Alpha Encounter

3 Self Worth

Children can encounter God through the value of Self Worth

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Duration:: 18m
Broadcast on:: 09 Sep 2024
Audio Format:: mp3

(upbeat music) Welcome to episode three of Alpha Encounter. It's a thunderstorm right now as I'm recording. So hopefully you can hear nothing or you can just hit a pattern of relaxing rain in the background whilst myself, Mike, and a bit of a friend, Jess. I'm gonna talk through how we can help children to encounter God in assembly through the value of self-worth. This episode relies quite heavily on the free beyond belief assembly resource, which you can download from spinnaker.org.uk. But before we get into any of that, I've got a little throwback to our first episode where we talked about how children can meet with God through values in general. My good friend Katie was telling me how she linked the school values more strongly to the active prayer by having each value written on the heart and asking volunteers from the children to put their heart into the treasure box. And thank God for each specific value as they went along. So thanks Katie for that. And if you have any different or better ideas about the various things that we talk about, then please do get in touch with me through the emails spinnaker.org.uk or through all the socials. So this is actually a really important topic self-worth. It's not a traditional value. - It's not a common school value. You don't see it up on the walls of schools very much. Self-worth. - But I think it is something that more and more I'm recognizing this is a generation that needs to develop self-worth and a sense of identity and knowing who they are and not relying on other people to give them their word. I think so much of our culture looks to likes or shares to give us worth and value that we're only valuable if other people feel that way about us but we want the children to know that they are valuable just for who they are and to be able to value themselves. - My son is six years old and he nabbed my phone the other day and made his own YouTube video. He didn't go on YouTube but that's what he thought of hunting a toad. There's like about 45 minutes of him just saying like and subscribe. - It is part of that just naturally ingrained in the culture now of phrasing, isn't it? - Yep. - So that's a really, do you think? Although if you would like to subscribe to our podcast. - Oh yes, oh yes, do like and subscribe. Ah, I gotta get that in. So your self-worth and we've linked it to confidence and self-esteem as well. - Absolutely. And I think one of the things really interesting and I picked up on when we were reading through this pack is in the reflection. There's space to think about the fact that some days our self-worth can be low. Sometimes if you're asked how you feel about yourself you might say something negative and actually self-worth is something that really fluctuates and that's a natural thing. - Yeah. - But really if it was a word we would be talking about God-worth. - Yeah, absolutely. - And how God values us and the fact that God's valuing of us does not change. That we are always loved by God. No matter what we do, no matter where we go. Even if we're in space. God loves us and values us and God wants us to know that we are loved and valuable. And that's something that really comes across in this pack. We talk about that verse where it talks about God knowing how many hairs are on our head which is one of my favorite verses in the Bible. I just think it's such a powerful image. 'Cause I don't know how many hairs are on my head. I've got no idea. I know that when I go to- - That's a good point, I don't know. - When I go to the head versus they tell me it's a lot. - I've noticed what colours they're going. But I don't know specifically how many. - I noticed how many come out in my hairbrush. But yeah, it's a really amazing thing to remember that God knows us better than we know ourselves. - We opened this reflection with a relatively dangerous question. - It is. I took a bit of a sharp intake of breath when I read it. - So the question is, what words would you use to describe yourself? - Yeah, and I think it's worth being prepared for the fact that some children might answer with quite negative words. - Yeah, I think we'd expect people to say like fast or smart, but I think I would also expect kids to maybe say like ugly or useless. - Yes, so you always get one child who will know how to play it for laughs. And we'll probably say a thing designed to get it off. But you also might just get some real honesty from children. - Yeah, and I think that it's really important that these answers are just taken as absolutely valid and taken like at face value. - Yeah, I wouldn't want any child to feel that their answer wasn't the right answer because it's about how they feel. But I also want to be able to make the space to go by the end of this collective worship this time, I wonder what new words you would have picked up. And also, it's a really helpful reminder of that partnership that we have with schools in terms of safeguarding. Many of the time that I've had a response in an assembly and I've looked across and made eye contact with a teacher and shared the nod of, yeah, we've picked up on that. That wasn't a very positive thing or maybe that's something they want to follow up. - Yeah, if they say something that sort of puts them down, then that's a flag to check up on, yeah. - And what a privilege to be in spaces where they feel they can share, honestly, and we get opportunities to be part of that process. - Definitely not. - So, the story, now this is where it will get to be tricky. - It's not a story. - Yes, there is not a story for this collective worship. We've focused on a psalm, which is-- - The Psalm. - The Psalm, Psalm 139. What a shock. - Which contains that wonderful line about being made in a fearful and wonderful way. And so, we wanted to keep that sense of it being a poem or being a psalms, because I feel it's really important that children know about the different types of writing that we can encounter in the Bible. But the original Psalm, great though it is, does not lend itself necessarily to children engaging with it. - You know, it doesn't rhyme like the graph. - It doesn't rhyme. - And that's what I feel that was missing. So, we have created our own kind of take on it. Our own writing version. And something that we've suggested you could try is, at the end of some of the lines, leaving a gap and letting the children fill in the final word of the line. So, I'm going to-- - We're building here on the very traditional angle can call and response. - Absolutely. So, should we give this a go, Mike? - You're going. - Are we going to leave a pause? Are you going to try and fill in the gaps? - You do the pause and I will-- - In fact, I'm not even going to look at the words here. - I see if you can do it with everything. - God, you know everything I do. There's nothing that isn't seen by you. You know when I'm happy or when I am blue, when I sleep in my bed, when I go to the-- - Lou. - Zoo, yeah, no it isn't. (laughing) You know what I'll say before I even do. There's nothing that isn't seen by you. - Exactly. - Did you find another one? - Yeah, go on, go on. - God, you know everything about me. There's nowhere I can go that you won't be. If I can't up a mountain or swim in the-- - See? - If I visit the shops or an art gallery, if I fly in a rocket through the far-- - Galaxy? - There's nowhere I can go that you won't be. - Be. (laughing) - Amazing. - Nice, yeah, I love it. And I think what would be really great is if we just channel our inner garage MC, add some beats, it's going to be a rocking-- - Get a teacher up to be close. - At worship. (laughing) - Fantastic, I love that. So we talked a little bit about the reflection and the passage itself. - Yes. - And with all of these different beyond belief materials, we're starting with a suggestion of an object listener. Specific, tangible thing we can bring in, children can look at. - So the object suggesting is exclusively for the very wealthy, it's a diamond. - Yes, if you, those diamonds that you've been keeping in those cupboards-- - There's maps in rocks. - Yep. - If you don't have a diamond, what do you suggest we do? - We've got some printables. - We have lots of very large pictures of diamonds that you can print. - If you print them up a picture, tell them it's sparkly. - Absolutely. - No, it's a gem or a diamond. Or, you know, if you've got something in your house, something similar, but the principal point here is that you look at a diamond, you know this is valuable. Like, it's inherently a symbol of perfection and value. - Absolutely, something that you can look at and go, wow, that is really valuable. And I guess by the end of the collective worship, we hope that they will think that off themselves. - Yeah, yeah. - When they look at them, they'll say, wow, that has-- - The link for me is that just in the way that we look at a gem and we know what that means, that we look at a human and we know that means perfection. It means value. It means something of preciousness and substance. This is just an innate knee jerk knowing because you're looking at a human being. - Absolutely, I think of that perfection. There's a verse in Ephesians that is mentioned in the reflection about we are God's masterpiece. - Yes. - That we're not sort of sub-standard, that we're not just about all right, but that God says we're a masterpiece, that we are created in God's image, and that God values that are worth is huge. We're more valuable than a diamond. - And we've suggested sort of a game entry here, which takes different kinds of gems, and we've got Ruby, Sapphire, Emerald, Diamond, and connecting it to their value. - Yeah, and those kind of introducing that idea of positive and affirming words that can describe people that where self-worth comes from. - The activity is to take a diamond and say, oh, I think, so immediately I'm struggling here. - Dazzling. - Dazzling diamond, and then you get a child up and their name is Eric, and you say you are energetic Eric. - Extremely energetic. - Extremely energetic. - Yeah, it's about thinking of those positive words that link with the first letter of the gem's all name. - These types of games can be quite tricky. They require you to think on your feet fast, and also I'm not always sure that they're particularly fun for the other 200 kids observing. - If like me, sometimes you only have Key Stage One, and a lot of blank faces from their games with the really young ones. So if you were doing this, Mike, what might you do as a slightly more? - Thinking of on the fly here. - It was the sort of the God knows how many hairs in your head thing that I thought, this is about attentiveness. It's about, it's such devotion because you have such value that God knows how many hairs are on your head, and I'd love to do like a game around that sort of attentiveness concept. I think maybe I would do like a counting game of our own. I would get two children up the front, and one at a time they have to name a body part, ear, and next child is like nose, and next child is like tooth, and next child is eyeball. It's all around the head for me. But they're not allowed to repeat. So it's a back and forth game, no arms, no pauses, all that sort of business. - No repetition, deviation. - Exactly. But all the children watching can count how many body parts we get to. So there's something that they are all involved in as well. - Absolutely. When I look at this, I have a whole box of gems, unfortunately fake, that I keep in my church office for just this sort of occasion. And I love the idea of some kind of treasure-seeking, counting game with grabbing how many red gems you can get, how many green gems, and maybe having a team challenge to get a few more people involved. - That's fine. I don't have that pile of gems. I do have a pile of body parts. (laughing) - That's my other cover. - Yeah, yeah, and we've got this prayer activity at the end, which I just, it's one of my favorite ones, actually. I think it's really lovely. And it's really straightforward. You put your hand in front of you, your digits stock out, and you imagine yourself on the palm, and each digit is representing something important in your life. One of those, I'll say the thumb, maybe we make the thumb gold as well, but you just simply and slowly, you close your palm, your fingers, and they're just giving you a hug in your palm. And I just think that's so wonderful. - Absolutely, that great picture of knowing the people around you who value you as well and the value you have. Now, there's something that we have talked about that comes up in this, which we have different viewpoints on, which is this question of affirmations. - Yes. - So, affirmations traditionally, speaking positive things over yourself. - Yeah, I don't really do that. And I don't understand (laughing) what the appeal is for people to do. I think it's really, when I read this, I got quite excited, 'cause there's a video that I have used before, which is of a father giving morning motivations to his young daughter before she goes to school, encouraging her to speak positive things over herself. I am strong, I am powerful. And I think, actually, potentially that's something that children don't know how to do. - Yeah. - And sometimes it's just helpful to have a reminder of who God says that you are and what your identity is. 'Cause I think sometimes in the challenging times, we can forget that. - I think that's the important distinction. It's, for me, it really is about who God says you are. I think when we encourage children to say, "I am strong, I am this, I am that," it's a real pressure, you know, as we've said already, like you're not always in the mood. And I know faking it 'til you're making it. I have no problem with that, you know, saying these things sort of, I start believing them eventually, but it still feels like an additional thing I have to do when I'm collapsing a little bit. And it's the truth that God said it to me. That is the affirmation, not this sort of, you know, this almost sort of ego rubbing. - Yeah. And I think that's a real challenge, isn't it? We do want them to rely on God for that. That even in the times when you might not feel strong or brave, that God says those things are true about you, I have a set of stickers that I use with our kids that all of the things that the Bible says are true about them. So I am powerful, I am loved, I am guided. And I have one on the back of my phone case that I got the child to pick one out for me and stuck it on there and they chose I am a winner. And I'm like, that is the one I think I struggle with the most. And every time I see it, I go, "Am I?" But God says it's true. And actually that encouraging children that even when they might not feel it, knowing who God says they are is such a powerful tool for them. - All of these things have come out of the overflow of our heart and where our heart is at. And I'm absolutely not knocking somebody who's so full of self-confidence and esteem that they can't help but say these things are, that is beautiful. But it's more, I just don't think the words are the answer. It's your heart that is the answer. - Absolutely. And I think that's something with self-worth and self-confidence when we talk about these things, it's got to be internal, it can't just be surface level. - Yeah. - That thing of, you know, man looks on the outside but God looks on the heart, he knows. And we need to dig deep. That's what we're encouraging children to do with these values is not just think surface level but dig deep. What does it look like to go beyond belief? So I can say I'm valuable but then what does it look like to put that into practice too? - Which is why I think this early question about like what words you use is such a helpful litmus test. So the staff can work out where their kids are at. Maybe it's something to follow up again afterwards. - Yeah, absolutely as a kind of follow up activities for them to do during the week. Like kind of check in every day, can you ask that question? And there's some great songs that have been suggested for this. Real bops going on. - For our pop banger coming in, it's a. ♪ Such for the hero inside yourself ♪ - I love that. - It is a, you know, it's a strong, strong start. - I feel like we're playing an important part in introducing Generation Alpha to songs as well as, go on to the break. - I was gonna say a bony M just then but it's not bony M is it? - No, no. - It's M people. (laughing) And for a singing song, it's I am amazing and wonderfully made. - Which is not what I know but you played a bit for me earlier and I really enjoyed it. - Yeah, it's got like a bit of a funky sort of new urban beats to it. - Yeah, but it's inspired by that verse from Psalm 139 that we're focusing on. So it's really great to get those words into kids heads. - I was gonna say it's a singing song. It's not, it's a shouty song. - Fantastic. So I'm gonna throw one more thing in at the end which is freebie resource. - Woo. - So these all the beyond belief resources are free. - Yes they are. - And freely available on the Spinnaker Trust website. You will need to set up an account. - Go on, but talk about yours. - Yes, but my website www.foundationstones.co.uk. - Say that again. - www.foundationstones.co.uk has an entire pack of identity resources. So the stickers that I mentioned but we also created a completely free resource of prayer space activities. So there are 24 different prayer space activities based on things that God says in the Bible are true about our identity. So if this is something that you go, actually this is something we want our children to be hearing more about. We wanna dive more deeply into this. We want to do an epic follow up activity. Do go and check those out. Think about whether you could create a prayer space or use some of those resources to keep building on this image. - Yeah, yeah, just the stuff is fantastic. - Yes, a do go check out Jesse's Foundation Stones resource. And of course you can get a whole ton of stuff at Spinnaker for free as well. Let me know what you think of this podcast for what you'd like or if you're only different or better or happier ways of sharing and helping children to encounter God. I will be so happy to bring them up in future podcasts. (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (gentle music) (gentle music)