Expanding Horizons

In Praise of Relaxation

Kris's address today: "In Praise of Relaxation" goes beyond the superficial indulgences and distractions that pass for "relaxation" in the minds of many. Kris builds for us the concept of 'Fundamental Relaxation' which is essential for our spiritual growth and the foundation of spiritual practice He asks: "How then do we achieve this relaxed state while still being intensely (fully) conscious?" Listen on for some of the practicalities of "Fundamental Relaxation". Kris concludes:- "Become the witness of all phenomena that you see - and be free!"

Duration:: 25m
Broadcast on:: 15 Sep 2024
Audio Format:: mp3

Kris's address today: "In Praise of Relaxation" goes beyond the superficial indulgences and distractions that pass for "relaxation" in the minds of many. Kris builds for us the concept of 'Fundamental Relaxation' which is essential for our spiritual growth and the foundation of spiritual practice
He asks: "How then do we achieve this relaxed state while still being intensely (fully) conscious?" Listen on for some of the practicalities of "Fundamental Relaxation".
Kris concludes:- "Become the witness of all phenomena that you see - and be free!"

[Music] You're listening to Expanding Horizons, the podcast of the Unitarian Church of South Australia, a home of progressive spirituality and free religious thought and action since 1854. The views expressed in these podcasts are those of the speaker and are not intended to represent the position of the church itself or of the worldwide Unitarian Universalist Movement. For more information visit unitariansa.org.au [Music] Now I'll invite Christine to read a short story for us, a situation described by a Buddhist nun. There is a story of a woman running away from tigers, she runs and runs and the tigers are getting closer and closer. When she comes to the edge of the cliff she sees some vines so she climbs down and holds on to the vines. Looking down she sees there are tigers below as well. She then notices that a mouse is gnawing away at the vine to which she is clinging. She also sees beautiful bunch of strawberries close to her, growing out of a clump of grass. She looks up and she looks down, she looks at the mouse, then she just takes a strawberry in her mouth and enjoys it thoroughly. Tigers above, tigers below. This is actually the predicament we are always in, in terms of birth and death. Each moment is just what it is. It might be the only moment of our life. It might be the only strawberry we will ever eat. We could get depressed about it or we could finally appreciate it and delight in the preciousness of every single moment of our life. [Music] [Music] In the passing parade of life we see friends and family come and go. As loved ones leave us, for a short time or a long time let us have peace, let us be at peace. Let us be grateful for all the care and affection and love that we receive from our friends and family and indeed from people who appear to be complete strangers. Despite the horrors we see and hear about, let us be grateful for these everyday acts of kindness, just such a great blessing to us and the whole community. Let us be grateful. So may it be. Thank you. Now I'd like to invite Tracy to come up and give a reading for today from the Buddhist monk, Thich Makhan. Maybe you have a habit of worrying. Even if you know it's neither necessary nor useful, you still worry. You'd like to ban worry and get rid of it because you know that when you worry you can't get in touch with the wonders of life and you can't be happy. So you get angry at your worry, you don't want it. But worry is a part of you, all of us, and that's why when your worry comes up, you have to know how to handle it, tenderly and peacefully. You can do it if you have the energy of mindfulness. You cultivate the energy of mindfulness with mindful breathing and mindful walking. And with that energy you can recognise and tenderly embrace your worry, fear and anger. Thank you. Now I offer some reflections on the topic of relaxation. I'm sure you've been so anxious and excited to come here today and hear about relaxation. Well, real relaxation is commonly misunderstood. True relaxation is the foundation for spiritual practice. Probably all of us understand the concept of physical relaxation. And indeed, while you're sitting here, just take stock for a moment, take the opportunity to let go of any unnecessary tension in your shoulders, your arms and legs, your neck, have a little stretch if you want to. Because if you're going to listen to someone talk about relaxation, you might as well be relaxed. When we hold on to tension, sometimes it's just a chemical thing that we haven't exercised muscles, the carbon dark side builds up, and we feel like stretching, and if we don't, we carry that tension. Sometimes it's a defence mechanism because we're in an uncomfortable situation, we have an emotional reaction against something in the environment or a person, a conversation, and rather than expressing that discomfort, we hold it inside and it translates into physical tension. And sometimes people are tense about things in the future. Mark Twain declared, "I've had a lot of worries in my life, most of which have never happened." And I suppose a lot of us can relate to that. So physical tension, that's easy to understand. But when I talk about relaxation being commonly misunderstood, I'm talking about the way people often use the word, especially when they talk about relaxing after work, if they've had a day in the office or the hospital or policing the streets or something, and they said, "Well, I went home and relaxed." But quite often, it's not really relaxing the mind. It's just a method of distraction. And TV is probably the most common sort of thing. Maybe reading a detective novel. Maybe having an alcoholic drink, which at least has a sedative effect, but it's not the same as truly relaxing the mind. Distracting the person perhaps from more serious issues and occupying the mind with trivial issues. But who really cares if there's a deal or no deal? The topic today is really more about a fundamental kind of relaxation, a relaxation in terms of life itself, being relaxed about the whole human experience that we go through, the highs and the lows, the joys and the concerns, the suffering, the grief. Imagine, for a moment, if you can, that when you were born, you fell off a very high cliff and then imagine that you found a large rock next to you. And so you cling onto it for dear life, thinking that it will offer some protection against the fall, but of course, it can't really make any difference to what's happening. And as we hurt all through life towards the passing out of this life, we are in that situation. There is an inevitability about it. And we hold on to all these things along the way, often rather than embracing what is about to before us in any given day or in the context of our whole life. What is the value of holding on? When I talk about relaxing, taking a relaxed approach to life, I'm certainly not talking about just becoming a vegetable, sitting on the bed, doing nothing, making no effort to do anything, because in our lives, we are compelled, the spirit of life drives us on to engage with people and to take care of the physical needs that we have at the very least. But of course, we have social needs and we have duties. What in India is called Dharma, we have things we need to do. And if we are relaxed, we probably have a better sense of what we do need to achieve in a day and those things which are unnecessary, which are indulgences or distractions. As the stream of life carries us along, we can fight against the current and we can perhaps delay the inevitable. But the other way of living is to embrace the current, to go with it, to float. When people float in the water, they don't hold on to the water. They don't grasp it. In fact, it's by letting go that they are better able to float. And one can say, "Well, I don't want to just be carried along by other people telling me what to do. It's not about that either." By being truly relaxed in our approach to life, we have a better sense of where the stream is taking us, whatever other people might say. And to go one step further, there can be a realization that we are not even separate from the stream, but part of that stream of life. There is something very special that comes out of a relaxed approach to life. And it's hard to believe it unless you've experienced it. It goes beyond what is purely rational. Most people here, today, value, reason, quite properly so, as a means of navigating life and making those day-to-day decisions we need to make. And I don't want to detract from that, but what I'm suggesting is that there is actually something profoundly valuable in going beyond reason, at least being open to that, which is beyond reason, allowing a full realization of the joy of life, allowing us to be closer to God. Reason can take us to the harbor, but we at one point need to get in the little boat and push off into the unknown in a great adventure which is full of joy. T. S. Eliot had a go at explaining this in part of his poem, Burnt Norton, which is part of the Four Quartets, a collection of poems. Because these things are impossible to put into words exactly, sometimes poetry is the nearest approximation other than silence. So we'll enjoy a bit more music after I've read this passage from T. S. Eliot. At the still point of the turning world, neither flesh nor fleshless, neither from nor towards. At the still point there the dance is, but neither arrest nor movement, and do not call it fixity where past and future are gathered, neither movement from nor towards, neither ascent nor decline, except for the point, the still point. There would be no dance, and there is only the dance. I can only say there we have been, but I cannot say where, and I cannot say how long, for that is to place it in time. The inner freedom from the practical desire, the release from action and suffering, released from the inner and the outer compulsion, yet surrounded by a grace of sense, a white light still and moving, our heaven without motion. Concentration without elimination, both a new world and the old made explicit, understood in the completion of its partial ecstasy, the resolution of its partial horror. Yet the enchantment of past and future, woven in the weakness of the changing body, protects humankind from heaven and damnation which flesh cannot endure. Time past and time future allow but a little consciousness. To be conscious is not to be in time, but only in time can the moment in the rose garden, the moment in the arbor with a rainbeats, the moment in the draftey church at smokefall be remembered, involved with past and future, only through time time is conquered. [Music] [Music] Grounded in a philosophical or spiritual understanding when we allow ourselves to take a completely relaxed approach to life, something miraculous happens, something inexplicable. It opens up experiences which go beyond our preconceptions. It allows discernible synchronicity. It allows us to experience that we are in the right place at the right time. It gives us opportunities to be wise and kind and loving. How then do we achieve the relaxed state to which I refer while still being conscious and intensely so? Let's hear some comments from those who have gone before us. The Roman Marcus Aurelius of Stoic disposition, when speaking of how one content the divine spirit within, wrote in his book of meditations, one must keep oneself pure from all violent passion and evil affection, from all rationalness and vanity, and from all manner of discontent. The American writer, Ray Bradbury, said learning to let go should be learned before learning to get. Life should be touched, not strangled. You've got to relax, let it happen at times and at others move forward with it. The great Persian poet, Rumi, concluded, peaceful is the one who's not concerned with having more or less, unbound by name and fame. This one is free from sorrow, from the world and mostly from their own identity. Last week we heard from Vani Shukla, a local yoga practitioner. She said that the practice of yoga was an aspect of spiritual experience rather than spiritual experience, being an aspect of yoga. The French Jesuit theologian Pierre Paillarden said something similar, quote, "We are not human beings, having a spiritual experience, we are spiritual beings, having a human experience." The more we can hold our human experience in perspective, the more relaxed we are about the outcomes of our human experience, the more open we are to spiritual experience. There are some practical steps we can take. An obvious step is not entering into relationships and environments of conflict if one can help them. But sometimes one's duty, one's dharma, compels one to be in a fraught situation. Practical tips, be cautious and considered before speaking, if possible. It actually helps to consciously slow down one's physical movements to induce a less reactive response to a provocative situation. Then there is meditation, which is to be encouraged. If one persists with meditation, it can indeed set the foundation for spiritual growth. It can allow the quietness of mind, which allows inspiration and intuition to flourish. I finish by quoting a lengthy passage from Silence of the Heart by Robert Adams, a 20th century American mystic who followed a Vedic or, one could say, Hindu philosophy. Draw from this what you will. You must want to be free. It must become first with you before anything else. Everything that you've done all your life is only a game. A game you're playing with yourself, only it seems to be real. The only reality is the self and you are that. Why look for anything else? Everything else will take care of itself. You've got to abide in the self, just in the self. Everything else will take care of itself in a beautiful way. You are boundless space, like the ocean, like the sky, all pervasive. This is your real nature, but for some reason you believe you are a body confined to a small space. This is not you. It's illusion. You are all pervading absolute reality. This is your true nature. This is who you really are. Just by thinking about these things all the time, something begins to happen to you, something wonderful. Do not think about the weather or about the day's work or your problems. For all the thinkers, who thinks? Find out who has the problems. Find out who you really are. Who am I? It's up to you to awaken from this mortal dream. You can keep ongoing like you are right now with the good things and bad things, yet you live in a universe of dualities, which means for every good there is a bad. For every bad there is good. It's a false world in which you live. You need to awaken to this truth. Be aware of yourself always. The world goes through its own karma. It has absolutely nothing to do with you. You belong to God. Everything you see is God. This is why you should be non-judgmental. Leave everything alone. By practicing these things, you become radiantly happy. Everyone wants something. If your mind stops thinking, what happens? Some of you believe you will not have anything, that you'll have more problems, but it's in reverse. You experience bliss, joy and happiness when you don't want anything. From what we know, people want something and when they get it, they become more miserable than ever before. Nothing is wrong. Everything is right just the way it is. Don't try to understand this or figure it out. Leave it alone. It will happen by itself by keeping yourself quiet and still. You quiet the mind because of realization. Let it become. In all situations, become. Let it be still and quiet. When the mind becomes still, the world begins to disappear and you're in divine harmony and joy. Therefore, happiness comes to you when you stop thinking, when you stop judging, when you stop being afraid, when you begin to contemplate what is happiness. All the answers are within you. Everything you're looking for is within you. Everything. Nobody can help but yourself. Know who you are. You are the power. All the power of the universe is within you. You have all the power you need. All is well, exceedingly well. It has always been well. It will always be well. Become the witness of all phenomena that you see and be free. [Music] [Music] [Applause] Thank you, Brendan. [Applause] Doring on my finger. My prayer is that you go out of here today relaxed and that you find a way to keep a relaxed approach to life and perhaps even dare to go beyond reason.