It’s tea time
Wheelmen
The Twenty Eighth Episode
Oh how public episode Jordan's house My tummy still so full. That's why I didn't want to go get ice cream. Hello. I'm just very Jordan say hello I Scream so this is a game That Jesse's been playing with her with with her students and it's called Salad soup or sandwich Okay, so it's like you only have those three categories. Okay. All right, so I'm gonna say something salad super sandwich Yeah, you have to see it's either easy. Let's go. So ice cream to Okay This could be salad. No good next okay. No, I can't it can't be ravioli ravioli Like a single ravioli or a plate of raviolis and sauce Okay, there's like like four little ravioli four like big raviolis with some sauce soup Hmm see I'm gonna say sandwich It just happens to be three little sandwiches No, it's like that's why I asked because if it's a single ravioli then I would say that's the same way a slice of lasagna Yeah, yeah, that's a sandwich because it's kind of like a club you know get your layers fucking yeah so my main thing for this if I'm breaking down the The the the parts of it would be if it is Predominantly wet or if there's a lot of wet happening. Mm-hmm. It's a soup right if it has like a lot of vegetables or A lot of things that aren't like bread. Yeah, then it's a salad And then if it has anything to have to do with like stuff being in close any type of like case or yeah any type of of edible Constraints to keep everything together than what about like a sandwich of like one of those fish But with with the head still on it like a like is a fish so is a is a fried fish a sandwich sandwich, yep I Think would be salad because you're eating it with a fork. You're not picking it up or anything No, I don't know Okay, what would you call a pizza a slice of pizza pizza is a sandwich. I would say sandwich. What do you think? Pizza would be a sandwich for sure. Yeah What about I don't know I was gonna say well do you want to say ones? That's like it's like would be very obvious Like the only things I could think of oh, okay. I'll play different choice. Oh That's a salad show. Yeah. Okay, so we're on the same wavelength. Yeah for that one. Yeah. All right, so here's another game where Okay, so I'm gonna pick category and it's gonna be let's just say countries and then I'm gonna use you say a country and I'm gonna say in percentage If it's close like a hundred it would be you guessed the country and then like the percentage would like kind of show you If it's close to that or not, okay All right, maybe yes, it doesn't really make sense, but you'll see all right. Go ahead Belgium. Oh Hold on. I got to think of a country No, no, it's gonna be good. It's gonna be all right. All right. Go now you can go this one Bob boy. Mm-hmm I'm gonna say 40% Pakistan. Okay. I'm closer to 65% Turkey I would say 65% still Azerbaijan 70% it's gonna be terrible to listen to I know it's just like Uzbekistan Now just say I got it when I guess all right understand. Yeah It was a Philippines so I guess but that one's weird because you're like you could either do it by like if it's closer to the culture Yeah, I don't know about closer. Yeah. I don't know either. Anyway, I tried you did Andrew will you please cue the music for movie time I Look at as excited as I didn't watch any movies you fucking suck dude. You have one job. No, I know Are you gonna watch that movie while it's in the theaters? Well, I mean yeah, yeah, I Haven't I just have time I thought I would maybe have time and then I ended up I um I Had a birthday party weekend type of thing last weekend that like I I Yeah, I was like the the week I lost track of the week. Yeah Yeah, yeah, I get it. I get it. Okay. Well, we're not talking about it. So you didn't see any movies just like In general. No, I started re-watching Sandman though Sandman the HBO Neil game and oh Okay, yeah, I had watched like almost half of it, but I was like really drunk. Yeah, I think it was also With so I'm so I'm so sad because now it's gonna be so many weeks have passed when we don't get to talk about The little alien Romulus, but that's okay. You talk about it, dude. I don't want to I heard that it was good Yeah, it was good. I heard it was cool. Don't are you not like? Super excited about it cuz I thought that you'd be like peeing your pants Um I have some qualms with it for sure. No, but you know, it was enjoyable to watch for sure You know, I had a great time watching it, but you know, I'm I'm a die-hard fan. So I'm like, yeah I like the movies die-hard also. I did actually know that's why I watched two movies. Okay this weekend I watched the hunt for red October. Oh good one 19 Widowmaker. Oh hell. Yeah, I watched back-to-back sub movies nice nice I love them. Yeah Yeah, I love hunt for red October, that's a that's an old one. Does that still hold up? Oh my god, yeah Okay, the special effects Are a little wonky. Yeah, when it does like the like the kind of like green-screeny like ocean shots. Oh god. Yeah But it's crazy cuz back in the day. We're like, oh, yeah, this is sick You know, remember there like there were so many weird movies that were completely forgotten about nowadays Like do you remember like chain reaction with Keanu Reeves? Like that's just another volcano movie. No No, it's not But speaking like volcano with a like nobody thinks about that volcano that was like ring of fire No, Dante's peak Dante's peak. Wasn't one like call like the core or there was a peak fucked me up because there was that scene in the very beginning where they're they go to swim in the Springs and before the kids about to jump into the Springs and then his dad which is peers Pierce Who's that guy? Anyway, his dad stops him from jumping in because they see that there's like two bodies in there boiling away That always fucked me movie fucked me up in the beginning was Was vertical limit vertical limit. Yeah in the beginning when the dads cutting the rope I always felt bad for the guys below him being like, no, don't comment. You know where the guys belong. Yeah It's just the three of them. No, it's three of them the dad and then there's some people below Yeah, I don't remember the people so he was making the decision. Yeah for all of them Yeah, you just see these kids that's fucked up and they had to make the same decision at the end I miss because my mom and I were talking about this I miss When you would have like a summer blockbuster for lack of a better term like a big movie would come out Okay, and you would just have like Everyone was in it because when we were watching I watched it with my mom with my mom when I stepped at a hundred right October Yeah, and then every scene we're like, oh shit. Is that that guy? Yeah, everyone in that movie is like one of those guys Right, right like everyone is like a guy that you know from somewhere Yeah, and we were talking about how like that doesn't fucking happen anymore Like you're not going to have like a new movie be made and then it's like oh the cook is Is that the guy from the office? You know what I mean? Like it's not like Casting just doesn't work like that anymore and like how much that sucks because that was like such a fun part of watching Casting is always like you they pay so much money to get like three people that are really big names and then they just have to like Cheap out on everyone else. Well, you can get paid scale. Yeah, I don't know what that means, but um, it's like It's like I don't know Andrew would know more My understanding of it is it's like it's like a It's like you get paid a percentage of like what the movie makes Based on like a little screen time. That's kind of cool something like that But I don't know I really don't know how it's that's all I know is a TJ millage only reason I know that about that I mean I've heard getting paid to scale But the best example I have of that is like TJ Miller was on legion of skanks Not too long ago, and he was talking about how he made $70,000 for like a Transformers movie. Oh, he's only in it. He's not in it for that long, right? And he's like yeah, I got paid scale. Oh interesting. Okay. It's kind of like pulling tips almost kind of yeah I mean like it makes sense like Yeah, if you're only gonna be in the movie for a little bit like why would they pay you a shit ton of money, right? You know, I mean unless you're like one of these huge stars, and it's like right you're gonna have your cameo. Yeah, I mean But I don't fucking know Um, I recently saw another Glenn Powell movie you love Glenn, dude He's on Netflix, and he's he's in this rom-com with Sydney Sweeney. Did you search him? Yes Yes, I did. I wanted to see more movies with him in it But it was him and Sydney Sweeney. It was like a rom-com they like meet each other and they have a lovely first date but then she leaves in the morning and then she she's like what am I doing and she goes back and he's Speaking to his buddy, but he's kind of like he's mad that she left He you know in the morning, so he's like kind of bad mouthing her and she she hears before you know And so she turns around she's like oh man, but then they find each other again at a party and then they're like You you fucking left and she's like well, you're an asshole and then it's like you know kind of like their journey together Like not liking each other, but then ended up liking each other. Mm-hmm, but it's cool. It was good Those movies serve a purpose. They do it's literally just for us to go. Oh, it's girlfriend. It's it's it's girlfriend Yeah, but for me, I I watch it by myself because you're you're a girl. I'm just kidding I did watch that with her. Yeah. Yeah, but she liked it I don't like it when people talk shit about those kind of movies honestly because like Those are movies. Those are like airplane movies. That's like bus ride movie. That's like date night movie where you're like Doesn't really matter if you're watching or not you know what I mean. Yeah, like that's a movie where it's like Every Tuesday we you know, this is our night together. Yeah, so then you put on a movie like that because then it's like you're in the kitchen Check check the phone the dogs barking You know, I mean mm-hmm. You like pussing around but you have a movie on and you're kind of hanging out and you're sort of paying attention You're kind of not Yeah, those movies are a purpose. Yeah for sure and I do miss when that was like a legitimate genre of filmmaking Was shitty rom-com. No, just like purposefully like Kind of like a passive watching movie. Yeah, it's like Matthew McConaughey And just like a cheap date night movie like a Vince Vaughn or a fucking hell. Yeah, like any of those Not Luke Wilson, but the other one well Luke Wilson and all the Wilson's all the Wilson's who's when they died What? There's one of them died. I don't know He was anyway, but no, I I really I I wish that the people filmmakers were doing more of like, you know what? Let's just have it be there's just like a couple more jokes You know why stuff for the guy or their stuff for the couple and we can just all kind of hang I think it's because a lot of people aren't in a relationship right now There's a lot of people that are really lonely and I don't I you know, it's all about money So it's like are more people in a relationship that are gonna watch a movie together like that Or are more people like lonely little guys? They're gonna put on I don't know the new Terminator and You know I Was not into the the oh not turn here. I was thinking of never mind. What's the the cars that turn in the robots? Transformers? Yeah, I wasn't really a transformers guy The Terminator. There's a new Terminator coming out. There's like a Terminator anime. Oh, okay. Okay, that could be cool I'll watch it. Yeah, I mean there's like all those like straight to Netflix like Weird animation animes that have been really popular that like I've been I've been really into so I last last week I was talking about how like we went to Gettysburg and got me like thinking like, you know I don't think I've ever seen a movie about like Gettysburg. There's in there a movie called Gettysburg There's a movie called Gettysburg. I think there's one called Glory But I've never seen him. So maybe I'll watch I don't know if I've ever seen a movie about the battle of and of Antietam No, I don't think so either or of what bull run. Yeah, that was the first one Wait, isn't there one like masters and commanders that like kind of take boat one though, right? Is it master commander? That's the Russell Pro. That's the movie where they like cut the kids leg off and make them bite a spoon Oh, really that movie. I don't know. I think I haven't seen it, you know, yeah, I mean I Think I think the patriot Kind of put the nail in the coffin for like Revolutionary and like civil war stuff. Yeah You know, cuz it was like I mean the Patriots a very good movie. It's so good Another another perfect example of a movie that like everyone is in yeah And they just have like a bit role like a lot of the people in there just like that guy. Yeah, no, you're right. You're right three scenes Yeah That is it is a whole mountain. That was a civil war movie. Yes. Yes. Oh Legends of the fall is kind of almost that yeah Anyway, so there haven't been any recent ones that I can think of as Lincoln. They don't really show and it's not You know, we're not getting like like I think that can battles and that it would be cool if someone actually went and did not Like a civil war movie specifically, but like like a good like Sherman's March. Yeah Like like a like a brutal Sherman movie. Yeah, or like a brutal William Tecumseh Sherman is like one of my heroes a fucking love like like a really brutal like Gettysburg or like Antietam or like a Bunker Hill could be fun. Yeah, cuz you can't really do the the war because it's so Movie is there a movie with the Tea Party in it? Probably but they probably don't get it right because Do you know the do you know the actual story of the Tea Party It was a The sons of Liberty were protesting taxes and then they went on they boarded a ship and so okay It was like stamped. It was other it was like stamps and tea and Cough there's like a bunch of shit. So on the boat. I got I wanted to do this for July 4th I forgot I never did it, but um So it's actually interesting. It doesn't really have anything to do with taxes at all So what basically happened is like so the East India Company they were like going bankrupt and Of course England was like we want to save this corporation. So What the East India Company had to do would take its tea it would go to England auction that tea off to England and Then from there it would go to America But England to help them with their money problems. They said you don't have to come to us anymore you can go straight from India to the Not the United States, but you know, I mean the colonies and sell your tea the issue is is that the people over here their smuggling was huge and they Would smuggle the tea in and they would they would sell the tea off. So they The colonists got their tea for cheap, but they got it from the smugglers But what this thing did was that the tea being sold legally Would be cheaper than the smuggled tea. So effectively it was attacks on the smuggled tea So like that's kind of like what happened and then So, yeah, they got pissed off because they couldn't see market corrected it Yeah, and they were they were like pissed off about that and then and also the Sun's Liberty who did it they they dressed up and as Native Americans and went on board and they smashed all the crates and They like tore open the bags but then so that like there could be as much damage as possible and then they pushed it in the harbor and then for the next day they Would take boats out there and make sure that the crates Continue to get fucked up because some of them were still floating. They were like no fuck that and So yeah, and because it cost Them so much England so much fucking money That's when they did the quartering act and the the town synaks Which I'll you know made it so that they could core they could quarter like British troops into like like people's houses and stuff and That's what you know, inevitably kind of started everything Not started was starting but you know, I mean like kind of like made things go overboard. Yeah, but it wasn't a tax It's not like they taxed the tea more they'd actually It would have been cheaper for the colonists to just Have this new tea, but since they were getting it by smugglers. It was effectively a tax I guess but it made the smugglers mad But anyway, yeah, I don't I don't know if anyone did a movie on it if you know I would if you're listening you should do it Option us in I guess cuz there's nowhere for it to go without it being a long-ass movie because how are you gonna end a movie? That's strictly about that little section. You know, I mean literally. I mean you just be like Three blossom. I guess you could have like the British coming in. Yeah, you end it like apocalypse though. We're like yeah Yeah, yeah, it just got worse teeth, right? I find it funny that the DC license plates say taxation without representation. Yeah, I mean it is kind of true for them. It's true It's odd, right? It's really like Flaunting it in people's feet like I don't get it. It's just like eat the slop pig Yeah, I mean I don't fucking understand. Yeah, cuz I get I don't know. That's This strange. I think it's like that weird like Flaunting it but like being upset about it at the same time like I don't get it I always thought that it was like a weird like no taxation without representation throwback But like misguided I don't know for a long time I thought that like it said no, but I was like couldn't see it cuz it was like under like the plastic like Like like holders for the license places. Yeah, and I realized that they just DC's fucking weird, dude We're fucking it is weird that there's like how many people live in DC. I don't know, but they just don't have a Like a Have they have a representative. They just don't have any voting power. I don't know how many people actually live in DC Cuz DC is one of those like amorphous social geography regions we're like I'm sure like I don't know five six seven times The amount of people that actually live in DC like claim That they live in DC because they live in like college park or Montgomery County you're in northern Virginia Cuz like it's it's easier to say DC area Yeah, no one's gonna know what the fuck you're talking about if you're like I live in fucking Hyatt's Speaking of DC. I thought of this too when I was in Gettysburg is like You'll say sis Graham was kind of known to be like a Corrupted dude and I was thinking like man If you were like a president or representative of something like how fast do you think you would like? Give in to lobbyists. I mean it would be pretty fucking fast for me. Yeah It'd be all they'd be like yo, do you want a new Toyota and be like oh? Yeah, what I gotta do Yes big oil. Oh, yeah, I would sell out so fucking fast I would be I'd be saying the same ship Bernie does but like worse But then as soon as I get elected I'd be like You know what actually what yum and ever done for us Even fucking point Kirsten on a map. Yeah cares. I think either. I think if I was going to be Like a Capitol Hill like the swamp. Yeah, type of politician. I Don't I don't know if I would give in to the lobbyists up front Because I would be more worried about the back end on that shit I would I would be spending my time down there hobnobbing with all the people so like Once my term is done like once I'm out then you can then I can then I can be like a consultant for like Raytheon and I yeah, like book tours like that's what I want like the speaking honestly Though do you think you would you would fall that bad into it? Like you know like like north or crumb and all them like do you think you'd be like if I was like a if I was like a Three or four term senator from like North Carolina Yeah, and then I got out and then just wanted to be like I'm saying you have your ideals that you have now Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah me right now if I got elected as like a fucking a senator for Maryland Yeah, how many terms did you have to but you're running on your little communist bullshit? Yeah, and then you get in yeah And you're you honestly think you'd be how fast before before the lobbyists. Yeah, I Don't think it would know because I would be targeted by the right so I the whole time I just be calling the right names Like I just be I would just be bullying like like conservative politicians Right, but somebody would have to come to you and with like to do their deeds There would be I wonder who would actually like try and get me to like in like do their shit Yeah, like who would be the one like big alcohol like big weed I mean like a lot like weed lobbyists and stuff for like environmental like like quote good lobbyists like Big health care probably big health care would be like yo, you're for universal health care. So like Why don't you help me? You know sell these private medicines? No, I think that there would be there would definitely be like interest groups that I would Have no issue falling in line with but but let's say big oil then comes and then they just give you so much money We wouldn't sell out no because I would just be a drop in the bucket of like their political influence and power They would they will probably wouldn't even bother coming to me because they have so many other like old dudes on private islands and shit. Yeah like clearance Thomas shit like Yeah, I would I like I aren't like truly like I would wait until I was done And then I would spend my time while I was in there like just making the connection so that like when I'm off Then I could that is the way to write a book go on like speaking and engagement tours You know, I mean like do like commencement speeches. Yes, you know rich AOC is gonna be when she's if she ever retires Yeah, she's gonna have so many She's gonna have so many books book deals. She's definitely being tapped to be the next Nancy Pelosi if not Like run for president or both. Yeah Oh, she'll have book deals and they'll make a biopic, but no, I think that I mean I Think AOC you should be fine We don't politics for biopic will be like some white girl He's just way watching just fucking CGI tear It's like it's just Sabrina Carpenter. Yeah That me espresso. Yeah, that's that that that's that me AOC. Oh, dude. Yeah What down a shirt a Bella danger That would be very funny if they just got Latina porn star to be AOC Yeah, there's no AOC spoof porn is there. They never got a nailing paler now. That stuff is so weird You ever watch a nailing paler. No, no, I had sex to nailing one. So it's weird. Really? Yeah, kind of like as a joke nailing palerne. We have the the Sarah Palin spoof porno. I didn't know that there was one. Yes, you did your line I swear to God. I don't know what you're talking about. Yes, there's a porno I know that they do like Sarah Palin. That's called nailing Palin. Oh, damn. And it's they get sued No, I don't think so. And it's just a porn star that kind of looks like Sarah Palin and Just has sex damn a lot of sex and I was I was with someone and We hadn't been dating that long and we were just like trying to see what each other liked. You know what I mean? And I remember one day we like we like drank a bottle of wine or something and And I was like Do you want to watch porn like while we fuck and she was like I've never done that before have you and I was like I'm not really and she's like do you like that? And I was like, I don't know like do you? And so we we were like what should we watch cuz I cuz she was like, I don't want to watch The porn that you normally watch and I was like, that's completely fair That is completely fair and I was like, I don't know if you watch porn But I feel like I don't know if I'd like your porn and then she was like you would not like my porn And I was like, well, what should we watch that and then we were like Kind of like kicking around ideas and I was like, yo What if we watch the Sarah Palin porn and then she was like, oh my god, that'd be so funny So we found it but the only thing that we could find was I swear to god dude. It was like cut up into four corners Right, so like the the image was cut up into like four sections each section being a corner and each section had It's a separate porn playing and one of the corners was nailing Palin So there were like four pornos happening on the screen because the other ones were the other Were the other regular videos like us like Go just like normal porn. No, I'm saying where they swiped from the internet or ever. That's not the word I'm looking for white white. I don't remember this is so long. I think it's thunderstorming. I think it's thunderstorming Sorry dude You know that was a funny that was a funny time. Oh, did I ever tell you so much time we have Man, I gotta say it for patreon. Oh, okay. I have a good story Do you have a minute if you want to say something for this? Oh, I don't have anything ever to say Okay, well if you want to hear a really funny story about me being in a Baton Rouge hotel with my girlfriend and meeting A prostitute Baton Rouge. Isn't that like a musical you mean Mulan Rouge? Shit, I guess it is. Yeah, Baton Rouge school. I had a really good fish down there Yeah, yeah, that was that's the place to get it. We were on tour. That was on Misha tour I was one of the last I think it was the last Misha tour and We when we were on tour We used to have a contest between all the band members as to who could go the longest without showering Uh-huh and we made it around the country I didn't shower for a month damn, and I had like two changes of clothes and I met up with my girlfriend at the time and we got a hotel in Louisiana Okay, and she made me wash my clothes in the sink and the water turned black Oh, dude, I come to be drinking a minute on you I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I (air whooshing) [BLANK_AUDIO]