean hey I mean uh not to incriminate myself but you can do something like that over there too which means hey yeah but the fun is a lot more every massage part of down the street I'm not in those circles so I don't know but I would think in Vegas you're less likely to get kidnapped or strung up like over here like the pimps and oh like fig she ain't doing that on fig oh no she ain't doing that she ain't cutting nobody's hair like that on fig mm-hmm yeah no that's sure you go bye-bye yeah but yeah shout out to Carafade you know okay for my barber but I'll let your boy once on hey hey you know I won't be a point at this shot to stand like I has a camera I took it down I took it down I was gonna record the whole thing and put it live but I'll tell you the questions I was supposed to see I'd be fucking up dog my beauty earlier on the way to the gym at six in the morning right I'm like all right when I get to work I'm gonna print out these questions I'm gonna put the I'm gonna put the tripod up I'm gonna put the phone on the tripod I'm a stream live on stream yard and and YouTube and we're gonna be lit and then on the way over here I'm like oh fuck I'm like uh forgot the printer forgot the paper and I'm like okay so I'm like damn I'm just gonna record a little bit in the beginning and then we just have to fly with the question and I'll be fucking up my IDB see I'll be forgetting shit I'll be like people and people see it too they'll be like couldn't hear I'll be teaching my students and they'd be like so I'm gonna instruct at a barber college and I go here okay and I work in combat sports you know so I do it man I do it a jack of all trades I try to do it all yeah master now which kid hey hey so asshole a better than being a master of one so asshole told me that she was like you a jack or a jack of all trades master none I was like whoa whoa whoa whoa but did she finish this did she finish the quote I don't think she's because if she had it would have still been it would have said but that's still better than being a master of none you know no a master of one yeah yeah yeah you know saying cuz you got so many trades you might not be a master at them yet but you have all these trades and all you know is one thing yeah I just had a thought so before a comedy right when you were just banged out right what was it that you were really fucking good at that you could that could have made you a lot of fucking money fighting fighting lifting weights lifting weights dancing you still lift weights no yeah yeah but I mean like prefer like I could have competed I could still compete okay but uh but shit like bodybuilding okay I was in a bodybuilding oh shit where you yeah okay I didn't I didn't get professional but I was on my way to you okay doing that I was situation that uh dancing okay like I was doing kind of like little strip shit here in there a little bit like I shouldn't have because I was like 17 what's that place called um Trippinilles like that yeah but houses oh like sort of sort of be like you know like they'll know I could dance basically just because I go to the club or whatever and they'll be like on my tea ideas or like my home girl this and I'll go do my thing oh so you're getting paid to rub up on them yeah kind of thing okay boy okay boy she okay okay so you were hey you really are a jack of all trades a little bit yeah I'm saying okay and you master in one at multiples my boy okay okay okay man all right okay so fuck oh hey I've been meaning to tell you that shirt is hilarious I was like what you mean two-seater I said oh yeah oh yeah yeah oh yeah so you got two seats yep yep yep hey let me ask all right I ain't been blessed like that yeah but have you had the the pleasure of using the two-seater yeah how about have somebody set on my face no no no no no same time both seats at the same time oh no ah no me not not that one I ain't not yet like I'm hmm mm-hmm okay no not yet not yet I've had the three situation but not that I've had neither yeah okay neither okay neither I don't know I guess you know I guess divine intervention says you and ready for that so yeah yeah or you won't come too fast so we ain't gonna bless that shit oh hey that a bitch right what was that like okay so like it's a man right we grow men right yeah and like okay so when I was younger I was like I get older I'm gonna last long right yeah it don't work well it's for me if I don't use it regularly it don't work like that right now now if the girls unattractive I'm gonna last a long time yeah well if the girls bomb my boy I'm sorry I'm sorry baby like I'm sorry like but I'm gonna make you come first though yeah yeah I'll make you come first then you're gonna trip about you know and then and then we could go again if you really hot we're going again yeah yeah but if you ugly if you ugly one time one and that's it I guess I kind of had a cheat code role because I jacked off way before I was fucking like I started jacking up at like nine years old she didn't help me so I'm here before kind of me what yeah what yeah bro cuz then I mean like when I would do it it'll be ferociously I wouldn't make love to my shit it's let's go let's get it done oh okay saw me nobody's gonna be able to fuck at the fucking at the speed that your hand can go on your own dick you know okay you don't hurt yourself so it's like beyond that is and and I know the little trick you got to hit one before you go kick one you know you got to hit it before you go kick yeah you can't just have yourself ready after all the talk all the dirty talk all the dirty texting you're just all pressured up no man you got you got a release of pressure before you go on dresser yeah yeah so yeah I mean well I kind of had the opposite problem at times like like I'll be I'll be faded and I won't be able to not like it'll be already fucking like two two and a half hours in what yeah and it's already like her shit's red or so fucking you know must be nice hey one thing about drinking and using a doing dope right yeah that fucked my life up that I'm so upset about is that it low it didn't ruin the sexual experience for me but like you know drinking on you could last for fucking an hour two hours right yeah and like in my mind I'm like dog I'm never gonna be able to do this over never like never like and I'm like motherfucker like look it's fucked up because they say to last longer you got a concentrate on different things but it's like I'm here to concentrate on this like I'm here to enjoy it so the last longer I got a lesson my enjoyment yeah and all that's like it's it's contradictory but if you in there to get good ratings if you want a five star rating from the female you're gonna have to start thinking about your grandma but then old girls gonna see it like if she if old girl is smart oh yes she's like attractive as fuck and she's smart and she connected to you mm-hmm hey my fuck what the fuck are you doing yeah you're not here right now yeah yep that is that quote you're not here right now like where the fuck are you and you know as much ADD as I have I think I do okay and concentrating in that section right yeah right yeah but but I'm gonna say dog I say that but I'm I'm also lying because when it cut how many times and I'm gonna have to put this is not rated for children on on as soon as you put me on the on the mother fucking thumbnail this is not rated for children this will be the first one for sure but you want to fuck my life go ahead yeah go ahead how many times have you fucked a girl mm-hmm and thought about another girl to help you not once once yeah and I remember it was one of my first it was my first time my early times okay I pictured a whole different person yeah because I just wasn't feeling it hey I've been guilty that so many times but I like go way back like to like my first serious relationship oh damn okay you went into your heart yeah send them off boy like oh shit now I was just like man let me think about somebody cuter yeah cuz it was dark it was dark and I was like I know how you look in the light your facial structure could probably look like hold on okay cool there she goes and we good you know what's crazy dog I'm thirty four years old and I'm sure it's not maybe it's maybe it's I'm Chris normal but I also think for 34 year old like that's not a not a warning sign but I just had a way to dream like fucking like like three weeks ago that's healthy yeah I know but like I was like goddamn like and it's crazy cuz it's a girl that I've never been with it's a girl I know I've never been with oh somehow but somehow oh my mind constructed her full body naked yeah yeah it be like that so I'm like either this is the future or I have extra vision yeah like yeah so I might just be a fucking superhero or you might just be delusional and that's always a third option hey my boy my boy like that's always a third option bro the Lulu is real today hey that was it was a good scene though I was like I bet I bet I got damn yeah I think I've only had like those type of dreams with either celebrities or or people have already interacted with like that I've already got down if you okay so if you could make a point with the celebrity right now who would it be you gotta do me like that okay Sydney Sweeney or what's her name from from hands of stone have you seen a hands of stone no washer he's away he plays a shroyd sugar sugar rail inter okay I forgot her name but she's like Columbian Amada something something like that okay but when I was younger Rosin and Sanchez used to be my crush than a motherfucker okay yeah so both of them at the same time or we could go either way we can go either way okay okay so we on some yachts right now right now it's usually like that there's a section in here just for that it has curtains you can't go back there neon lights and everything hey every time a girl's like oh guys the same I'm like no we're not oh yeah we are hell not no man no I always say no the fuck we got I got I got ideas to me I got ideas okay okay like I'm a feminist that heart when it comes to that you know saying like I that's the man women get taken care of yeah you know we gotta treat them right though hey all bullshit aside I said to be word like once or twice today but I love women dog we wouldn't even fucking be here if it wasn't for women you know boys women make the work around and we man do we love them and that man but do they drive us crazy in the best way though yeah in the best way yeah they motivate me and distract the fuck out of me to you know that's probably a female me in here somewhere amongst all the ducks amongst all the voices you think there has to be a female me bro because there's a spider-man me there's everything me in here man what hey hey yeah I I for that dog but like for the you know you said it's Spider-Man you there's a Batman me you know and I'm just like yup I'm Batman hey I got my Batman tattoo recently okay yup okay I'll hear telling jokes with old folks you feel me folks is gone my folks is gone a little bit of Joker okay okay hey you gonna see that new movie oh yeah yeah yeah with Joaquin Phoenix right looks pretty fucking dark yeah I have to bro because the first one was amazing was a whole different take on Joker yeah don't the thing that that kind of deterred me a little bit was a fact that fucking lady Gaga is gonna be gonna be Harley Quinn is that who that is yeah but at the same time I was like you know oh Margot Robbie's another one Margot Robbie is another one yeah she's bad but that's my Harley Quinn from the cartoon you know the hey mr. J yeah that type of shit so I can see where they got a steer to a whole different direction because we're getting dark that will fit here okay so yeah like I see I see lady Gaga ain't a American American horror stories okay is that a show or yeah it's a series okay all right so she played a few different like evil characters in that so I fuck with a range they show her naked no fuck she does that in her own role what do you mean what she shows up where well fuck are you out of look up his pilot like Lady Gaga nude oh okay because she made what yeah she be free she be free to the motherfucker what yeah I mean I'm a new this that hard man it's just he's fucking laws to keep them up for the plane ah man let me get my own spot I'm swinging everywhere swing just like on zoom shit whenever I've been on a zoom call a zoom meeting a zoom show just so you know my dick was out like I had a shirt on and I was nicely dressed from the waist up okay from the waist down knock it off yeah I heard that during COVID they seen a lot more fuckers on zoom calls like there was a lot of like businessman being fired because they were like playing with that shit or they were doing some shit or like some shit oh shit okay yeah I wasn't doing that there I said my boy on zoom calls like CEO meetings and shit they thought the fucking camera was off yeah they thought it was muted and all you heard what hey check this out so I had a client who I had a barbershop client who got LAPD right and he was like April he was like one of the last times I had seen him he was like he was like these two co-workers got caught fucking in the fucking hey in the parking lot and I was like what you mean he goes you know we're having an employee barbecue and we was all chilling and you know fucking next thing you know homeboy homeboys in his blues or in his in his suit and home girls she's off he's on oh he's just cops I forgot he's yes yes and so that some I guess this motherfucker left his radio on yeah and he's bone in there and everybody fucking here's violet your mother fucking rights you have the right to remain bent over then and then I don't know if it's on the radio or the or the body cam there was another guy who goes and he's taking his shit and he's taking his shit and all of a sudden he starts playing with himself and it's all fucking record my boy oh damn all right so that's it I don't know because you got something coming out your butt that's in a phallic form and you which is that's a little suspect yeah that's a little funny I mean ain't nothing going in your ass but something's coming out your anus and yeah that's a flag on the plate yeah yeah yeah and then you see you was here about that fool um the fool from LAPD like they got fired he was a cop okay usually from L.a.p. lucky had this fool and I had asked him about it yeah like he had this fool he was a coroner he was an LAPD coroner he had him on and I had asked him what I called in I asked him about it so what what the what the cop told me was what the client told me was yeah I was just growing downtown she got she got she she they found her dead in her fucking room or some shit right and so I guess the parents didn't believe that she died of like overdose of drugs right parents didn't believe it right they didn't believe it and so they went back I don't know they checked the camera they checked the cops body camera some shit yeah and I guess he didn't realize that it had been on recording and this mother fucking when he found her dead takes off her fucking top and he's fucking playing where shit that's crazy I'm a fuck got fired I'm gonna fuck that's mother shit that's mother shit bro damn like I'll be yeah I got my little kinks but I'm no naked fillet that I actually just heard that's weird another story where the southern mother fucker this other corner he is there's like a dead body somewhere and there's an investigation right and it's close shops close for the night right yeah for some reason this other investigator goes back and he's like coming into the crime scene and there's another corner and he's fucking sweating he's fucking like sweating bullets like he's like out of breath and and like old girls right there in there like he's like what the fuck you doing is I owe nothing I was um fucking yeah no response yeah that's another one is crazy look I've done some money actually mine yachts - all right there's one thing I've done that I'm that why I didn't do it I tried to do it but it didn't work out I'm not proud of myself for it right look this girl I love I love this girl right I love this girl right okay we was partying oh I was in the eight she was you know she passed out and so I was like trying to wake her up I was trying to wake her up I was trying to wake her up you should wake up and so I want I really want to but she never woke up so I just I didn't do nothing I could okay you have worried right now I was like where is this story fucking going I could it but I was like I keep trying to wake her up like I was like come on please like I feel bad because I kept trying to wake her up like I was like shaking her yeah I'm like girl wake the fuck up yeah you would not wake up man I try to like beat my shit real quick well pick a true return I got it and I was like man but yeah that just reminded me of that but that's the darkest out you know that's the dark you know yeah I have to beat it out next to girl while she asleep you know yeah and sounds fucked up if you didn't if you wouldn't have said the story prior to this right now if you just had a nora was like hey I jacked up next to girl I sure was asleep like oh moving Delta Delta moving like whoa hey what the fuck hey man you know no man crazy what would have been funny if she'd have woke up midway hey what the fuck that's with the foot the fuck what are you doing oh like baby you didn't come to the barbecue this one had to eat that's funny are you ready are you ready for dinner oh man hey real quick what are you we'll have to cover a little bit what do you think I was going with I don't want to get into politics but like what do you think about what's going on right now man it's a circus it's just more obvious now it's more obvious now yeah that's it we like yeah at a certain point in time when I was a kid president still seem like they were presidents and now it's just entertainment like it looks like we're living in a reality show basically as people say it looks like we're living like in a fucking simulation you know yeah like someone's fucking pulling strings the creators are just becoming lazy now laughing at us if we like we were probably always in a simulation except now they're just like yeah they're fucking stupid enough let's have some fun let them do their own show right I mean we just had a fucking Joe Biden's ass who can't even talk who can't formulate a sentence who mixes up names he's barely functional and then we got a rich reality star mm-hmm that goes to show you yeah man it's a circus you know I get yeah you know you know what's crazy losing I can't touch like okay not that one not that one I fucking hate Biden he's a fucking dog you know it's fucked up you remind you my grandfather he talks like my grandfather oh that's why he don't like him and my grandfather no I love my grandfather okay okay my you know he's my grandfather has been sick before he said strokes right and so if Joe Biden reminds me of a grandfather the way he talks and my grandfather said strokes and what the fuck does that tell me about Joe Biden he don't have some strokes he shits his pants yeah different strokes yeah different strokes in a muffin I'm saying and like this was just like I don't know and like regardless of if I'm left or right which I'm in the middle just like most people you know I just want to live right I just want to live right I want to make money yeah I want to be happy that's all I fucking want it's just our division broke all the extra shit you know I just fucked up because people lose friends now because of all this bullshit and it's like dog we on the same team yeah like we want to make money we want to fuck we want to eat we want to sleep yeah and live life and do they do it all again tomorrow like who doesn't want to do that like if you don't want to eat sleep make money work like be healthy and do it all over again like stop listening to my shit because I was wrong with you yeah you know I'm saying like worse than wrong with me already worse than wrong with us issues issues I got issues but you got issues issues I got issues if I'm a sick fuck like I might be bipolar I don't know I got anxiety sometimes 80D you know I'm undying no stand-up mother you know see I ain't about to go see what I got yeah and so well like but like I'm a sick fuck but like I have core beliefs I want to work out on a good morals I want to be a good dad you know and I want to fucking wake up happy like that's it yeah but like I get I don't know the people that don't I don't know they're not on that I don't know it's weird I don't know I know what they are right some folks be on that funny shit oh no they're aliens bro yeah I mean I need to meet some aliens man they're probably cool as fuck you think hey okay so you think they're in the sky or in the water all three all three what's the third one here here you think as do you think it's possible that the aliens are the creators yeah and that very much so our DNA is 96% ship they're the more advanced evolution of us yeah it doesn't sound too far-fetched you know I mean religious people believe there's a guy who could walk on water and fucking revive after after three days you know and fucking make the blind see the crippled walk yeah so why wouldn't people think that yeah yeah yeah I mean so I'm also like that you know I you know I believe in dividing the rest you know I believe in in a in a in a higher power right I believe I believe in God because a God a universal being has saved me a couple times when I've been in really bad spots yeah right where like I may or might not I may or may not have been about to be hurt really bad right like life-threatening shit you know like on some hood shit right yeah and bam I'm out of it yeah like well because there's something right there's something there right and so like I believe in something but like at the same time it's like when I don't know anything I'm sure there's something right yeah I'm sure there's something I'm just I get mad because I'm like well then fucking show yourselves like come on player like come on I mean look if you were not from this planet and you see how we treat our own people that are different would you wanna come fucking talk to these neighbors I'm gonna be I'm gonna knock on these motherfuckers door yeah like they shooting people in the house we from across the street I ain't knocking on nobody's door like look we'll wait till they chill out a little bit today kumbaya and get this shit together then we'll introduce ourselves because until then yeah yeah I feel that yeah I feel that man you see what they do to their nice animals they put them in cages all of them but no hell no we ain't doing none of that all of them all of them what happened didn't work the sound was off oh cool no sound cuz I had it on silent more people's watching you with no sound they can do that though thank you Liliana appreciate you okay no she cool she cool yeah she cool okay you got fans I got supporters you got supporters I got sorry okay yeah got any like weird fans or yeah of course we're supporters yeah like tell me about it there was one dude that okay do you know what devotees are no like someone that's devoted to you know and yeah well yeah but devotees are somebody who's strictly attracted to and fetishizes people that are disabled oh fuck yeah oh fuck so I get it the end one day and then he tells me he's like 80 no to devotees and I was like no wait it's a he it's a he it's a he and then he's like hey do you know the devotees and I'm like now you know it's like well look it up and then get back to me and I looked it up when I was like I just looked it up he was like do you have any of those and I was like no I'd be what I'm like well they for the compliment are but I'm not taking applications like no thank you I'm okay hey how often you get people hitting up like that on Instagram here and there and there when it's like that those message are usually getting from fucking guys well yes I'm saying this is weird right I mean no it's not weird I mean they shooting they shot like somebody to try to I say it's weird but then I think about it we we we're shooting our shot at females who makes them any different yeah on some crazy shit like if I were to do only fans I've because I've had this conversation okay about starting our only family and they would tell me it as I know myself my my demographic mm-hmm my audience would predominantly be males okay that's just that's what that is you know you don't see too many women subscribing to just just straight up men shit do they want to see they want to see like women I'm not gonna say what they all want to see but yeah a lot of what I heard is you know they want to see people having sex or me girl on girl I'm male on girl they just don't want to see fucking you know it's hot yeah it's just me it's gonna be more of a male demographic yeah but yeah I've gotten a few few little funny DMS so I've told a couple people this story putting my baby mama and one of my co-workers so like two weeks ago I'm in the hood I'm in Highland Park I'm in the hood you know and I'm I did it like a little charity event where I'm doing free haircuts you know for kids okay and I'm on I'm also on the way to Long Beach to go work a fight right call lights out MMA right and a good show and I'm like speeding through the hood like cuz I mean we're not I'm in Highland Park so I'm like I'm a fucking just not stop I stop signs I'm gonna do what the fuck I want yeah what the fuck yeah and so I'm going to the homie shop New York has to go drop off a barber chair to go meet someone that has a truck right and I'm on a Vista right for anybody listening you know that knows the hood and fucking uh I'm coming to a stop sign so I see this last sign and so I come to like a rolling stop there's a car and I'm like okay cool chill right I don't know what the fuck I do I don't know if I don't know if I don't know if I look at my phone I don't know what I did right but somehow I fucking rear-ended this mother fucker I don't know oh fuck and so all right so I have I got three DUIs in my past right I have SR22 right now I have to have for three years right and I've that's been mandatory since 2020 for me but every time you stop I stop paying my insurance I got a reef fucking I start over I got to start over yeah they resuspend my shit right so so I'm like fuck my I already paid like a hundred bucks someone just for fucking limited liability dog it's fucking expensive right oh damn oh limited okay yeah no it's it's the minimum amount you can have in 2017 okay so okay we understand I go my shit went up because I had a red light ticket ah I just got one of those all right so look the first time I cut the second time I cut left the gunplay right here I left I bounced and I'm fucking I hit a I hit a red light and I go right red light camera right here Garfield and fucking Beverly be careful you go that way you know what I think I got one there bro I got one there that's the what I'm talking about it's right there dog that's crazy so then a couple months ago the homie hit me up that's funny to come cut him up right here same spot right here I'm driving through fucking Monobello right here and I'm just like in Highland Park I'm riding through the stop signs not stopping yeah and I see and I fucking blow to a stop sign I look and I see a fucking Monobello PD Sergeant fucking parked and I'm not oh fuck maybe maybe he didn't see me so I'm fucking just driving normal pulls up behind I'm like fuck same area same fucking streets pretty much yeah so that's true but my lawyer shout out to my lawyer George guy goes hit him up if you need a good lawyer he does it all personal injury criminal everything you know he's he's working with me right now we gonna you know okay because I cannot afford fucking for my insurance to go up so yeah I feel that yeah I cannot afford for that shit dog I can't right okay so backtrack to my story right yeah so I'm like I'm like what the fuck am I gonna do I'm like oh no right so I fucking pull over his car only has like a little black spot okay cool but soon as I get out his fucking home girl is like fuck this fool get his insurance take his license take pictures fuck this mother fucker what the fuck I'm now him this little agent kid comes out he goes hey are you okay I'm gonna go yeah are you okay he was gonna yeah he goes um I'm like and that day I forgot my license and I'm like oh you know what dog honey I'm a licensed on me because we have insurance like well yeah here yeah I give him a picture it was gonna get your name your number at give my name my number I said all right he goes look it doesn't really like anything now we're good you know I said please dog please you know I'm praying to God I'm like please bro right saying I'm on the way to Long Beach these fights and I get a text message from him mm-hmm they are gonna take some yeah yeah you're kind of hot oh fuck oh fuck don't be with it I'm like oh thanks and I'm like uh he's like a thing we could work something out I'm gonna call I won't call the insurance what you mean yeah bro like if you read your things like by a guy and I said no well you want to he says like are you down like low-key we can meet up he goes I'm from Vegas but we can meet up I leave I leave on Monday yeah yeah and I'm like I don't think that's gonna work out for me bro and he's like come on man like he's like I wouldn't report it to the insurance I'm like well I kind of got it like a family and a kid and like I don't want her to leave me for cheating on her so that's probably not gonna wear out for me goes yeah it goes look he was I'm here till Monday if you don't want to report the insurance we're gonna meet up and he's like I'll eat you up tomorrow he trying to harvey so they look like I told you I'm not a bad guy I'm a decent I'm a decent guy yeah yeah so in my head I'm like I want to push this off a cliff like over getting hit I'm gonna kill that throw so quick but so I'm like I'm not to fucking take this for the fucking Angela's crest highway the five mm-hmm dump this what the fuck is that I'm like fuck bro like this is gonna fuck her you was going next to that I heard my cred bro like everyone's like drink you got a dick suck my guy and he going to Vegas you wouldn't know I mean hey I would know I would know you know you know every time I have sex oh shit you know that memory right oh fuck talk about fuck it talk about talk about a good fucking way to last look hey there you go there you go all right so the so then I'm like fuck so then I'm working I'm fucking stressed out Sunday comes I'm chilling yeah and then I get a text and he's like he goes hey bro he goes hey what's up and I was like what's up and he goes a because I'm kind of sure it's not about this he goes you just sent me 60 bucks and we call it even and I'm like oh yeah I will be yeah I said I sent that shit right away I said we good he said we good I said like the motherfucking lie oh my boy funny that funny as fuck dog dog like my insurance rates about to go up but my dick ain't no I just you know like he probably had a pill ready just in case you had a little trouble in everything I told you know and I told like a couple two you know two females and they're like what what they were like I would have done it first of all you're a girl yeah of course you say you would have done it yeah yeah right but like they just said it no nonchalant like should have done it yeah like what the fuck like but God God forbid I do do it I ain't got my survivor not that there's anything wrong with that not that there's nothing wrong with that yeah yeah yeah you does not just prefer to get my dick so buy a woman yeah okay yeah period period period strictly pussy you like you wonder like I like my wings boneless yes let's go and my boy that shit was so traumatized dog the fact that you almost I pulled up to the homies barbershop after that and he's like what's wrong with you you sweating I'm like I'm fucking stressed out right now and this is after you already dropped a 60 on a cash app no no this was before okay I'm already I thought of my residual stress right after the accident I pulled up to his barbershop open the hood you know and he's like what's wrong with you you fucking stress fuck my insurance might go up dog fuck what the fuck you know that's crazy yeah I'm a boy oh my god so yeah this sort of fuck it depending on how much my insurance was gonna go up man I might have took that call you know oh man I am yeah that was I was stressed out I was really stressed out like if they trying to make my insurance 500 a month fuck that which equates to 6,000 a year oh come here little Asian boy you know insurance is going up in California right yeah hot it's because um there was a what was it there was like a thing that they did where they couldn't raise their insurance for a few years during a period of time they couldn't raise their insurance so they get all that fucking right now yeah they get any money back now whoever becomes president next whether it's a Democrat or Republican can one of y'all motherfuckers fix this shit drop inflation drop groceries drop gas house prices drop everything I go to Costco so I don't complain about gas bro I pay like three like 375 again I feel like when you go to Costco or Sam's though I feel like the amount of time you wait in that line if there is a line it's just as much as you would have spent fucking getting regular gas you know what Costco is it in and out at Starbucks of gas bro the lines are long but they move fast mmm yeah and me I don't got to get up out the car I was like me me me me and they look they see a little handicap lately black oh shit yeah cuz when I get out then they're like fuck the wheelchair got out so they're like damn they're scrambling around like why'd you get out sir I got I honked a few times and y'all didn't answer I don't like to wait like okay well next time just just let us know just let us know all right just please let us know damn yeah yeah anyway it's a bad look I guess yeah I guess so yeah man I'm I don't know what so I live in Irvine well there is a Costco there is a Costco yeah but cost was expensive now I think no I don't know there's probably the area what how much is Costco cuz I got what the gas no the memberships fucking one-time annual payment of 60 bucks 60 bucks what you talking about man I'm being a cheap ass huh yeah fuck you making money right back in gas in a week true true and then you get to go inside a Costco to free samples and shit yeah return policy is crazy they take everything back hey hey I go if I go to stories and I return shit they would like you know whose return policy is dope Amazon oh shit I bought us I bought a handshake from a car use it for like three weeks mm-hmm and I sent that shit back oh shit alright okay yeah yeah you know I'll be doing that shit yeah hey shout out to Costco yeah shout out to Costco yeah what what's your biggest privilege from Costco what what do you buy the most gas oh just yeah I'm mainly there for the gas but I recently started being bougie and shit so I like sparkling water I like my little Sam Pellegrino oh okay so they got like 20 packs of Sam or 18 packs of Sam Pellegrino for like 30 bucks and each one at the liquor stores like 389 yeah so that's man I'm definitely my money right there hey Pellegrino has been around for a long long time shout out to Pellegrino's punch in the homie damn man well Pellegrino it we Pellegrino talk to you I did that to you I did that to you in my fault I did that ass oh you got my ass hey so alright we won't get back on track this year we'll see we got like like like 15 minutes let's see what we got here all right oh damn I should win by that yeah you know saying it's crazy interesting dog thank you hey you ever how many podcasts you've been on I've been on a few I've been on a few I'm they've all been I'm sure they all have been interesting though yeah I will I would say the only ones that are kind of dull would be like the ones where it's over zoom or it's like where it's just just on the phone call audio yeah or there was one well my boy was ready starting up so I'll give it to my boy Galen Nash shout out Galen Nash he a comedian for tomorrow okay but we did a podcast in my car okay he came to the crib okay we both hopped in my car okay and did it there that's dope yeah that works you know I'm saying yeah see like this okay like the zoom is cool I thought zoom was gonna be cool cuz my homie gave me a mic right and and I was like okay I can use it on a computer I thought zoom was gonna be cool because I could like reach people in other states yeah you know that hasn't really happened you know but but it's different like being here is better dog like yeah in person cuz you get energy that's why you get you get limited if not like no energy from somebody over that's why how you were saying that you took a pre-workout you were able to feel like you can do that because you weren't in a professional setting like this yeah you know like this is a week like we damn near chillin yeah yeah yeah it's I is you're not looking at a screen you're looking at somebody's eyes yeah you know it's funny I should have known our most interesting part of our conversation would be the money I should yeah I should have known you know I'm saying shout out to royalty honey packs you know hey royalty honey pack holla boy I holla back I'm gonna see you honey back I'm gonna hit the world be like a dog I shot at you at least I shot at you I at least 17 times dogs show us some love let me be your first wheelchair sponsor let's go baby let's roll yeah there's a there's a there's a yeah I've seen a couple spots I have them right by where I work there's 711 there's a liquor store my students be telling me about that shit they were like hey there's some money back okay okay it's funny that they got the honey packs and all she just right around the Vietnamese coffee places oh no location I'm like a setup though it sounds like a setup bro let me tell you dog let me tell you when we went back get back since 2021 I was like I don't know 678 months over right okay I'm an almighty I'm living in so we're living more than they gotta show coming up in more than let's go and I go to the gym fitness 19 up in like we're and then I take the bus back to almighty and I get back I'm looking for my feet hurt it's a Sunday my feet hurt I'm looking for a massage place okay foot massage right I find this spot okay I walk in the most beautiful Asian woman I've ever seen in my fucking life and I mean ever yeah banging body oh better than Lucy Lou all that type in tight dress okay oh my god answers the door she like you on my side and I'm like yeah okay I'm like you do for my side she said no only for body the deportation I say how much she said $40 okay I had like six I had like 60 bucks like to my name yeah all right to my name okay and I'm like fuck it you know I'm like all right fuck it and we going and she tells me to take everything off and so look let me tell you if you want a massage parlor and they tell you to take everything off there's a front all the time like a hundred percent of time I feel like okay they'll usually say that because otherwise they don't like they don't stay in your underwear if you're not comfortable but but if they tell you take or or if you take it all off and they come in and they start giggling that too that might mean you got a little dick though oh no I don't know about that no I mean like not to you but I'm gonna like she come in and goes no more like that's really like more like when they come in and they like they like put their hand on your leg oh okay okay got you like it's motherfuckers welcome the best run money yeah and so so I take it all off right and I'm like okay but I really okay on everything on my fucking life right I wanted a fucking foot massage her right and she's like a she didn't want to happen in 60 bucks I said I got a money right now you know and she like I'll fuck you right now for a hundred twenty dollars yeah and I'm like oh my god this is like the fucking girl of my dreams what the fuck did I what the girl you know the way she look the way she the way she look visually literally not visually all right and I'm like why is this bitch I'm glad this woman got to be offering me sex yeah for money yeah like really yeah like and I can save her let's go back I can save her now there was probably some fucking Asian pimp in the back waiting to shoot me yeah let's try you know that's it yeah so I said I was like I know I just want a massage and she fucking got mad she gave me this half ash massage for like 10 minutes yeah even though I paid for 30 minutes and she said okay done oh shit she's like you're gonna tip me and I was like what I was like what the fuck and I'm like I had like 10 bucks left I was like I guess I was like and I'm gonna sound so bad right now but I don't go fuck as a podcast as a dull podcast I'm a keeper what everybody I'm gonna keep it up but I said at least can you show me your titties like fuck I don't like fucking beautiful woman like 50 dollars later like I'm like what the fuck happened that's fucking funny it's what she did she showed me okay at least she had a good heart yeah she put a good woman good what am I she put them out yeah I was like oh my god they're beautiful but yeah so I still kind of should I be walking into like alright you know see that's why I don't go to massage parlor cuz I'm scared like when I because I haven't got a massage in a minute like that's usually the benefit of having a girl right yeah the things that I like getting from my girl okay so when I be asking my boys like hey y'all don't even fucking any massage possible like oh yeah like no no no no you got that face already I know you don't have me go to the fucking chinito's in the mall yeah with the folding stores it'll be like come here I massage you you know mm-hmm I can't do it I can't yeah ah cuz as soon as that shit happens I'm like oh shit it's TMZ about to pop out yeah from TMZ yeah yeah yeah I feel that I feel that man I'm man I ain't got a good massage in a minute okay so look let me tell you the ones that are legit are like the Thai massage places hot you what's with me in the mean hot stones okay what I'm not trying to be racist but maybe Vietnamese Chinese from what I've seen yeah yeah you know those I've gone to multiple races multiple times to legit get massages and I've been offered almost every time oh shit every fucking time but the funny fucking thing is I'm not I'm not a fucking model I'm not I mean I'm I do I you know I don't think I'm ugly but I don't I'm not gonna say I'm handsome or cute or anything but I think I could do all right yeah every fucking time one of these ladies offers this shit it's an old Asian lady and I'm like even if I wanted to like you're fucking like 60 years old but I mean you got to think about the experience she might have a little yeah that experience might trump any look look would you rather get a hand job from an experience I'm talking about like 50 years of jerk and experience or fucking Indian burn on your dick from some pretty true true you know me give me mama sign give me miss a keen all day see like that's okay I'm a visual motherfucker those your eyes and use your imagination we was just talking about only happens when I can picture my girlfriend I love you I love you Pookie oh it's a shout out hot to it to my that girl man that girl man so famous that she cute she cute she like she a hometown she a hometown cute nice feel Tennessee yeah like she wild but like she like conservative yeah like she'll cook you dinner after fucking dancing on the bar oh yeah yeah we all need that in our life all day shout out to the country mm-hmm so man I lost my train and thought again but damn I'm thinking about girls now telling you that man a distraction in the mother yes you know hey girls are a biggest blessing but our biggest downfall yeah but only if we allowed to be but because then again that's also but it's but if you're a solid individual you could have a mother fucking queen next to you mm-hmm fucking helping you start the way helping you get through everything yeah you know helping you get through fucking and if you don't know how to pick you could have a motherfucker that's gonna bring you right down to that gutter and then skip yeah you know straight up straight up so now before we wrap this up I got one more question always wrap it up as a matter of fact I don't like burning okay did I haven't since I was younger but yeah I had frequent flyer miles bro I fit some more than a few times yeah like the first time I caught some funky Desiree the first time I caught some I caught gonorrhea and chlamydia at the same time oh fuck okay so I went to juvie and they tested me and then I got the phone called afterwards oh shit so I was scared but when I get when I went to go fucking get my pennant center whatever she fucked up by telling a 16 year old this because what she told me I was like hey you know oh and what's gonna happen you know my god I'm so scared and she was like oh don't worry it's not the major it's like the common cold mmm so I was like oh so this ain't serious she's like yeah just come and take some pills you're good oh we good we out there running oh you know but now it's crazy right now there's there's now I'm an adult now I know that some shit you can't give back yeah there's mm-hmm mm-hmm I know someone who has herpes and he was like dog that's just for life oh yeah I'm like what and that's that's the minor that's the fucking least of all the evils you know I'm coming there's fucking a there's HIV there's crazy shit yeah look I want to go get a test recently like maybe a couple months ago just because I hadn't gotten one in a minute you know and there was new shit on the list mmm like I remember HPV chlamydia gonorrhea a syphilis there was like five more fucking updates god damn this shit got like iPhone bro like there's like trick-a-meter there's some there's some shit that's like oh it's throat gonorrhea oh fuck and there was like I'm gonna test for that - I was like yeah test for everything test for everything and then they come back they're like okay are are you bisexual are you homosexual now I was like no why it was like as usually when it comes to people getting tested for throat gonorrhea it's because they're sucking dick yeah whether if it's a woman or a man because you get back there and that's how you get infected back there some like oh mmm but I eat this shit out of some pussy so tested anyway fuck I lick the back of a bitch's belly button you know that okay yeah but yeah so I've had frequent flyer miles yeah I uh to the point where like I've been like can I get some condoms and they're like motherfucker really this is your fourth time here this month you don't need condoms when I was young I was savage man like I was a dirtbag when I was young shit I feel that I feel that look I've taken I'm taking the the HIV I've done that one twice yeah whatever yeah I know I didn't have it right but tell me why I'm like shitting bricks that's that's that's the process but I know I didn't have it that's the process but you still be like man I'm like funky ass bitch you like like man I got drunk that one day god damn look you know hey shout out to shout out to all y'all women man spreading the love and a little more than that man I was part of a little a little chlamydia epidemic and long beat for a while so oh all right instead of spreading that I'm spreading positive vibes now go let's go so speaking of positive vibes all right one last thing what do you see in the future for you success and happiness that's fucking go success and motherfucking happy let's go whatever entails that whatever the equation is that that's the fuck I'm gonna get have you done life factoring convenient to me well yeah yeah all right all right you're not letting over your next pop I'm boy I know hey we have to get you to the old we don't have to get you to do a comedy comedy show and the being the music coffee spot let's go what hey what homie do we got a call let me know yeah yeah yeah we need that we need that plug ASAP yes because I'm familiar with the beat in the meet Cambodian come by all that I came up in Long Beach so they got Cambodia town and all that so we good yes go before I get off the mic shot to homie Elias right here to see it in their trainer check them out on only wheels dot com ah yes there you already know check them out on Instagram look them up let's get it in their tainer my boy keeping it real all day take talk YouTube all that let's go I appreciate you coming out here dog appreciate you for having me bro that's y'all's yes sir let's go shutting it down Got to go.