LIVIN OUR CRAZY LIFE
SOCIAL MEDIA
Hey guys, welcome back to another week of Live In Our Crazy Life podcast. I'm Olivia. I'm Megan and today we're going to talk about social media. The good, the bad, what it's caused and our perspectives on it. Just something that's very exciting is that we are going on a trip. We're going to Mexico the day that you're watching this. So that's exciting. And the next episode you see, we will still be in Mexico. So wish us luck that we're reading, getting 10 and eating good food in Mexico. Social media is a topic that we've been thinking on for a while just because it's a pretty big topic and we have a lot to say about it. So I'm just going to start by saying that I got social media when I was, I honestly I was older than a lot of people. In middle school everyone already had social media. I didn't. I wasn't allowed social media. No, I was playing Flappy Bird. I didn't even know what Snapchat was and then I got bullied in grade eight. So because I didn't have Snapchat on Instagram or like any of that stuff. And so they bullied me and said like, well, you can't be friends of this because you don't have Snapchat or Instagram. I'm like, okay, like, okay. Yeah, I was actually also peer pressured into getting social media in grade nine. I got it in grade nine. I didn't get it until grade nine. I got bullied in grade eight. I still didn't get it. Me neither. So so which ones did you get? Which ones did you get when you first started? Instagram, Snapchat, and that's it. Yeah, that's all I had. I did Instagram first and then I got Snapchat also. I didn't have the musically thing. Everybody had music. No, I don't have that. I only had Snapchat and Instagram. Snapchat is so stupid. I think it's the stupidest app ever out there. Personally, my kids will not be having any type of social media until they're the age of making that decision. Yeah, I don't want if I have kids, I don't want them really on social media either when you're old enough to make your own decision. It's not like you're in grade six. People have it now in like grade four. What are you doing? It's crazy. What are you doing? But also my issue with it is that it creates, like we'll get deeper into this later, but it creates so much insecurity that I don't want my kid or whatever dealing with all of that side growing up. I don't think that's a healthy mindset. I think there's so much competition in it and everything, but we'll get into that later, but no. You don't need Instagram. You don't need Snapchat. Unless you have a business to be promoting and doing, I don't know. Unless you're, it's because I have a personal Instagram account, but I don't go on Instagram and scroll on Instagram all day. Now TikTok, yes. I will admit that I do sit on TikTok for probably like a little bit of my time. Yeah, but you're also busy in the day. Yeah, you're busy in the day. So if you want a little mental break, that's okay. But also, I feel like people put too much pressure on what you post on Instagram. Oh, like you don't need to be posting like these like, you could post whatever you want. If you want to post a thousand times a day on your story, you can like, because it's for you. It's for you. If you want to post a picture of your coffee or you want to post a picture of a leaf or you can like people used to think that was so totally used to do that. And then you get both of you for that. I used to post like my little, my twins, when I had Instagram, like I know they were babies and I would post them and then I got made fun of why you posting babies on your, on your Instagram because it's my Instagram. I don't want to be a hater off the jump, but it's just my belief that if you are of a certain age and you still are actively using Snapchat and Instagram as dating websites practically, then you have an issue. And if you're using, if you ask for my Snapchat, immediately, we are not. No, that's crazy. That's crazy. But I just think that the apps are misused. Like, the thing for me is just that Instagram is good for business. It's good. If you want a personal account, that's to each their own. I don't care what you do on your social media account, but it got turned into something where it's literally just people sliding into your DMS and wanting to send you messages or people on Snapchat that are sending half their face and asking you for nudes and stuff like that. That was an issue for me back when I was in high school. So I just deleted everything. I deleted Instagram, deleted Snapchat and I was off of all social media for like three and a half years. But then I started my personal account now. So I have two accounts. I have obviously the one for our podcast and then I have a personal account, but that is still business for me. And I think that that's the only way that I could do it because I am not a good person on social media. I know my own boundaries and I know that it takes up way too much of my time and it is a distraction for me. If I have it, I mean, it's not like I don't have self control on these platforms. I just prefer not to even have the option to scroll on them. And so I also didn't have TikTok for a very long time, but then I got it back because for business, you know, we have our account, but I just think that I know myself knowing that I don't want all these accounts and all these platforms and different apps that just take my time. So speaking of issues, we should talk about, you know, insecurity, comparison, all of that on there. Because I think that's a huge thing for, you know, everybody, but also younger people growing up on social media apps. I feel like the problem is, is these young girls go on social media and they see like the Kardashians, for example, you know, like people that aren't even real, like they have surgeries and like that's what they're promoting. That's what they're like saying is like a pretty, pretty girl when really like it used to be like your natural, like your natural face was like beautiful. And like, it's really sad because so many people are so beautiful, but they just think that they're not because they look at these like unrealistic standards and they just think like, Oh, why don't I look like that? Why does my body not look like that? But it's not real. And like life before all of the social media never was about like what you look like or like the body standards now is like not what it used to be. And it's actually really sad to see like it actually breaks my heart for many people, like even men like comparing themselves like that's not even realistic. And it's, it takes a long time to come to terms with that. But once you do, it's like, it's like, wow, like you, you're really gonna sit there and waste your whole day, like comparing yourself when like life is so short, like you're beautiful, like everybody has different looks to themselves, which makes them beautiful, you know? And I think the unfortunate thing about that is that it's not even their choice. These young girls that are seeing the stuff, it's not their choice to compare themselves with these influencers. And they always want to, you know, maybe act older or think they have to look a certain way because that's, but it's being pushed down their throat, they have no choice but to kind of see these things and feel a certain way because the thing about social media is that the algorithm is specifically designed for you, right? It knows every single thing about you more than you even know about yourself. And it specifically shows you things to make you worse. That's the issue that I had with social media is that it knows every single little thing that you could potentially be insecure about or that you could potentially have issues with or just even if you don't have issues yet, you don't even know these things exist, they will create them for you because the thing about social media that I find is that it is designed to make you suffer. It's designed to make you lose out on time. It's designed to make you lose your motivation. It's designed to make you hate yourself. And I think to a certain extent, like when you realize that it doesn't have to be like that, it's fate. It's different. But for all these young girls and boys and even even older people, it is specifically designed to kick you when you're down already. I don't understand why it's such, why it's designed to be such an exploitation device. Like I think that's stupid. And then many people stay there. They get used to it and it's a cycle and they just like, oh, okay, like I'm home and we just got my phone and just and then it's like you just beat yourself up. But when you take yourself out of that situation, it's like when you spend your whole like, come on, like, you have what? Like, how many hours in a day? 24 hours, but you sleep for some of them, right? Go fill your mind with other things. I'm not saying that, look, I'm not above social media, right? Like social media, it's a part of the world now, unfortunately, which honestly, I wish it wasn't going to make things probably a lot better in this world. But it is, it is what our world's come to. But you don't have, it's a choice. You don't have to sit there for hours on end, scrolling on TikToks or, you know, Instagram or any of that stuff. Like, that's fake. Go live real, you know? Yeah. And that's a huge problem, which is why, like, like it's not having no iPad. I'm not an iPad kid. Oh, that's a whole other thing. Parents condoning children's behavior on social media. Number one, I think a big issue is parents that not only give their kids electronics or give them permission to make their own accounts, but parents that exploit their children, make their children accounts and profit off of their children, ran by parents. That is so not healthy. What does that is so not healthy? What does the world come to is what is what my question really is? Like, why are we having five, I swear to God, I see five year olds on like five year old influencers doing skincare video like go play outside. My kid will not look, I get it like, you know, they say like, Oh, you don't get it until you're a parent like your, your kid crying at the restaurant, but then that you decided to have a kid, right? So take care of your kid. You don't get a coloring book for your kid. Right. You don't need a color book. Talk to your kid. Talk to your kid. Don't play like I have younger siblings and I don't see them play outside. Like I did on the streets until the nighttime and then you like ran out for dinner and then you go with your friends and go for a little bit longer. No, like these kids, like my brother is spending, he had a job in the summer and he's announced when he was laying on Roblox. It's not even real. That's the thing is that, Oh God. And just yeah, I've had kids at restaurants. That's just, that's crazy to me. I feel very disappointed for the child and the parent every time I see that. It's like, what are you doing? Very disappointing. These kids watch these, the same thing, even with TV, kids watch these TV shows and they're like, Oh, I wish I could be like her or I wish I could be like him or why is my life not like this? It actually you develop bad habits for your kids when they show up. But also your life does not like that because you're busy doing this. Like, I think also a large part of social media, when you're scrolling there and you're comparing yourself to these people, half the reason why you feel so bad and why you compare yourself is because you're not there. Right there, they're living their life and they're posting about it. And I get that that may be upsetting for you if you're not there. But the reason you're not there is because you're sitting there scrolling looking at people. You shouldn't want your life to be what other people's life is. Literally just click that power button on your phone, set it down and go out and live your own adventure, live your own life. And people forget about that. People forget that like once you click that power button, that all the people, you know, leaving hate comments and bullying you, they disappear. All the people who are, you know, living all these lives, they disappear. When you click that button, they don't exist. You're free to go live your own life. So honestly, I would suggest for anyone watching this that, you know, has been wanting to take a break off social media, podcast off right now, and go. Yes, yes. Turn our podcast off right now, go outside and go and, you know, do something. It doesn't have to be serious or go get a job or go for a life. Go like anything. Another thing is social media cleanses. So I obviously took a break off social media for what like three and a half years. And I think that gave me so much time to evaluate my relationship with social media and with people in my life and kind of my goals and my hobbies and make more time for what I wanted to do. And I learned so many new things and sold my time with different things. Even if you just take, you know, a social media break for a week or even a day, you'll see your life transform. Yeah, I also took a break too. And it was great. I just had so much time. Exactly. For like, I took my breaking quarantine. So there was like actually nothing to do. Like I didn't, I got a job like later on in quarantine, but like I really wasn't working like I am now. And so I had so much time and like, I don't know, some days I would just do like random makeup on myself or, you know, I went to like every single day because social media. We were, we were brighter people without social media and spending our time. And when we took a break, we were more vibrant people because it takes so much time without even the toxic side of it. It still takes up so much time. Like even if it was like, this, the best thing ever, and there was no like toxicness on it, it would still take up so much of your time. And that's also a huge problem that it's taking up. Take a break from it. We're not saying delete it. Obviously, like you don't have to. Obviously, unfortunately, it is the way to communicate with people now. But what happened to text and phone? Like, yeah, nobody pick up the phone and just talk in the phone. No, everyone reaches out to you. They DM you like, I'm not speaking on DM. Thank you. No, also the whole side of it being like a dating app, but practically is, that's so out of touch for me. I do not answer people's DMS. I do not partake in anything like that. Yeah, I don't even take it. What am I talking about? I don't partake in any side of that because that's crazy to me. That's so crazy to me that when someone approaches you, they come up to you and they say, "What's your Instagram?" before they say, "What's your name?" No. No, I will not be giving it to you. I actually don't even give my Instagrams like anybody. I give my podcast though. No! We went out. Sorry, this is unrelated, but we went out what two weeks ago now? A while ago. A while ago, a while ago. Yeah, back when we were in Montreal. And not to be one of those people, but every time someone came up and tried to ask for Instagram, we were literally put in our YouTube and Instagram for our account. But if you are someone who finds themselves always reaching for your phone, you have that addiction to social media and that serotonin boost from checking likes and stuff. That's a whole other topic. It's just that the addiction that comes with likes and the dependency on validation of an example. That's why also it's going to tie with another topic. I feel like all of this ties in with yourself, it all ties in with being secure with yourself, self-love, all of that. It all ties in. They all relate to that. If you don't have security in yourself, then forget social media. You might as well just not go on it because it will be toxic for you because you're not secure with yourself. You shouldn't be posting for validation from other people or if they think your picture is tall or pretty or whatever. Who cares? No. Deep down, who cares? Life is so much bigger than that, guys. And when you realize that and you really come to terms with it, life is actually beautiful. There's a side of it that is how it used to be in the olden days. And that's not even so much for people our age or older, but for those younger girls and boys that are in middle school or high school that are posting pictures and you're caring about how many likes you know you're getting on your picture or whether or not your friends are commenting or if it's being sent in a group chat and you're being fun of if you're crush commented. I know that it doesn't make a difference us saying this right now, but it doesn't exist and it doesn't matter. Do not base your own worth off of these people because you will grow up and you will move away from that school and you will move away from that town and these people don't matter and these likes, they don't exist because once again, when you turn off that power button, it's not real. It disappears and you're free to live your life and to breathe and you are so much more than what other people think about you or you're so much more than being hot. Like everybody, they post these pictures and you know, you take a thousand pictures for one to be good, you post it and you don't get the likes you want so you delete it or you don't get the comments. Take the full sexy stunning and you're upset. You take it as something against you. It's not real. It doesn't matter. Well, you don't you won't understand that until you've had that relationship for yourself. Understand it. There's nothing to be said until you realize that, but exactly it all circles back to being secure with yourself. Exactly all circles back and that's why you should take a break. You should take a social media break. It doesn't matter if it's for once again, a day, a week, however long, just take that break and think about what your actual use on social media is because that's also important. What are you using it for? You know, if it's for a business, then it's different. If it's for you're using it in a different way, then say example, it's your personal account or if you're using it, you know, it makes a big difference whether you're using it to get validation on the way you look or whether it's for reaching out to people stuff. It matters. Also, if you're using social media to hide behind a screen and hate on people that you need to actually take a hard look at yourself in the mirror and whatever I turn into because that there is nothing actually more inhumane than doing that. Like, I'm sorry, but if you are hating on somebody's content or looks or anything on there, it's a problem within yourself and you need to really just put in perspective what's going on. If you're getting hated on, it has nothing to do with you. It all has to do with that person itself. And again, it goes back to self and honestly, we should definitely do a podcast. Yeah, that's going to be a big one because that's very important and let them hate. Obviously, people take hate different ways, but again, it's a realization. Like, you just have to have a realization that like, nothing matters. Like, nothing matters at the end of the day. Like, I can't emphasize that enough. Like, it doesn't matter. It's not real. Like, the people around you, the people in your life, that's what's real. Like, that's not the social media. You don't know this person. Like, I can't even like, just please, please, but that's another thing. When you do start to, you know, treat your social media differently or you decide to, you know, post different things or take a break off social media. Like, when I deleted my, my apps, I lost all my friends except for her because she's the only real person that actually cared about me. When you delete your apps or treat social media differently, you start, you know, not caring about all these surface level things. You lose a lot of people and that's a common theme in our podcast, I find, but you, you lose a lot of people, they distance themselves from you. They don't reach out to you anymore. They don't, they don't text you. And that's something you notice when you don't have these apps where people are constantly seeing your pictures and putting a little like or whatever. That's not real friendship. That's not someone reaching out to you. That's not someone, you know, asking you to hang out or be friends with you. That's such a surface level thing that it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. What matters is people that reach out to you and ask you to hang out or if you're doing okay. And this is not an everyday basis thing. This, it doesn't matter what the timeframe is, but real people stick around. When you don't have these, all these guys leaving likes on your stories or pictures, you don't have all these girls, you know, these girls that you think you're friends with. They're not your friend. They're not your friend. When you stop posting, when you stop reaching out to them, they are not your friend. They do not care about you. And it's just sad, but it's not real. It's not real. Life becomes so peaceful when you just shut it off. Like, when you don't have your phone, it's amazing. Like, I lost my phone for like two days once and it was amazing. Yeah. And then you weren't even searching for it either because I don't need a character to be honest. The only thing I need my phone for is my, like, now, like, I have work to do on my phone, but like, my music, I do need my music, honestly. So, but, um, but that's the thing. It's, it's such a weight. It's such a weight. You just have it in your back pocket. You have it in your purse. You have it with you all the time. And that's, it's a hassle. It's a weight on your head. And when you just leave it at home or when you just aren't always on it, you know, you can bring it with you for safety. But when you just don't touch it, it's so freeing. Not having always, where's my phone? Oh, someone reaching out to me. Is this, is this that? What is like four hours going to do? Like, no, you know, it's not that important. Go take a walk. No, no one's actually realistically, four hours is nothing. Also, if someone's reaching out and it's an emergency, they can call you or they can text you. They don't need to DM you or they don't need to send you a Snapchat. So I'm putting so much word on yourself. That's very, very sad. They will, they will. And not at the time they will be very upset at you. But that's the thing. I'm okay with some, my child being upset at me for just having boundaries because they will come to appreciate it. I appreciate that. They need to be structured. There needs to be structured. And my kid will have structured. Like, to be honest, like, no, they're not, they're not having social media, like my period. Yeah. So you're 18. Sorry, sweetie. I'd rather them have a boyfriend at the age of grade eight than social media, to be honest. So, like, no. But with that being said, there's also a good side to social media. You know, there's a lot of food recipes on there. There's a lot of safety advice. There's a lot of businesses. There's a lot of positivity. So it just depends on how you use, you know, the platforms and more importantly, how they use you because they use and abuse you. But not, I've already said my piece on that. But I just, there's a good side. And it's not all bad, of course. So just, so just think about your usage. Think about why you're on it, what, what you gain from it and what the cons are and adjust accordingly because I just think that it's not all bad. It's not all hate. It's good. It's, yeah, there's pros and cons to everything, just pros and cons social media. But I do think there's more cons and pros. But don't spend all your time on it because that, well, your years are going by, let's say from whatever grade you have it to your years, keep going by and you're watching these people grow and you're helping these people because you're one of them supporting them. Great. But where are you doing with your life? Like, you know, like, just be careful how you use it and be mindful, also respectful to yourself and other people on social media. And it's not a problem, I'm not saying it's a problem to have social media, but you don't need to spend your whole life on it. Yeah, there's things to be doing in the real world while you're here, you know? Great. Leave your thoughts about social media in the comments. You want to, you want to see what other people are thinking different perspectives. We hope you guys enjoyed this episode and we'll see you next Wednesday. Bye. We'll see you next Wednesday. Turn this off and go do something.
Social media can either be a time consuming insecurity creating monster or you can use it to your advantage… let’s talk about it.