We're going viral, get ready, ready, ready, ready, ready, ready. We're going viral, we're going viral, whoa, hello everyone and welcome back to another installment of the viral podcast. I'm your host Chelsea Lynn, I'm your host Paige Jen, whoa, we've got Meg here today. And we got, oh, your mic's turned on, oh my, whoa, you got Greg. Greg, don't scream, all right, I was excited. The thing is he knows, oh, here we go, here we go, nah, hey, did you like how I leaned in? Oh, yeah, lean with it. He either screams directly into his mic or talk back here, so Greg's here today. Greg is actually Mike Wilmer. I'm actually a fader, Mike Wilmer. So we were saying right before we started that you stink, I don't stink a little bit. Hey, timer, timer, sorry, go ahead, the arm, show the arms, get the arms up there. Come on, y'all. But outside work and just came in here. You messed up. Smells like that moe ick, moe icki, you're outside laying pipe. Yeah, I'm always doing yard work, it's some sort. Yard work, but you got to speak, I'm always doing yard work of some sort. Don't scream though. I didn't scream. That was an enunciate and clear, right? I'm getting pissed. Would y'all like me to leave? No. Do you already grit? Greg, no, you're doing great. He's like, I got shit to do. You are doing great, and I'm glad Greg was literally, we're about to start the pod and Greg was literally outside doing work and I literally opened the door and go, hey, you want to be on the pod? He goes, yeah, I'll come in in the five. So he literally comes in and this is it. Yeah. This is what you get. Sweat, dirt. And tears. Okay. Yeah. No blood today. Ooh. You're always bleeding. Who I love me. No, you're always bleeding this clotty lottie, but she bleeds through her vaginal hole. You bleed through his arms. Every orifice that that's on my body, well, not not quite. I got a bunch of like, I get bumps and scrapes and cuts. Yeah. You should have lived in Flagstaff. Don't say, don't, don't say staffsores again. Stop Maggie. I gotta tell you, I'll tell you what, if we're elderly and I have to deal with his fucking bedsores, you're going to have to, I'm going to have to, you're going to have to. You're actually going to put me in down, huh? I won't put you down. Chelsea, do you have a, a, a home health nurse to come and do the wounds, care. Yeah. Put bandages on you. You'll be like a mother. What if it's the other way around and I'm going to take care of you? Your bed'sores. You'd be great at it. Yeah. Greg's a good caretaker. Does he, it's your hoo-ha with the fort for you? I've actually offered. He's done stuff like that. If I, if I need something nasty done, he'll do it, he'll do it. Does he bleed in the bed with his s, uh, sores or less? Yes. I do. Yes, unfortunately. That's why we have an endless supply of a hydrogen peroxide to, uh, help it actually pulls the blood out of cloth. Yeah, a lot of messages have been written to me saying that I'm actually saying you do that a lot. Yeah. You know, I learned that from when I was in, uh, high school, they would clean our jerseys that way. Oh. Yeah. Lot of blood. Lots of blood. Okay. Especially football. Right. Yeah. If you look at our bed sheets, mine are clean and you look at Greg and you're like, oh, holy shit. What happened over there? All right. My stepdad bleeds a lot because he's on blood thinner. Ooh. He gets a little mole itch. Yeah. It looks like he went to know him. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, Pookie. That's a perfect spot right there. Keep right there and talk at that. Yeah. Yeah. All right. That's perfect. Good job. Okay. And hey, you're doing good. Maybe we could get a rod from the mic to his chin and then just hold. Stop. Hey, Rod. Rock placement. Right where he needs to be. Rod Stewart. You have like a, uh, yeah, interaction set up, you know, that keeps my neck stabilized in it. Money. Money. My mate. Okay. No more. Yeah. I'm going to say cut it off. It's like when people hang up a tennis ball in their garage so they don't hit the wall. Yeah. Exactly. That's when we for Greg. Hey, but hey, we appreciate you guys listening. Welcome back to another, uh, installment, what we call it, broadcast, welcome back to the broadcast. Okay. 94.3 XRQ, 94.3 XRQ, it's not XRQ, it's TVP, 93.4 TVP radio. Welcome back to another installment. Today, the weather is looking quite suspicious. Would you rather be a weatherman or a radio person in the morning radio? But it kind of would be fun to go head out in the van. A weather man. You'd rather be a weather man. Yeah. I mean, Maggie loves looking at the weather. Always looking at the radar. Yeah. I mean, whether they're right or they're wrong, they're still getting paid. Whether they're right. And they do. You know? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, but dang. Are they really faking wind and stuff sometimes acting all like they're blowing away or what's up with all that? Weather stuff. I mean, you got to put on a show. Yeah. Everybody. Mm hmm. I'm here one time I was working at Sonic. I was probably 16. What I never saw was our local news anchor and out of Ardmore. So there's like the big town and then we got all the little towns around it got the news, you know? And it was KXI. What was her name? Oh, my gosh. Lou Ann. Leanne Anderson. And, listen. Anderson. Listen. Anderson. Listen. Anderson. Dude. She was a radio. I'd be like, hey, welcome. Thanks for listening. And. Well, listen. I just looked her up not too long ago. Well, did you guys have said that? Good one. Sorry. Uh oh. Is she listening? She's listening. Dude, is her name really listening? Because now we're going to be bothering her. But here's the thing. She came in and apparently her mom taught at Marietta was the principal. Yeah. So she was in Marietta and she ordered like a diet, Dr. Pepper, and I took her order out and she was rude as hell and gave me a quarter. Whoa. Yeah, but that's when you're paying, when we're getting paid hourly. But still tipping a quarter. That was at that time, probably $5.15, $5.15. Oh, OK. I got you. And tipping a quarter wasn't common, right? No. Even back then, that was like, come on. Come on. Give me a-- What you doing? At least 50 cents. Yeah. Yeah. Dang. Um, that was the listening? Yeah, that was listening. Ooh. Yeah. That's all right. I remember seeing the San Diego local people, and I would watch them every morning. And then they came into the restaurant. I was waitressing it. Shelly's-- yeah, Shelly's a Marote. Oh, OK. Remember that? Yeah. Not Ron Burgundy. Did you get Starstruck? Oh, no, no. I just opened the door and I think-- I think maybe she thought I was a guy. Did she say thank you, sir? No. Wow. So maybe something like that. Yeah. But if-- Yeah. Were you in Cognito? No, just I wouldn't always get ready for work. Sometimes I can look like, you know, Ben, Benjamin Norris or who's that guy from Star Wars. Trust me. Right here. John Candy. John Candy. No, Kylo Ren. People say it looked like. OK. And you think you look like John Candy? John Candy? Here lately, I'm been looking like John Candy. I can see that. John Candy, yeah. I get the Farley more. Yeah. Yeah. Both of them. Fat men. John Farley. Yeah, you're John. Yeah. You're the fat guy. I look like you. Really? I don't know who it is. Oh, is it the golfer? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Remember we thought he was staying next door to us in the Bahamas? We're like, what? What? What? It looked just like him. Yeah. Interesting. But it was. Hey, well, let's get into the calls before we do our other stuff. We got some stuff planned. Yeah. Smell that. Yeah. We smell that grace. Yeah. Greg, you smell that? Where is that? Well, it's-- You're almost. What is that? I'm going to have to go soon. I got to get back to work. What? We're trying-- Oh. I got to be. I got to be. I got to be. Why did you just say that? Because he thought we were talking about him smelling. Yeah. Not the beans. How many episodes have you been on? I was literally about to say where we saw this. Oh, hold that beautiful bean footage, y'all. Sorry. Hey, honey, looking for advice here. So the other night, my boyfriend was going down on me probably for an hour. I know that's crazy. But I just couldn't come, so I was like, "Okay, let's move on," and he got super pissed. He was-- He was like, "I'm over this. This is bullshit," and then went to bed, and I felt really freaking weird about it. Just wanted to know what you thought about that. Love you, honey. Love you, honey. I didn't hear the first half of your message because all I could hear was this. I didn't hear was Gregle. Oh, I was wondering. I was wondering what was going on. Basically, oral for an hour was eating her out for an hour, and-- She couldn't come. And she couldn't come, and he got upset, so he just said, "Fine," then, and went to bed all the time. Yeah, I got married. Oh, honey. Because he couldn't get the pussy. I see both sides. Yeah. Because if you're down there for an hour-- But sometimes you might just not get there. True. You feel like it's time wasted. Mm-hmm. Also, at the same time, this is why a lot of chicks fake it. Because they don't want to hurt the guy's ego. Yeah. They don't want to hurt the guy's feelings. She should have just patted him on the head and said, "Good job. I hope you enjoyed your tuna sandwich and good night." Yeah. I wonder what he would have done then. Yeah. I mean-- I was dinner. You got to be a good post-sport. You can't be-- Yeah, right. You can't be a pouty post. Just suck it up. Yeah. You got to be a happy post. Mm-hmm. That's what I was saying. He got hurt because he was down there for an hour and he felt as time was wasted, he couldn't make her come. Right. I mean, and if you're the girl, you can't be like, "Come on. You can't make me come. You suck." But like, it sounds like she didn't. It sounds like she was like, "Hey, it's not going to happen." Yeah. Or she just left that part out. Yeah. Right. And sometimes she might not be eating it correctly and she might not be telling him like, "Hey, put your tongue to the left, put your tongue to the right." But if she-- She's tongue to the left and I like my thread all night. But if she didn't let us know that she tooted while he was having brunch. She would have added that if that happened. Oh. Don't be making stuff up. Okay. Having brunch. Mm. Yeah. He was having dessert. Yeah. He was having tuna sandwiches. Afternoon, he was having an evening. Oh, fuck you. Fuck you. For not making her comment for-- The summer hour. Hey, fuck you. Motherfucker. Fuck you. For taking too long and not letting him have the joy and keeping his ego in check. Hey. Fuck you. How about that? Hey, Gary. Fuck you. No, no, no, no. Fuck you. Fuck you. Then I heard his heart. No, it doesn't. All right. No, this mama does hurt you. Look at him. Greg. Just took it away. Yeah. All right. Nothing mama does hurts his heart. Don't break my heart. Um. Dang, though. Don't be a pouty puss. Is this going to be in the segment you rolling your eyes on me like that? Yeah. I hope Ben zoomed in on it. Okay. Cause did you see, you see Gary's heart? It got hurt. Okay, babe. Maybe we should, maybe you should skip this episode. Uh oh. You're a skip Bayless. You know what? My skipping. Yeah. My skipping. I'm putting my shades on cause you got to block out them haters. Uh oh. Greg, if you're going down on me for an hour, yeah, which I don't think has ever happened. But let's just say you have that. No, I can't. I can't stay down there that long. What's the longest? Do you have like a low air capacity? Who's calling? Phone's ringing. Who's calling? It's mine. I wasn't prepared for this. Who is it? Well, let's see. John. You think it's John? John. If it is. It's mitty. We're being younger man, Jensen. Who's that? Oh, no. First and last. Please don't say first and last names on here. Okay. People like to. It's Adam Lambert. Adam Lambert from the American Idol. I can say, what do you want? No. No, don't answer. Just call the player. I'm sorry. Yeah. It's probably important. Yeah. Never first and last names because people like to harass people. Okay. Could be. It could be anybody though. Yes. Me don't know. It's a common name. Yeah. I got a burp. It could be anybody listening. Can I burp? Yeah. Give me a burp in the mic. But then blow it that way. No. That way. No. What? Sorry. I had a lot of gas built up. Living water. This one. With death. Oh, the sparkling. The sparkling. Okay. Damn. Okay. So we have a little game. Hold on. We're still talking about. Oh shit. What are we even doing? Oh, you were asking me. Yeah. I was. Can everybody calm down? Freaking your friend called and I'm getting all discounted. There's like 17 dogs in here. There's a lot going on. If you're going down on me for an hour and I finally said, Hey babe. It's just not going to happen. What would you do? How would you react? What would you? Would you get pissed? No, I'd be like, babe. You want to get a pick me up and you know, you want a snack? You want Dr. McDonald's? So you go get me something to eat. Yeah. That's amazing. And then you go back for round two? That's amazing. Yeah. Yeah. No. Greg's not a round two guy. Okay. So it wasn't like an eat and rally. No. No, no, no, no. He would just say, Hey look, let's go get a snack. A distraction. Yeah. Something to end it to make me happy because he knew that if I'm not going to, not, I'm not going to be happy. Yeah. Right. So you'd end it with something happy. Yeah. You wouldn't get mad or anything. No, I'd try to be nice to you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And you know, he's probably like, you know, I just ate for an hour. How about we go get you something to eat? Exactly. Make it fair. Exactly. Hey, I got to eat. We'll see you eat too. Well, you eat too. Right. Play it's empty. Good one. And, but come on, dude, just don't be all sappy because you're never going to want somebody to eat you again. Right. If they're going to be like, it's like you don't want to play somebody who know at the poor sport. Why would you want your pussy ate by a poor sport? Do better. That's all I'm saying. You just got to do better. Mm hmm. Yeah. So. And at least you tried like she should be happy you tried and maybe say, Hey, next time. Right. Yeah. I would just say, Hey, do better, man. But sometimes it's just not there. In terms of the, not in terms of the organism, but in terms of the reaction, do better. Mm hmm. Yeah. You're not talking about the oral sex part. Yeah. Do better at your reactions. Yes. Yes. All right. So we're going to tell them about this game we're going to do. Oh. Okay. Let's go. Yeah. Yeah. I'm more clicky. You can do it. Go ahead. Oh, sorry. I'm still thinking about him eating or pussy for an hour. I'm like, come on, throwing some fingers. It like. Come on. Do better. Yeah. This is called password. And basically we each say one word. We play this on slits only. We each have one word that Beth wrote out. And we can only say one word to each other and each purse. We go around and each person tries to guess the word that's written on the paper. I'll have one word on my paper and all we can say is one word and we got to guess it. So they're ready. Gotcha. Sounds good. Chelsea, you go first and then go to Greg and then yeah, we're going to circle. Chelsea. I'm nervous. Don't be. You're a big nerd on this butthole and we don't have a time or anything. AK your tone. We're going to try to answer. Okay. We're going to try to answer as quickly as possible, but yeah. Is there anybody ready? Yeah. One word answers only. All right. One at a time, right? Yeah. Okay. One at a time. So I go first. So I go first. Greg, ready? Head. Tail. Nope. Arms. Toes. Nope. Legs. Body. Yes. Boom. Body. Boom. Bitch. Get a little. Oh, oh, oh. Let me click. Body. All right. Now it's Greg's turn and I love this game, by the way. Dude. Shout out to Russ. Here we go. Greg, go Maggie. Stingy. Fun. No. Page. Subscribe. Follow? No. Post. Social media. No. Okay. Maggie. YouTube. Netflix. No. Page. Send. Share? Got it. Boom. What? Boom. Bitch. Wow. Yeah. Were those pretty good hints? Good job. How love share? No matter how hard I try. I'm so nervous. You said I can't break through. There's no talkie do you? Oh, that's so good. Who's first? Who's first? Me. Oh. No. No. No, me. Go to me. She guessed it. No, but Maggie's going now and it's my turn. Okay. Pussy. Vagina. No. The vagina? No. Clark. Uh, Lois? No. The big D. No, you can only use one word. Oh, uh, I'll surely set it so. Okay. Okay. Okay. Penis. No. Now. Um, page. Sticks. Uh-huh. Is it good? Molt? No. Um, schlong. Wiener. Penis. Dick. Come on. Come on. Dick. I'll give it. That's what I'm going to use. I already said penis. Yeah, but it's not big. It doesn't have to be the exact word. Who's Dick? Uh-oh. Oh, but you guessed like multiple times. That doesn't count. Yeah. I think it's. She's trying to hurry the game up. Yeah, come on. Come on now. Okay. Pfft. Chelsea. Broadcasting. News. Greg. News. I'm using your word as well because it's a really good one. Gotta say a word. Gotta be quick. Update. Um. TV. Episode. Oh, gosh. I'm sad. Hm. Ooh. Internet. Network. Social. Entertainment. Oh, my gosh. Hm. Broad. Waffa. Media. Yeah. It's media. Woo hoo! Let's just do one round. What? I think it's a visual. This is a visual gang. You have to like because we've done this on slits only and people love it on slits only. But I'm just thinking of the audio listeners. I'm sure it's very like slow for them. This is a visual thing. You gotta be watching. Yeah. What I mean? Yeah. Let us know. Write us on Instagram and let us know if you could keep up or not. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. One round was good. 'Cause I wonder if I could keep up or not. That's kind of a hard game. It really is. But if you don't understand it, if you do understand it, it kind of makes more sense. Yeah. Do you understand these nuts? Do you understand these nuts? Oh, dude, you can't see Cher get stuck in my head all the way. And you keep pushing me and shying and I can't break through. There's no talkie do you? All right. I've got a little, would you rather hear from Charlotte, one of our subscribers. She said, this is a, this was a good one. Would you rather be the age you are now and you'll never grow old, get sick and can never die and will live forever or have a time machine and can go to the past or future with the option of being seen or invisible in your travels? Down. That was a lot to unpack. Yeah. And I'm, you got me lost to live, live, live healthily forever. At the current age. At the current age or be able to, to basically time travel past and future where you can go unseen or seen. So time travel or live forever? I would time travel probably. I don't think I would want to live forever because all y'all would die and then I would be sad. And then we just got to work forever. Yeah. I agree. I don't know if I want to, if I would want to live forever as well. What's up with the scene and I'm seeing okay, so you can go basically you have an invisible cloak or you can go and be seen so you can go and lurk or you can go and be seen. Time travel for sure. That would be cool to be like what y'all doing in the 20s, what are y'all doing? Time travel. Yeah. But I would want to come back here. Yeah. It, not necessarily even time travel to the olden days, but time travel to maybe a moment in your life. Yeah. Where you just loved even just laying there looking up at the sky. Yeah. Or a happy memory you have with someone. You're like, let's do that again or a smell. Hey, did the lava lamps just blink? I didn't say. That was trippy. Are you tripping, honey? Hey Ben. Let us know. Let us know. I swear I looked over and they like blinked. Are you, are you high? My. My baby. Did you guys see that? Uh-oh. But there's too many cameras they can't. We can't even see them. Yeah, they can't see, honey's. Hey, honey's can't see here. Hey, honey's you there. Hey. Honey's. What was, what's the nastiest thing you do for $10,000? Hm. Hm. Probably like, I wouldn't eat poop. Mm-mm. That would take probably a meal in. No, because that can make you sick. I would eat something nasty, but nothing that would affect my health. Would you, would you, would you eat an octopus cock? Oh, yeah. Yeah. What about a goat or a cow's dick? Yeah, just put some sweet and sour sauce on that muffler. And there's all the fur on it. Oh, God. I don't know about that. So I can't fry it up. Yeah, I was going to say cook. You can fur it up. Raw wiener. Raw wiener. Oh, that's raw dog in it right there. Yeah. Oh, that's disgusting. That's real. It's raw cow in it. I may have to do that for more than $10,000. Hell, yeah. Eating human flesh, you can get sick from that bit cannibalism. Well, that's also illegal. Yeah. You don't want to do that. Where are you going to get the human flesh from? Maybe that chick Barbara who's cut off her husband's dick. Barbara. Barbara. I don't know who that is. Is that someone from your hometown? No. Cut off their husband. Maybe Lorena. Why not Bob it? Yeah. And then they went and found it and sewed it back on. I remember when that happened. I was so young that I don't necessarily remember, but I remember like the adults around me talking about it. So he cheated on her? Yeah. Did the why? Was that the wife that? No, the wife didn't do it. Was it? It was. Yeah, his wife. His wife cut it off. Yeah. Was it John Wayne Bob it or Greg, will you look it up Jamie? Jamie. That was an interesting one. Did the wiener work I wonder as well? Can I just say something to you guys? Look, I am the guy who got his dick cut off and I was not cheating. I was just trying something out and my wife thought I was cheating, but anyway, I got my dick cut off. Listen. Gary, you are not the guy that got your dick cut off. Come on Gary. His name was John Wayne Bob. John Wayne Bob. Yeah. John Wayne Bob. It's crazy. I remember those names, but it's also even crazier. He remembers. I know. How do you know? How do you know? That is the dude who got his dick. She flees their home tossing the severed organ from her car window as he drives away. And they wouldn't find it. She drives away. And they found it. And I've saw like video of that and they were like yelling wait, it's over here and they had eyes and we're real careful with it. When they pulled up on it, did a dog sniff it out? I don't know. That motherfucker did a porn after that. Dude, the dog probably had to sniff it out with a muzzle on, so it didn't bite it. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, yeah, you're right. You know what case really, really had my attention when I was a kid? The Joey Butter Fucco case. Oh, God. Fucco fucking talking about. You know what I'm talking about? I remember that. Is that the saint? No, Joe. He's the one. And like Staten Island and that little girl shot the mom. Yes. She's like 16. And they made a lifetime movie about it and I was obsessed with this movie. Really? 17 year old Amy. Amy. Fisher. Yep. Amy. Oh, they got so famous after that. Oh. So funny. Which is sad. Like. Yeah. A lot of killers get famous. They need to have a whole thing called keeping up with the killers. The mom lived or the wife lived and then her face up pretty bad. They said they were married till 2003, so they stayed married. Getting shot messed up her face for this. Yeah. And I think she had to stay married because she couldn't work or anything. I don't know. I know she did interviews and stuff. She couldn't see. Who was she shot by? Her husband's 17 year old mistress. You don't remember this case? Joey Butterfucco. I've heard the name. He sounds like an Italian DJ or maybe a chef. Joey Butterfucco. Joey Butterfucco. And she didn't even do long in prison. They did. Man, they did. They had this lifetime movie and I would every time that was on my ass was watching and I was obsessed. That was my first taste of true crime I think. Of course. Mine, I was really into like Jody Arias though. That was big. I see Grace was all over that front and my sister loved it. There was a lot of cases though. There was Casey Anthony we had. We had a lot of... When you were young? I felt pretty young. Got it from my college when those happened. Yeah. I mean, I'm trying to think of younger ones. Joey Butterfucco. Just that guy in my town who was killing people and feeding him to lions. Yeah. Yeah. It's funny about that. That was always going around. Yeah. Yeah. Interesting. It was always going around. Yeah. It was the one that was feeding the people to the lions. Was that in Utah or was that in California? Duchane area. Yeah. Where I grew up. Wow. In the town. And that his nephew, I was telling them he was the one who looked at me in the bar and went shredder and I was like, "Oh, fuck." Do you think he listened to the pod? I mean, I hope not or else I'm going to be shredded. Shredder. Yeah, I guess I didn't know this story. Yeah. Look them up. No, I'm talking about the whole incident with you at the bar. Oh, yeah. Well, if you would listen to the pod that you're on. Yeah. I used to listen to it. Yeah. But you're busy. I used to listen to it when he got busy. Then my radio broke in my car. Yeah. It's okay, Pookie. Yeah. You don't have to listen to it. Okay. He says, "Okay. Let's do another call." Okay, honey, it's a crazy story here. So, my professor in college would always tell her students the same story about something that happened to her. So she used to work in an office before she became a teacher and professor. So at the office, they had this guy and he would always make coffee for everybody. Well, one day after however long she had been drinking this coffee, she noticed there's something in the coffee. Turns out he had been dropping a load and everybody's coffee. So, at this time period in which state ever it was, she was in when this happened, there was no law against it. So the guy got off free and now, in this state, is illegal to ejaculate into someone's drink. So, crazy. Love you, honey. Love you. Can you imagine being like, "No, we don't need to make that into a law. Nobody's going to do that." Yeah. And then somebody does it and you're like, "God, we've got to make this into a law now." Well, can you imagine thinking you're drinking coffee, Creamer, and it's calm? I'm going to puke. I'm in fuck the law. You've just been drinking cum for seven years straight, thinking you're co-worker, a nice guy. Does she think that she was getting boba in her coffee? Greg. That's... I probably thought she was getting that mud water or like, "What's that stuff that fills you up?" Really? Like, Kiefer? No. She probably thought the creamer was curdled. Yeah. You know? Paige always talks about Kiefer. I know. Keeps. What? That is disgusting. I remember, God, I think I've said this a long time ago, we grew up near Gainesville, Texas. And do you remember when we were a little Maggie? Our aunt was telling us that somebody got in trouble and arrested because he was shitting in the beans at Carcocosa? What? Yes. What? Yes. He was shitting in the meat mixture. What? Was it turning into beans looking like beans? Oh, no. I guess was... I don't know. I don't know details. But I remember hearing this. We're not going to do that. What's up with the fetish? I just can't get behind the fetishes that people like to see you drinking their calm or eating their shit. That's a fetish I can't. That's not even a... That's a damn crime. Yeah. That's like horrible times a million. It must be like a hot gacha and you don't even know it type of thing or like a control thing or like a, I don't know. You think the person sat at the coffee shop and was just watching people drink his shit and just going up like, did your coffee taste like shit today? I did. I don't know. Like that was a fetish. Because some people I feel like watching the... Bro. Because a lot of killers go back to the crime scene, you know? Yeah. And like to see it all play out freaking weird. We'll remember a couple of years ago how big it was that somebody at work said that they suspected that the coffee was like pee, it smelled like pee, so they put up hidden cameras and there was a co-worker pissing in the coffee pot. What? You must hate your co-workers. Or have that fetish. Yeah. That happens a lot. My mind is blown. Or you're just so lazy you don't want to go. It is an ordinary feeling the water. Stop. What? I'm just kidding. Get out of here. It's just, yeah, I don't know dude. And odds are someone listening has done that, has pissed in something. Yeah. And let somebody drink it. And a bretta. Yeah. Just to see if it turns clear. Gosh. Insanity. I would never do that. No! And the fact that they did it where there are cameras. I know. Look up. Hey, before you jizz. Look up. In the cream cheese at Taco Bell, whatever, look up and see if there's cameras first. Mm-hmm. Inspect your area. Think twice. Yeah. And also make a decent decision. How about that before you shit in a bean burrito? I know that people were jizzing on seltzers, hard seltzers at the gas station and stuff. What? Yeah. Jizzing on them? On the boxes and stuff. So imagine you're just picking up a box. You're like, "Oh, this must have got rained on." That's why only fans had to change all their stuff because like all of a sudden you can't post like outdoors or in public. Even if it's not, even if it's, if like I would be posting a vlog. Just a vlog. And if it was outdoors or in public could not post it because they stopped allowing public videos because people, there's a kink, people go around and they either jack off or have sex in public and they were doing it. And they had only fans. It's always been a thing though because my sister's back in the day told me a guy chased them on his bike and was jerking off. Oh my God. Don't get that cut in the chain, buddy. Oh my. Yeah, don't fall. Oh my Lord, y'all. Was this something happen to do Shane as well? No. Oh, okay. Do Shane, man. No, that one wasn't do Shane. I know. But do Shane is a is a pretty cool town. Just even the name. Do Shane. Well, they were like back in 1800s, like what should we name this town and some guy like duh, duh, do Shane, do you know how to spell it? Do you? It's spelled weird, huh? Do you, C-H-A-N-E? No. Do you any of you know? Oh, Maggie don't know for sure. Yeah. Do you, C-H-E-S-N-E? Oh. And it's? Yeah. And even the news anchors in Salt Lake would say and do Chesney is going to get a high of-- Do Chesney. Hold on. If you're a news anchor in Utah, know the towns. Know the county. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Do Chesney. Y'all are the only little town out there. Yeah. So, well, there's a few, but very few. But every school who wasn't 1A would call us do Chesney, because the news anchors, you know, got that going. Do Chesney. Do Chesney. You know what I used to do? Oh, no. K-X-I-I. They used to have this thing where they had a birthday segment. So if you, if you called in or emailed in and just said, "Hey, could you give a shout out to so-and-so?" Or a birthday or? Yeah. They put it on there. They, they just put the name and the birthday of the little note. And I would do it constantly. Yeah. I mean, great. Good for sure. Y'all did that too. Hell yeah, dude. Dude. We were probably so annoying. Oh, they, oh, I got, they got emails from me weekly. And it would not even be anybody. I would just put like me, I'd put myself, and I'd wait to see my name on the, that's funny. Being so excited. They would just roll it like credits. Yeah, I kind of. Oh, okay. And remember you could call and request your song all the time? Yes. I would be doing that a lot and just couldn't wait for them to play something. And high school, when I worked at Sonic, they had this thing called Sonic Radio and you could call in and request a song. I remember. And I would call. Wait, at Sonic? Uh-huh. Who would have to answer? The Sonic Radio. A DJ. For Sonic. For Sonic Radio. Where was the DJ? I don't know. Yeah. Where was the headquarters at for that? But I would call in and be like, can you, I'd like to request, you know, this song. They'd be like, okay, we'll see if we can get an on and be like, and can you put me on, on air? Can you put me on air? And then they'll be like, we'll see. We'll see. We'll wait for it. And it was always like an hour behind. I'd wait for it. I'd wait for it. I'd wait for it. And we'd all just be sitting there and all of a sudden you hear, hey, can I hear it? It'd be my voice. We'd go, oh my God, we're at Sonic Radio. Yeah. Yeah. That's cool. Freaking. Mm-hmm. The excitement of things. Yeah. Is wild. Yeah. And then how you get used to things, and then things become desensitized, and then you just go, oh, yeah, and then you start chopping up people and feeding them to lines. Can we do my favorite segment of the pod? Oh, you have a favorite already? Yeah. It's just my favorite. No. I think I'm out of here. You got to button there? We don't have it, Brad had it. Oh, that's right. No. Hey, show the line. Shredded. Shredded. Oh, niggies, sticks, sticks, sticks. Why? Something we love. Everybody ready? And play along at home. Just think about something that you love, and it could be something small and it could be something big. Oh, yeah. Post it to your Facebook. Mm-hmm. Post it to the Rock Fucker's group. Mm-hmm. Okay. Something I love. The California Desert. Okay. Which part? All of it. Just looking at it. It's just beautiful and I just love Joshua Tree and all of it. Okay. That's a good one. I love being out there. Mm-hmm. It's peaceful. It's beautiful. I just love it. I just watched the date line out there. Really? Twenty-nine poms. Yep, there's always date lines out there. I know. Twenty-nine poms. That's where some military bases come out. Yes. They'd be killing people out there. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Some friends whose husbands were there. Okay. What I love is when you open up a bathroom stall and it's clean. That's a good one. Oh, that's a good one. Because it's rare. Yeah. That's about to say few and far between. Hoorayer. 'Cause you're hoping. As you're opening your own. Yeah. I know. I kind of like in my head have a routine of what stall I go to. Oh, it was awful at the Creed concert. I could... Oh, my. No. I went to go to the bathroom. It was awful. Really, mine was a good experience. It was one of the worst I've ever seen. God, the men's line was way longer than the... I mean... Women's. There was no feces, but it was urine and puke all over the toilet seat. Oh, my gosh. And I'm like, "What is going on here?" They were going frickin' buck wild here. Yeah. If you want to know the demographic at a concert, just walk past the bathroom and see which line is like most, you know? Yeah. Pat. 'Cause Creed definitely had more of a men demographic. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Molelets, long hair. It was awesome. Right. Dude, Creed was so good live. It was a good show, wasn't it? Oh, my gosh. He even frickin' fingering 11 people are running the hell's going on. Yeah. What's in him? Fingers 11. Fingers 11. Finger 11 and then Tonic. Black guy gave me Chills finger 11. Yeah. It was good. I enjoyed it. He kind of looked like Tom's cigarette. He was like really fuckable-looking, huh? Okay, yeah. I can see that. I hope he listens to the pod. Yeah, he's like, "Hey, I'm in my car right now listening to the viral." If you're the lead singer of finger 11, Paige wanted to fuck you. Yeah. So there's that. Anything y'all love? I love feeding the babies. It makes me happy. Not your kids, the dogs. The dogs, because they rely on us. And it makes 'em happy. And they love eating. And they enjoy it. That's a good one. And they get fed well. They get in wagyu and all that. Oh. Oh. Yeah. We feed these babies good. What's something that you love? There's lots of things I love. List one. Okay. Hmm. Okay. I had time to think about it, but all right. Yeah. Yeah, I'm sorry. You love getting pedicures. I do. Yeah. That's a good thing. Has he already listed that? No, I don't think I have. Oh, thanks, guy. Greg loves getting pedicures. Yeah. But can I go too? I like to get my back shaved too. Yeah. Do you think it feels good? Or you like the after effect? Just after, right after, you know, it feels good. After he has some time to start growing back and he feels the pricklies, he gets a little itchy, you know? He'll probably experience that in different areas. Oh, for sure. Okay. So. All right. Beth has one. I have one. I love an empty plane. Oh, yeah. Did anybody talk? Yeah. We talked about that a few episodes ago. Yeah. And empty airplane? Yes. I don't even remember talking about that. And not crammed airplane. Yes, Beth. All right, something that I hate when you're standing there waiting for the car door to be unlocked. Oh, my God. Just tugging on it. I hate it. I know. I hate it. I hate it. I know. Bad. Yeah. And you also hate when somebody's trying to, or when you're in the car and then they haven't turned it on yet. Yeah. Oh, I got. I got, I got, uh, I got lectured about that, uh, just the other day. Yeah. Chelsea will be in there screaming, especially in the summertime. Well, here's my thing. And Greg knows this. And that's why I lectured you. I said, we've been together 19 years and I have requested this one thing since day one and you still don't do it. And then you get in the car, turn it on immediately and get the air flowing because I can't breathe. Greg will get in there, shut the door, put on a seat, just the mirror, I'll just, I'm all while the car is not on, there's no air flow and I'll go, I don't want five seconds to go by with that. Start the car and then do all that stuff so we can get brick so I can breathe. Yeah. Yes. And roll down a window maybe even or just like, what's going through your mind when you don't start the car? It gets hot in there. Oh, I don't know. He's just preparing for my drive and what I'm going to do wrong on the drive to get chewed out. So, you know, well, this is what Greg does. Welcome to the roast, Greg, but this is what you do. You are talking to Chelsea the whole time. Well, Chelsea, you used to do this though a little because I saved us from that car crash when that counts because when you were talking, you were turning your head and that's what Greg does when he's talking to Chelsea. That's what I learned it from. He can't not like look when he's talking to people and it's really bad. He'll stare at you and then venture off the road. Yeah. And we almost went straight into the back of the diesel. We were like inches off and Chelsea's like, Greg, and when Greg's freaked out, he just starts laughing all crazy, like, and it pisses Chelsea off more. Well, yeah, it was just like a freaking, I don't know, but so you need like maybe a head restraint, like a NASCAR thing, so you can't turn your head. That keep his head right here to where he can't look at you when you talk because he'll just do this and go, yeah, when I sit behind Brett and he does it, I put my hands on both sides of his head. So when he turns his face, the look and runs into my hand, it's so funny. That's what they use for horses right when they're racing. I think so. So it doesn't. Yeah. Little blinders. Yeah. Or be quick at that. If somebody's talking, look over for a second. Greg will literally just drive and be like, oh, look at that build for like 10 seconds and I'm like looking at the road and he's literally venturing off and we're going around a corner. Like no one to look over at when the story, you know, if you're on a straight path, are we right? Yeah. I'm not disagreeing with that one bit. Yeah. We should start a safety class for road. We should go to schools like dare, you know, hello, when you're driving in a car, a road safety class, a safety course, we just make a video, Greg, I will say, other than that, other than those two things, you do great. Yeah. You say I take off a little fast, but I like to accelerate. He takes turns. He doesn't slow down for turns. He'll fucking. Yeah. I think I think you should, you know, keep that momentum going. If it's just me and Greg in the car. She loves it. Oh, we do have a story and we're going to take that to our grave. Oh my God. Y'all fucked. Yeah. Yeah. Some roadie. We, we really could have fucked some shit up. Let's just say that. Bobbi fuck. Growny Bobbi. Hey, hey. That cheer made it back safely, didn't it? She almost got in a wreck. No, not at all. Chariot Tubman about took over and tubbed off the dang malt leaky with a little rolly and a little poorly. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Enough said. I got it. Oh, God. Hey, we never, we never were on two wheels. This is what I said. I would never fucking let my car be on one of those apps, like come rent me car. Oh, remember when we were in the Touro? Yeah, or Touro. I would never allow my car because I see the way Greg drives and I've seen a lot and I've seen a lot. Interesting. All right. Well, should we do another call? Sure. Last call. What's that? It's quite sad. I don't want it to end. Right. Hit me. Hey, honey. Paige from Iowa here. I was just thinking, one of the which you guys think about crab ring dune. I'm from the Midwest and I've had crab ring dunes with all kinds. Um, I've had them here as a pizza, as regular crab ring dune, as a dip. Or as like a deconstructive, like cheese ball, just curious what your thoughts were. If you've ever had any of those, if you're curious about any of those. Koya crab ring. If it's a good one, I'll love a crab ring gun. Yeah. They can be made disgustingly. Remember those ones that we had recently? Last. Last crab ring dunes I had. I swear to God. So if you don't want a crab ring gun is, it's like a fried egg, uh, egg roll. Shell. And they put usually cream cheese and, um, usually invitation crab rolled up fried. Doesn't doctor evil leave it? I don't know. He's like, I spent my summer. Maybe not. I don't know. I never watched that. Anyway, the last one we had, it had invitation crab and then it had the cream cheese and I swear to God, it had sugar in there because the cream cheese was sweet. It was sweet. Not like it. Not like a little bit of sweet. Like, it was supposed to be a dessert and it was disgusting. What's your favorite? Like on the pizza? No, I never had it on a pizza. I like it when it has cream cheese, when it has green onions or scallions in there. And I usually like it when it's made with a good crab and not a nasty imitation crab. I will eat imitation crab, but only if they put a little bit in there, but it's made with a good crab when, and with cream cheese and the scallions. Oh, so good. Yeah. Imitation crab, is that even, what is that? So they take like just fish. Any type of fish. Fish parts and leftover fish stuff and all that. I think yeah. And then they just basically just manufacture it to look like crab. It doesn't even, it looks like. So it tastes like fish. It's made of fish, but it's not, it's not crab. It's kind of like a hot dog of the sea. Yes. Yeah. Yep. Exactly. Exactly. Nice comparison page. And I don't care for imitation crab. Like I said, if it's little, it's fine, but people love imitation crab and I just can't get behind it. You know those couple noodles? What's the swirly thing in it? Noodles. It's like white and pink and pink yeah, has a swirl on it. We had them at ramen. It's not edible. It tastes like styroly. I don't know. I know what you're talking about now. I don't know. I have no clue because I've only seen them at once. Yeah. Where was this hat? We went to this ramen place and it came with like almost like a disc. A little pink and white swirl thing, they said it on the noodles. It comes in cup of noodles all throughout growing up. I would say, can I eat this and then I'd stick it in my mouth. Does it dissolve? Yeah. It was like styrofoam. Oh okay. What if it's just for decoration? I thought that too. I don't know what it's for. I wonder if people eat it. Don't put decorations on food. Yeah. Well, we ate ours and it just was rubbery, like it tasted like a noodle. Google that. What is that? Well, I don't know what to even call it. Put a cup of noodles in swirl. Pink and white swirl on ramen. Pink and white swirl on ramen. Let's look and see what this is, because it's very odd. Ooh, and I've been on a ramen cake, baby. I've been on a ramen cake. I've been on an Asian food cake. Look how cute that looks. What is that? What is the... That's in it. They are really cute. What is that? What is it? Fish cake. Fish cake. Fish cake. Wow. It's this. Let's say fish cake. What's it say? Hold on. Okay. I'm just saying pictures. Everything's saying fish cake, but... Okay, fish cake. No. Matsuba. I never heard of it. No. It's a fish paste. Oh, okay. One second. And does it dissolve in your thing? Interesting. Wow. No, I've... You know, in all the Asian food that I've had, I've never experienced that. You probably just eat it because you're the bircoshawn. You don't even... No, I put some food down for sure. Are we going to lunch? Well, we're going to go mukbang after this. Who is? We all three. Oh, yeah, we're. We're all with us. I got to get this done. You got to finish your... Okay, Pookie. Yeah. I'm sorry. That's okay. We appreciate you taking time out to be on the podcast. I've had a good time. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to... Are y'all not finishing up? Or y'all? Well, war. I mean, we don't know. I'm sorry. Naruto Maki. Huh. Naruto Maki. Naruto Maki. A type of fish paste. It's called Naruto Maki. So when you take... When you take a bite of it, it wasn't fishy though? This person said at least that's what I believe. So we're not sure what to believe. Everyone has a different name for it. Exactly. It was styrofoam. No flavor, really. Yeah. That's why I thought... Is this a little decoration? I just wonder if the one that you got wasn't actually fresh, maybe is a little dried out, possibly. Mm. Yeah. I don't know. Yeah, because the corn and the carrots and the peas and the ramen, it's so good, but you're kind of like, "What is this?" Oh, God, I love ramen. Do you ever get the avocado egg rolls at... Come on. It's cheesecake factory. Don't you like sleep on her back? Okay. Yeah, no, maybe. So anyway, the little noodle looking things. A little closer to your mind, yeah. The little noodle looking things that come... Oh, I love those. But what is that called? Noodle looking things. Like rice or beans, bean sprouts. No, not bean sprouts. Rice. That's what they put in. Fuh. It's still a rice noodle. Rice noodle. So they just cook to the point where they're just kind of crispy here. I think so. Okay. Why? I'm just trying to figure out what those are. Oh, it's the Easter basket stuff, isn't it? It's the Easter basket stuff. Okay. Hey, you guys, we're going on tour. We're going on a live viral podcast tour, so if you can't get enough, we're going viral. Of us, we're literally going viral. Most of the shows are sold out. That's awesome. Okay. Thank you guys so much. Yes, please go and see if there's any tickets left in your area at the viralpodcast.co. Dot-co and please, please, please have travel safe and don't forget your boat leakies and your boat stickies. And don't forget to give us a call. Malt licks. Malt sticks. Malt licks. Oh, I'm sad. I don't want to leave. Malt licks. You never know. You may have some people show up. Malt ricks. Malt. Rick may show up. I don't want to leave. Kaya, give us a call at 442-777-3331. No, please remember, you're doing alright. You're looking good and fuck what everybody else thinks. Get ready. Ready. We're going viral. Get ready. Ready. We're going viral. Get ready. Ready. We're going viral. Get ready. Ready. We're going viral. We're going viral. We're going viral.
