Rabbi Joey Soffer Shiurim
Shaare Teshuva-11
Ok, good morning, everybody. Today is September 18th, we are on page noon. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I have to keep in your mind the sin that you have done. I have to forget about it, try to remember it, so you feel better than you did. I have to keep in your mind the sin that you have done, don't forget about it, don't forget about it. You should not remove it from your heart, your heart is to change really, you should not come out of your heart until you are gone. I know my sins, I know what I did wrong and it's in front of my face all the time. I know what I did wrong and it's in front of my face all the time. I have to stop sinning, that's the part of life, it's very nice if you feel bad and you verbalize it, but if you don't stop sinning, there is nothing that is going to work, so you have to stop. He says, "I have to stop sinning, I have to stop". Even when you have that, you have to peak of desire, you want to do it and you stop. I'm not saying that you have to stop sinning, I'm not saying that you have to stop sinning, I'm not saying that you have to stop sinning, I'm not saying that you have to stop sinning, I'm not saying that you have to stop sinning, I'm not saying that you have to stop sinning. He said, "I'm not saying that you have to stop sinning, I'm not saying that you have to stop sinning, I'm not saying that you have to stop sinning, I'm not saying that you have to stop sinning, I'm not saying that you have to stop sinning." You were attacked by the Esarah, you had the opportunity to do the sin, you have the power to do the sin, it's the same like you sinned before. If you did the sin when you were 21, and then you're 94 and you can barely stand up and the same opportunity protects yourself, it's a little bit easier to refrain when you're 94 than when you're 21. If you were afraid when you were 21, but then you were afraid when you were 22, no more have the strength to sin anymore, you can't go to that issue. It's never too late, I'm not saying no, it's never too late, I'm just saying that to consider this person a real boss, is that I have to be exactly the same circumstance, exactly the same circumstance. Not some other outside force that's easier for me not to sin, just have to come around. The team in the same situation, I don't know what it's just saying, I'm never going to do that again. You can say I'm never going to do it, I'm never going to do it again, it's very nice, but we don't know if that's a real tissue bar until it was tested. How do you know it's real? Until it was tested, how do you know it's real? I did it, I stopped, I'm not doing this anymore. One of the things, he says, he says, "As of who filed tissue bar, I told my god, to stand in front of my shim absolutely purehearted, that I know I made absolute perfect tissue bar, this is what it means to be tested." Oh yeah, you can be a filed tissue bar, very nice, I'm just going to forgive you. Are you really, really fully, there's no way to know, until you test it, right? That's what he says over here. He puts himself in a situation every day, every day, every day, every day, he says, "Make it beautiful, make it beautiful, put a perfume, dress it up, and put a lot of work in front of you." I don't know if it should be, but he has the strength to do this, he has the strength to do this, he has the strength to do this. He has the strength to do this, because of the strength of his fear of Hashem. It never happened, I made tissue bar, never had the opportunity to be tested, so now what? You need to keep building a conditional, you have fear of God. You need to keep building a conditional, you have fear of God. When you become older, you lose some of the strength. At this time, your eye will be strong enough to help you overcome the attack. Hashem knows really what's inside your heart. He knows, right? If you come to this test again, as you had the first time, you have to keep building a conditional, and that's the way you can get. You have to keep building a conditional, and that's the way you can get. You have to keep building a conditional, and that's the way you can get. Over here, your Hashem, fear of God, will help me to turn away from the evil. God will help you with the year that you've built into yourself already, to turn away from the sin when the opportunity presents itself. You have to keep building a conditional, and you have to keep building a conditional, so now you have to keep building a conditional. Why do you write a word in the pasture, the fear of God, and the fear of God, is the fear of God. Because if it fits the universe carefully, it should say, what happens when you turn away from the pasture, what happens when you turn away from the pasture? It says, what's causing you to turn away from the sours. It's the year that is the sours, that's what he's saying. It's the year that you have to turn away from the pasture, and you have to turn away from the pasture, turn away from the pasture. You have to turn away from the pasture, you have to turn away from the pasture, you have to turn away from the pasture, you have to turn away from the pasture. Okay, so he's playing with etymology for us a little bit over here. Look at the bottom in the burem, we'll start from "resh kaf". What's he intended to teach us? Is this part of instruction? Tell you, hey, do good, don't do evil, or is this pursuit of result? It's telling you, the result of swimming out. It's not telling you, it's not telling you, oh, choose to turn away, it's telling you, oh, you're putting it on, you will turn away. What? That the eyes, what's giving the power to be able to turn away from it, it's not saying, oh, be a good boy, and when something bad happens, don't do it, no, no, it's telling you, you're a good boy, when something happens, you're not going to do it. That's the reason. Okay, fine. Okay. [singing in foreign language] Person who was passing, didn't sit when he had the opportunity, gets the word as if he did a mitzvah. How was that, could be possible? I'm not doing anything, I'm just being passive, I'm getting the word to do it. I didn't know what to do with that, because yeah, I did a mitzvah, I did a mitzvah, I thought I was passing, right? So, I thought I was saying, oh, it's what I was passing, don't do this, how do we fulfill it, but I'm not doing it, I'm passing. Over here, if you have an opportunity to sit, you need to do the same, so you get the reward for the mitzvah, fine. I have to sit up everything what we learned. What? What we say, build the fence around it, it's like you don't think an alcohol can sound, give it up out, all the coffee, and the bar. That's what he's saying, that's what he's saying. An alcoholic guy, right? There's two ways to listen, I'll use your alcohol, it's him. He's not saying, he's not saying, don't go to the bar, or he's saying, he's not going to go to the bar. He's saying, when you're walking down the block, and it's inevitable you're going to pass the bar, right? So, that's the test. The test is not to go with the bar and sit there and watch everybody drink. Opportunity, yeah, stop. Opportunity to sin. If I stay away from the bar altogether, isn't that also? So, let me ask you a question, right? Let's continue with the example that you brought. The other guy was an alcoholic, he goes to rehab. He goes to rehab now, and he's clean for five years. They were hanging out with his friends. They were drinking, clean. One day, comes to the office, it's a disaster situation, it's crazy, it doesn't have to do. He walks by the bar. That was good. If the guy goes in there right now, right? So, according to your example, you want to say, build a fence, build a fence. The guy built a fence. He went to rehab, he's five years clean, he built a fence. Do I know that he needs tissue rapidly, that he's not an alcoholic anymore? I don't know until that day, when he's tested and he doesn't go with it. He goes in, all the fence in the world didn't help, but he climbed over the fence, he had the fence. Great, not saying not to build a fence. I'm just saying that the fence, you don't know if it's a real fence until the day is tested. That's what you know. That's what he's saying here. Great, of course you have to stay away. Don't try to, don't let yourself, especially when you're weak in the beginning, right? If he was tested, let's say, three months in, with this scenario, three months into his sobriety, much higher chance that he's going to fail. Five years in, okay, maybe he's got a little more, right? He's going to go to his meeting, he's got all those chips, right? Then I got my two month, I took my time, I got a five year chip now, right? So, so now, the question now is, what's going to happen to him that day? That's the day, that's the real test. So I showed him he's not going to give the guy a test in the first week or two months. You're building up your lock, you're building up your lock, you're building up the fear, you're building your fear bus, right? Okay, now I showed him, you know what, I really want to, I want this guy to type the real reward. Let's see what he does, when you get that test, and you pass it now, you know, it's got four tissue bars, right? Absolutely, it's stronger, it's stronger, exactly, that's right. Okay, good. (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) Help others to make tissue bad public, right? (speaking in foreign language) If you can help others to stop sitting, you can have others to make tissue bad? For you, boom, automatic. (speaking in foreign language) This is one of the foundations of the car of tissue bad. It's true, but not only about tissue bad, it's true about a lot of things. If you ask Hashem to do something, "Yoh Hashem, I want to be able to do this." And the thing you're asking for is, is, is, is a benefit for the, for the Nabim? Hashem gives it to you. (speaking in foreign language) You want to help my kids? No problem. (speaking in foreign language) I want to put your kids in business. (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) I want to help your kids. (speaking in foreign language) What do you mean? (speaking in foreign language) So if you're coming here now and he says, you want to help others make tissue bad? (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) You have an obligation from the Torah to rebuke your friends, right? So that you don't carry their sin. That's a whole 'nother class altogether, not getting into it. Now how to give rebuke, when to give rebuke, okay? Assume that you did it the right way, which is most people don't and can't. So before you do anything, go and come ask. But in the, (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) If you had the opportunity to rebuke somebody, you had the ability to rebuke somebody, you knew how to do it properly, and you didn't, and you let them sin, that's your sin. (speaking in foreign language) The other person, (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) Let me teach the sinners your ways, (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) But again, it's a very, very delicate subject that's worth it. It's worthy of a short of weeks, of how to give proper, (speaking in foreign language) Maybe when you come to the church in the Torah, maybe we'll give a short on how to do that. (speaking in foreign language) I'm encouraging it if it's done the right way. If it's not done the right way, keep your mouth shut, don't say anything. Very few people, I'm saying, I said it clearly. If you don't know how to do it, shut your mouth. So why would you teach that class? Because I tell you why, because if people know how to do it the right way, the right way can help, I'm going to say it tremendously. They help everybody, bring everybody closer, get it in the right way. You have to be able to do it to someone that you know is going to listen. It has to be someone, someone you know is going to listen to you when you say it. If you know they're not going to listen to you, keep your mouth shut. That's number one rule. Number one rule. (speaking in foreign language) But, so it's very, very, very delicate topic about, don't go running out and yelling everybody. I'll tell you a story with your children. I'll tell you a story happened to me, some of the zealots, I think I saw this one story once before I saw it right. But there was a story I was walking down the street on Shabbat, I was carrying a bag. (speaking in foreign language) I'll rewind the story first. The first Shabbat, it all came out. I called my rabbi, called up to him on aloof. I said Rabbi, tell me about the eloof. It says 100% culture. I said Rabbi, I never carried in my life. Is it okay if I let my wife push the carriage instead of me? He says no, no. You push the carriage. I said Rabbi. (speaking in foreign language) She puts the carriage? She says no. You push the carriage. Okay. I said Rabbi, I'll tell you the eloof is perfect. I said okay, fine. I started using, I started using eloof. I finished my rabbi. I said eloof. I finished my rabbi. One, Shabbat, two, three years later. I'm walking to my mother-in-law. We're taking a cake, a dessert, whatever it was that we could have for the Shabbat lunch. (speaking in foreign language) Some guy in the street corner of every U.S. of the ocean park, right? (speaking in foreign language) Stop screaming at me. (speaking in foreign language) Shabbat! (speaking in foreign language) Scream in the street. (speaking in foreign language) A friend? Not a friend. Not a friend. An acquaintance. An acquaintance. You know me. You know me. (speaking in foreign language) Turn to the guy. I said eloof. (speaking in foreign language) I said my rabbi says eloof is cautious. (speaking in foreign language) (gunshot) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) That's what he's screaming on the street corner. Without any, there's no way I'm listening to you when you come screaming at me at number one. Even if I was doing something wrong, I wasn't listening to you. When I come and answer you back, a logical answer. You can't scream back, oh. That's an extreme example of how not to give talk. Not that extreme. And every time I see the guy in the street, I want to go back here. (speaking in foreign language) No, no. (speaking in foreign language) He was absolutely wrong. (speaking in foreign language) But in his mind, he's following the pursue. (speaking in foreign language) Why is he coming to talk to the other? What do you think? What do you think? He thinks that's how you give talk to the guy. It's absolutely extreme example of what not to do. Not to do. (speaking in foreign language) I never told you this one. (speaking in foreign language) Okay. Fine. Anyway. (speaking in foreign language) But that's not the way to do it. (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) We're done. He says the (speaking in foreign language) with the foundations (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) I'd like to talk about a little bit things that were potentially prevent you from making tissue back. (speaking in foreign language) Someone who is going to always falter, right, is going to remove from his yoke, right? All these issues that we've discussed about. (speaking in foreign language) It's very difficult to make tissue back. (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) If you fail, then one of them. Pray. (speaking in foreign language) Right, gather your strength. (speaking in foreign language) To be able to keep all these foundations we've talked about. (speaking in foreign language) Right, you'll continue to increase your knowledge. (speaking in foreign language) Right, when we talk about in the fourth chapter, all the actual (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) I mean, I think I'm going to save the fourth chapter for (speaking in foreign language) And that's the (speaking in foreign language) of the whole (speaking in foreign language) And we'll do that maybe during (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) Okay, (speaking in foreign language) He says now (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) I'm going to list them for you now. (speaking in foreign language) 24 things in a row. Things that will make it very difficult for you to make tissue back. Okay, which is make this list and make sure you have none of these (speaking in foreign language) What are they? (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) Okay, take that, that's just gossiping. Gossiping, even if it's true, dropping from one person that tells the story that, "Hey, this guy would happen here." (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) People speak about your friend. Sharing information that's detrimental. (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) is anger. (speaking in foreign language) Guy who is, you know, is conniving in his mind. Let's figure out how to do this. (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) Guy who wants to join the (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) It's gonna be good for me people. (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) Guy who continues to go and eat by people that don't have enough food for themselves. (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) The whole lick in the ganav. The guy who shares the spoils of the ganav. That one should be on the first one. The guy who says, "I know it's okay, I can sing." I said, "I'll make this you man, no problem." "I'll sing, I'll sing." So you know, I really want to eat this. I'll eat it now. I don't want to make this you man, 20 minutes, no problem. It's good. I don't want to make this you man, anyone who says you're going to think you're going to sing and I'm going to make this you man, and my speaking biadola sort of this you man. Hashem doesn't allow this you man for you to happen. It makes that slope very slippery. It's very hard to go up the slide when it's greased. Get a climb up the slide, finish. You just pour all the oil on the slide, and you think you're going to climb upwards. It doesn't work that way. It's okay. Once a year, I go to the cleaners and launch your mat, cleans everything. And then they jump people out and come out, sparkles shiny new. Come outside the other side. It's okay, I can do whatever I want. They come out and they jump people out. And they jump people and they jump in. That doesn't work for that person. This one needs a lot of work. People who are the way that they raise themselves up, to give themselves cavolders by putting other guys out. Enough said. Someone who wants to break away from what the Kahal is doing. The Kahal is doing good things. I'm going to do my own thing. I'm going to have a break away me young. Break away me young. Break away me. Anyone who disrespects, who degrades his parents and his ancestors. Then everyone who disrespects his rabbis. Then anyone who curses the public. Then someone who stops the public from doing a mitzvah. Then it's going to be a mitzvah. Then someone who, instead of allowing his friend to do the right thing, pulls them off the pants and takes them to do the wrong thing. Then someone who uses the collateral that he took from a poor person. He took the collateral to get them alone, but he uses it. And then it's being depleted. It's being depleted. It gets wear into hair or whatever it is. Then it's going to be the same. Then it's going to be the same. Then someone who sees his son doing the wrong thing. It doesn't stop him. It doesn't stop his son. When I say, "I'm going to do the wrong thing." Then someone who sees his son doing the wrong thing. Then someone who sees his son doing the wrong thing. Then someone who holds back his stick, hates his son. Sometimes the way you have to raise your child. You see the kids doing something that's not the right thing to do. You have to say. As a parent, that's our job. So that goes in with talking about it because there's a way to do that also. But this is someone who watches his child going down the wrong path unless it goes. Then someone who watches his child doing the wrong thing. Then someone who is supposed to give to his son doing the wrong thing. But he's holding it for himself. He's keeping the money in his car and not giving it to him. Then someone who disagrees in public with the rabbis and decides whatever it is. Then this guy in public, absolutely not. He wants to go the other way. He wants to go the other way. Anyone who suspects someone who's really doing the right thing. And you suspect, look what he's doing. He wants everyone to watch really. He wants to shoot. He wants to look like, no he's not really. There's no way he can be really doing that to write. Oh shit. Someone who hates to be rebuked. Because as bad as rebuked feels, at the end of the day, when it's done right, it's going to help you. So if you don't want to ever be rebuked, then you end up on the wrong path. This one is a... Someone who says, ahh! What is that? What is that? What is that? What is that? Anyone who makes fun of this what? No tissue wrap for this guy. It says that you disagree with your rabbis. Yes. Yes. So in private. So you, of course, you have to discuss it right. You have a disagreement with your rabbis. You have to explain this to me. Right? I think there's a mistake here, Rabbi. Rabbi, you said this. Public is the problem. Public. You're allowed to discuss things with your rabbis, of course. All of Torah is that way. The whole conversation is opening. Every rabbis are going to each other. All day long. There's no problem. No problem. No issue. You want to just be a wise guy. You want to share with the rabbis. You want to get rid of the rabbis. You want to make noise, get people together against them. That's what you're talking about over here. You disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. You could disagree with your rabbis. Second chapter. He breaks it up as first explanations, like over-encompassing of what Teshuvai is. Why you need to make Teshuvai? Shara Shini goes into the ways that I can start to incorporate Teshuvai into my life. This is what we're going to start right now. Shara Shini, I don't remember my head. Look, but we'll get there. This one is what he says. Shishad al-Aqim, shal-yideh-ad-dam-yit-or-a-dam-a-shub-a-chub-a. Things that will cause you to want to make Teshuvai. He says, "La horata-dara-chim-shit-or-a-dam-ba-him-la-shub-a-la-sham." I'm going to tell you some of the ways that will cause a person to want to get up and make Teshuvai. The reason is, Shishad al-Aqim, shishad, there are six reasons why a person would potentially want to say, "Hey, you know, I'm on the wrong path. Maybe I better rethink myself over here." Each one of them will have a way that we will investigate and be able to incorporate into his character. To listen to himself. It's always going to be the first step is, "Uh-oh, am I doing the right thing?" Now, what am I going to do to grab that fort and make it reality? It's just, "Vin-a-ir-la-him-a-os-en." We want to let their ear pay attention and scale their thoughts. So they listen. They understand. Iqarim, Iqarim. These very special foundations. Iqarim, Iqarim. Furthermore, please be careful. (speaking in foreign language) You should try every day, try to make some kind of tesuvat. (speaking in foreign language) 'Cause you will see, right? This reason, (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) Because every day, (speaking in foreign language) every day that they start (speaking in foreign language) Let me see the (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) Okay, just because otherwise we become, we fall to a road, fall to a pattern. And if you're not thinking about me, 'cause you're not, it just keeps going. You're just gonna keep on going, doing the same thing you did before. (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) You have to remember God, right? (speaking in foreign language) You have to take yourself away from (speaking in foreign language) Right? The fact that you are really material, we were created from the dirt. Try to remove yourself, think about your spiritual aspect. That's so much about your physical aspect. (speaking in foreign language) You wanna take now and try to straighten out, right? Your innate character traits. (speaking in foreign language) You wanna include fear, (speaking in foreign language) And loving (speaking in foreign language) embarrassment, (speaking in foreign language) That'll allow you to step, climb another rung on the ladder. By adding, (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) Okay, so, (speaking in foreign language) So he says, (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) Okay, you wanna take out, (speaking in foreign language) You wanna separate out, to separate out these evil thoughts that are going in your mind. (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) It's just introduction, right? You're going to have now, you're going to raise up the weapons of your nephish, (speaking in foreign language) When it remembers its creator, (speaking in foreign language) You'll make it beautiful, (speaking in foreign language) Be able to, right? To walk out and walk out with beauty, (speaking in foreign language) It's the cool (speaking in foreign language) Right? (speaking in foreign language) Through you, it's the cool, (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) Please put a lot of your efforts into these six, these six reasons that are going to explain to you, (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) The guy's not up to this level, he has to try to control his level, his heart that's covered, (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) Because of the small obligations that are holding us back from making Tishuvah, (speaking in foreign language) To get you to want to make Tishuvah, (speaking in foreign language) (speaking in foreign language) Because Tishuvah is extremely important for your Nishamah, which we're going to continue tomorrow, (speaking in foreign language) Amen baby, that was the introduction to chapter 2.