C&Whit Podcast
We Are Not Smarter Than A Fifth Grader
Welcome back, bitches, to another podcast with Whitney Ren, and this is Brianna, as you guys know. Ew. It's game night. Sorry, she didn't like that. She likes Bri Bri. It's game night, game show day, because, you know, we're gonna make this more of a relaxing podcast now, okay? No more drama. It's my life, okay? I can't help it. I'm just trying to talk my way out of it, but it's fine. No drama today. But we are gonna talk today about what happened to Whitney. Let's just say I don't drive my trucks, ever, okay? You want to say hi to them? Hey, guys. It's our ADHD. Just went, "We're home." I don't ever drive my black truck. It always really just sits there and stares at me. It's been dead. It's been dead. The batteries are 50 years old. We just, she's snoring. We just now changed them, okay? Her boyfriend came over. We go and get batteries. He plugs them in. They don't work. He goes and tests them again the next day. He says they're fine. So has somebody else come over and plug them in? It works. The truck turns on. This morning I woke up. I was like, "I got to drive my trucks. Go get my nails done." My truck's been sitting for so long in the Florida heat. It's about 105 degrees outside. My wheels are warped. They're separated from the actual tire. The tire melts in. So I'm driving down the road and it's like, and I sort of got almost whacked somebody. I'm in the ditch. My literally, like, my road is like this big. And I'm literally driving and it's like, "Here, old woman." I was like, "Oh, there goes the dish." I'm like, "What's this going on?" I'm like doing like a big circle. But they're like angled like this. So they're like, whatever. I call my mom. She's like, "We used to probably get that fix when you think..." "Sweet to drop off the truck today. I thought I was going to die." You know, the usual, "Drop the truck off." It looked like there was slashes in my tires. So you need all new tires, right? We're getting all new tires. And the ones that I have now are back ordered. So we have to get different ones now. So I'm really excited about that one. Truck and boat got detailed today. What else happened? Yeah, and your Jeep. Huh? And your Jeep. My Jeep. All vehicles. All vehicles. What else happened? Oh, the last two days I had to go to the vet with four of my dogs because two of them have hematomas in their ear because they shake and burst some blood vessels. I think that the dogs chewed on their ears and burst them. Come on from swimming. And when they shake their ears, like, flaps against their head, and their swim, they have ear infections. So that was a fun last two days. So no pool for two weeks. No pool. My pool is getting redone. Yeah, win. Starting September 10th. So that'll be fun. I have a show next week. My song comes out on the 28th. And what about you? What's going on with you? She's going to Ohio this weekend. We're going to Ohio this weekend for a bridal shower, which I've never been in a wedding. So I'm excited. That's exciting. Are you made of honor? No. Bridesmaid. Bridesmaid. I was supposed to be a bridal shower. She had, I was actually supposed to be a bridesmaid. It's my cousin, so her sisters are her made of honor. Uh-oh. Just two. I was so... Yeah, I felt like that was nice to have me as bridesmaid, though, because you never had that. I was supposed to be a bridesmaid by the person who's suing me. So... I remember that. He actually broke up in there because she's crazy. Yeah. So going to Ohio for that, then your show, the fall, I literally get back Monday, late Friday for your show. And then September, I have the bachelor and bachelor at party. It's, it's like joined. Which I feel like that's interesting. I wouldn't. Actually, I probably would. You would have yours together? Mm-hmm. I don't know. I don't know. I feel like I would, just because I wouldn't want them to go like the strip club or something without me. I feel like that's not... I would be the stripper. Yeah. Mm-hmm. So we're doing that, and that's in Destin and then the weddings in October. What color? Is it? Sage green, I think the color is called. Wow. It's actually really pretty. This is like the color I want my dresses. It's like the darker green. Like... I probably am. But like this, actually. Oh. Like that green. That's interesting. Yeah. It's cute. Yeah. I got to pick my own dress, too. Are you going to get married? Sometimes soon. Mm-hmm. Not a question for me. Mm-hmm. It's not. Anyhose, you want tea? What else are we talking about? Should we answer some questions or no? Yeah, we can. You have them. What's the answer like three questions in this? I want to answer a couple questions. We'll start our game. We'll start our game. Last podcast. We answered a lot. So I feel like most of these are going to be the same kind of questions. Yeah, they probably are. Then we're going to play a game. Mm-hmm. Try to decide if I want to take a trip this weekend and I haven't decided yet. Oh, shoot. Where did I have them? Oh, right here. Do you want me to ask you them? I'm sure. 'Cause they're for you, baby. Yeah, sure. Okay. Questions with what? Do you want the phone or? Yeah. Okay. I don't know the question. I sent it. Oh. Okay. Let's see. I always crack my fingers when I'm nervous. Not nervous, but when I get anxiety. I got my nails done today. My nails do you have set for yourself that you hope to achieve by the end of the year? Do more shows. Write more songs. More dogs. Not. I'm out. I'm out. No more dogs. Please. Cut off, cut off. In my spending has more babies. Yeah. No, she's not. She's not pregnant. I don't think. Another... I don't know. I'm out for like your relationship wise. Oh. Do you have any goals for that? No. I'm just going to the flow. Okay. All right. This is Juicy. Marissa and Kirsten are friends and have been talking behind your back question mark. I actually just called her out for their group chat and they had another day. I want to breakfast with them. And so one of their phones are sitting on the table and they all have a group chat. And I look over and they're talking about me and I was like, we're at breakfast with her now. And Mar says, you guys have no balls. Bye. It's like, oh my God. This is really good. Why do we have a group chat? I would never have a group chat talking about the girl, first of all, for someone I live with. But what does that do with me? But second, if somebody's going to shoot up the house that you live in and you're still talking to them, you might as well stand out front and just let it happen. It's like, yeah, what are we doing? I've never, ever threatened to shoot up somebody's house. But I guess we're just throwing that around lately. Would you talk to somebody if they were really far? What would happen if I was talking to someone that said they were going to shoot your house? I would be very mad. I mean, like if we're still going to steal your friend after? Yeah. I don't know. I mean, after all the things that somebody says and makes up about me, like telling the Internet of SDDs when I've been with somebody for the last about nine months, okay? It's not my fault that your family fucked ours over, so maybe keep your hands to yourself. I don't know. Some friends who ever you want to be friends with, but don't be coming to me mad when they air out your shit. So I'm pretty sure that they were the ones to tell somebody's biggest secret. Okay. They said, what's been the hardest part about the breakup? Not hanging out with them every day. I was going to say her being alone. Like, I don't know. And also, too, I'm also going through a hard time regardless of the breakup. I was already going through a hard time, so it's like having that person that was there, not there sucks, but I want to deal with that. I think you're doing great. Thanks, Brian. What's the new whip? New whip. Which one? The truck. What kind of truck? I was supposed to get a new car. I was actually supposed to get a new car. She was going to trade your Jeep. It was actually stolen from our family company, so they were going to give me that car. But I'd rather not get it keyed or drive around someone that I don't want to be reminded of every day, so I decided not to get the car. I thought you were talking about when you were going to trade your Jeep. That was it. I was going to trade my Jeep for her car. You also wanted that GL-E? Oh, yeah. I think so. Yeah, that was before the truck, though. Yeah. She got a new truck, and then it is a... I was going to get a... Yeah. Is it F-250? Yeah, I think so. I don't even know. I just bought it. Well, it's diesel, so 250. I think there's 250s that are gas. Is there? I think so. Someone told me that the other day. Is it Siri? Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Are F-250s gas or diesel? The diesel? Nope. Oh. Okay. I found this on the way. Yup. There is. The old flex gas is said. It's like Niko Diesel. I learned something new every day. Okay. Do you ever just want to get rid of all social media and start over? No. No? Like, would you ever like... Do you ever think about... I think I do think different about regretting being in social media. No. No. No, I make a lot of them bread. I do. Okay, not only fans. I would be... Like, TikTok or... Uh... I don't know. I like it. I feel like there's certain things I don't like. Like, if everybody was nice, it'd be different. Or like, everybody just kept their opinions to themselves. It'd be different. But then nobody would probably be famous. Because the only reason people are famous is because people are obsessed with them. Yup. And that was just something to say about everybody else. But no, I wouldn't say that I would never not do it because I've done it since I was 17, so... If you could go one place in the world, where would you go? One place in the world where would I go? I would just hit my happy ass right under the Eiffel Tower. And stare at the stars. That sounds fun. Okay, last question. What do you look forward to the most in your everyday life? Um... Making money. Granted. Making sure my family's healthy and alive. Making sure I keep myself accountable. You can never say that word. Accountable. Is that a word? Accountable. Accountable? Yeah, I think so. Accountant. Accountable, yeah. Keep myself accountable, wake up every day, living, breathing. Making sure my family's okay. Making sure your haters are watching me. Love you, bitch. There's a flying here and I can see it. I know, I saw a fly in your nose. In my nose? It went up your nose and then like, you went like this. You saw it go in my nose? Yeah. When you like went like that and you smashed your face. Okay. Alright, we're going to play a game. Um, we have a bunch of random weird foods. Make sure my Addie's not. I know, I'm holding it down. I think it's this side. It's not like I wasn't already shared by the people. Yeah, it's on my side. Okay. Um, we have some random like foods and uh... We can't tell, we can't tell them yet. We have to, it has to be a surprise. Okay, that might be old. No, it's not. Okay. Okay, so we're going to ask the question first. If you get it right, you don't have to do it. If you get it wrong, you do. And it's going to be random. So we have a little box with... Oh. You might need some cookies. We have a little box with what we have in this box. You're going to choose a random one. Whatever it is, that person has to eat it. So they're going to be blindfolded. Okay, first question. And it's also the questions you're about each other. Okay. You already wrote it down? No, I looked them up. I'm going to give it to you too, so you can read off of it. Alright. Please don't say middle name. What's my middle name? No, like you can't do this. I forgot. I forgot you. You forgot? You know mine. You know mine, so it doesn't count. I know everything. I know, it doesn't count. Think. Dude. Fuck me. Dude, I am blanking. You want me to give you a hint? No, because then I'll know it, because I know it. No, because you were actually close. Mary. Mary and Joseph. Brianna, Mary. I thought it was Marie, and then I... That's my mom's. I got all my friends. Every single one of my friends I know, but I know yours. Give me a different word. Give me a different question. No. You can't cheat. Dobby. Starts with an M. Marissa. No. Um. Fuck. Morty. Morty. Martha. No. Margaret. Brianna Margaret. Is it Margaret? No. Oh, dang it. It's like a common middle name. I think. I hear it a lot. It's also a first name. Marie. No. Melissa. No. You have one more guess. Bro. I'm blanking. I don't remember. Michelle. Okay. You could have just said my ex-girlfriend. That's too much of a hit. All right. Put your blindfold on. Dude. Okay. Can we start over? Nope. Let's start over. Wendy's trying to cheat, guys. Pick it out. Look at it, and then I'll put it on. I need you cheating. Why would I cheat? Sometimes you cheat. I don't ever cheat. Oh, really? Okay. Come on. Okay. Here, put this down so you guys can see us more well. More well. Do I need to come closer to you? I'll come to you. Okay. I'm just going to hold it because it's my head's too big. I'll prepare. I'm going to prepare myself. You're singing really loudly. I'm up. Why? Just sing wild for a second. That's okay. Keep going louder, louder, louder, louder, louder. Can you see? Okay. Ready? No, I'm scared. Open up. Can I? Nope. You can't sniff. Fuck. Open your mouth. I'm just getting over. Are they... I'm pretty sure these are for dogs. I think they are. Let me see. Snackstick. It doesn't say for dogs. They're kind of disgusting. I'm all sick. Snackstick. That'd be one of my... I thought you were about to... I could have just worn my uvula. I almost got disconnected. They're not old. Ooh! You know all of these. This is cheating. Keep going. No, read them. They're basic questions. And then we'll get a little harder. Yeah, but you know all of them. I know everything. Just ask. Okay. What's my favorite food? I don't even know. Hold on. Let me think. Wait. You have a lot. Favorite food. Hold on. Favorite meal? Like meal. Yeah, or like place. Favorite place. Or like like restaurant. Let's do... Give me what you... Hold on. I'm thinking because I don't have a favorite. So I'm gonna have to make one up. They do another question. Okay. You can't make it up. I like to see you there. Fuck. Where did I grow up? Here. Where's here? St. Pete, Florida. This is gonna be a fucking stupid game. Give me the blindfold. Are you blindfolded? I'm scared. Why are you blindfolded? You got it right. Oh fuck. Okay, let me try. Okay, let's just ask questions until you get wrong then. Give me it. Okay. Wait. What's my favorite color? Blue. Yeah. What's my birthday? I don't know. August 11, 1998. What's my zodiac sign? I knew you were gonna ask that 'cause I don't think I know it. Leo. Yes. Fuck. Okay, who's my celebrity crush? Selena Gomez. Fuck. Where did I go to college? I didn't know it. You didn't go to college but you went to Galen. Okay. What's my favorite season? Summer. Yeah. I don't really have one. How many siblings do I have? I don't have the cold. Actual siblings or half siblings too? Actual. One. Okay. What do I like more? Sweet or salty snacks? Sweet. No. Salty. No, you like ice cream and stuff and crumble cookies? Yeah, like all of them. That's sweet. Okay, we'll just keep going. Okay, we're gonna go to... We're gonna go to... Are you smarter than us? Oh, here we go. Here we go. Here we go. Here we go. You ready? I don't know if I'm smarter than you. We're gonna start for the lower ones. What is the tallest mammal on Earth? Giraffe. Okay, let's go to the next one. Who was the first person to step on the moon? Neil Armstrong. Okay, let's just go for ourselves. Who wrote the famous play Romeo and Juliet? Beethoven. What the fuck do you say? Beethoven. Not Beethoven. Oh, shit. Shakespeare. Yeah. I always get to mix up. What is the capital of France? Paris. Mm-hmm. Oh my God. Are you ever gonna get something wrong? On the periodic table, which element is represented by the letter N? Nitrogen. Okay. This is stupid. You're smart. Oh, it's really good. What is the hardest mineral? Rock? Hm. No. Yeah, it's a rock. Oh, I was right. No, it's not a rock. What is it? Well, I can't tell you now. Life holds yourself. It's a diamond. You have to tell me. Oh, that's a rock. That was not? You have a rock on your fingers. Okay, but there's a diamond. Yeah, but there could be a roof. It was a trick question. Yeah, exactly. Okay. So technically, I got it right. A rock. Did you already pick it? Yeah, I did. I'm so scared right now. Sing loud. Hey! Okay. I'll just close my ears. All right. I'm so scared. I'm so scared. I'm so fucking scared right now. You have to come closer to me. Okay. Open now. Oh my God. Is this like, it's a good one. Mmm. No. You can't. Drizzle. I hate mango. There's boba. I'm gonna have a bite. Oh, rock. Mmm. I hate mango. Mmm. She knows that. You're supposed to eat it. I don't like mango. Okay, but you can't spit it out. Oh, I have a snack stick. We're gonna be like 50. Mmm. First thing, balls. What is a paleontologist study? I have no idea what the fuck that is. That is so easy. A paleontologist? Yes. You learned that in like fifth grade. Palestine's. No. Paleontology. You learned that in fifth grade. Well, that was like 18 years ago. Fossils. I'd never even learned anything about fossils. Dinosaur's. I don't believe it. We don't learn that because you know why? 'Cause we're Jesus Christ. Can't see a fucking thing. Do you cheat? You just cheated. Oh, did I grab you like this? I'm scared. Come on. Put it on. You can't look at me. Okay. Ooh. Oh, I thought my boob was about to fall out. Girl, I'm fired. This girl is on fire. I already know what this is. Please don't give me a lot. You don't know what it is. Please don't give me a lot. Open up. Please. Like I'm serious. I might throw up. Open. I'm scared. Open. You're smelling it. Please don't like throw it. I'm not. Just open. I'm going fast so you don't smell it. What the fuck is that? Yummy. Oh my God. That's good. Look at the bottom of it. Look at the bottom. It's just like old. Fun fact. Everything in Whitney's fridge is old. Oh, this isn't old. This is November. No, but you probably should have shook it. Well, I just got it. What off? Boba and that. I just got the stuff off the top. All right. No, next question. What is the clinical name for the thigh bone? Hamstring. Thyroid. What is it? Thyroid maximus. Your thyroid's in here. And your maximus is right here. I know. It's a fucking femur. I'm going to guess. I hear so. You said what bone? I did. I said the clinical name for the thigh bone. It's a clinical name for the thigh bone. For the thigh bone. Oh. I'm scared. I'm so fucking scared. Why do you want to do this? It's missing out my lashes. What's their date? August 21st. Oh, is it old? No, it's not. Okay, make a noise. I know what that is. It's mayo. I know it's mayo. That's why you're laughing. No. I can hear. If you put a lot on there, I swear to God. I didn't. I didn't. Okay, open. No. No. Who has the mayo, man? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Give me the drink. Oh, my God. I'm gonna throw up. That's really the one thing that you fucking hate. You just saw my face. I was like, oh. God, I'm waiting. Oh, my God. That was so bad. I'm literally crying. Dude, dude, dude, dude. No, it's August 22nd in the fucking inspiration day. It's tomorrow. When you started laughing, I knew it was mayo. Should I wipe it with this? Yeah. Wait, no, we're gonna have to put it on our faces. Yeah, I know. We'll do it on the inside. It's fine. Okay, let me wipe my fingers. Okay. Next. Never again. I think I have jizz in one. Thank God, that's out of the box. Why do you keep getting good ones? Yum yum. What's the longest river in the United States? Fuck. I don't even know the names of rivers. Mississippi. Oh, you're actually really close. Missouri. Yeah. I'll give it to you. Yeah. Cool painted the Mona Lisa. God, I'm so bad at this shit. If you're at least. What? No. It's only in the piano zone. Is that stupid? Oh, it's a casso. Leonardo. Is that right? Leonardo da Vinci. Oh, de Caprio. No, that's the actor. Leonardo da Vinci. All right. Yup. Give me the glasses. Fuck me. Make sure my tits don't come out, all right? I'm in my jammies. Oh God. Are you laughing too? You're laughing. You're laughing. I'm not laughing. Ugh. Is it jelly? Nope. Fuck. I'm scared. I got a sneeze. All right, ready? Mm-hmm. No sniffing. Open your mouth. I have to sneeze. You better sneeze now. Please don't just shove it in my throat. I'm not, but don't close your mouth when I get it there. Mm. That's stupid. With a side of mayo. Oh, I can taste it. It has a mayo on the spoon. Is that old? You got the good old. What? Why is everything old? Oh, here we go. How many inches are there in two yards? I don't want to guess this one. How many feet are there in two yards? I know, but I'm trying to think how many feet are in a yard. I forgot. This is like, I literally learned this. Oh, I know. It's 15 years ago. Yeah, 20 feet. You're like, yeah, you learned that. You learned three feet. Hey, Siri, how many feet are in a yard? I'm just going to guess. One yard is three feet. [ Laughter ] Cheater. Okay. Three feet is 36 inches. And you said how many, what? I forget. How many? I skipped the question. How many inches are there in two yards? Okay, so 36 inches. 72. Yeah, you did. I'm good at math. Thanks, Siri. Ugh! Cheater. I didn't think she would hear me. [ Laughter ] How many sides does a quadrangle have? A quadrangle. I will never hurt his in my life. A quadrangle. That's new. Yeah. Okay, so quad is four and a triangle is three, so seven. How many sides? Seven. Four. Four. A quadrangle. Drangle. Drangle's three. Tommy! I'll try. I guess, try a story. Okay. It sounded right. Wrap it. Wrap it. Here we go. Can I get something good? Yeah. I can get something good. Give me the cheese. I don't know what this fucking spoon is. Yeah, wipe it off, please. [ Laughter ] I don't want to taste the mayonnaise again. [ Coughing ] Did you just cough on my spoon? Yeah, I did. Actually. Shit. Okay. Come on. Give me a little image of me. Oh, yeah. Is that jelly? Mm-hmm. It doesn't taste normal. Is it old? I don't think so. It says February 2025. Did you actually look? Yeah, I did. The cat. The cat. There's a fly. That'd be very third. It's probably because there's 15 different things on here. It tastes really weird. Yeah, probably. Yeah, it did taste like syrup mixed with jelly mix and mayonnaise. Yum, yum, boba. We should clean it. Yeah, we probably should. What if I know it? What was the name of the last queen of France? Fifth graders know this. Queen Elizabeth? No. Mary Antoinette. The fucking queen of what? Europe? France. I live there. Fifth graders know that one either. Mm-hmm. I can buy myself flowers. Ride my name in the sand. Keep screaming. Not to myself. Keep yelling. Oh my gosh. I don't want to blow this. Oh my gosh, I don't want to blow this. Oh my gosh, I don't want to blow this. Oh my gosh, I don't want to blow this. My gosh, I don't want to blow this. My gosh, I don't want to blow this. My gosh, I don't want to blow this. My gosh, I don't want to blow this. Oh my gosh, I don't want to blow this. My gosh, I don't want to blow this. My gosh, I don't want to blow this. My gosh, I don't want to blow this. My gosh, I don't want to blow this. My gosh, I don't want to blow this. 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My gosh, I don't want to blow this. My gosh, I don't want to blow this. My gosh, I don't want to blow this. My gosh, I don't want to blow this. My gosh, I don't want to blow this. You know, I'm just having brain fart. I already know. I had to stick it off. How close it? No, it's good. I already know. You're going to smack me with it. How close it? Okay, now you have to go away. Jesus God. There's hair. Yeah, and there's mayonnaise on it. I love cheese. I love cheese. I love turtles. Okay, last one. You might as well just give me this made up. No. Okay. Who was the president of the United States before George Bush? John F. Kennedy. Bill Clinton. Got a fuck. We already know what she's getting. Thank gosh, I didn't know all of this. Please check for mold. No. Okay. Mold me. Mold me. There's soggy with hair. Ew, I hate tomatoes. There's wiser hair all over them. I don't know. It's just in here. And there's not a date anywhere on this. I don't think they have dates on it. They should let me know. They should let me know. Check if you have mold. No. They should just let it rip. Let her eat. Yeah, I gave her one. That's not soggy. They're all soggy. Look. I just burped up teetos and it went up my nose. That hurts so bad. They made my eyes water go up. Can I spit it out? No. No. No. You have to be spitting out the boba. No. Swallow it. You're good at that. No. You're not cheating. No. You're not cheating. She's such a cheater. You told me I can't spit out the boba. You want to eat the tomato? No. Okay then. You made me eat the boba. The boba was good. It wasn't. I don't like tomatoes. I don't like mango. I don't like tomato. I love boba. I don't like mango. I don't like it. All right. That wraps up our game. I love you guys. Thanks for coming and enjoying your spot here. I hope you had a glass of wine. All right. I'll listen to the breathe throw up. Hope you take a shot. I hope you take a shot every time I say um and say I have to shit. Period. And Jesus Christ. Amen. That was disrespectful. I'm sorry God. I love you guys. I think I'm drunk off the jelly sauce. I swear God. There was no alcohol in that. I'm just kidding. I think I'm just hung over. I think it's the meds kicking in. I literally did a whole shot of teetos. Anyhoo. I'll see you at the casino. Love you.