[Music] Welcome to Trinking Brows, presented by GhostBed.com [Music] Sit back, relax it, grab a fucking trick. [Music] Yeah, welcome to Trinkin, bros. Hands up, live from the Brown Chug at University of Michigan. Part AF, Seltzer is now being served across the states. We've got Michael Raymond James on the show today. Go Blue, Mikey, how are you? I'm doing great, buddy. You know, what's an AF stand for? Armed Forces. Yeah, copy you. Armed Forces, it's awesome. This mazing blueberry is fucking outstanding, man. Thank you very much. Thank you. It's one of those things where you go and sit in the lab, literally a lab, like scientists and everything else. You feel like a lab coat and the whole thing? They're all wearing lab coats. Brian Cranston was there. That's awesome. Yeah, yeah. Breaking Bad, and Aaron Paul was there for a little bit. But it looks like a high school class, where you sit there, and there's Bunsen burners, and all that other stuff, and then you're trying like the levels, by like a tenth of a pH, and all this other stuff. And then finally, at the end of the day, you're blackout drunk. Yeah, because you've been drinking 8% samples all day. Now it sounds like high school to me. Correct. At first it didn't, you know what I mean? But that sounds like high school to me. Now it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then blackout drunk. Homeboy had a pull out couch in there, and I was like, what is this for? And he goes, we have another client coming in after you. And I get to pass the fuck out. And I'm like, oh, this is real. And he goes, yeah, because you're one of the higher ABVs we make here. 8%. I don't have a choice. Yeah. And so this one was, I think, seven or eight hours. So when you're going hard for seven or eight hours, even though the samples are like this big, you're still getting fucked up. It'll sneak up on you, man. Because it just goes down so easy. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. Buddy, like summertime, falltime, I don't give a shit. It is just so good. Cheers. I'm going to have another one. Thank you, buddy. Thank you. Obviously, you're a huge Michigan fan. I know you're always filming somewhere around the world. And I was like, hey, man, can you come out for this? Yeah. And you're like, Michigan, Texas, I can make it. I can make it work, I think. I can make it work. I just-- yeah, I just wrapped on Friday. So it kind of worked out perfectly. So are you done? We wrapped season four on Friday, yeah. Season four, Godfather of Harlem. Godfather of Harlem, yeah. It's a good show. Oh, yeah. It's an amazing show. It's great. It is. And season four is going to be nuts. It's going to be wild. Yeah, man. You're one of the last ones shooting a TV show right now. I know. So everybody's watching. It's weird, right? It's true. We've got nothing else to watch. And I feel like your show keeps growing year over year in ratings because now people are getting into it because they don't have enough content to watch. Well, yeah. And you know what I think helped, honestly, is it used to be in a channel called Epics, which nobody had ever heard of. Do you know what I mean? Yep. Because somebody decided that we ought to take the MGM library, create a movie channel, create our own shows, but we're not going to call it MGM. We're going to call it Epics because why? Not. You know what I mean? Let's ignore this brand that we have that has all this panache. And we'll just call something a name that means nothing to nobody. And so nobody had ever heard of it, right? Jeff Bezos was like, now, forget that. I want to buy the MGM library. So he bought Epics, rebranded as MGM Plus, and now it's on Amazon and Disney's the studio. So it's on Hulu. Yep. So yeah, so we're getting a lot more eyeballs on it now, you know, as it should. Which is awesome. How is Forrest Whitaker to work with? Fucking the best, dude. I mean, the guy is like, he's the sweetest. And I don't mean just like in the industry. He's like one of the sweetest, gentlest people I've ever met on the planet. He's just wonderful. He's a wonderful guy, man. I can't say enough good things about him. Everybody says that Dan looks like him. Just like him. I mean, it's spitting. It's the eyes. It's the eyes. Yeah. Right. Is that hard when he says, hey, where's your eyeliner? You're like, I don't know where it is. Stop. Where's your eyeliner? I love my motherfuckers. I love my favorites. I love them. And he's the next guy. Where's your eyeliner for us? First, we're going to find an eyeliner. OK? Did he joke about it? Pick one. Just pick one. Pick one. Did he joke about it? No, no, no, no. No, no, no. I would. I know. I know. Well, you would. Yeah. But you know, Forrest is a different dude. He's much more than, much more gentle, much more-- you know, he's not looking to make the joke. You know what I mean? So I'll go back to when we first met, by the way. Ryan said, hey, we're going to this bar. We're going to pick him with someone L.A. We're going to be my buddy, Mikey. And I was like, all right, cool. And we show up, sit in the table. I don't know if you remember this. Probably not. Yeah, because we have blackout that night. That's right. It's like high school. Yeah, real blackout that night. But I had never seen true blood. So we go and sit down. It's a table like this. We're in a bar, normal like this. Every single person is coming up to you every five seconds, taking a-- hey dude, big shoe, man, big fan, everything else. I finally looked at it, and I was like, yo, man, what the fuck is he in right now? He was like, oh, he's in his vampire show. And I was like, OK, OK, where? And it's like, oh, it's on HBO, whatever. It's called True Blood. And you were a cool guy. So many people were coming up to you throughout the night. I went back home and watched it. And I was like, oh shit, Mikey's a great fucking actor. Like, you can win an Oscar one day. You're sweet, man. But your first thought was, let me get him in this mouth guitar movie I've been working on. Put him on a tour bus with a live alligator, which, by the way, you told me on the day, that was not even in the script. That was just like, oh, on the day, this is what's happening. We have a live alligator. We're going to bring it on the bus. You're standing there. I'm going to be behind just like, no, no, no, no, no. How about this? How about I'm giving you a back massage? You know what I mean? Right behind you. I've got a live alligator right in front of my face. In your face. On a tour bus. Literally hissing. And the guy goes, don't worry. He's not going to bite you. I fed him like three hours ago, so he's going to be pretty docile. Because it wasn't either one of those Hollywood alligators. Like, he didn't go to Strasburg. You know what I mean? Like, it was like one that they just picked up out of a swamp in Louisiana and flew them out to LA. Did you do on True Blood? Did you do like a Creole accent? Well, it was Cajun accent. Cajun, yeah, yeah, yeah. Cajun accent. I had a guy named Errol Gidry, who was from Merman, Tall, Louisiana. It was a proper Cajun. It came over, awesome dude, really, he's fucking awesome. But he shows up as like Megadeth fucking t-shirt with like a bowl haircut. Like, you just like, you know what I mean? Like, put a bowl around his head. Like those little cartoons are just like with the scissors. Like, mo. Like, mo. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And yeah, man, he kind of, he hit me to the whole thing. Like, I learned so much about the Cajun culture and about Cajun food. Um, because my whole thing was like, I didn't want to, I want to die like coach, but I didn't want somebody from Harvard or Yale, you know what I mean? I didn't want a professor that knew how to make the diphthong change. I want somebody with like gumbo in their DNA. Yeah. And this guy was a die like coach from Michael Jeter in the Green Mile. No shit. Yeah, yeah. So I was like legit. I was like, what's that committing? And it came over, he was funny, he's funny as shit. And I was like, you're my guy. Yeah. So every episode, you know, he would come by and you come over the house and we'd chop up the script. Alan Ball, the creator, showrunner, like gave me sort of carte blanche to rewrite the scenes into like the Cajun dialect, the Cajun syntax, change around some words. Like, instead of like, how you doing? It became, how you doing, you know? Yeah. Yeah, that was great, man. Well, the weird thing is, to this day, it's such a beloveds cult classic. Yeah. Everybody still loves true blood. And then they wanted to come back. Right. Where they're like, hey, can this come back? Can we reboot it because that's what Hollywood's doing now? That's what they do now. Yeah. It's all about IP, right? Have you been pitched? No. No, no, no, no. I was talking about-- I would imagine they would want a whole new past. They would skew younger. Now? Do you know what I mean? Like, this one's like, oh, seven, bro. You know what I mean? We're a bunch of old motherfuckers now, dude. Well, you are. I'm 33. You're 33. Is this American? Can you ever stand those that way? Stand those that way. Nah, he's old as shit. I know. I know it. Well, this is-- No, 33 years up. Very tender age. Yeah. I thought I was going to get sex traffic last night. That's how young I was. You probably should be, though. Some because a van pulled up and they were like, hey, jump in. I was like, I'm not in college. I know I look like it, but you can't sex traffic me. I'm not going to be sex trafficked. No. I won't allow myself to be. All right? 100. I think you should do it. You think I should go and get in the van? Yeah, be a nice break from reality. And my kids and shit, just call my wife, hey, hon. Love you, taking a couple weeks off, going to try the sex trafficked thing for a little bit. Try the sex trafficking handle. Yeah, I see what goes. I mean, you want to do some guns on shit? That's guns on shit. Bring a camera. Oh, yeah, exactly. You know what I mean? Well, we got a guy for that. He's going to die. He's going to die right now. He might not live this weekend. No. Yeah, yeah. The Adderall rattlesnake is what we call one. And he's definitely going to die one of these seats. You know, he's going out to shoot Detroit tonight, that guy. I know. I know. I got a team of people in the city. Do you want me to send them along? I love to. Do we need some? Yeah, do we need some hard pipe hitting, you know? But if you do, no lie, he'll meet up with him. I'm not kidding. I'm not kidding. Well, I'm talking about just as a protection racket. You know what I mean? Yeah, of course. Yeah, yeah, of course. Feed him some hard AFs, and they'll be fine. Yeah, that's all you have. You had to do. Free booze goes a long way. It goes on a really long way. Absolutely. A lot of people. Yeah. I'm going to go to Terriers. Yeah. Terriers. Everybody loved it. You know, it's my wife's favorite show. Dude, it's one of my favorite jobs that I've ever done ever. I love that. Shay's a big fan of Terriers, which makes me happy. I've never seen it. What is it? It's-- Dentalogue. It was him and Dentalogue. It was a two-hander. Yeah, it was all FX. It was about these super low-rent private investigators that were-- we were unlicensed. He was an ex-cop who had been kicked off the force. I was like an ex-crook trying to figure it out. And too small to fail was kind of like the thing. We were unlicensed. We were just, you know, it was called Terriers because we were like, maybe not the best-looking guys on the block, you know? But we were tenacious. We were, you know, once we got on something, we wouldn't give it up. It was written by Ted Griffin, who wrote "Oceans 11." And then, you know-- Don't rebooting right now. They're doing 14 right now. Are they really? Yeah. I didn't even know that. Yeah. Brad Pitt and fucking-- Including-- Signed on already, yeah. Why not? Why the fuck now? What else is left? Yeah. It's like, hey, dude, what's that last chance? Let's take it. Let's just do that one again. One hundred percent, yeah. But I had Donald on the show maybe eight, nine months ago. You did? Yeah. Oh, yeah. So-- He's the best dude. He wrote Danny Trejo's biography. Yeah. And so him and Trejo came on the show, I've done a bunch of movies with Trejo, and I brought up Terriers to him. And he goes, oh, man, I love Mikey. And that was the greatest shot of my life, too. Oh, so good. So he feels the same way where he was just like, dude. You know, we had a house together when we shot that. Down in San Diego, in Mission Beach. And when the network found out that we were going to be living together, they're like, no, no, no, no, please, don't. Like, why? Is it because you were both vampires? No, it's because we're both actors. And they're like, fuck, and actors are insane. And you can't be together. I'm a two-hander, 13 hours a day at work. Go home and not want to kill each other. And we're like, no, dude, I've known this fucking guy, man, for years. This is before Terriers. I've known Donald. We did like an episode of Life Together, whatever. And he was adapting this carowack novel. And we were so sure in the shit. It was like, this guy's a fucking brother. We hung out. So we were buddies. And so, you know, they're like, please don't. We're like, fuck you, man. We got it. It's cool. And we got this house on the fucking beach. Like, literally, open the door. You're stepping on the sand on Mission Beach. And it was so good for the show, because we would come home after work every night, and we would just run lines with each other. So we knew everybody's work. Because we were so fucking prepared by the time we got the sentinel action. We were trying to figure it out. You know, we had done the homework with each other at all. It was like a rehearsal. It was like doing a rap company theater, you know? Yeah. And that never happens. Never happens, man. They never put you in the same hotel. No, I can't tell anybody. I mean, they're not wrong. We're nuts. But that one, it worked. You know what I mean? It was-- Yeah. These guys are wild. Oh, they're out of control. We got a box of drinking, bro. This there's in here today. People are getting wet. You should have shown 1 p.m. dude with 8% filters. 100%. It's over. It's all right. I got puked on last week for Christ's sakes. I got puked on in Illinois. But yeah, you got shaved sterilized. You can nearly execute it, I'm imagine. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, dear God, dude. I'm used to it. But you're glistening it. You're glistening. Your skin is glowing. I don't know what happened in Illinois, but it worked. See me. Nah, it's semen. It's semen. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A lot of protein on the bench. He rubs it in. That's right. It's-- this is 33 right here, Mikey. I'm sorry. There's nothing I can do about it, OK? College kit. They ask me if I-- I was like, are you late to class? And I was like, no, no, no. Aren't you in my polysine class? I'm going to shoot a podcast. Yeah. I'll be there later. I'll be there later. I'll be there later. All right. Next up, I'm going to ask you about Black Snake Mone. Yeah. Samuel Jackson. Yeah. Christina Ricci. Jimbo. Yeah. How was that? It's awesome. It was like my first big, like, kind of big job in Hollywood with Black Snake Mone, you know? Yeah, man, and it was John Singleton, was the executive producer of that. And I met him in Memphis. And I met John in the makeup trailer. And he had just finished this film called "Four Brothers," right, which was with Mark Wahlberg. And it was based in Detroit. But being from the area, like, I watched it. I was like, that's not Detroit. And that's 100% somewhere else, you know? And so I asked him. I was like, why didn't you shoot that in Detroit? He said, man, you know, I scouted the city. And it's beautiful, like, that kind of urban decay. Like, it just really shoots well for what we're trying to do. But we couldn't get anybody to guarantee our safety. No shit. That's where you're sending my man out tonight. Well, we don't care if he lives or dies. Yeah, that's true. He's expendable. Yeah. He's expendable. And that's the thing about having a company where you're like, OK, your as an employee is that if they die, they die. If they die, they die, yeah. And you're like, Ivan Drogo. Exactly. It was like, Georgia, if he died, he died. Now it's scary, if he dies, he dies. But to be fair, I want to say this for all my Detroit people listening. Detroit is having a massive come up. The city has never been better. Well, I could argue the '40s and the '50s were pretty good for Detroit. But in the modern era, the city has really turned a corner. There's a lot happening in Detroit. It's very, very exciting. I'm proud of Detroit. I'm proud to be from Detroit. And I think he's going to have a good time tonight. He'll be all right. Yeah, I think it'll be fine. I know the owner of the Cavaliers, it's the guy who owns the Cavaliers. Dang it, so he's pretty much taking control of Detroit. That's right. He's redoing it and everything else. And then they were giving away houses. You remember that for $5,000 apiece? They were giving away. Some guy in Detroit gave away his house. He traded it for an iPhone 6. Didn't even have to be the 6S or whatever it was. You know what I mean? Just give me the iPhone 6. You can have the house. Nobody's doing that anymore though. The Corpton neighborhood is like-- it's like what Williamsburg was 20 years ago. You know what I mean, it's like re-emerging as this artist hobbed. The foreign motor company just redid the Michigan Central train station, which was a symbol of kind of bourbon blight for years. And now it's like this shining star, right? I'm the southwest side of Detroit. It's amazing. That's wild, man. Yeah, man. Because we flew in and that immediately drove out here late last night. I had a bunch of accounts to go to and all that other stuff. So I didn't get to spend any time there. And you know, you hear stories, but they're stories. And it's like, OK, cool. My wife's best friend ended up buying one of those houses for five grand. Is that right? Yeah. So she moved out there with a military boyfriend, and was just like, OK, cool, we're going to do this and give this a go. They said they were ripping out copper wire and shit every fucking two weeks. Yeah. So they lasted about six months, and then that was all done. That was it. Yeah, yeah. They were checked out of there, but that was-- I was doing a movie-- Well, five or six years ago. I was doing a movie, man, about 10 years ago. I forget what it was, but I was in the makeup trailer like day two, day three, or whatever. And the makeup artist found out I was from Detroit, and she goes, oh, you're from Detroit? I just did a movie out there. And I was like, oh, really, how was it? She goes, we didn't like the hotel that we were put in. So me and four other below the line people on the film, we pulled our per diem and we bought a house. No shit. But they're fucking per diem. Like that found money in your pocket. You know what I mean? They just kept the house for the run of the show. Then they got rid of it. You know what I mean? They held down to it for a little while, but it cost them nothing. Yeah. You know? Yeah. What a weird situation. So wild, dude. Yeah. Because like, I'm from Atlanta, originally. We were just there. And like, that downtown has never really changed. I mean, they added some shit for the Olympics, but like every time we go there, I don't dig it. Yeah. No, it sucks there. Yeah. Like everything's up in Buckhead now. I love living down on Crog Street, like just off of Edgewood Avenue. Like there was Cabbage Town was on one side. And it's like little five points in Old Fourth Ward, or whatever. Crog Street market across. I did a show there for like six months. And it was I was staying at Crawford. He used to drive over from Valley's in Midtown now. He's in Midtown now. Yeah. Yeah. It's nice over there. It's not bad. No, it's not bad. You're well-beautiful now. Yeah. You know, beautiful high-rise and all that stuff. He's doing chat powers on Hulu right now. Yeah, that's right. Yeah. So they're down there filming. We were with him last weekend. And then you're rapping this, right? What do you have after this? You got anything lined up? Yeah. So I was supposed to do this little film right-- like literally right after Godfather, which would have meant that I'd be in Pennsylvania shooting and not be able to do this. But the script wasn't 100% right. We want to take the budget up a little bit more. So we're looking for some more money. So we punt it to the spring. We'll shoot it in the spring. And so now I'm just winning September 17th. I start. I go back to FBI most wanted and do three more episodes on that. Three, four, whatever. I don't know. I did three episodes of it before the season of Godfather. David Hutchins is the showrunner. And he was the showrunner of the show I did in Atlanta. And he calls me every year. He's like, you want to come by and do an arc. I usually can. I don't have the schedule. Sure. But this year after the strike, I was like, you know what? I'll figure it out. I'll make some room. I will figure it out. I will get down there. I won't bug you about the words. I'll say whatever you want me to stand. I'll say whatever you want me to say, we'll figure it out. So I'm going to go back and do a few more episodes of that. I started September 17th. This is great. We'll shoot to New York, which is right around the corner from where I live. Yeah. And I'll have to travel far away from the kids, you know? That rocks. Yeah, it's great. That's nice. I'm going to keep going through the catalog today, by the way. OK. All right. Jack Reacher. Yeah. How was TC? How was Tom Cruise? Awesome. Was it? Did I never tell you the story when I met Tom? All right, so I was in Atlanta shooting the Walking Dead. And I get the offer to do Jack Reacher. And they want me to Skype with the director. So I jump on Chris McQuarrie in my head of him. So I Skype with Chris and he says, hey, listen, when you rap, can you come up to Pittsburgh, meet with Hair Makeup, wardrobe, meet with Transpo, pick out the vehicle. You think your character would drive. You know, even very, like, collaborative, you know? And I said, yeah, man, sure. So I rap on Walking Dead, flat to Pittsburgh. I'm there. I land at the hotel. And I get a phone call from my agents. And they say, hey, there's a dinner tonight in Pittsburgh with all the executives, some of the actors that are in town for the table read. And they want to invite you. And I was like, yeah, cool. I got nothing else to do in Pittsburgh tonight. So sure. So I figured what I'll do is I'll go, like, 20 minutes late. Yeah. Did I mean, like, I don't want to be the fucking first actor there with all these executives and shit. It's a little embarrassing the story. So, like, I show up, time is late, and I'm the fucking only after that, like, the only one. I'm like, god damn it. So I get a drink, all these executives that I've never met are milling around, shooting the shit. I'm staring at my shoes like I'm at a funeral and don't know anybody except the deceased or, you know what I mean? And these people start coming up to me. They're like, hey, how you doing? I'm Brad from the marketing team. We're so excited you're here. You're like, hey, hey, all right, Brad, thanks, man. Appreciate it. You know, like, I'm Mark. I'm with the accounting team at Paramount. And this is very exciting for me, you know? It's very awesome. And you're like, cool man. Once I meet in the mail, Mark, yeah. So while this is happening, Tom Cruise comes marching in with his married Katie Holmes at the time. Like, they're together. He has a security detail that peels off with military precision. You know what I mean, like, they check out the room. They're all-- I mean, it's my people. I counted six, there was probably 25, though. You know what I mean, like, Jesus Christ. I'm just saying, these guys are ninjas. They just-- they were in the air ducts, I'm sure. Snipers across the-- you know what I mean? Like, these guys walk in, military precision, fan out, create a perimeter. Tom Cruise locks eyes with me. And he just marches up with his handout. And I have his mom, like, Tom Cruise is walking towards me. What do I do? You know what I mean? You got to kiss him. Give up? You got to kiss him. I think that. Yeah, what was that your first thought? Open mouth kiss? Yeah, I did. I was like, or do I take my pants off and just start the revolution right now? You know what I mean? But so he walks up to me, and he goes-- put his hand on, he goes, hey, how you doing? I'm Tom, I'm a big fan. And I'm like, all right, dude, first of all, I know who you are, right? Yeah. You have to-- it's like, OK, Tom, I got it. But that was like, second of all, big fan. Thank you, but really? And he goes, dude, I'm a producer on this movie. If you think I haven't seen every single thing you've ever put on tape, you're out of your mind. And I was like, whoa. No way, yeah. He's that intense in real life, just like he is in the films, right? And I was like, wow, I was like, dude, that's really-- thank you. I was like, that means a lot, you know? And he's like, I tell you what, it must be a great film. Great film. Great film, you know? [LAUGHTER] That's the time, man. And I said, yeah, I was like, yeah, I did it. I'm so excited. It's the end, it's going to be great. He goes, we got a great cast. I mean, look, it's me and you, it's Rosamund Pike and Richard Jenkins. And I was like, yeah, I'm equal to Bobby DeValle. Jai Courtney, what's up? Jai Courtney. Jai Courtney. Yeah. Werner Herzog, who's a fucking legend. I got really close with Werner on the film. But I'm sure Robert DeValle and Bobby DeValle. Yeah, and I go, I have my mind blanked out for seconds. I'm like, I'm having this like, buddy buddy conversation with Tom Cruise all of a sudden, completely unexpected. I came to dinner, I don't know, Tom is going to be, you know, whatever, I didn't know he was going to be a fan, right? And I just, my mind blanked and I was like, dude, am I fucking crazy or like, have you worked with Robert DeValle before, right? He goes, yeah, yeah, we did a thunder. We did a two years ago called Days of Thunder. And I was like, fuck it, of course. And I was like, god damn it. Of course you didn't like, and I was so embarrassed that I didn't have total recall of that film at that moment. I swear to god, I turn around and when I turn back to Tom, I just out of nowhere, damn, I started giving him Robert DeValle lines from the film, Days of Thunder. I may be the proof to him that I hadn't seen it, but I was like, come on, I want you to go out there and hit the pace call. And he goes, what? I go, hit the pace call, I haven't got damn thing on that track. I want you to be perfect. So then Tom Cruise starts giving me cold trickle lines back to Robert DeValle now played by me, right? And all these, all these executives are now turning and they're watching us thankfully, Tom took it to the end of the joke and then back slapping, knee slapping, that intense laugh that he has got me out of it. He gave me his off landing, thankfully. But it was fucking wild, dude. It's the one that you're coming out of my mouth, like, why? Why am I saying this right now? Because you get locked in. You get locked in. I told this story on, you know, this show "Roth patch" from Revolution was, but I got to meet him one time, right? And, well, there was a second occasion, which I'll get to, but on the first one, we have the same publicist, same company and everything. I just had my first lead in the movie. And they were asking me to go to the MTV Movie Awards. To promote it and do the interviews on the right carpet and everything else and blah, blah, blah. I get to the seats. My publicist is like, hey, Tom Cruise wants to meet you. And I was like, what? And I'm like, there's no way. Show him in. I go there. There's no way. And so, but we're in the seats at this point. Show's about to start in like 15 minutes. There's a timer, like, you know, up on the stage. So you know, like, because it's live. And so you know what's going to happen. And I was like, well, fuck does he want to talk to me about? And he goes, man, he's just excited to get your first lead in the movie. And he just wants to say congratulations. And I'm like, so he comes over and you know that the entire auditorium and everybody's staring at you. Right. Like, you're locked in. You're like, oh, shit. Right. This is-- and I'm nervous as fuck. Same as you. Right. You're like, right. What do you say? And he's like, for whatever reason, he is the ability to lock in. Like, he's known you for 30 fucking years. 100%. And the way he focuses and talks to you without looking at anyone else, he makes you feel like you're the most important person in the world. Yeah. And there's something electric about that guy where you're like, man, I felt like I could run through the fucking wall. Like, a hundred percent, man. Look, he is a professional movie star. Yes. Do you know what I mean? Yep. Like, he's not just an actor. He is an actor. He's a great character when he loves me. But he's a professional movie star. I'm like, like, anything we've seen. Do you know what I mean? Oh, I agree. I agree. And so gracious and so kind. I was on the holiday cake list for like seven years. I would get the cake. No way. Yeah. I got the cake for like-- Everybody's talked about the cake. You got the cake? Yeah. You got the coconut cake. The thing that's good is-- Was outstanding. Although, sorry, Tom. I left it two years in a row. I left it on the counter. My dog back at eight. Like, a half of it. Just like up there, paws up, smashed half the cake. What kind of dog? He's like, he's a mitts-pity lab. Maybe some Husky. We don't know. Get on the man, like, just as sweetie, though. Life's cake. What's up? He likes cake. And fucking loves it. Big fan. If well, if it comes from Tom Cruise, you love it. Yeah, maybe that's it. Yeah, maybe that's it. Maybe it's Tom Cruise cake. Is he eating any other cakes? I don't think he's ever ate another cake. He's eating a lot of cheese wheels. It's Tom Cruise. It's Tom Cruise. It's Tom Cruise. Kids, we got some sponsors to put this shit wagging on the air. First and foremost, go to spit.com/drinkingbroze. 50% off. 50% off. Every single item in the entire store, finest mattresses in the land, all of their products are made in the good old US of A, talking about the ghost bed, right there. Mattresses, sheets, pillows, adjustable bases. You name it, they got it. Over at ghostbed.com/drinkingbroze. They've also got weighted blankets, mattresses for RVs. All the fun stuff over there. Now it's all 50% off. Probably stay like that through the election. 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We don't eat the way we need to a workout, the way we need to on a daily basis, but it is important to get the proper vitamins inside of us. Also love their liver detox over there. That's for my Mondays. Dan, they were built though on protein. Protein, yeah. What are you taking these days from them? For my workout, I take formula one, pH. It's all protein. After my workout, and then again, later in the day, if I need a boost, protein boost, I'll take the level one, which is more of a meal replacement. It's got fat, carbs and shit in it, but they got the best protein on the market. It's not even close. Yeah, dude. Best in the biz, tons of great flavors over there. Love their level one bars as well. Energy drinks are fucking bomb, dude. All their products are amazing, dude. Head on over to firstform.com/drinkinbros today. We're gonna get free shipping on orders of $75 over there, and it's spelled with a one. So it's one STPH, O-R-M firstform.com/drinkinbros. Next up, we got ExpressVPN.com/drinkinbros. So I just heard something mind-blowing. Netflix has more than 18,000 titles globally, but only like 6,000 of those are available in the United States. So you're missing out on like 12,000 other shows that you could get ahold of unless you use ExpressVPN. Change your VPN, dude, to one of their countries and look at all their shit. It's great. I was unaware that the number was that high, though. Jesus, man, it's amazing what's out there, and let's face it, we're living in a world now where they're not making TV anymore, not making hardly any good shows, handful of movies here and there. We all need content. We all gotta watch something at the end of the night, dude, and we're looking for stuff. ExpressVPN will help you get there. Netflix hides content from you based on your location. ExpressVPN lets you change your online location so you can control where you want the Netflix to think you're located. 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It makes you feel great and you can really fucking lock in. So I take it before I do the podcast or from writing or something like that or if we're on the road. It'll get you going, dude, for three or four hours and keep your locked in. So big fan, plus a bunch of people in the Olympics, use it. DoD's working with these guys and investing in the company itself for troops overseas. They've also got a partnership with the Tour de France. Save 30% off your first subscription order and receive a free six-pack of ketone IQ with ketone.com/drinkandbros. That is ketone.com/drinkandbros to save 30% off your first subscription order and receive a free six-pack of those little bottles of ketone IQ. The other time I saw him, by the way, back to your movie star shit, where I'm doing a screen test for a movie at Paramount and we're outside, it's a beautiful day in LA. There's only like four of us. When was this, by the way, this was like 2000? It was mission impossible, too. So I was going to say like 0304 or whatever it was. Was that the one with Phil Hoffman or was that three? You know what? I forget. To me, all those movies went together. He's the one where he's got long hair. He's driving a fucking motorcycle. Yes, right. Three years from where he's driving a motorcycle. Yeah. Is he running in the rain? Nine in the desert. Oh, the desert. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And so at that point, I think it was the M for murder movie with Sandra Bullish. So it was like me, Ryan Gosling. And Jacob Pitt and somebody else, like, whatever, two out of four of us got the movie. Right. I'm one of the two, obviously. But they go, hey, guys, we're going to need you to be quiet for a sec. We got to bring out-- because there's a trailer right in front of us. Right. We got to bring out somebody, whatever, like he just quiet down for us. I was like, yeah, sure what's going on. And Tom Cruise walks out of the trailer. And he goes, play the fucking music. And there's a DJ on Paramount who played the Mission Impossible theme song. And it blared all throughout the lot. And that's how he walked into set. And he's just giving everybody the fives, like, all the crew high fives, knew all their names, their kids, everything. And he goes, have a great day, everybody. And I was like, god damn, that's a movie star. And the four of us are sitting there and chairs like this, just board chairs outside of a casting office. And we're like, holy shit, we'll never be a movie star like Tom Cruise. I mean, he just absolutely dominates. Dominates. He just wakes up and crushes it, man. And I noticed that, too, where he knows everybody's name. And I try to emulate that, like, on any job I do. You know what I mean? We're all trying to tell a story, man. You know what I mean? We're all pulling in the same direction, hopefully, just because you're towards the top of a call. She doesn't mean you need to be a cunt. You know what I mean? So I really appreciate that about Tom. And by the way, it should be said, never a word about the religion. Never came up. Yeah. Never came up. There's no Dianetics fucking, you know, whatever, kiosk with a guy. Nothing like that. No. That's not a thing. That's a myth. I don't know where that came from, but that was never a thing. He would just hate on anybody that's successful. Like everybody called him crazy when he's jumping up on the couch, talking about how SSRIs are bad for you. Right. It's like, yeah, they're bad for you. Right. What the fuck are you talking about? Like every mass shooter is on fucking some kind of pill. Right. We're making people crazy. And the guy that everybody thought was crazy was the only one talking about it. Right. The fuck. No, it's true, man. Like, I agree. If you're at the top, people are going to find some little thing that, you know, I don't know, tear you down a little bit. Yeah. But he's shooting two of those. Not too bad. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. Don't hear what I like it. Yeah. It's all my choice, Ross. It's not. You're one of those guys. No lie. Like, I was like, hey, and I've said this on show multiple times, I'm like, that dude could win two or three Oscars if just given the right material. Yeah. Because you're old school, New York. Like even when you're not doing shit, like you were in plays and everything else. There was a, there was a time where, as I called Clay, and I was like, hey, do invite Mikey out or whatever. And he goes, I was doing this, uh, New York after studio. Yeah. Are you part of that? Yeah. I'm a lifetime member of the studio. Yeah. Yeah, the after studio. I love it. I love it. It's, look, this is a collaborative art form, but I do. You know what I mean? And it's, it's, I'm not a painter. I'm not a writer. I can't do it by myself. I got to be around other people that want to do it at a high level too. Right? And so it's a gym. It's a space for me to go and work out, try things, fail, figure it out. You know what I mean? Like, play the things that I'll never get hired to play in Hollywood. I'll go do that over at the studio and scratch those, you know, scratch that itch and maybe work, work my way into that somehow. Do you know what I mean? Well, you're the only one that I know who in the off season, you know, and we'll say that as a football reference today, right? Who's still training? Right. It's like, okay, cool. And then when he called me, I was like, should I feel like shit, I'm not in fucking class today? Like, God damn, you know he got into class after that. And it really? Oh, he sure did. Out of boy. Yeah. And it was because of you. And I got it. All right. Well, you know, I've noticed your difference in his work. Yeah. He's like, it's because of you, and he's doing great. Probably is. No, no, no. Crawford's a fucking badass, man. I love that, dude. What was something that you did that you thought was going to blow up and then didn't? I did a pilot with David Milch called last of the night, and I was about crooked cops in New York in the 70s, and I was like, man, and I did this two days after I wrapped shooting True Blood. True Blood hadn't come out yet. I was like, no one's going to really watch the vampire thing. Nobody cares. You know? Yeah. That's not a thing people are into. It shows how much I know. But I was like, this thing with Milch, crooked cops, it's like sopranos with badges. It was fucking outstanding. And David Milch. Yeah. You know. Classic. Coming off of Deadwood. Yeah. But it just didn't work. It's just like, there was so many things wrong I wanted to go into, but it didn't even get picked up. And I was like, this is what I'm going to be known for. And then Terry's. When we were shooting, Terry was like, this is, this is, and it is, I don't care where anybody says the critics adored it, it was a special show, and anybody who watches it loves it. It just didn't get enough eyeballs, because it was marketed really weird at FX at a time when Sons of Anarchy was their sort of, you know, their benchmark, and they had an audience that just wasn't interested in what was being marketed to them called the show called Terry's about two news, they didn't know what it was about. But I feel like if that show came out five years later, it would have been, it would have been a massive hit. I agree. You know. I agree. What's something looking back on, I mean, your career, I'm going to go into Paul Revere with Sons of Liberty. Yeah. Was that something that you were like, holy shit, I'm playing Paul Revere? Yeah. Totally. And you know what I found out about Paul Revere is, is that this guy over here was wearing the green dragon tavern t-shirt, which is where the Sons of Liberty used to hang out in the north end of Boston, by the way. I read these letters that Paul Revere had written when I was doing research. So Paul Revere, just a quick backstory, like he was kind of a street guy, right, in Boston at this time. He didn't go to Harvard, like the John Hancock's and the Sam Adams and the John Adams. He wasn't, he wasn't educated that way, he was educated on the streets. He was kind of one of the first to think of himself as an artisan and a gentleman at the same time without being ironic. You know what I mean? Like, he kind of invented the American alpha male, right? And I read these letters that he wrote and he fucking, he didn't know how to spell correctly. So he would spell things phonetically and he would write words in a fucking Boston towney accent. Really? I spelled charter, charter. His mother's maiden name was Hichborn and when he wrote her name, it was Hichborn. It was, it was, he had a fucking thick Boston towney accent, so I was like, I'm leaning into that. It's good. Good will fucking hunting in the woods, you know what I mean, my horseback. What if by land motherfuckers, you know. So yeah, man, that was a fucking blast and we shot that in fucking Romania for five months. That was in Romania? It was in Romania. Damn. And then when we wrapped the head of go to Boston to shoot a, that movie, the finest hours, which was, I just had like a little Boston year, but yeah, Romania, Bucharest Romania, we shot that. What was the reaction to the son's liberty? I mean, to be honest, I didn't pay a ton of attention to it. Like, I know it did well, they played every 4th of July, they promoted the hell out of it. I think it did well numbers wise. The critics were kind of up and down, I read one critic and then I sat right in anymore because this fucking idiot person, I won't even gender this person, this fucking moron was like, what is what is Michael Raymond James doing with this modern Boston accent in a time where everybody basically spoke like they were from England and I was like, dude, you're your fucking mind, let's just think about this for two seconds, right? We're talking about 100 plus years since the landing of the Mayflower, the pilgrims, all that shit, right? Less than 50 years after that, we have the Civil War, right? We accept that there's 19,000 Southern dialects at this point, do you know what I mean? So in the first 100 years, everybody spoke like they're from fucking Sussex. Yeah. You know what I mean? And then now 50 years later, we all have these American dialects, you're out of your fucking mind, you're an idiot. You know what I mean? So then I just quit reading the reviews and so I have no idea, but yeah, it's hard. He reads the comments. I don't read the comments. I read all of them. You do? Why do you like being mad though? Look at your face. You love it. I don't. It's not that I like it or don't. I just am. You know what I mean? But I read them in case of something funny in there, right? I don't like you can't hurt my feelings like like what happens if I tickle you right now? I'm not tickling. No, no, of course not. But if you say something super fucked up, I'll smile maybe or I'll smirk it maybe. Right. That's the best you're going to get. That's not even a smile. But I do enjoy it. Yeah. What's up fucked up happens? That's that's what I like. Like if somebody were to blow their brains out in front of a fucking hotel desk manager who has no idea what they're doing, right? Oh, yeah. That's funny. I don't think about that all the time, but the only because everybody asked that and they're like the biggest times I've seen him happy is in a is a true story in a fucking stadium on on somebody's home field when the visiting team wins and there's a hundred thousand people he reverse green miles that he sucks in all their misery and then he makes him happy. Imagine. Yeah. Yeah. And even his own school. So he went to Penn State. Yeah, we are. Okay. We're here. We are. We are in Penn State game. Right. It's a white out. I'm the only one wearing red in the whole stadium, essentially, right? And even though it's his own school, Ohio State is down by twenty one men when we leave the house, it's phone, wallet, keys, how's my hair look? But if you're experiencing hair loss, you may not be so confident when you step outside your door. It's time to get that confidence back and restore your hair with hymns. No man wants to lose his hair, but for men, it's actually very common. 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And I look over and he's just, he was home. He'd been safe. That's your happy place, man. I love it. I like to experience the spectrum of human emotion, you know what I mean? Everybody's always... But you hold it in. You hold... I don't... It's not that I hold it in. Or the spectrum up to this point. Beyond that, like, the happy side, we're kind of... It's not that I hold it in. I just don't experience the world the way everybody else does. But I like... you see people pretending to be happy all the time, and to see that moment of realism is nice for me. I like that. You're into like unadulterated honesty. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Nothing's more honest than a broken heart. We get your fucking nuts smashed in a fucking vice with a sledgehammer with two seconds left in the game. That's the best. It's over. It's... Even last night. That counts last night, obviously we're giving out half t-shirts, all that other stuff, right? And so I'm going down the accounts. Last bar that I stopped in was called the Blue Lapper Con next door to the Brown Jug. That's right. And it rocks. We'll go there tonight. Have you been there? Just about ten minutes before we got here. Me and Shit were over there. Did you guys go downstairs? No. No, no, no. Downstairs? There's a disco ball dance for... I mean, a beer ball and everything else. And I was like, "Oh shit." Right. I didn't know that existed. Right. So I go there last night. I come back up to the bar. It's packed. It's a Chiefs game last night. Right. Comes down to the last play. Chiefs Ravens, yeah. Did you watch it? Yeah. Toe goes out of bounds. I know. Zero seconds on the clock. That's right. Everybody who would bet the Chiefs, because everybody's gambling now, we're all going bug fuck. Everybody else is miserable and it's the best. I think... You'll probably talk about this with Shay, but I think Shay took the... Hey Shay, you took the under? Yeah. You took the under which was 46 and a half and it was 47. I was like, "This is the end of the fucking score and these cocksuckers are going to fuck me right in the ass." Oh, and we'll have y'all an absence to talk about it, because I want to get wet with that. One of our sponsors is MyBookie.com. Let's go. We'll go into it, but even watching that last night, opening game of NFL, I was like, "We're back. We're back." And it was like football season is the fucking best, man. The greatest. It's the best. It's the greatest. For you, I know you're a die-hard Michigan fan. That's right. Go Blue. That's right. Last year. Congratulations on that. Thank you very much. Did you watch the Connor Stallions. We got lists are screaming out, asterisk. What the fuck? No, no, no, no. Let's go. Let's go. What are you talking about? What are you talking about? Yeah. What are you talking about? You can't even point to a rule that... Look, I think my thing with Connor is this, is what he was doing was unnecessary. And that was proven when he got sent home. He got sent away, and we still kept beating the shit out of everybody. Right. And... But there is no rule. There's no rule. There's no rule. The rule in the NCAA says that a coaching staff can't be present at a future of bonus game to advance golf. Correct. It doesn't say you can't send a kid who goes to that school 50 bucks in a ticket and have him shoot his iPhone at the... And by the way, what's that footage look like? You think that's better than the all 22 footage or the TV footage that these guys will have access to? But also, apparently it's not a problem for coaches to communicate to each other. Hey, I heard you guys just played Purdue last week. What did you learn? What do the signals look like? Here, we'll send you everything we got. Good luck. Right? That's not a problem. So you're talking about professionals. That's not a problem. There's a problem to send some drunk sophomore to hold his fucking iPhone. You know, what's that footage even fucking look like? Good bullshit. I don't give a fuck. They were going to win either way. We're going to win? That's what I think. Exactly. 100%. They proved it the second half of the season and even on our way to early prediction show on college football, a big Michigan win before the season started because I thought they had the best defense. What a legend. They had a great one game. And that takes a lot for you. My man, you used to call me every year for many years after the last Saturday in November. There was a lot of them, you know, I would get these phone calls from Ross and I would just weed it. I'm like, I'm not answering that phone. I would get the voicemail, Mikey. I know you're hurting right now. This is your friend Ross. I just want you to know about it even though your football team sucks. I love you. I think you're terrific. You're a great talent. Yeah. Shit like that. It just made me feel worse. You know what I mean? I'm so glad the last few years I've been able to call Ross. Yeah. Yeah. And the second the game is over. Yeah. The text message lights up and I know. I know it is. You know it is. I know exactly what it is. And the beauty of it is I've never told you this until now. He's claimed something. He goes, uh, he goes, Hey man, so Mikey doesn't know what to make here your phone messages. Because I'll all do the same thing today on the show. I'll be like, Hey, I love you. Okay. I love you son of a bitch. One of my favorite people in this life and I love you and I just want you to know that. And the two of you guys get uncomfortable with that. Right. You don't want to hear another man telling you, I love you. Stop. Stop. This is clean. Tell me. I started leaving more messages. You did. Is that what it happened? Is this intentional? Like because it was like out of there would be in June. Yep. Yeah. Totally out of blue. Yeah. And I'll do it. There's like a list of like 10 people and I'll leave these messages. I know they're not going to pick up and I know they're going to play it later. And be like, What the fuck is going on? Yeah. Is Ross fucking with me right now? Is he going to flow his brains out like, Well, because you know, because I know you would do that for a joke. Yes. You know what I mean? Like, I know that that's like 100% within the realm of possibility like, you know what would be fucking hilarious? If I said my get his message and blew my fucking brains out, get it. Great. Yeah. Absolutely great. I mean, like, okay, cool man. Right. So, you know, yeah, I get a little confused. I get very confused. I get very conflicted Ross. Like, I don't know how I'm supposed to feel like, is he fucking with me? Should I feel happy that he says that or is it like, do I need to call somebody to do a wellness check? No, I love it. Look at this. I've got a nice hand on his shoulder. He loves it. I couldn't feel it. Yeah. No, he loves it. Don't even say. Look at him. Look at Danny. He loves it right down on the inside. And I say, Hey, I just want you to know this. Okay. Okay. Something happens. I texted you guys the tickets before I got on the plane and I said, Hey, just in case I die in a plane crash. I know. And I sent you back. Like don't put that juju out into the world. I don't want to get it. There's nothing to do about it. However, though, since you brought it up, I'd love a case of this because I don't pay retail. You know what I mean? Of course. Of course. I'll bring it back to the hotel free for those who are going to phone it. I'm going to leave it being expensive for those who can't bring it back to the hotel before Shay comes on here. Yeah. Predictions on the game. Who do you got? Well, listen, I can't pick against Michigan, but I do think it's going to be I'm nervous as hell. It's going to be tough. It's going to be a tough game. But in this new era of college football, the one last doesn't ruin your season. No. Do you know what I mean? So, you know, it's still possible both teams wind up in the playoffs. I think that it's going to be tough sledding from Michigan. If they turn the ball over once, I think it's over. I think it's game over. They need to protect the football. They need to control the time of possession. They need to run the ball, pound the rock with Killel Mullings, get Donovan Edwards involved and something exciting, something he's got to get in the ball in space, not don't run them through the tackles, and you're going to have to hit Colston Loveland, match him up and mix matches with linebackers or nickel corners, feed him the rock. They got to control the clock, limit what Texas can do on offense. And if they can do that, then they have a chance. They basically got to be Boston College against Florida State. Do you know what I mean? They have to do, they have to have that game plan, you know, or Georgia Tech versus Florida State or Georgia or anybody versus Florida State this year. Yeah. How about that? Week one, they got two losses. Called both of them. Money line. Both of them. Did you really? Yeah, yeah. We hate DJ Ukulele. So, like, sucks. He's the worst. He's the worst. He's the worst. He's a great kid, though. I'm good to win football games. Yeah. That's just very true. And then the winner thing for me is, I don't even know. The winner thing for me is, for you guys, I watched Alex Orgy play last year. Right. And he's got a limited time against Ohio State and then play offs in the National Championship. He looks great. Why is he not your starting quarterback this year? Well, I mean, he's one of the best 11 athletes on offense, so he's going to be involved in the game plan. They're going to have packages for him, right? He's more of an athlete than he is a quarterback. I mean, he's a big dude, diesel, runs fast. You know, and he has an arm. He can make all the throws, but that's not just what a quarterback does. A quarterback has to throw in rhythm, throw on time. He has to read defenses, and I'm sure he can do all of those things, but he maybe can't do it as well as Davis Warren can at this point. Davis Warren is used to kicking ass. The kid had fucking leukemia. He was a four-star recruit, and then he got leukemia, had to give up football for a little bit to cancer's ass, which he did, and then he walked on it, Michigan, and he's earned his spot. I think it's going to be a platoon. I think you're going to see both guys involved tomorrow. I also think that, you know, against Fresno State, they didn't open up the playbook past page two. I think tomorrow you're going to see some more diversity in play-calling, some more exotic packages, some more, you see a lot more motion, a lot more, you know, we're trying to scheme guys open, because that's what they're going to have to do. Otherwise, they don't have a chance, you know? And for me, you know, we're spread, guys, so we cover the spreads. Before, the week before you guys played Fresno State, they already had this spread out for Texas. It was three and three and a half, now it's seven and a half, seven and a half. You know, let me just say this about spreads, and Connor Stallions. Once the whole story broke and Connor Stallions resigned, fired, whatever. The Vegas lines for future Michigan opponents, they didn't change. Real, they didn't change at all, because Vegas knows it was bullshit, because it was all bullshit. Everybody's trading tapes. Everybody has a guy who still signs it, when I played high school football, we would change our signs up week to week, because people were still assigned. Sure. You see coaches, you see pitchers with their fucking gloves on the fucking face. They did on your liberators, you know what I mean? Anyway, that's a lot of points for a home team. It is. That's a lot of points. Seven and a half is a lot. And that's a lot. I mean, so you're saying Texas would win by what 11 on a neutral field? That's a big spread. This game is so hard at handicap, though, I think, because I don't think last week told us very much about either team. Do you know what I mean? I don't say it wasn't in a challenge, Texas, right? Fresno State, I think Michigan held, and I'm sure Texas did too, they don't want to put too much on tape for Michigan, for Wick Martindale to kind of break down and figure out. Right? So it's so hard, and this is almost like a week one, you know? I think it's a lot. I'm a Michigan guy. I don't bet Michigan ever, although last year, and it kills me, I called Shane before the season, because I saw Michigan on Fandour or whatever, plus 1,000 to win a national championship, and I was like, let me put 10 grand on that. Did you really? I did it, though. I did it. I was like, and I wish I had because it was $1,000 safe back, too, where I was like, they'll give you $1,000 in back, so it was a media aspect. Yeah, yeah. But we just had this strike, Ross, and I was, you know, and I got three kids. And my, you know, my wife's got smoke coming off that credit card, we're gonna win. So I'll get into real honesty with you here. I picked Michigan, bet Michigan, but now they allow you, like on my bookie, to cash out. So they're like, hey, oh, early, yeah, yeah, do you want to cash out early? Right. It was the national championship. But for Washington, you cash out before Washington, Washington, Washington destroyed Texas, and Pennx looks amazing, and I was like, man, I don't know that Michigan's offense is gonna be able to keep up with Washington's. I switched my bet that I had him for the whole year. Oh, my God. Why you at that point? You were committed. You got to let it rise. Dude, I just. So what'd you cash out with? I lost. I lost. I put it. I cash out. I put it all in Washington for the championship game. Oh, my God. I lost everything. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I lost all of it, dude, all of it. And it was like, I don't know, 18 grand or something like that. Oh, my God. That's a bad beat. Fucking brutal. I mean, for the season, though, like I'd done well. So like, by the end of the year, I'd broke even even with that, you know, even with that 18 grand hit. Yeah. And then luckily, I was able to turn around on the cheese. So right. Because that was that we were at the Super Bowl, and I turned it around, but it was fucking brutal. That's a bad beat. I mean, it's a cash out cash out. Take the money. You take the JJ McPher. Don't get mad. I'm throwing like 15 passes a game. Sounds like, eh, who cares. They make panic so goddamn uncomfortable, man, that defense was coming after him. He looks nervous. The whole scare. It was never comfortable. It was never comfortable. My fucking shitty Falcons with the eighth pick in the 2024 draft. I'm like, right after they pay Kirk Cousins. What? What? It makes no sense. Lost my shit. Lost my shit. But before Shay comes on, now's the point of the show, we get to the drinking bro of the week. Someone who has inspired you, helps you become the person you are today, who'd like to give the drink of bro of the week to. Oh, wow. I wish I had thought of this before. This sounds fucking, this is probably not I'm branded all for the show, but can I pick my kids? Yes. Absolutely. My kids fucking inspire the shit out of me, dude. They're like the very best thing about me, like all my best off and then all my wife's best stuff they got. The choices that they make, the way they go through, like the way they just, they're willing to give anything a shot, inspires the hell out of me, man. So I want to, I want to tip my cap to my, my kids, Marley Tristan, Kaya, I love you. That is going to be on soon. That's awesome. I got three as well. I got three as well. I know you do. I know. Yeah. And we got the same. Same kind of deal. Same style. Yeah, since you're juggling now. Yeah. And 33. And 33 with three. It's rough. It's rough out here in these streets. All right. We're going to bring in Shay from the Dan Patrick Show here in the second biggest stretch. Shay. It's better, man. Yeah. Shay in Irving is joining us today. Now look at you. First time on camera. Ever, man. Ever. Yeah. Ever. You're working with Dan Patrick. Yeah. You're our expert here this week. Let's face it. Yeah. You're here. Right. Do you gamble in real life? Yeah. Fuck yeah. Same. Absolutely. I mean I got a couple of guinea bookies in Connecticut. But then I got fandoll and draft kings too. Yep. But you know, you got to have the credit motherfuckers when you need it. So we don't have that in Texas. Texas still is illegal. Right. So ours is my bookie.com. Right. And from our co-drinking bros doubles that first deposit up to a thousand dollars. But we don't have that there and you know, with you guys, because you're able to do it on an app and your thing, right? Yeah. But same as you. Like I got my own bookie has a website on his own, you know, with his own paper play and all that other shit. So it's just as easy as fandoll. For a game like this, is it easier to pick or harder to pick for you? So preseason Texas spread was lane three and a half and I hit that. It's got fed up to seven, seven and a half in some spots, which I think it's a. It's a. Seven and a half on our site. There you go. Yeah. Seven and a half. I do do. But it's probably a three to seven point game. Although I could see Texas winning by two tucks down, so the Michigan defense is going to be good. It's legit. But here's the question. What's more likely, right? A close Texas win or Texas winning by double digits. And I think more likely is Texas winning by 13. I still think seven's heavy. I wouldn't hit seven. I wouldn't. I wouldn't hit Texas. I wouldn't lay seven on the fucking road at the big house. No. Are you saying that because you're a Texas fan? I mean, you got the Longhorn shit. You're decked out in and obviously I am, but I wouldn't as it as a Longhorn fan. I wouldn't bet. If I woke up today and I saw a line seven and a half, there's no way I'm laying that with Texas. No way. It's so much. That's too many road points for a blue blood team. I mean, Michigan doesn't have a quarterback, right, but they have a good D line. They have a great tight end and they have a good running back. So Quinn Evers is going to have to like play really fucking well because you know, Winky is going to blitz them. You know, Winky is bringing the fucking blitzes and if Quinn plays he leads, then Texas wins by 10. But if he has a bad game, good fucking luck. Yeah. Tomorrow is going to be beautiful. 65 to kick off. Yeah. Classic fall day, which is weird for us to say coming from Texas. Right. Because we all came up from Texas and it's going to be a classic college football match up. The only thing that's my gripe is it's new. That's so weird to me. They did the nooner and not the night game here. Yeah. I mean, I know it's on Fox. The Fox. Why the fuck is it at one? Because it's a big new kickoff. Right. That's why they did it. Right. So behind the scenes and we've had, you know, all those guys on the show before we did, you know, a charity event with Urban Liar and everybody else and they said those ratings going into the game itself is what elevates that show and they're trying to pass college game deck. Yeah. So they're putting these games on a noon. Yeah. However, as a fan and his podcast host, we kind of almost have to shoot the day before. Right. Because getting into these stadiums at six AM and then getting going and everything else, like it's a fucking mess. Right. It's an absolute mess. Something like this should be on client time. It should be the game of the week. Fuck yeah. Like I, especially this weekend, there's nothing else going on. No. Iowa, Iowa State. You got fucking. This one other game. Hang on. Let me find it. But not, not as big as this. Iowa, Iowa State's at three o'clock in your night game. Your big night game is going to be called right at a brass go. I mean, fuck me. Right. That's the way you got going on. It's like the fall of Dion Sanders, which, you know, Nebraska lay in seven, do it. The only other ranked matchup is Tennessee, NC State. Right. And who fucking cares about either one of those days. That's the seven 30 game, too, right? Right. Okay. It's a bump. This is the weekend that you actually spend time with your family. Like if you're degenerate, like this is the weekend, we're like, let's go double pick it. Don't fucking do that this weekend. You get a day with your wife. That's what you're doing. That's what you fucking doing. There's a race shit going on. You put some fucking, put some points in the bank right now so you can skip out later. Yeah, because it's, it's you drink all day news. Yeah. Pass out for a little bit. Take your wife out for a day and you're like, all right, cool. We're good to go. It's, you know, obviously Sunday football is coming up with the NFL. That's why you got to lay her down Saturday night. Give her a night. She can't forget. Wake up Sunday and just start fucking cooking breakfast for because you're busy all day Sunday. Well, get the fuck out of here. All day. How was Dan Patrick? Good dude, man. Good dude. I had him at dinner at the house. It was a big content, won't bone a contention where he wouldn't come over to my house. He didn't trust me or my family and I finally convinced him to come over. Really? Oh yeah. Yeah. Why? Well, I'm a degenerate. Ross, I am a, I'm a drug abuser, alcoholic degenerate, but I'll, I'll clean up my, my life a little bit. But he's a normal mother fucker, dude. Like he's a good solid father of four, just really good at being on the radio. Yeah. Just fantastic at interviewing, but besides that, he's just a normal dude. He's like, you were made like he's normal. Yeah. He's just a pro in his job. Hundred percent. But it's weird for us and I think just being a sports fan, we've watched him on TV for thirty fucking years now at this point, so he almost seems like this mythical dude. Totally. And then you wonder, all right, what's he like to work with on a daily basis and, you know, he's awesome. He's awesome. He's, he's really cool. He's really helpful. He's really taking his time, you know, I mean, the guy has mountains of fucking life advice when it comes to this, he's been in the business for a fucking minute for 40 years. Basically, dude's got advice to give and he's willing to spell that shit out for it. He's been really helpful. That's awesome. The good dude. Let's get into the NFL season tonight is Eagles versus Packers. It's in Brazil. It's the gang violence special. I was going to say, nobody can wear fucking green. So done. And they picked two of the five teams in the entire NFL who even have green in a fucking uniform. So my question is like, how many NFL like team assistants are getting arrested this weekend for buying horse from the Fovella or doing some two C to C like the, whatever the horse are doing now. It's like meth and MDMA mixed with cocaine. Yeah, it's good. Fantastic. Okay. You know, you know, yeah. Just fucking, no, no, take that up a balloon knot and then get weird. Yeah. Just boof it. They say, right. That's what the kids say. You know, you're balloon. No way. Oh, yeah. Right. The butthole. Where the shit comes out. Yeah. You know, it just kicks in. You see right away. Yeah. I've seen you. And no, somebody said you've seen an asshole before. Yeah, sure. Because we can get somebody to know. I know what a balloon. Oh, I'm just surprised they're taking up the asshole. 100%. It hits quicker and harder. No. Yes. Right. The balloon knot. Yeah. People are going to prison tonight. Well, you remember those secret service dicks got arrested down there because they were first. They won't be checked. Yeah. It was Columbia. Yeah. They wrote checks for the hookers first. Right. They wouldn't take checks. So they refused to pay them. So like five will go to the embassy. Yeah. Right. Yeah. The bill collectors showed up to the embassy. They were like, tell the secret service to pay this. What do you think that guy looked like? Five foot three, slick hair, gold teeth for sure. Yeah. Yeah. Grills. Everything else, man. It's a weird. For us. And we've chat about this on the show and I'm curious if you've chat about it on your show. The NFL is stretching out the product so far. Yeah. Will it be good by the end of the year? Yeah. I mean, we had the greatest opening games of all time last night. That was good. So we got lucky with that. But as far as a long season like this, sending these guys to Brazil, England, Germany, all that other shit. Let's go set these out too far. Yeah. I guess. But I don't like the Friday games. I don't like the Thursday games. Like I think a cheap is a product. Like historically, the last five years, you could name five times at Thursday night football was a good fucking game. The first Thursday night game of the year is usually okay. Yeah. And then the next eight are fucking terrible. Take the under. Take the fucking under. The next three and score. There's thumbles, there's penalties. They don't want to play on Thursday. Yeah. Like stop making them play on fucking Thursday. If you want a superior product, schedule it correctly. Yeah. They're just milking the fucking money tree right now. And Rogers, a 50 million dollar puppet for Jerry Jones and the rest of me, so whatever the fuck they tell them to do. And this is what they want. Well, because it's more ratings, more advertising dollars, more everything. I mean, I'm trying to eat up every night of the week, especially with gambling now everywhere. Like there, it's a money grab and they're grab it all. And I saw that they just, the NFL signed with Fandall. Yeah. But you got a Thursday night game this week, Friday night game, Sunday games all day. Yep. Monday. You have four days of the week right there that you're eating up. I don't like it. It's nuts. I don't like it. I think it cheap is a product. I really do. Who do you think wins it on the NFL this year? This is going to sound weird. I don't think it's the Cowboys. I don't think that's going to happen at all. I really like the fucking Lions. I think they're soft, but we'll see. I think that coach can instill some toughness real fucking quick in that team. I think those guys would go through a wall for Dan Campbell. So he's definitely a good coach. He fires him up. He's the opposite of soft. Right. I'm a huge man. He's not soft at all. No. I just think since he got there, the team has continued to play soft. The same with Miami. They got plenty of pieces. They just play soft. They still are soft for sure. I think Miami. And they lost Chris and Wilkins too. So they're going to be soft at the middle. They lost. They lost a lot of defensive on the fuckers. I don't trust Miami for shit. I love Detroit. They've gotten better every fucking year since Dan Campbell showed up. They went pretty well in the playoffs. They should have been saying for Cisco. 16% of all bats in Vegas are on Detroit. The favorite is K.C. Yeah, of course. So number two is Detroit. I like the Jets too. I come and say, I've got to fucking say it. Listen. Just hear me out. They have a trio. They have a great wide receiver, a great running back, and if that quarterback can keep his life together and not inject ayahuasca in the middle of the fucking season, they've got a good office and they've got a good defense. We all know they've got a good defense. Yes. Like, let's say this. Let's say this. Jets win 11 games. You see their schedule. It ain't that hard. They win 11 games and they host Miami around one of the playoffs. Who's winning that game? Jets are favored. Jets are favored. They're winning that fucking game. It happens at round two with Aaron Rodgers in the playoffs. I'll put my money on Aaron. That motherfucker is a machine. I don't think he's going to make it out of week one, and I know that's shitty to say. That's fair. But you're going against 49ers defense. They're incredible. Yeah. And he is, looks very gimpy in the preseason, and I don't know that as Achilles holds up. I think it's going to be a, he's out by halftime since. That was soft. I know. Well, what you'll see is, it's his left leg, it's his plant foot when he's leaning at the throat. He throws with his front foot a lot. You'll see a knee injury, if anything, then I don't think it'll be week one. It'll take a couple of weeks for the pressure to build up. Really? Yeah. It'll be, it'll be probably a PCL, MCL or something like that on his left leg. That's why I think. Because he's overcompensating or whatever the fuck. Yeah. That's, that's if he's not healthy. Who knows? Right. Who knows of that fucking guy to be honest. Nice. Love him, but who knows? Yeah. I agree. I agree. I agree with you and I think Ohio State is going to fold in the playoffs because I don't think that front seven is as good as everybody says. I don't think they're, I think they're dealing with songs. I do. I do. I do. The defensive line for Ohio State? Yes, I do. I think the best defensive in the country. Okay. I think when they go against SEC fat boys on the O line, I think they will. I think they will get it shoved in. I think they will get their shit pushed in. Because you know they got SEC guys on there. Yeah. Caleb Downs is on there. They got homies from the portal. I'm not worried about it. Everybody. This year. I'm telling you. I think Penn State beats him at the Whiteout game in about a month. Well look, I like the way Penn State looked last week. I think Penn State beats him. And I believe in Drew Larr. Like I said, hey, man, let's get this kid a year. I think he could be good. He looked great last week. We'll see if that carries over. The only problem is James Franklin. It's always been a problem. It's always been a problem. Yeah, he sucks. And I don't know if they've got the receivers, but the defense is top five. Yes. I mean, and they can run the ball and I think I'm telling you right now, I'm taking Penn State money line at home against Ohio State. Wow. I'm doing it. Okay. All right. I like it. Tomorrow. Who do you go with? I mean, I got South Bama. I got South Bama laying the two and a half against Ohio. I got the over 57 and a half there. I mean, this weekend is a week. Texas, Michigan. Who do you go? I got Texas minus three and a half preseason. I'm sitting on that. Oh, you are sitting on that. Okay. Got you. Got you. I talked about it on the show that I was taking Michigan plus three and a half when I thought Orgy was going to start. He did not start this year and so luckily, pulled it, popped it in on Texas. I think Texas wins by 10, 13 points. I think that's the most likely scenario and I think if they don't, they got a lot of answers. They got a lot of fucking questions answered. They don't win by 10. What do you do with your coach? Let's say you don't win again, the Sarks day. The start makes the playoffs these days. Yeah. Okay. For sure. He doesn't. I think the boosters going to start raising the fucking flag. The boosters will be very upset with them. They've given him a lot of money, a lot of resources. The NIL collective has been one of the most robust in the country. And if he can't get in the playoffs with that kind of fucking support. Somebody else can. I know. Right. He's ready, baby. What coach wouldn't want to come into a pro? No shit. Like Texas has got NIL money. They got the boosters. They got the backing. They get all the money in the world and then he got our arch manning next year. That's a sexy program for somebody like Urban Meyer. He was close. Urban would be so divorced and so fast and awesome. Oh my God. I mean, listen, Columbus is a great talent to get me wrong, but the amount of talent Austin versus Columbus. Urban would be beat. It's not even close. No, it's not even close. I mean, speaking of talent or the lack thereof, Michigan, yeah, it's kind of beat here. They got to figure something out, dude. It's a smart school. So you're going to see a lot of Asians here. You are. And I mean, look, we're seeing that a lot of schools we go to right now. Yeah. How was Illinois? Illinois was great. There was a lot of Asians there, but then we saw the sorority side of it and you're like, oh, okay, cool. That wasn't bad. Yeah. So that still exists. We'll find out when we go out tonight what it's really like. Yeah. You know, I was telling Mikey this earlier, I was checking on accounts for Hardy and Seltzer and all this other stuff and like the Asians that I saw going to class in the day, we're now at night. Right. So it was a different talent level and I was like, all right, maybe there's something here, but we'll see. I've been back to this university in 25 years, and yeah, yeah, it's been a long time. It's been a long time. But you're 33. So that was? I was eight years old. Right. Correct. No, I was in college. I was in college for Ohio State, Michigan. We came up to the away games, obviously. Sure, of course. And, you know, have you been in the stadium? No, never, dude. Never. I'm driven by it. And I'm never like, it's hard to explain that it's a fucking hole in the ground. Yes. Like you don't get that impression watching Michigan games on TV. No, I never did. Like, it's a fucking hole in the ground. It's a weird place. It's weird, which probably makes it a little bit louder, you would think. Yeah. So it's got to. It's a place to, it's a good place to have as your home field, for sure. Sure. It is. And when you walk in, so our seats tomorrow are, I think we're eight rows up on like the 15 yard line, right? I think it was so weird. It'll be, it'll be rad. But when you walk in, you're going to see there is no levels. Right. You're going to take it from seat one to one hundred fifty. You just fucking go down. You either go down or go all the way up. Wow. And that's, that's what the stadium is. And I'm looking at it now, obviously the pictures inside the ground just here. Right. You'll notice there is no sections there, so it kind of looks like Notre Dame in a lot of ways. I don't know if you've ever been there. I've been a Notre Dame. Yeah. There's a little bit more room to sit down in Michigan. Like Notre Dame, they made it for half people. Yeah. They show you in there. Do you ever sit there? Your, your guy said, what are you? Like six, two, or six, three? Six, four. Like, yeah. I'm kissing seats. Well, the seats are like, you know, like this wide. You're fucked up. Oh my God. We're going to sit next to each other tomorrow. We're going to take up half that goddamn row. We're going to look like a fucking Nazi Klan rally. We sure are. Amen. And it's a show that's going to be, it's going to be, sir, can I check, no, you can't check anything. Can't check anything. We're going to check you on January six. Can I check your seats? Yeah, exactly. Were you in Pelosi's office? Yeah. That was me. Were you slipping through the laptop? I have an alibi for January six. They can suck my dick. We were live on air when it happened. Were you? Yeah. Wait, did you like report live? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, I got to go back and listen to that one. We didn't know. No, but like, did you hear that it was happening while you were on the show? Yeah. Yeah. No, we were interviewing Francis. Francis Ellis. He did it for him. Oh, I got it. Yeah. The ginger. Yeah. Yeah. It's funny. It's shit. The Harvard ginger. He was the editor and chief of the Bible at the time. That's right. That's right. That's right. Yeah. He kept looking down because we were talking about it. He was like, I think I need to go and cover this. Like, yeah. Yeah, we do too. Go back and listen to that. Yeah. And we're just in the middle of a normal show asking about life and everything else and blah, blah, blah. And like, and we love Francis. We try to hire him. Like, sure. We love Francis. And so... He's down, man. He was looking down. I'm looking down because, you know, I've always got a computer with notes and things like that. He's looking down. I'm looking down. And finally, I go, hey man, are you seeing what's happening here? And he goes, it's kind of all in the background, but I go, what's up? And I go, people have overtaken the capital. And we're live on air. And he's the, you know, the editor of Bro Bible at the time, like the head of it. And he's like, I see his eyes grow wide and he goes, oh shit, oh shit, he goes, guys, I hate to do this. And I've never done this on a show before, but I got to go report this on my own shit. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Absolutely go. So he cuts out, and then him and I stay on for close to six hours that day. Wow. And we finish it off, and yeah, it was hilarious and bizarre, and it was one of those weird stories days, right place, right time, and yeah, we just happen to be live on air when it happens. That's amazing. Yeah. And that's the beauty of this job where not only do you get to do events like this and just show up at a bar in the middle of the afternoon with a live crowd, drink, you know, booze all day, but then you have days like that where you're like, holy shit, important things are going on in the world, and this is a wild set right now. That's fucking nuts. Yeah. That's awesome. So it's great. And then the fact that we're able to switch back and forth between sports pop culture and politics and other stuff. I'm a big fan of all the triumvirate they all do. Yeah. So it's been awesome, but we appreciate you being here. Yeah. For you. Same thing to us. Mikey, drinking bro the week who is someone who has inspired you helps to become the person you are today. Chris Maduro, the dictator of Venezuela for sending all of his prisoners and rehab addicts to our country. I think it will be a flashpoint and we will finally get immigration reform and deportations because they are so much more aggressive than the previous illegal. So thank you, Nicholas Maduro for changing our country. That's a great answer. And then the deal Salvador got to do the same thing, but yeah, yeah, I think we're actually going to I think we're actually going to have deportations in this country. I really do. Well, I've been saying we need to build giant catapults and just launch them in the fucking ocean. Dude, I think it's going to be I think listen, I'm a big critic of democracy. I think it's played out and boring and I think America is pretty stupid. So we shouldn't let a lot of people vote. I think we had a benevolent dictator. We would have real change. And I prefer that than, you know, this liberal democracy bullshit we have now. I agree. I mean, we talk about the show all the time. Yeah. Do you think you'll win? You think you'll have to win? Yeah, I do. So does Pauli Markett. Pauli Markett's got over $799 million bet right now on the, uh, the election. No shit. Yeah. And Trump's got 52%. Yeah. It was lower. He keeps going up actually. Yeah. And it's going to go up again after the debate next week. I think the Kamala vibes are wearing off because it's been nothing but vibes and people hear her policies. They're like, hold on. Wait a minute. What the fuck did you say? Price controls. What do you say? What do you mean? You heard a Diocletian bitch. Right. Right. I think people are going to get hit to it and be like, hold on. I really do think the border is number one for a lot of people. It is for me. It's a border. It's a fucking border. It's even the border of the economy. Well, that's the same thing. And it's not one of those two things. You're a fucking idiot. You're a weirdo. Yeah. At least leftist weirdos want a welfare state and they want, you know, more benefits. That's great. I hope you get them, motherfucker. But guess what? Won't let you get them. Illegal immigrants born over this border. Yeah. You're going to have one of the other welfare state or illegals. What do you want? Pick your poison, bitch. So have you bet that? Have I bet on it? Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. So my parents live in Austria. They've retired there. And you can bet on polling market in Europe. You can't bet in the state. So you've got to have a VPN in the states or you've got to have a friend in Europe. So I bet on Kamala, when she was at like 38%, and I bet on Trump, when he was at 38%, so I'm free rolling for the election, I picked JD Vance to be the VP months ago. I got paid on that. No shit. So we had Charlie Kirk on the show, whose best friends with JD, and he said, hey, three weeks before he goes, JD is the VP. Yeah. And I was like, come on, I didn't believe this. I didn't bet it. No. And then showed off it happened. I think it's a great choice. I love JD. I don't care. I'm a populist you have, and the less Neocons, the better. Yeah. Less forever wars. The more, you know, pro-natalist motherfuckers in government. I think that's what really matters in this country. Yeah. I agree. And like, I think he's a good candidate. I think he's a good pick. If I had one other choice, it would probably be Tulsi, and that's about it. Sure, that's fair. I'm just glad he didn't pick, you know, Glenn Yunken, or some other Neocon that is just going to get us into one more fucking war. Yeah. Honestly. So we'll see what happens. Are you down in urban Texas? No. I'm in Connecticut now. Okay. Not far from Mikey, believe it or not. Gotcha. Yeah. We're down the road. Because next time you're down in Texas. I won't be. She's coming to the studio. She's over in Austin. Yeah, we're in Austin. And you've been there. Okay. You're on the west side. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So I'm in, I was in Dallas in July, and I could have come down easy. But next time I'm down there. Pop on in. We love to have you live in the studio, man. I appreciate it. Thanks, y'all. It'd be great. Absolutely. Take the air bear to close it out. Yeah. Right over here. There you go. There you go. The air bear. Look at this fucking guy. Look at you. It's a specimen. Look at him. There it is. What are you having? Damn. Come on, man. Damn, that's all for you. Look at this. That's poison. I'm not eating any of that shit, man. Yeah. I'll eat it on the right way. Let's go. I'll eat it on the right way. Cheers. Cheers. We'll ring brothers, dude. Lord of the Rings. All right. What's up? Lord of the Rings. We're sending you out to Detroit tonight. All right. What are you getting in Detroit? All right. We're going to-- Where are we going, boys? Right down. Right down. We're going to go to this casino. It's across street from the jail. So we're going to rest it. Hop, skip, and a jump. It's not a jail anymore. It was a jail. It was a jail. It was a jail. Okay. We're going to be asking people if Detroit is making a comeback. I'm from Ohio, and I used to come up to Detroit for, you know, hockey tournaments because I'd go to concerts by weed, and I bought all our weed up here. Sure. And it was a total shithole because of the recession and whatnot. So we're going to see what it's all about, and kind of my ass cheek is-- I'm in pain. I'm going to see if I can find a massage. What happened? I don't know. I actually do not know. I think I might be developing hypertension a little bit. What's that got to do with your ass? Yeah. You know, got hypertension in my ass cheek, Dan. Sounds like something for everybody. Yeah. Can we tell the audience when you asked me on the text message last night? Yeah. I'm an open book. Great. With Dan and I on the text, you go, "Hey, do we have money in the budget for a prostitute?" Yeah. Yeah. When you said no. No. In Vegas, they're like $1,000. No, we're going to ugly one. Detroit. They're like $30. Yes. I'm here to tell you, if you get a prostitute to Detroit, that's paid for it. That's petty cash. We don't care about that. Yeah. Okay. So we can get jerked off later. Well, not Joel. Joel's married, Fay. Joel's married, obviously, but you can get jerked off. So you got jacked off for $25 the other night. Twenty-five bucks. What do you think about that? Well, how was our hand, Gary? Is it black, illegal Cuban immigrant? No, but I mean, the salt. How do you think the handle is? It was all coconut oil, all of that. Okay. It was one--. Twenty-five bucks, one-song hand job didn't come, but it was the gesture. Yeah. Why didn't she come? Got a lot of hand jobs. Ross. You did it. You did it. My cock is callous. No. If somebody's charged me $25, I'm just jerking off in front of her. That's it. Yeah. I just want a viewing audience. Yeah. Andrew Diesclay used to say, if I pay for your dinner, I'm dropping a loan in your presence, even if I have to follow you up the fucking driveway, jerking off. You know what's funny? I actually got her phone number, and I called her later. Wait, she's got a phone? Yeah. One of those Obama phones. Yeah. Free phone. Free Obama phone. This guy. But yeah, I'm still waiting for that call back. There it is. I told you that about today's episode is coming out. Coming out right after this. It's Chicago. Chicago. Chicago. We had people about the South Side, gun violence, if they should own a gun, what they think about gun laws. There's a dichotomy in the episode that you're going to realize. We were in the North Side. We didn't go to the South Side because we didn't have a car, and I didn't want to get stuck down there and get the camera stolen or something like that. But we were in the North Side, and then we went to Wrigleyville, and you'll notice there's a dichotomy between the white people and the black people that we talked to, and the white people in Chicago was not a big fan, we put it that way. Really? Okay. They were very hesitant to talk about the South Side and talk shit about it, and white liberals are all cowards. That's exactly what it was. My opinion here is that they were either huge pussies, and they were literally scared of the South Side of the video going viral, and somebody's seeing it, or they were scared of being portrayed as racist because the South Side's all black, and all the black people we talked to were like, "Yeah, we kind of like Trump. And the South Side's bucked up, and it needs to be fixed." They were totally honest, and they were the coolest people, I think we've interviewed so far. So the shit. Yeah. And then last question here, because I saw that famous hot dog place. You guys went there, right? What was the name of it? Weiner Circle. Shout out Weiner Circle. They are, they're actually super nice, but when you go in there, they talk a bunch of shit to you. They give you a hot dog Chicago style. This one chick actually was like, "Shick, all she saw was this." And she goes, "What is that, a dick on your chest?" And I go, "No, it's my son." And she immediately goes, "Oh." Off the only person they were nice to, it's a bunch of crazy black ladies. Super cool, but they talk a lot of shit to everybody, and for some reason I was the only person they were nice to. Same thing with Dan. I'm the only person that Dan's nice to, because he's got a soft spot, because... Yes. No. Yeah, dude. Don't put a play on for the camera. You love me. He's Dan's, Dan has a soft spot for me, and he'll never admit it, but it's true. It is true. It is true. It's true. It's so true. So watch Street Gunzo this weekend, enjoy your lives. I want to give a shout-out to all the drinking bros that came out today. Cheers, you guys. You brought shots here, so we'll end the show with a shot. Thank you. What about drinking, by the way? All right, cheers. Here we go. Awesome, ma'am. Thanks for coming out. We appreciate you being here. Thank you to the Brown Jug. Thank you to the University of Michigan for having us. If you're here, grab some hard-air self-serve. Mays and Blueberry is for sale everywhere. For Dan, Danny, Dan, Danny Holloway, I'm Ross Patterson. This is the drinking bros podcast. Good night, everyone. [CHEERING] [MUSIC PLAYING] [MUSIC PLAYING] (upbeat music)
