TADPOG: Tyler and Dave Play Old Games
Ep. 782 - Pit Fighter (SNES)
You're about to listen to Tadpog, Tyler and Dave play old games. It's a comedy video game podcast. We would like to stress that the host are not experts and are really just very crass commentators. Seriously, this is an explicit podcast that happens to talk about video games sometimes. So please enjoy this pretty okay podcast with Tyler and Dave. Hello Internet and welcome to a very quick turnaround recording for the boys. Y'all boys ready to play some pit fighter? Hell yeah, we need guns. We need guns to fire on. All right Trump. We do need guns for this. So before glift in a pallet man prize money, prize money palette is Trump a big gun. Is he a big gun guy? I don't know. Well, whatever gets in power Republican is what I should have said. I mean, I was like against him or anything. I mean, he's whatever they tell him to be whatever they tell him to be. I know he was against the bump stocks, which was a not very Republican thing to do. Game stop. He's absolutely opposed to game stop. It's like one of his top like campaign bullet points. Look, I don't agree with a lot of what he has to say, but I agree with him on the whole game stop. It's really not necessary. Do we as Americans really need two game stops within a block of one another? No, I don't think so. The deal with game stop is I never go into a game stop, but I'll be sad if they're not there. Yeah. It's nice to have. I go in there and look for pops from time to time. Okay, good. They're sending us the shooting copies of games that a scratch. But I don't they're not sending you a good one. You're retro things. I don't buy anything there unless it's like a bongo pop that I want. Yeah. And even that I don't obviously I don't need anything. Yeah. Supposedly they're they are coming out with a retro store like a chain of game stop retro that I've heard that. It's about that for a few years. Is that actually going to happen? I saw the like the logo on their Ford on TikTok. So maybe and you know no one goes there and tells lies. So speaking of retro game stores, have you seen the one in the new one here game? It's called game galaxy. Is it really? No, it's just like you know. I just kind of want to go in there and be like, bro, you know good and well. This is the name of a fucking place in Nashville. Yeah. No. Multiple locations. Somebody. Did they sell like retro games and stuff. Are they related at all? No, I don't know. I kind of doubt it. Yeah. Yeah. But I thought you were the suit in a briefcase and be like, just are you guys affiliated? No, I can't. It was LLC out of national. No, I can be bought. But if my price isn't met, I am going to have to report this. Oh, yeah. That's interesting. That's legal blackmail. Yeah. Yeah. You're out of to that. I just thought maybe you had heard of it because they sell games retro games there and stuff. No, I hadn't. Where are they? It's over by the airy claim. There's a little shopping. A little. Like Cardinal Point? No. On the other side, like next to dollar, gentle. By that golf store? Yeah. It's a little up from that. Okay. It's a little shopping center. The fucking... Like KFVS used to have an office in there. Yeah. I know. It's in the back part of that. Okay. Gaze is telling me a few weeks ago, he's like, "Dude, have you been to Game Galaxy?" I'm like, "What?" I'm like, "No, I've never been." There he goes. He goes, "They just opened here." I'm like, "What?" I thought it was... The arcade. The arcade. Awesome. And he told me what it was and so I haven't been over there yet but I thought I'd go and see. I had no idea. Yeah, I'll have to go. I don't know what their hours are like. I don't know. And I would probably wager that they're not going to be there long just because small businesses never last in Paducah. Oh. Infinite collectibles. I feel like... They've done okay. They're in a good spot though. They're like... Nicky was telling me that they moved and I was like, "I don't think they moved." They moved down to the shopping center over their next two... You pop up in a station now. So they did? They moved forward. They moved closer to the street. Okay. That's good. They need to move closer to the street. Don't be under the office, but some of the underpass by the strip club. Yeah. I mean, I think it's a great location. Very convenient for me personally. I told her near where I live, so I may go by there at some places. I always go and check and see that Bayou Billie after I get titties in my face. That's just how you do it. That's Tuesday. Yeah. It's Tuesday for a reason. Across from Belous, there's a storage place called Toy Storage. Yeah, I know. I've seen it. I think there's a picture of Woody and everything. Like, I've thought, like that one part would be like, "If I just tweeted this in tag Disney, Bob, I live in place." That little place used to be in front of the dirt road over on 32nd Street that women's clothing store. Oh, yeah. Yeah. They used to be there. There was a Chinese place. Y'all have lived here a while. You remember China Boy? No. All right. There was a restaurant on Broadway called China Boy. Man. And I lived, I was best friends with like the kids. The China Boy. With China Boy. I was trying to man. Well, they were from Vietnam, so go figure. But anyway, they knew their audience. Yeah. Vietnam Boy wouldn't work me as well, at least not in the 80s and 90s. But I was best friends with the kids whose parents own China Boy, so we spent a lot of time down there. They're the ones that we used to do the bottle rocket wars with and stuff. So I lived on press chicken and fried rice throughout the high school. Yeah. Because I mean, we'd go over there with them and we'd be with like Quinn or why or one of them and we'd go in and Quinn would like go into the kitchen and just bark at orders at them. And then he'd come out with this bowl like, you know, the size of a punch bowl full of press chicken and fried rice and we'd just get plates and go sit in the living room at their house, which was the next door and eat and eat just crazy. Where was it? And I wish I go for China. So on Broadway. Oh, wow. It was right next right near Paducatilman High School, like a block over from Paducatilman High School. Wow. Okay. And so anyway, it's like by Los at the time or? Yeah, it was real close to that area, but it was just a house that they had converted into a restaurant. It was there for years. So when the kids moved out after high school, they all went to college or whatever. And so they sold the restaurant and reopened on over there by Dairy Queen in a place called Dragon House. Okay. I know Dragon House. And it's where like pizza in and stuff for the area. Yes. Okay. Yeah. So Dragon House, they used the actual the literal Mortal Kombat logo on the sign and they were give they were served with a cease and desist order by Midway. Oh, I didn't know that. To take it down. It wasn't what they were that was there for years. And it wasn't long after the cease and desist that they ended up closing up shot because I think they were just ready to move out of here anyway. But yeah, they were better. Yeah. China boy and Dragon House was like better than Chang's. And it was a shame that I wish I could go back and have Mays walk again. Mays walk. I don't know. It was the last time I went was maybe my sophomore year of college like shake wanted to go. He and his girlfriend at the time. And she was she was Chinese and I guess he was like, let's go with the mall and go eat Chinese. Okay. Yeah, I remember that. But that was my mom's jam. We went because I didn't like it very much when I was little. That's where she always wanted to go every time we went to the mall. We used to have some really good Chinese places here and it's kind of falling by the wayside as far as I'm concerned. I just like the old school buffet style. Yep. Chinese, but whatever. So you guys went up to this this last day. Well, let's see, let me bring up my notes for wisdom sages of media media consumption corner, a watch to movie called trap by M night Shyamalan. It's M night Shyamalan's newest movie. It stars Josh Hartnett and Selika pop singer Selika and Alison pill. Yeah, I think probably Alison pill, as you might know, is the drummer for sex belong in Picard, Kim, and it's a really good movie about a guy who is taking his daughter to a concert and it's very like Taylor Swift kind of, you know, like the hype around this singer. She's not like a real performer in real life, which she is, but not by this name. This is Selika that I'm talking about, but she goes by like lady something. In the movie, anyway, the dad has taken his daughter to this, like highly sought after concert and while the concert is going on, the FBI and the local police start to surround the place and it turns out that they're surrounding the place because it is rumored that a serial killer, a known serial killer, an active serial killer is at this concert. They received a tip that the serial killer was at the concert and that they were going to do everything in their power to stop this guy and catch him and it's no secret. This is revealed very early in the movie that Josh Hartnett is the serial killer that they're trying to catch and so the whole movie is him basically trying to get out of the stadium where they're having the concert. While killing somebody or? No, I'm not going to say anymore. I'm just going to say that that's it. So it's a pretty good movie. I really liked it. I thought I'm kind of an M night Shyamalan fanboy. I don't like, I'd never saw Last Airbender because I just heard too many bad things about it. Yeah, yeah. I've heard that it was really bad and that he had made it for his kids and it was just garbage. They hated it. And they probably hated it too. Dad, the sud, God. They divorced him actually. Well, but I've liked just about every one of his movies. I've seen all of his movies except the couple of ones that he did before he kind of became before he did like the sixth sense and stuff. And there's a couple of movies that he made when he was first starting out, but I haven't seen fifth and fourth sense, but yeah, it was fourth and fifth sense smell and sight. Yeah, they weren't very interested. It was just, you know, the smell was really bad. It was boring. Yeah. They really just couldn't translate. Yeah, they just had to describe the smell. Yeah, exactly. It didn't work. One and two were very different. It was fashion and humor. But I do like his movies a lot and I'm real, I'm happy with this one because it's just a fun movie, it moves really quickly and it's got a good plot and Josh Hartnett really brings it. Yeah. And he's really, really, really good in it. He's pretty picky with what he takes nowadays. Yeah, he is. I've seen him do like, I think the last thing he was doing was like Penny Dreadful. Yeah, like since part four of days he fell off and just very rarely. But he really, it's really good. He's really good in this and the whole thing takes place during a concert in the concert. The music was written by Celica who is, that is an alter ego, a stage name for M Night Shyamalan's actual daughter, Ashanna. So she is in it as this performer. She wrote and performed all of the music in this movie. And it's not your nepotism. Yeah, exactly. It's not my style of, it's not my style of, it's not my style of music. It's just like very pop, very top 40 kind of stuff, and I'm just not always into it. Sure, yeah. But there's no denying. It's actually pretty decent music. And there are some moments in it where it's kind of like, okay, get on, they're playing music and not getting on with the- Oh my God, it's Smash-Mell. Oh, yeah, the ladies and gentlemen. Credit's wrong. So there are some ladies and gentlemen moments in it, which kind of like, okay, I get it. This is her first big deal thing, and he is her dad and made it all. But it didn't ruin it for you. But it didn't ruin it by any means. I really, really, really enjoyed this movie. And that's kind of the overt showcasing of Celica's music is going to ding it by half a point for me. Does it cue our code like- No, it's not the movie. Not that I saw, there might have been some that I just didn't notice. Hey, do you like this song? Scan now. Three and a half stars was the same, so check it out. I really enjoyed it. If you're- Especially if you're an M night Shyamalan fan, I do recommend- Shyamalan ding dong. Shyamalan ding dong. Shyamalan ding dong. I watched another movie called The Watchers, it's on HBO right now. Directed by Ashanna Knight Shyamalan. She actually directs this movie. They're okay. They're not related in any way. I was just- I wish I thought it was In Night Shyamalan. That's what I actually wish. Yeah, well, it is- So she doesn't go by her stage name. She obviously goes by her given name Ashanna, and she directed this movie, and I want to say she wrote it, and it stars Dakota Fanning, and several other people whose names elude me at the moment. But they're not like- It's not a super recognizable cast, not like, except for Dakota Fanning. You might not know who else is in it, but- There's a good chance I wouldn't- Yeah, even if you're me- Josh R- and I had to be like- Even if you watch a lot of movies- The guy who used to paper cutter to cut off John Stewart's fingers is okay. If you're- Watch a lot of movies, they're- I think they're just- They're great actors, they did a great job in this movie, I just don't know their names, maybe I just haven't seen something they're in. I don't know. But anyway- What's it about? It's about this place in the woods where if- once you go in, you- it's in Ireland, and it's this forgotten sort of place in the woods where when people go in, they get- they have to run in- they have to get to safety. There's a shelter like in the middle of this area. If they get to it, it's fine, but there's not- they can't get enough time to get out. Like you can't get out without getting caught by the watchers and- and killed or dragged into their world or whatever. And it's this really- it's a strange conceptual movie that I just never- it felt almost honestly like some of his- some of M. Knight's early work had very creepy tones, very- very entertaining story. It moves right along, it's quick, it's not boring. It's creepy, it's got some really creepy visuals in it, and I really enjoyed it. I thought Dakota Fanning fucking nailed it in this one. She has really come a long way. I mean, she's always been such a good actress, but when she was a kid, she was just being like that little kid- that little kid actor that you know is good at it, but is also just acting like a little kid because that's what they are. She has really grown up and has really just did a great job in this movie. It was kind of a sleeper for me. I did not see it coming. Tonya had said she wanted to see it and we sat down and watched it and by the time it was over, I was just like, this was fucking good, so I definitely recommend it. This is a hard recommend at Four Stars for me, it was insane to just check it out. What was that one called again? The Watchers? The Watchers. It's currently streaming on Macs and HBO, if you have access to those, it's probably also on your streaming platform of choice. That's good. But I do give it a high recommend because I had a lot of fun with it, but again, that style of movie is sort of right up my alley. Finally, as much bitching and complaining as I have done about George R.R. Martin, since I've been on this show, I started listening to Game of Thrones again on audiobook 4. Man, I'm almost done with it and I'm the first book. Because these books are like 30 hours long, they're longer than the longest dark tower book. I feel like you have like, your mutinability is that you can stop time. You get like 10 more hours a day than like an audiobook just to like listen to audiobooks and watch stuff. It's because I rarely don't have my AirPods in. Yeah. I had to go by the mall before I came here to grab something and I went ahead and got some dinner at Chick-fil-A. That whole time I'm there, I've just had my AirPods in and I've always got some media going because it makes the voices harder to hear. So I started listening to Game of Thrones on a goof because I don't want to keep paying for Audible. Yeah, sure. It's really expensive. It is very fucking tight as you well know and I've got this whole bunch of books that I already listened to once but very long ago, I'm just going to listen to them again. Man, I forgot how fucking good Game of Thrones is. The book is so, that motherfucker could write. Yep. It is fucking unbelievably good and I having listened to the book and seen Game of Thrones on TV and now I'm listening to the book again. I had to watch the show first, just to be able to separate the characters in my head. Yeah. Then I enjoyed the books a lot more. Let me see that because there are a lot of characters. Yeah. It's hard to keep up. It's hard to keep up. Man, the way that those books are written and the way that the story is chopped up makes it so much more interesting. I feel like if it wasn't written in that way. Yeah. The way it jumps around is to its benefit. Absolutely. It helps. Yeah. It's a good spot. Picks up on the net. Oh, yeah. I forgot. We've got to talk a little bit about brands. Yeah. There aren't enough multi-view books out there, in my opinion. I would love it. Donut Head Chapters. Oh, yeah. I agree. Yeah. I agree. Or Kajiar. You know, open it up and see what's going on in other books. Even the Dresden Files. The Dresden Files, they're two books. Very linear. There's Harry's point of view except for the gap books, which then every other like Murphy has chapters. Yeah. And Thomas actually says. And that would be good. Those are really good. Dresden Files is hard to get into because of that. It stays so on track with that one character all the time that it's easy to like, if you don't put it down, you can find yourself losing interest in not hearing something and I would have to go back and re-listen this stuff. I feel like King would do that too. He doesn't always do it, but I'm thinking of it particularly. Like, that's one of the things that I liked about it, especially in the beginning of it, where it's kind of like jumping around a bit. And it's not like written from the perspective of the characters. It's not like first person, but it's like telling you little bits and pieces here and there. Yeah. It's engaging. I like that. It's driving me crazy because I know what happens, right? And this book mostly, the first book, it just breaks my fucking heart. Everything that happens in this book is just to the Starks particularly. Oh, yeah. It's just awful and it is so much worse. And Ghost Star doesn't get... No. They are fucked. There's so much worse in the books, like the detail to which he's able to go because it's a fucking book, it just tears me up, but I can't stop listening to it, you know? It's just that engaging and as much time as I've kind of criticized him for not finishing and don't get me wrong, I'm still pissed that I know it's going to come to a point where there's no more and the story is not done. I'm still mad about that, but these books are fucking good and I had forgotten. I had sort of taken for granted how good these fucking books are and I'm glad I restarted it because Holy Lord, it's just been a great time. See, I like in a book with multiple narrators when they're supposed to be some sort of reveal, like a dungeon crawler Carl, when Carl has a plan and you clearly mad at him and doesn't want you to know what it is until it happens and you see the twist, he says, "Well, here's the plan and it cuts away." Right. I get it. It reminds me of the cheap. It's like duck tails or something. Like when they whisper. It's like, "Okay, here's the fake and then yeah." And it fades to come on the next scene, yeah. Just go to a perspective from somebody who wasn't there instead of that, I think that is the cool path to take where it doesn't feel like a weird narrative device. Well, and it's like you know how well the fact that he jumps around to all the different people and tells the story, but it's like visually in my mind, aside from what he's describing, I'm seeing all of these people getting closer and closer and closer together in their storylines all drawing into the center of how this is going. And I know how it's going and I know where it's going and I know what's going to happen, but it doesn't make it any less fascinating that everything he says in all these different chapters has bearing on something else that's going on in all the others. And it's fucking brilliantly written. And I can understand why that makes his process take so long. Oh god, the books are so fucking long. Dude, I'm serious that first book is like 35 hours long. The Dark Tower 7 wasn't that long. It was like 28 or something. So I feel like the longest audiobook I ever listened to is the last Wheel of Time. I think it was like 42 to 45 hours. That's crazy. That's a long book. But this one is more entertaining to listen to than the Dark Tower was. As far as that one book, the Dark Tower book 7, this one's more interesting, more entertaining just because of the way this story is told. And it's not just perfectly linear all the time. But anyway, yeah, super fan still forgot how good, how much I really liked his writing style and how awesome the book is. So I'm not going to apologize for being mad at George RR Martin, but I'm still on the fence as to whether or not I'm going back to Rothfusses books, so don't, don't, don't, at me. Also fucking amazing. They're fucking great books, but I'm, I'm a really tested him. But they're still waiting for, um, another author who's kind of in that trap is a gentleman, the gentleman bastard series. Oh, I don't know that those are all so God, those are so fucking good to add those to your list. Okay. Okay. Those are fucking great. I'll have them done by tomorrow. Yep. Well, you've been up to Dave, moving stuff around in the house. Yeah, still at it, huh? Now we're, we're done. We, we finished yesterday. Nikki got set up in there, uh, we got a desk in the office for her. She expressed, uh, interest in playing Final Fantasy. And I was like, sweet. Let's get a desk. Yeah. I love that. Got her a desk and a chair and, uh, it was. So in order to do that, we had to move a whole bunch of stuff like there was a rack or like a rolling rack that was full of like consoles and, uh, like a CRT and all that. That had to be moved and the moving, the moving, the stuff part was not that bad. It was the, what do we do with all this shit? Right. Why do I have so much stuff? It was, yeah, it was one of the, so a lot of money to that myself several times going through stuff and organizing stuff. And yeah. Got a fun way that shit. Do I really need this? Yeah. Have I used this in six months? If no, I'm going to put it away or throw it away or give it away. Man, it like I am one of like, this isn't a quality I like, but it's the truth. I hold on to boxes. Me too. I do that too. I hold on to boxes and it's like, like I might sell this. Yeah. Exactly. I'm going to be. It's worth more if I keep the box to my MacBook Pro that would be obsolete long before I sell it. It's a collector's item. Yeah. Yeah. I, that's the thing. I don't like that about myself. It's good sturdy boxes. They're cool boxes. They're not like cool boxes. It's not like we're getting cardboard box, but like your cell phone box is a cool box. It is a cool box. It is a cool box. Especially like Apple stuff. They, they really go out of their way to make the packaging like fancy. I threw those all. It feels special. I threw them away. I just got rid of a bunch of Apple boxes myself. So I'm right there with you girlfriend. I kept two boxes. One was from a power supply that I recently purchased because I was like, this is still returnable. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't normally keep power supply boxes. But that's not one of the kinds that I keep till it's not returnable. That box is staying. I get it. All right. Two. And then I kept the, well, I'm sorry I lied. I kept three boxes. I kept that one. And then I kept the, the box of the NES Classic came in and the box. That's, that's. They're small box boxes. They're decorative box. I threw the PS5 box away. That hurt a little bit. Ooh. I know. But box is so fucking big. The box is like, it's, it was one of those. It's like, that's not going to be like a cool collection. That's going to be just as, I mean, but the NES Classic. Yes. Yes. Yeah. I would have kept that. Hard, hard agree. Hard agree. I threw away my, I, so I had kept three boxes of Super Mario Odyssey cereal. I should have brought them to the show, we're going to eat in this expired cereal. Throw one up there on my shelf. It's too late, man. I, I, I, I wish I had a thought of that. Um, yeah. I threw them out. Cause I was like, I'm going to eBay and look and see how much you're selling for. Yeah. This guy's selling for $15 like, uh, I really got to make some room here. What's more important? Uh, spend some time with my wife or three boxes of Super Mario Odyssey cereal. And I'm, when I moved into the house, I'm in now. Yeah. I had to go through a bunch of stuff and I have a bunch of Star Wars collectibles as you know. A lot of them are still in this box around here somewhere. Uh, one of the things that I had that I decided to get rid of. Was it like a Millennium Falcon, was it like a box for like a Kenner toy or something? No. It was a, it was a two liter bottle of Pepsi from, from when Phantom Menace came out. Oh, yeah. 2001. It was, uh, I am shocked that that fucking bottle of pepper never busted open. Got eaten by the Pepsi inside it. Yeah. I didn't, but I turned to a Pepsi elemental after all of a minute. I had a moment like, why in the fuck did I keep? This is so bad. The fact that I kept it and never opened it, because I thought at some point someone would want to pay me a bunch of money for a two liter of Pepsi. Let's look it up. Let's look it up right now on eBay. Let's see. Let's thoroughly break the entire, it's like $400. $600. No, no, no. I'm hoping we're going to laugh and be like, it's, you know, $15 right call. Yeah. If it's less than $20 now, I wouldn't, I wouldn't deal with it. If it were less than $20 or less, but it's not bad. There's no way it's going to be uneven. I'm looking it up. Phantom Menace Pepsi is what I'm typing on. Yeah. Man, you could have the old one on eBay. I think it was Phantom Menace when it was one of the prequels. Pretty sure it was Phantom Menace. They have a Star Wars episode one Phantom Menace Pepsi store display shelf talker, Jar Jar. That's $7.99. Okay, so for a good of the Pepsi that goes on. Yeah. I feel it. That's just the box. You're going to have the Pepsi to go in it. You had the, you could have bought it and sold it together for $600. Here's an empty Phantom Menace Pepsi Anakin Skywalker soda can for $12.99. It's empty. No Pepsi in it. No man. It's not worth $12.99. Why did Mountain Dew never do like a do or do not? There is no try. Why not? God, that is a great idea. What the fuck, Mountain Dew? Mr. Dew? Mr. Dew. Come on. Get with the fucking program. I didn't find any on there. I don't know. I didn't do an in-depth search, but I'm not upset that I got rid of it. You'd have to lie like a motherfucker at the post office. Anything liquid or bearishable? No. Anything Phantom Menace related in here? You don't shake that, but no, there's not anything Phantom Menace or Pepsi related in this box. You know, I thought Qui-Gon was a really interesting character. Yeah, quit shaking the box, man. Seriously. Weird that he just, they just gave him a Viking funeral. I don't know. They did that in Star Wars. There's a lot we didn't know about Star Wars before Phantom Menace came out now. Do you think you just made up Metachlorians or was that like- No, man. That shit was there all along. It was there all along. I knew it was some kind of the powerhouse of the Force cell. Yeah. Was everybody else like, "Oh, there's Qui-Gon and his old Metachlorian crazy Metachlorian theory." Like maybe he was just the only one. They just play along. Qui-Gon and I. When he brings up the Metachlorian count, they just play along. When it's in on the- Yeah. Just just let him get it out of his system. The edit is, anytime someone mentions it in the movie, like someone canonically rolls their eyes. [laughter] It makes like a movie goes again, please. A second time this week, god damn it, I got to get transferred to a new post. I cannot work with this guy. He's crazy. It's just Metachlorian, this is Metachlorian that. That's it. I mean, that's it. Made some space. It looks nice in there. She's got, she's all set up. I love the idea that your wife's gaming rig is in there with you. Yeah. I think that's cool. If Tonya were a gamer, that's how I'd want it. I'd want her to have a, we'd have a rig set up in a room. That's a cool idea. Now we did it in Lexington. It was really nice. I remember that room. Yeah. It was really nice. It was a really nice set up. So it's similar. Cool. Yeah. Yeah. She mentioned it. I just jumped on that. It's like, "Yeah, fuck yeah. Take advantage of this." Power level, you baby. Yeah. Don't change your mind. I'm already working out plans. How about you, Tyler? What's up, man? It just worked. It just worked. Yeah. I've been doing my fair share of that, too. Boy, I wish I didn't have to do it. Me, too. Yep. Just if someone would just send me a reasonable amount of money for doing nothing, for doing nothing more than just enjoying life, you know? Oh, all right. Here's your enjoying life money. Go pay some bills, go buy yourself something nice, we'll see you in two weeks. That'd be great. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. They could call it something like, I don't know, a universal basic income or something. They could. They could have that. Nah, that's a stupid idea. No one, no one, no one, no one, no country on earth would ever do that right now. How it makes everything better when you provide everyone, they're based in necessities. It's pathetic. I just don't, you know, pipe dreaming. It's pipe dreaming. Like, I don't know how it works. I'll be perfectly honest with you. I don't know how it works, but I can also tell you that if, like, I was provided that, then it would be like, yeah, sweet, I'm not working. Yes. Fuck yeah. I could see like, how does a country like get done? I would get done. I don't really honestly don't know. I would literally just take a job at fucking McDonald's or something because I don't have to care. Yeah, I get it. I mean, that's you. Look, I'm the guy from American Beauty, not Kevin Spacey, the character he plays. Yeah, I'm going to just go because I want to go work at fucking McDonald's or something because we know that Kevin Spacey can't do that. Because I don't have to care. We do. We do know. Think about it. Think about it. I don't have to care at that point. I got enough money to pay my bills and I got a little extra from my McDonald's job. It would be fine. Now if it were enough to where I could just be comfortable and still have a little play money and a little things to do here and there, then I wouldn't work. Yeah, I think I would just figure out, like, how can I make this work? You just live within your, wait, you live within your means? What the fuck is that? Yeah. Come on. Yeah. No, I don't agree with that. Come on, Brad. Yeah. How can I make this work? This is sweet. You know, it's awesome. I'm having sex going back to bed. Let's keep this rolling. How long have you been a member of the Communist Party? I don't know. How long have you been a minister now? Although courtesy of Phil Hawkins who provided me with another idea, I do have some blind drafts. Some blind drafts? Multiple. Multiple. The first one being the no homo, jerk ability to no homier draft, his fine, blind draft. No. That's all I mentioned that on this go. There are, there are, there are comedians on it. Okay. All right. It's exclusively comedians. All right. So how is this different from part one? You'll see. Okay. It's a surprise. All right. All right. You guys good? Ready? Hell yeah. I'm good and ready. I'm good and plenty. For the no homo, jerk ability. Part two, Steve Buscemi. Steve Buscemi. So like I, people like really dog on him for like being ugly. I don't think he's a really ugly man. I can kind of, I guess see like he's not like a Hollywood like conventional handsome Hollywood guy. But to me he looks like a normal human being like, and I like him. I like the stuff he's in. I like his acting and that goes a long way, especially for a man, to appreciate the talents of a man. Yeah. Not to be sexist. I mean, I appreciate the talents of a woman, but I also like looking at women. Hey, you know, you could be a pretty woman and not have a lick of acting ability and I'll be just fine, you know, if we're talking about jerk ability, you don't have to. Yeah. What do you do? So I mean, he's, I'm sorry to jump ahead. I'm just excited that he's, that he's on the list. He's high for me. This is like a, it's like a fucking, it's like a fucking two man for jerk ability. Everything. Yeah. Respect the man. Yeah. I can, I can have a good respect. You know, what here finds power sexy, you know, yeah, respect. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Number two. Plus, if you're leading with Steve Buscemi, I can only imagine what the rest of this list is. It was like, Brachetta, Steve Buscemi. Buscemi. Uh, I'm also very fond of Steve Buscemi. I love his work. I think he's a fine looking dude. I think he's talented and all that. But I am going to hedge my bets a little and I'm going to put him at seven. Seven. Seven. Okay. No offense to Steve. But the next one, you could step out into the main area of, of the Holland deck and find a life size cardboard cut out of one Danny DeVito, man. I guess it would be my number one spot. And that's the thing is, Danny DeVito would respect you for jerking it to him. Well, I would hope so. I wouldn't put those words in his mouth myself, but you know, I want to meet Louis de Palma J.O.I. from Danny DeVito. I'm going to put him at eight. John Malkovich. See, now we're getting more into my territory. I like John Malkovich, think he's a good looking dude. Just watched the transformers movie, the second transformers movie, the Shilah Buff one, the second Shilah Buff transformers movie, and John Malkovich is in it. Now, like his style, I'm going to put him at four. Dave, the Malkovich? I guess like a seven. Yeah. He's all right. He's all right. Yeah, he's all right. Next, I know it's a favorite of years, Dave, Clint Howard. Clint's got a lot of looks. Clint's been in a lot of stuff. I think I'll put Clint Howard at six. Six? Yeah, I guess that's a nine for me. Gilbert Gottfried. Oh, he's dead. Yep. Right? Yes. So that's a ten. That's a dead man. I think Gilbert's going to be my five. Danny Trejo. That's up there. Danny's a good looking dude. Machateh. Machateh. Danny without the smooth face filter looks like Ben Stiller. It's really... It is. It does look a little like Ben Stiller. I haven't seen that. I haven't seen that. I got to check that out. Isn't there a movie where Ben Stiller plays like a Mexican dude, like, oh, it's like Ron Burgundy or something. He's like... Oh, he's one of the... I don't think he's from the L-type of no... He's casters. Yeah. The rival newscaster war. I think Danny belongs number three for me. Yeah, that's... Fuck it. That's... We'll go one. He's a good looking dude. He looks real good and... I thought Davido was your one. I thought Davido was your one. No, that was a joke. He's a pillar. Okay. Man, you keep it score over there. Well, I remember that Davido. You said one. I was like, okay. Shit. Shit, I'm proud of you over there. Man, that's some big brain over there. Next, Edward James Almost. Almost what? Or Eddie Jimmy. Eddie Jimmy almost to his friends. Yeah, that's a... I mean, that's a five. Almost the best part of Balsar Galactica. That's the almost. That's the almost. Oh, there you go. One for the Eddie Jimmy. I think Eddie Jimmy's going at nine, but only because all my middle slots are taken. I'd put him higher on the list if I could, but I like him a lot. I want him in a Final Fantasy game. Just like... Just in it. Just him. Not voice of the character. It's just him. He's in the game. That's what I want. I think that'd be hilarious. He's in the opera house. Yes. Eddie. I think he'd be great too. Eddie. Almost, it's in the game. Nice. Louise Guzman. Okay. The celebrity graduate of the community college and community. Yep. We'll go six for me. I think I'm going to put him as my ten. Really I'm going to regret that, but ten for him. I'm saving my top spots. Probably not a good idea, but here we are. Next, I mentioned him during Batman Returns, Vincent Chevelli. He was the one and ghost who taught the organ writer. Oh, yeah. Yeah. He taught Patrick Swayze. He had to touch things and ghost. He was a dick and ghost at first. I've never seen it. What's he teaching my touch? Things. Like breasts. I mean, yes. When you're on that wheel, you're on that wheel. Yes. It's just things. It teaches him how to not pass through objects when he. That seems like valuable or dangerous information to give a ghost. A little bit of both in the movie "Ghost" starring Patrick Swayze and Demi Moore. I really don't want to tell you the plot, but you should watch it. One of them's a ghost. Whoopie Goldberg's in it. Shit. That's what she won her Oscar for. Oh, wow. And her she got. Best sporting actress. Damn. I find that movie to be cringish as fuck right now, but I don't deny that it is actually a pretty good movie. It's just got some really cringy moments. Yeah. Yeah. Well, shit. Now that's the watch. It's a it's a it's a. Bub story. I mean, it's yeah. It is what it is. It's a pretty good movie. Well, yeah. Patrick Swayze. You like Demi Moore? I don't dislike either of these people. I mean, I like Roadhouse. This is not at all like Roadhouse, but I like Roadhouse, that's what I'm saying. It's Roadhouse with a little more pottery. I like pottery. There's a giant pot in the shape of a bear following a man at the end. I mean, how did you know? I thought you said you hadn't seen that a lot. Someone does die on shards of stuff and get dragged to hell. Hell yeah. And that's what I remember as a kid be like, be that scared the shit out of me. It was scary. It was a scary scene. Maybe that's why you got to see it as a child. Yeah. Yeah. Because I remember not being able to see ghosts. That was one of those movies where it's like, I don't think I don't think you should see it. See, I had my aunt wearing it. That dirty dancing. Couldn't watch. I know those movies. They're two of the safest movies I've ever seen. Meanwhile, Revenge of the Nerd. Is it because your parakeets find? Is it because your parents don't like Patrick Swayze? Is that what it was? Maybe. That's a Randy logic too though. Those have the same. Those both have that in common. Maybe or it was 1988. I don't know. It could have just been that. Could be. I mean, it's like, do we know what we're doing here? Not really. Does anybody? Nah. It'd be fine. But by house, just fine. Some of them streetlights, he'll be fine. They were right. You were right. Go off. Thanks to Forkies. Thanks to Forkies. But this same average before is gum, but my parents were pissed. Oh, yeah. Oh, man. My dad, especially love for a scum. That was when it came out on VHS. We were there. He was there. They watch it now, but they watch it. I was watching. Shit. That was good, man. Last one. Last one. Last one. I got two. Who did I miss? Oh, I didn't rank Vincent. Clint Howard. That's an eight. I mean, I don't know. I've still got two. Steve Busch in me. Danny DeVito. John Malkovich. Clint Howard. Gilbert Gottfried. Janney Trehill. Edward James almost. Louise Guzman. Vincent Chivelli. One more. Oh, oh, oh. I forgot to rate Vincent Chivelli. I'll put him at two. The last one who stands out in my mind, grotesquely so hard eating, putting your mashed potatoes. Abe Vagoda. Number one, baby. Yeah, that's a three. That's all I got left. Love Abe Vagoda. Number one. All right. No homo success. He went with the conventionally attractive guys for homo-driggability one, and I saw Phil talking about you doing what Tiny Tim named a bunch of like, not very attractive people. So it's like, okay, we'll do the inverse. I don't know, man. I feel like most of the guys on this list, like compared to the conventionally attractive Hollywood guys, sure, a lot more talented, but like compared to like, yeah, these are character actors, you know, the most part or comedians. What I feel like, I don't know, they just kind of look like they're dude people. Yeah, yeah, yeah, attainable. So I did do a follow up to our 90s naked night with a TV land 10 spot blind draft if you're interested. Yeah, let's do it. I didn't watch a lot of TV land, but I might, I might be familiar with these shows. I bet you, even if I'm not, it's fine. You ready? I'm ready. All right. Number one. Just barely missed my cut off for the 90s, naked night, green acres. Green acres is a place for me, ding, ding, ding, for living is a life for me land spreading out so far and wide forget man, hadn't just given that country so that that that that was on my wife. Goodbye city life. I watched a lot of green acres. Me too. If this is green acres is going to be my, my baseline number five because I feel this draft going some places where I'm going to need to leave some spots open at the top. So green acres is number five. I'm going to move, yeah, see the thing is, it's like, I don't know how many of these shows I'm going to be super familiar with. And like, while I agree with you, a five is, I feel like a five is a perfect spot for green acres. It's a good baseline. It's a, I watched the shit out of it, but not one of, I know, we all know the fucking theme song, but it's not one of, it's like, Dave, tell me what happened in an episode of. They're, it had the same thing going on from a, from a poll. Exactly. Yeah. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. I had a show and was upset about her setting. Man, how, how great would it be if we today could be like, all right, let's make a bunch of money. Here's what we're going to do. We're going to write a television episode. And then we're just going to remake it every week. We're going to just change a couple of things here and there. People are going to love it. They will love it. It's like the animal. That's what they need. They don't get that anymore. They got the anime intro. They got the anime opening. That's what makes it, they spent all their budget on that opening song. That's a five. Gets the viewer pumped and then it doesn't, it doesn't have to matter. Gets the people going. Yeah. Green acres. Five. They'll call you. Okay. Next, the sister show to one green acres, pedicote junction. All right. I didn't watch it much. I did watch pedicote junction. I couldn't tell you anything about it. I preferred pedicote junction to one acres. I didn't at first, but then the more I watched it because it had the parents who had three attractive daughters all named like Bobby Joe, Betty Joe. Okay. They were like this are where I got my taste in women by the way. They were all naked swimming in the reservoir or whatever. And the number one. The tree goes by. I got nudity in the show. I put in pedicote junction at six only because I very rarely watched it, but I do remember, I do remember liking the show for the same reasons I liked green acres, you know. Same vibe. Like they were once in the over, they would have crossovers and shit. Yeah. I'm in six. Yeah. I haven't seen it. So that's a 10 for me, but I did go to middle school with a girl named Bobby Joe. So maybe it should be an, uh, can't go wrong with a Bobby Joe. Next the Andy Griffith show, and I'm going to try that. That's going to be story. Ronnie Howard, producer of the dark tower and brother of Clint Howard. My number nine had to get both Howard. Sometimes I'm how involved in a right above the dead man, the undertaker. I really liked the Andy Griffith show. I watched it a lot. I watched it a lot at the hospital. Melissa tries to find on TV whenever our patient is being unruly and it usually always works out. Everyone's good for the Andy Griffith show. Number three, that's a tough one cause the ones that goes color, I do not like it as much. Yeah, me neither. This one could easily set it in the top slot. I'm not really great with commitment though. I'd rather just deal with bad choices after the fact. So yeah, I'm going to put him at number three, even though I will say he definitely could sit at number one without a problem. I love Matlock too, by the way. Matlock. I loved Matlock. Dave, where'd you put an Andy Griffith? Yeah, it's a nine for me and I'm just never really I mean love that whistling love that whistling. That's some good whistling. When I was a kid, I would stick around for the theme song and then I would just I'd switch it. Yeah, it wasn't I wasn't for me. I always liked when he would play guitar. He would sing sometimes and stuff. He was just a great talent. I really love the guy. Next happy day. Happy day. Love Barney. Happy day. Sunday, Monday. Happy day. Tuesday, Wednesday. Happy day. Thursday. Friday. Happy day. We're grooving all week with you these days are our boy boy happy days is going to be in number two I thought I thought not watching happy days and liking it for a long time and then remember nothing else being on and we're just like a marathon and by the end I was like fucking happy days. Happy days is my number two again. It could sit easily at the top of the list with no problem once again featuring the great Ron Howard, you know, we got Fonzie. Hey. Oh yeah, he's in the rest of development. He jumps a shark. Yeah. God. He's great. Good. He's in Parks and Rec. Yeah. The daddy of the girl. It's his money, please. Yeah. Can't remember their names now. Mona Lisa and John. Something. John. Rafael. John. Rafael. Yeah. I'm putting it in number two, but with trepidation. Man, that Weezer video was really good. Let's come listen, lost your mind the first time I showed you. That would be a four for me. That video was packaged with Windows 95. That sure was. It was in it was built into Windows 95 in the in the my videos folder and you could watch it. It blew my mind. I'm watching a fucking music video with sound and moving picture and everything on my computer. I don't think you can maximize it. Nope. It's like tricking off to real player. It is. About the size of four postage stamps and that's as big as it gets because hard drives weren't big enough for more video at the time. Had to delete that one to make room for the shit on my gateway 2000. Oh, yeah, jazz ball next all in the family. Okay, see, I was not a huge fan of all in the family. I respect the show and as an adult, I've watched some episodes and I do like it. But as a kid, it flew right over me of course. It wasn't designed for kids. Oh, yeah. It wasn't it, but I do recognize its power and I do say I do not use the word power lightly. It was a power. Oh, yeah. It broke tons of fucking boundaries. It really did. Yeah. That's great. Personally for me, it's not something that I would want to watch again. Like I can sit down and watch Green Acres right now. No problem. I'd be fine with this, but all in the family, I got to be in the right mood for all in the family. Yeah. I mean, we're watching the Sally Struthers commercials where she's trying to raise money for the starving children. And then going back and seeing her and all the family and someone telling me that's her and being floored beyond belief. She was cute as fuck and all of the family and kind of grew up, let's just say, or out, if you will, for those of course, I'm going to put all in the family at number nine just because of the infrequency with which I watched it. Dave. Man, that was tough to choose between two and three. It's not a number one show for me, but I liked all in the family a lot. I liked it a bunch. Funny and heartbreaking. Yeah. Funny and heartbreaking. And also one of those where it's like, I mean, it was one of those, honestly, it's like maybe one of the first shows I ever watched where I felt like there were layers to it. I know that's like a cliche thing to say, but it's absolutely right. But it's one of those. So, yeah, I'll put it at three. That's a three. Yeah, because the episode where Eve dies and he goes back and has her house shoes and shit. It's tough. Man. It's tough. It was real sad. Next, the Brady Bunch, that show where everybody was fucking behind the scenes. That's what I hear. Is that true? I've read a lot about it and then how horrible the dad was to work with. Yeah. Because he wouldn't put out. Probably. Come on. Fuck us. No. Your children. You're a female. You suck. I do think he died of AIDS. You're a female. So he was fucking somewhere else. Someone. Yeah. He wasn't having sex with the women. I can't have sex with you. I have AIDS. You see because he's. What's that? Ask Freddie Mercury. Uh, man. Your kids will hate it. Something tells me that my true soulmate number one is coming through this list soon. And I don't want to leave, I'm going to leave that spot open. So far I haven't found one that I don't like so it's fine. Brady Bunch would be higher on the list if I could put it there but right now it's going to go at number four. I loved the Brady Bunch. I watched it religiously and it wasn't even on that long but I've watched the reruns. I watched the spoof movies of it. God, the 90s movies were so fucking good. They were so good. Holy shit. They nailed it in both cases and the fact that they did the second movie of them going to Hawaii. Right. I mean like they did in a show and the thing with the tarantula always terrified me. Joe. Glass. George glass. George glass. George, drop a can out. Number four for me. I loved that show. Had a huge crush on Jan and Marshall. Dave. That's a six. It's a it's not a number one or two for me in the next spot I got a six. Three's company. Hell yes. Hell. Yes. One. Yeah. I don't know if another one because so far I've been kind of like I like all in the family. Three's company is the one where it's like man I watch the shit out of three's company. John Ritter under appreciated fucking genius in no way in no way was he under appreciated. He was absolutely phenomenal and when he died at the fucking world broke for a minute. I mean everyone knew what his deal was. He was such a good actor loved him as Zach Grestad and scrubs. I thought when he first showed up I was like fuck god damn it they nailed that they nailed that fucking gas. He's jadeys dad. Yeah. That's perfect. Ready as a bicycle pieces and shit. Yeah. Yeah. What is the name of the movie where he got pulled into the TV. Oh. It was on my horse. One of my. Two Dan. Yep. Two right. That movie. Yeah. Loved him in it. Yeah. I watched. Yeah. Between the zombie waning Garth and shit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Stay tuned. Stay tuned. That's it. That's it. Yeah. Love. Love John Ritter. I'm going to put three's company at seven because I didn't watch a whole lot of it. That was one that I wasn't allowed to watch. Really? Because it was so body. Yeah. And you know because of Susan Summers being kind of trampy. Yeah. It was tasteful. It wasn't tasteful. I watched that one a bunch of my 20s like Nikki and I watched that one a whole bunch. See I didn't get around back around to it really ever. The ones I have seen and remember it was a great show. It was fucking hilarious show. I just never got back into it like as an adult to when I could appreciate it. So it's heaven for me. The Jeffersons. And that might be a two for me. I love fucking love the Jeffersons as a kid. Love George Jefferson. I didn't watch. I didn't really watch the Jeffersons until I saw him on one of those VH1 reality shows. Then I went back and watched the Jeffersons. Also a great theme song. That's a two. That's a two for me man. I love. I love the Jeffersons as a kid. Number one. Number one. Absolutely. Without question. I loved that fucking show. I watched it every day. It came on like W. TBS or whenever TBS was like a broadcast channel it was channel four on our cable. I watched it every day every day. And I loved it. I loved it. Loved it. Loved it. I loved it. Um, Lenny Cravitz's mom is in it, you know, I mean it just can't go wrong. I love that fucking show. The Jeffersons is my number one and that's where it belongs. There's going to be, I, I've got a bet on a show that's going to be next or the one after that it's like, I'm going to be like, fuck me, I'll worry when it's done. I worry that I'm going to do that too, but I'm not, I am not the least bit mad that I put the Jeffersons. No, no, no, no, no. I'm not, but I'm going to be when Tyler says it, I'm going to be like, fuck. I like this better than the Brady bunch. I've got a, I've got an eight and a 10 spot. I've got a seven and an eight. Yeah. Sanford and seven. I love Sanford and son as well too. It's a British show. It's based off a British. Oh, is it real? Yeah. I did not know that. Yeah. Weird, right? It is weird. I can't remember the name of it. I'm going to put it as high as I can at number eight, but it's a barrister and son. It was the same. It was the same premise pretty much just, you know, I don't think it was a black family. I think it was, I think it was like a, like a British minority, you know what I'm talking about? But like, I don't know enough about British minorities to be thrown shit out. Right. Yeah, man. I liked it a lot and like fucking top tier, I mean, you're like pulling out the shows with the theme songs, man. I mean, yeah, every, every fucking one of these shows has a good theme song. Yeah. All of the family. I mean, I don't know the petty coach. I don't either, but if I heard it, I would know. Junction. Yeah, pass. I'm glad that's a 10. Woo, woo, woo. Paddy coat. Junction. Yeah, that's a seven. That's the highest spot I can give it. What'd you give it again? Eight. Eight. Out of necessity. So lastly, up your nose with a garden hose, welcome back cotter. The sweat hogs. I watched a lot of welcome back cotter. Welcome back. Your dreams were your ticket out. I get that song stuck in my head sometimes. That's going to go in number 10, but that's not where it belongs on the list. That's just because of fate and my indecision. It really, welcome back cotter belongs probably at my number three and then move everything down a spot and I'd probably be all right with it, but I fucking loved welcome back cotter. I loved it. That it too. John Travolta was such a big fucking deal when that show was out because it was right around. It's the breakout. Yeah. That was his breakout role. Saturday night fever while welcome back cotter was still on the air. So I remember him taking a big hiatus and it was like a weird deal when he came back for some Saturday night fever and he was, you don't get any bigger than John Travolta was than 77 to like 1980. He was the fucking biggest goddamn deal on the, on the, in media and then he kind of did some stuff. You know, he didn't really keep that. There were various reasons and then he, then Pulp Fiction happened 10 years later and he was back on top and then Battlefield Earth happened and then he was back on bottom and then face off and then he was up a little and then he had to put it. I had to put it at eight man. I thought Gilligan's Island was going to show up and I was going to, that's the one I thought. I was like, that's going to fuck me in the ass because we're going to be like, I'd definitely like Gilligan's Island better than Bob, Bob, Bob, Bob, Bob, Bob. Yeah, that was a good show. That one was like, when I watched that one every day, um, again, I feel like that's one where it's like, we're pretty much going to write in episode, make different shit out of coconut. Right. We were all the same page. Fortunately, they would get kind of Scooby-Doo and do some mysterious stuff, mysterious things and always, ooh, I'd always get so like excited on those kind of straight or like when someone would show up. It was like, it was like baby's first lost, you know what I mean, you know, and I think that's one of the reasons lost appeal to me so much because it was like a much more serious Jax is like a smoke show where she'd been on my no homo list. All right. All right. He was on Adobe. He was on Adobe Gillis. We've touched on Bob Denver a little bit. Yeah. We have. All right. Good draft. Those are fun. Mm hmm. All right. Guys want to talk about the game we haven't really mentioned yet that we're doing for today's episode, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, can we take a short break at fire? Yeah, I think we should. Do you want me to do it? You want me to do it, you want me to do it. Bumper, you want me to just pause. Do bumper. All right. Bump it out. Stay tuned. Bump it out. Bump it out. Stay tuned. Get it? The movie. The A. The genre. Hey, the genre. Oh, yeah. For centuries, the society of the Black Dragon has sanctioned an ancient rite of combat known as the Kubite. What is it? Open only to the world's most lethal warriors. It has never been won by a Western era. You are not Japanese. I can do it now. For the first time, the true story of America's super-agent Frank Binks can be revealed. Uncle Sam can't afford to let you get hurt. I'm going to go. Frank is going to fight in the Kuomata and we hear the stuff, an awesome human weapon. There's me just looking at it. Who infiltrates the Chinese underworld. I did not come this far, stuff now. To enter a forbidden competition. Let me just get me in the straight rules of press, you're telling me you never break rules? Where every fighting style, every worthy opponent, every deadly technique, clash in savage combat. Time to separate the men from the boys, and only one will try them. Now I will break you by the international martial arts sensation, John Claude Manban. Blood sport, the true story of the ultimate champion, Gooby Dick, Gooby Dick, Gooby Dick. So, Pit Fighter. Pit Fighter. Pit Fighter. Which according to Google, it popped up all over the place, known more collectively as shit fighter for the SNES. I get it, because it's really bad. There's a good reason for that. Had a weird attachment to not the SNES version, but this game in general growing up. Because at the south side, Mr. Gaddys, they had two arcade machines. A four person Simpsons arcade machine, fucking perfect, great, loved it. Always going to go there. But when that was when that was taken, your only alternative was Pit Fighter, the arcade. Better than this, better than the SNES board. But I played a lot of shitty pit fighter on the arcade games. It was your go-to tie, because of Tyler. That was going to be my first guess, but I also wouldn't be surprised if it was the wrestler. Buzz. Buzz. Yeah. So, I didn't have a chance to do a holiday research on this game, but did this happen before Mortal Kombat? Yes, sir. Yes. So, this was like the first time a video game, like I'm talking about the arcade game. It's used like mocap, stuff, it's an early one, it's not the first one, but it is super early. It's early tech. Yeah. Because I remember thinking, Jesus, this is amazing. Because NFL Blitz did it, and I think I don't know that that's the first one, but I think that came out before Pit Fighter. It was close. Right. Okay. Well, I just remember thinking, oh my God, you know, this is so cool, then I played the game and it sucked. I didn't ever, I never liked Pit Fighter. So, you didn't like the arcade game? I played it a lot. It was hard, and it cost a lot of money because it was so hard, and I'm like you, Tyler, I just, I played it a lot, but I didn't care for it, but there was sometimes when it was like the only thing available. The thing there. Yep. That quarter is burning a hole in your pocket. Yeah. Well, because you got to like, so the SNES is accurate to, at this point, to this point, I should say, you, your life never refills after matches. No. Oh. That's ridiculous. Like in the arcade version, that's like how they like milk, it's like Noah's arcade life. Yeah. Exactly. Like deviousness. But why, you know. I think you even had, I don't know, I think you have multiple lives even in the arcade where you don't in the SNES. I know you do. You have multiple lives in the Genesis version. Okay. I don't know, but I don't know what the arcade, I've never played this game in the arcade. I had never played pit fighter at all in any iteration until yesterday. I just never had, and we've had this discussion before, I've never understood how a home-based video game punishes you for playing it by not giving you more lives or continues or anything to keep going. Yeah. This is all just, this is a real live, real live pit fighting the simulator. Yeah. Your health doesn't refill. One live. No continues. You stepped into a pit to fight. But it's almost not real life because you fight the same three people over and over again, the same night, I guess, because you're not having time to heal, so it's all like that. And they've somehow managed to get stronger. Right. Right. Yeah. They're getting better. Yeah. Like give me some of whatever you're fucking drinking between masks. They got like what the Bane, the Bane juice or whatever. So go on to walk with me for this reference I'm going to. All right. Yeah, let's go. All right. So in Naruto, yes. Madara Uchiha is like, you know, thought this would be the big bad evil guy. Everyone talks moderate. He's the strongest ninjas ever been. He finally, he gets his wish, does everything at the end. Fights might guy. Might guy opens the eight gates. Fights moderate. And a big thing is, you know, moderate at the very end of the fight just goes, that's it. Madara, I declare you the strongest. You are the strongest Taijutsu user to have ever lived. And that's a big, a big, a big, quotable thing from Naruto. My guy strongly eat the God of ninja declares you the strongest at something. You're the fucking strongest at something. So I played this game and then I was watching the videos doing some reviews. And of course, AVGN hits it. And in the moderate moment, AVGN declares this. You, you are the shittiest Super Nintendo game of everything I've ever played. You win. This is it. This is the shittiest Super Nintendo game I've ever played. Quote James. It's not good. It's not good that everything's too small. It's almost set up like a, like a brawler. Yeah. Cause you can move around the arena up and down, not just side to side, but you only got one opponent and that opponent is always the crowd is also your opponent. If you get too close, they'll push you and hurt your lot. Yeah, drain your life. That's why I hated the arcade because I was scrolled too far back and suddenly like an eighth of my, a hillbilly hit you with a, with a stick, a two by four. Yeah. And, and it was like the, your opponent's always too overpowered. The moveset is hard to use moving around the room, the arena is, I don't know. I just didn't. Yeah. No, it's the controls. It was so bad in every way. The sound was garbage. There's one song in the game, the entire game. There's one song and it's, well, I mean, they didn't have to write much because either you die or you beat the game, which takes a whopping 11 minutes. If you know what you're doing. Yeah. I watched a long play today. I did too. You have to know what you're doing. I played her 15 minutes and was like this game is, this game is awful. Yeah. Like it's, it is awful. Yeah. I have a weird appreciation for bad games, but like this one is, there's nothing to appreciate. There's nothing to appreciate. There's no options. There's no, the only choice you have is what fighter you want to use. And that's between the kickboxer and the wrestler guy and the, uh, there's multiple players. There's one redeeming factor that this game has. And that is when you choose to play as buzz. He and his character select flexes his biceps and then doing so breaks the frame. Brace the boxes around him. Yeah. There's your, there's your one good thing about the other is just like tide, just like kicks. Uh, his foot goes into the foreground and the, you know, the cano just punch it punches whoop, but so, yeah, cause it is, and it's unbelievably difficult. Yeah. And I remember there was a trick. I had to go back and watch a ton of videos. So I guess there were special moves in the arcade version that didn't port over. So the closest thing, um, and I, what, from what I saw you had to pick tie is to press R, R is a basic punch and do an elbow. Yeah. That's the only way I beat two guys just pressing the first fighter, what's his name, the, the wrestler. He, you can do R with him and he does an overhand smash with both hands, which is kind of the same sort of deal. And that's how I got through two fighters, which was with this overhand smash. The guy just over and over and over and then the third fight it was over before it fucking started. They're so bad. I didn't know, like, I would, I felt like I would press a button and the, there would be a delay, like a big enough delay where it's like, like dragons layer delay. Yeah. Yeah. I know. From a millimeter rushes out and body slams one bunch. Well, and not to mention that is like sometimes if you did manage to pull off a combo. Yeah. Which I did not. The motherfucker would turn buzz, would turn around and flex. I know. Before the opponent was dead and what's up while you're flexing, dude gets up and starts kicking your ass bump you with like your losses, they are all over you too. Like, and it's just constantly want the same sound effect or if it's the woman, yeah. That's what I never got hit by a master poison Cree by Tokyabi and Ultima Online, but I imagine that is like, you didn't rush towards you. And then of course, when you die, you turn black and white. Yeah. You just go greyscale every second arcade and SNES port. That's like the thing. When you die, you go black and white. Every third match is a grudge match where you face yourself. Yeah. And in the long play, I was watching like when you when you go down, you like twitch like you're having convulsions, because it's trying to tell you to move the thing to get up and in the long play when the guy would beat his doppelganger or whatever. It would just lay there and have a seizure is like, God, this is awful. This is horrible to watch. Yeah, the extra blood and bones in Mortal Kombat is somehow less disturbing. Yeah. Get that one. Oh, exactly. Twitch on the ground. So this, I've got the the inverse of the dead horse and that I felt like the pixels were too small. Everything was so small. It's like the size and scope of it is like having a fighting game in a basketball game because it's like you're watching a full court press brawler. You're absolutely right. Everything was so tiny when I fired it up. I'm like, because I do remember pit fighter being big. Yeah, because you're right. It's almost I don't remember the action. It's not on a on the same plane, but it's very, very small. Like I remember it more being like Mortal Kombat like bigger, detailed. Yeah. And they wanted in the video in the arcade game, they wanted to accentuate the detail because they had done all that mocap and all those real images. They wanted it to look real. We wanted to be able to see all the crowd around the basketball court zoom away. The fucking. God. Yeah, it was too too small. There's there's I give a little bit of development history for this because there's just not a lot to say. Honestly, it's a terrible fucking game. This was an Atari arcade game. Yeah. And the home console division of Atari was Tingen, which we know from previous episodes had did not play nice with Nintendo. In fact, they were the lawsuits over Atari reverse engineering, Nintendo's lockout system on their cartridges in order to produce their own cartridges and bypass Nintendo and sell unauthorized cartridges, right, Nintendo didn't like that and that night at the court as it turns out, but they wanted to sell the game on the Super Nintendo Atari wanted to sell the game on the Super Nintendo and so. To get your monkeys ball, which yeah, T HQ. And this is like early T HQ, Tingen did the conversions for like Genesis. I think they did the game boy. I'll be honest. I don't know. This version is like I didn't play it, but it looks like much more like true to the arcade. For good or bad. So T HQ developed this for the Super Nintendo and I think that had a lot to do with the problem. I mean, it was kind of it was shipped out. Right. It was it was shipped out and it's like the game has it doesn't have health. It has cars. It has like readouts. It's like money or there's a plus symbol next to your health. Yeah. And that's your health. Yeah. That's yeah. There's just a number. Everyone loves arbitrary number. It's like you play it like leisure suit. Layers. Only less fun. Yeah. Hey, the numbers turn red when they get real low. So you know the numbers low that you can tell is how else would I know I'm getting my ass kicked. Well, somebody is like numbers illiterate. They don't know. Go ahead and make it red just so they know it's low number. It very much felt to me like this is a placeholder. Don't worry. This is going to be a bar in the future. Like that's what it felt like. The game the arcade game was developed by was programmed by Gary Stark, who is the same Mr. Stark who programmed race driving. Nice. You're racing. Oh, yeah. So he built us in a cave. Gary Stark programmed this game in a cave. I was surprised to find out that none of the Mortal Kombat crew had anything to do with this game. But for sure, like they had something to do with the arcade version. Yeah. Like maybe they did this and were like, hey, let's go work for Midway. Nope. And they sure didn't. Isn't that weird how those two, because it's things kind of developed naturally around the same time. Yeah. That's crazy. And this came out like so close to Street Fighter II. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And there's flashy marketing and I mean, they really sold it for the arcade. They had the, I remember the poster being up for it at Pirates Cove. All this stuff, man, it was everywhere. And then you play it and it's like, oh, well, this is great. This is, this is, it's fine. This is fine. A little bit of pit fighter is fine from time to time. I disagree, actually. So big, big statement for me. This is the first real rival street hockey 95 has had for me on the worst, on the bottom, bottom tier. Look, I agree with you, but I'm over here cringing because it's like, I don't know if it's worse than street hockey 95. I think it's, so I think there's less effort put in the pit fighter. I think, I think pit fighter is. There is less effort. Technically a worse video game, but I still think I would rather play it than street hockey 95. You can at least laugh over the stats and shit in street hockey 95. Man, you're right. There's more entertaining value. There's a little more ability. You're right. Just because you can look at the stats. Well, not only that, the fucking like lame ass shit that they say, I mean, sticky D and like God, I think you sold me. I think I would. I think. All right. Yeah. This might be the worst. This is a historic moment. I honestly, I did not, I did not think that that game would be thrown. I figured, and however many years we're at the end of the list, dude, it's so bad. But at least I feel like we talk about that game. This fighter is like, I don't know, man, he fucking like, you like fucking push buttons and punch it happens and you lose and you got to lose and you got to start all over. Hey, what happens? Would you beat the game? Don't worry. Game over flashes. It's the same as if you lose. You know, first it flashes new champion for like 40 seconds, you know, and then game over. Well, wait a minute. Thanks for playing. This is important. I might be doubling back on what I just said. Maybe street hockey 95 is not dethroned because in street hockey 95, when you win a game, you're not put on a pallet on a forklift and lifted up three inches in the arcade in the arcade. It goes up. There's money under it and the forklift goes up with ladies and boobies everywhere. I'm not sort of fine, man. I'm not going. Yeah. Yeah. This is dangerous. The inspector's here today. We can't put you. I want the fighting, but now we can't live this up for three inches. I know we're having deadly man on man. But God damn it, oceans here and I can't close my place. I'm union. I'm not even supposed to be here. You're going to call me God damn scam, man. I can't. It's so dumb, man. It's so dumb. So we've got the forklift and we've got buzz breaking out of his frame. The forklift is only good because it's so laughably bad. There's no point in this forklift and I'm like, well, maybe it goes up higher if you do better. It does. And then I watched the gameplay where the dude beats it 11 minutes and it's like, it goes up a little bit more. It's like two pixels more. Jerry, he's hit the 11 minutes. Fine. Oh, there. Okay. That's the best I can do. From there to there. I will lose my certification. The truck is here. We got on low. Get off. You're supposed to be the supervisor this week. Come on now. God, that was good. Yeah, man. It's fucking up. I kept waiting because I remembered that from the game and the arcade and it was money. It was cool. I was like, oh, okay. It's kind of manly. You could go a little bit higher in the arcade game. Not a lot. You didn't like it. I never went to the top. Like maybe, maybe I've seen some make it a quarter of the way that forklift, even in the arcade version. You guys got to be achievements for this game. I have seven. They are achievements like one for each deadly sin. No, but that is a really good idea. All right. You ready? Hit us. Hit us. My first achievement is Zit Fighter. To get Zit Fighter, you play this game in the arcade as a teenager/young person and just know that this is the absolute best that video game graphics will ever get. And if your parents won't buy it for you, they can go to hell if you're in prison. Breakout. Is there a theme to these? Yes. Yes. Good. My next achievement is Zit Fighter. There we go. When any fight by spamming the same button combo over and over. I got that one. I like that one. Me too. Me too. My next achievement is Split Fighter when every Grudge match because you're playing against yourself. See? Yes. My next achievement is Quit Fighter and to get Quit Fighter, give up after losing the second fight with every single fighter. My fourth, my next achievement is Tit Fighter AKA, AKA, AKA Get Fighter, defeat all female opponents. My next achievement is Tit Fighter. You stole mine. I had that too. Win with Tite. Yeah, that's good. That's the first one we've had exactly. Exactly. It's actually 100% the same achievement. Nice. Well done, sir. My last achievement is Pit Fight Club. Play Pit Fighter, but don't talk about it. That's it. Nice. I've got a couple. I've been doing this without notes open. I'd better open them now. Okay. First, achievement. Forklift Certified. In order to unlock Forklift Certified, just win a match and get on the power. It's hard. So hard. My next achievement is Audio Meme. So please, I apologize in advance. Bear with me. Buzz's face pasted over Mo Sislak's face as he's throwing out Barney who has CC's face post-pasted on him, and then Barney with CC's face immediately appears behind him. In order to unlock that, you fight to save dude, and then you're like, "Surely, this is gonna stop." Then he shows up a third time. CC can't be killed, but you know this. CC's too tough to give up. It's pride fucking with you, CC. Next achievement is Mr. Gary Stark. I don't feel so good. In order to unlock Mr. Gary Stark, I don't feel so good. Your body needs to turn grayscale while playing this version of Pit Fighter. Mm. Good. My next achievement is try to go to Amsterdam. They threw us in Guantanamo. In order to unlock, try to go to Amsterdam. They threw us in Guantanamo. Get caught smoking weed, and you're forced to listen to the only music track in the Pit Fighter game for 24 hours straight. Truly. Truly. Truly. Not only is it one track, it's like four bars. Yeah. I mean, it's out of you, yeah. I just watch an episode of it's all Kirby enthusiasm where Bill Hader is on it and plays all these different characters, plays different characters, this like a foreign dude and all these different restaurants that refer themselves to each other, Igor, Timor, Larry, Larry goes to each one like, what is this? I'm going to kick back. Why are you in there? All bad, but referring to it's really fucking good. Man, you bring up Bill Hader reminds me I've been on this Jiminy Glick kick or it's just a lot. I just watch Jiminy Glick clips on YouTube and the one with Bill Hader is so fucking good. It's so good. I have to check that out because I didn't know there was one. Speaking of, only murders in the building started that particular clip with Bill Hader. Yeah. I have to wash that for sure only only I was just saying only murders in the building started up season four. Yeah. I have not. It's good. It's good. I'm going to get back into it though. I'm excited. You got knee achievements. I had Thai Thai. I had Thai fighter. Thai fighter, be named Tyler and play this game. There you go. There you go. That's nice. Then I had K-Nope, play as K-Nope and lose immediately in the first match. He supposedly, I've heard the hardest one to play as. I didn't realize this, but like the character you select is also the difficulty setting. Are you serious? I do not know that. This is supposed to be like the opponents are easier than they could play as Thai who's like middle of the road and then Kato is like the opponents are super. Oh man. I had no idea. Much easier time with Thai than I did with Buzz. Well, maybe I, maybe I'm wrong. I had, I had a better, I had an easier time with Buzz. I started with Kato because I was like, "Oh, Bruce Lee, this is going to be the best." Then I got fucking white and then yeah, played as Buzz. There's a YouTuber I like a lot called Matt McMuscles and he talks about like video games and he's got a bunch of different series. This is part of like his series he's doing of like the worst fighting games. This actually came out like it's kind of a recent-ish video. I think it was like three months ago and I remember he mentioned that in the video. It's like a hidden, hidden difficulty and then my last one is Andy Kaufman, inter-gender wrestling champion. Beat all the female poof. Nice. Nice. We'll see what Flopsy has to fucking say about that. Yeah. What do you think? I haven't looked it up. This has got to be a half star. It has to be. If anything, it's got to be a half star please or rates high, excuse high once. Can we change this segment? Here we come together as a group to give one single rating in commonality. It'll be one star. You think it'll be one star? I don't think it'll be one half star. I don't think it'll be one half star. If they give half stars, they could be- They do give half stars. Dude, like they've given like three and a half and- Yeah. But I don't know. Well, I wonder if the minimum threshold can be half. Yeah, I don't know. We've not yet run into one, but today might be the day, fellas. I mean, hells of street hockey 95 was dethroned. What anything could happen? Did we do? Was flopsie around for street hockey 95? You know, I don't. I don't remember. I want to look up street hockey. Let's look it up. Let's start out with that. Let's start out before we come to our- Yeah. Yep. All right. Because if it's not half a star, then the minimum threshold is one. Right. Yes, exactly. So, according to flopsie, the ultimate Nintendo guide to the S&S library in 1991 to 1998 by Contracurency Monster, Mike, and Shadow Mysteries, been a factor. Street hockey 95, god almighty, what the fuck? Two and a half stars. Wow. Please tell me who rated that. Who is the reviewer on that? Is it Kai? Is it fucking Kai? DG. DG. Fuck you. So that doesn't help. I don't know. So if the minimum is one or two and a half stars. Look, if they give shoot hockey 95, two and a half stars, pit fighters at least a one. I'm coming off of that half star. It's a one. One. I agree. Let's just roll with one. Had to be in common? I bet common. Because I mean, we all heard of this, at least the arcade game. It's pretty early. It was probably cheaper to produce because it was, well, actually no, I'll take it back because it was THQ. They didn't do a lockout work around on the SNES, just the NES. I still bet common. I could get behind common. I mean, everyone's heard of pit fighter. I mean, if you played video games in the early '90s, you heard of pit fighter. Yeah. Even if you didn't play it. Right. OK. One star in common. We're all in agreement. We're all in agreement. All right. I like this. I like this teamwork. Yeah. I like it too. It's nice. All right. It's just going to take me a little bit longer to look them up because I want to be part of this. So I don't want to accidentally see it ahead of time. That's absolutely fine. We usually need something to fill the moment with anyway. I think it goes to Hollywood as a game that we haven't played yet. Is that a movie? It's like hot evening movies in Hollywood. We're talking about the Pink Panther. Uh-huh. I thought we did that one. I thought you all did that. Mm-mm. We did chess or Cheetah games. Yeah. Too cool. Too full. I mean, you could watch it. We could watch it. Full man can't be full again. You'd have to watch the Pink Panther, one of the Pink Panther movies. We could watch the Steve Martin one. Boys. That's true. Oh, God. Boys. Did we get it? I am happy to announce. We bring great pride to announce that Flopsy gave Pit Fighter one star and it is availability is common. Nice. We did it. This is how it has to be. This is how we do it. This is when we work together as a team. We got it right. In one. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. I'm not even reading the reflections. We know it's bad. We don't need to be telling that. We know what it's going to be. Unless they specifically mentioned Street Hockey 95, I'm not interested. Oh, the thing that money. Yeah. How much do you guys think Pit Fighter costs if you were to buy it? Like right now. Right now. Used. On average, of course. You know what? Price charting. OK. Dot com. Oh, well. That makes it not price charting dot gg. Not price charting the magazine dot EU. I don't like eighty four francs. I don't know. I'm going to say eight eight dollars, eight dollars, eight dollars, five dollars, very respectable guesses for a one star, common video game, actual retail value of Pit Fighter loose on average for the Super Nintendo, according to price charting dot com at the time of this recording is six dollars, nineteen cents. Let it right down the middle. That's about right. I feel like that's about right with free shipping. Oh, yeah. Oh, man. It would hurt. It costs more than the game, probably. It depends, man. Would you buy this for six nineteen if you didn't have to pay shipping? Yeah. Just to say, I mean, it's it's kind of legendary. You know what I mean? It's kind of one of those. Do you think that that bad rap that it has would cause it to be worth more almost? Yeah. I think others are more well adjusted than I am and they're just like, yeah, I'm not going to buy that. I'm no dummy. I am. I would buy it for six, six, nineteen in a shop. Maybe I'll go check out Game Galaxy and see if they have it for six, nineteen. I bet they'll I better be more expensive than six, nineteen at Game Galaxy. Maybe not. I don't know. He played this game, but just like the arcade game. It's the same. Grab it. It is of literal direct horror. I love the idea of a used video game salesman who is like just. Hard about it. And like this is pitch and all the games slaps cartridge. Yeah. You don't have any bet pixels you can fit in this bad boy. He has no social boundaries. I'll say this about infinite collectibles. I know back in the day, like a long time ago when we would go, their games were like crazy, like expensive recently when I've gone and when I say recently over the past, like I don't know, three years. I feel like they've been really good about like keeping up with price charting. It almost feels like. The last two games I bought for you have been there and they were fair. Yeah. I feel like they're I feel like they're really like checking price charting and adjusting. I've been having a copy of Illusion of Gaia for you. I don't always buy a copy of Illusion of Gaia for Dave, but what I do, which is more often than you might think. I was clean in that room and I was that copy of Illusion of Gaia. It was so funny because I was like, don't I own this already? And I was like, oh yeah. I haven't needed to go by there and see like what if they have any good, if they have any Overwatch Funko's that I can't find anywhere else. They've got some cool figurines there. I have to go. They have some anime stuff. A lot of Dragon Ball stuff. Trying to fill out my Overwatch. I got like two thirds of the Overwatch tops now. I just got to get. Damn. That's good. That's a lot. I got good prices on Mercari. Some of the boxes don't look great. I don't care about that anymore. People die in Mercari seller side. I know. I know. That's good. Stay healthy friends. Yes. Tyler. Yes, Dave. And today, talking to you boys about men that we would masturbate to and TV land shows. That we would masturbate to. That we definitely masturbated to. And a pit fighter. Of course. So bad we couldn't even go to the old format for it. True. Straight to the bitch. True. It went better this way. This is what it deserved. Yeah. It was good. I enjoyed this. It was free for them. I liked that a lot. I feel like it's been so long since we haven't done a movie with the video games. Many, many, many weeks. Yeah. I almost watched Bloodsport. I almost watched Bloodsport. Oh, man. That's fucking good, though. That is good. No, move Filecat mix instead. Tyler, if you were to give this game a beard, it sums up how you feel about it. What kind of beard would be and why? The alleged beard, blood-spattered beard face of Jon Benet Ramsey's brother. Oh, okay. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Almost had me there. Oh, boy. That's a dark beard. That's a dark beard, my friend. One star beard. I'm not even sure it's, I'm gonna be a half star beard. Tyler. Yes, Dave. If you were to give this game a pair of glasses, sums up how you feel about it. What kind of glasses would it be? I would give it the empty, scraped out eyeball of Walter O'Dimm having his eyeballs freshly siphoned out and scooped out by spider limbs. Wait a minute. I didn't see that in the movie that we talked about on a Patreon episode, patreon.com/tadfog. It's coming out. Boy, I enjoyed that conversation that we had. That was fun, fun, fun. Pretty sure Morgan is a black guy on a blue jacket. Who doesn't even come close to it anyway? His eyes. Skip out in 15 seconds. There we go. I love it. Thank you. Two scoops? Two scoops. Instead of the little sun, help the scoops. It's a spider. Yeah. Eyeball scoops. Eyeless. Eyeless Walter O'Dimm. He was breaking the ass, says the spider. Did we need to know that? It's like a shrugging child. Answers on the back of the box. I hope King had pictured like Walter as his childhood bully. So he had to throw something weird in at the end and just... Oh, and P.S. He was rained in the ass by stranger. No, actually, by somebody he loved and cared for. That's worse. That is just physically more common. I don't know. Hold on. Let me ask somebody. What's worse? Steven, could you edit this part? Oh, it's important. It's part of my process, okay. What are the boys debate on this week's tadpog? Well... Now, look, it makes sense because I'm in the book, you see. I'm the voice of God and he was rained in the ass. Oh. Hey, like that beam. I give him the old eagle lion. The bear is based on Smokey the bear, from them commercials you used to like as a kid. Oh, man. The lion is based on ass rape. You know, from Lion the Woods and the Roadrope, ass rape. You mean ass- no, ass rape. Steven, that was Lion Witch and the Hoardrope. We just wrote a port in the general. Yep, we sure did. Sorry. Lion bitch in the Hoardrope. Sorry. Lion bitch. That's the cringe I was looking for. Lion bitch in the Hoardrope. Face rape. Yeah. Ass rape the talking lion. [Laughter] By this episode, I'll build my classic tadpog. Yeah, that's as close as it gets. I might give a text message about that one. [Laughter] Shit. Okay. Well, we're doing page master next week. Hell. Yeah. Secret Lion Witch in the Hoardrope. [Laughter] Thanks for listening, everybody. You can find the show on iTunes, Spotify, not SoundCloud, not Stitcher, YouTube, all over the goddamn place. Lots of shit going on, but most importantly, we got that Patreon. Money please. Money please. Give us money at patreon.com/ tadpog. We will be grateful and we'll spend it on stuff that we're not going to give to you, but we will give you a weekly show where we work very hard to entertain you. Those of you that have given us money, we are very grateful and we hope that you continue to do so. Yes, thank you. We have a list of executive producers. They're the fine folks who donate $20 or more per month to the show. I have no idea if this list is accurate, so I'm just going to keep reading it as is until I get around and figuring that out. We'll do an audit. We'll do it. It's a new month. It's a new business. Time for new business. Do some auditing, but the executive producers, as far as I know, are cubicle monkey, game bug prime, Nathan Eaton, pinball, airplane, archmage, Chris Edler, sorry you couldn't be on this episode. Derek Popes, it's hard for me to do the list after I've been laughing really, really hard for some reason because my cheeks are all swollen up. Yeah, that's a good feeling, man, I know what you mean, yeah, I feel it under my eyes. It's like I got some chaw in there, chewing on your dad's chaw. Derek Popes, sandwich. It's Doc Hollywood. Kathergius, Jeff Miners, congratulations on your marriage. Drink Smith, Joey Webster, sandwich, Pope Bill Hawkins, thanks for the idea for the blind draft. That was fun. Louisville correspondent, Princess Consuela, Banana Handmade, flavor trick, Taren Doll, Canadian Turbo Nerd Thomas, and as always, thanks to Dane for putting our show up on YouTube, each and every fucking week. And Canadian Turbo Nerd, is he Tomás? Tomás, maybe. Maybe he's Tomás. Wonder what part of Canada we're dealing with here. Think about it. Interstates, Walmart. Thank you guys, everybody. Like I said last and next week is Page Master, so we'll do the movie and the game. Our theme song is MOVE, I see more drama, look at that track from the trunkshowabout.com. How you guys want to close it out? There's Jerry. Thank you. Thank you. So until next time. Drop a little Kather horn. Get the goddamn batteries running out. Ted Pogg is hosted and produced by Tyler Holland, Dave Moore, and Ian Chandler. New episodes publish Wednesdays each week and are available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and anywhere else podcasts are hosted. I have a question or comment for the hosts. Call us at 270-883-255-5 and leave us a voicemail. If we like it, we'll play it on the show and respond. Want to send us something? You can do that at Ted Poggs. At Ted Poggs Studios, care of Nicole Nance, PO Box 3785, Paducah, Kentucky, or 2002. If you absolutely must send us a food item, please use caution and good judgment when doing so. Tasty snacks that look or smell funky or are past their expiration date by the time we get to them, we'll be thrown away. Bonus content is available at patreon.com/tagpogg with a minimum donation of $1 per month. You can join in on the conversation by visiting our Discord at fit.ly/tagpoggdiscord. Registration is free and we'd love to see you there. Thanks for listening. And if you haven't already, don't forget to subscribe to our show so you don't miss an episode. Now, where did I put that stinger? Oh, here it is. I did a menu for a restaurant, a Chinese restaurant. I designed a menu for a Chinese restaurant called "Frying Dragon." Oh, my God. And I had to send an email. Because when I was proofing it out, I was like, "Is this real?" And she was Asian. I don't know if she was being the me's or are you Chinese or Japanese? So, yeah, I had to send a really fucking awkward email where it was like, "Here's the proof. I would like to confirm the name of the restaurant is "Frying Dragon." It was. Do you remember the restaurant, the Chinese place in Lexington, "Walk and Go"? I don't. There is a place called "Walk and Go." "Walk." "Walk and Go." And their ad said, "I know it's only "Walk and Go" but I like it." Fucking loved that shit. They were terrible. The food was awful. Wasn't that good? No, it wasn't good. My favorite Chinese restaurant in Lexington was literally called "We Delivery." It gets it out there. It lets you know the most important thing. Man, we loved it. It was good. And they did delivery. Back then, back when I lived in Lexington, there was a place that was like the first-ever like DoorDash. Like you could call this dude and he would go and get stuff and then you would pay him for it when he brought it to you. And I always thought, "Man, he was ahead of his time." It's a great idea. Yeah, this was in the fucking early '90s that he was doing that. Wasn't the hoodie and the blowfish in his car? I don't want to be with you. See, he's skipping. If I know your name one day and we're DoorDash. Oh shit, we're rolling when you're ready, my man. Believe it!