The emotional triggers are any stimuli, whether it's internal or external, that provoke an intense emotional response, because they often stem from past experiences or unresolved issues. - Welcome to Mind Matters with Dr. J. A. Jones. Dr. Jones is the head pastor of the Faith Community Church of God in Orange Park, Florida. Relationships, finances, our spiritual life, whatever it is, our problems start within, in our minds. Dr. Jones explores mental wellness through the application of God's word in our lives. It's just what the doctor ordered. Let's join him now and dig into Mind Matters, because your mind matters to God. - Welcome to Mind Matters, the show that helps you to navigate life with wisdom and grace. Today we're gonna talk about a topic that affects everyone, emotional triggers. Whether it's a word, it could be a situation, or even a look, or a vehicle, or someone that resembles something of the past. Emotional triggers, guess what? It can lead us to react in ways we later regret. But the good news is this. We don't have to be slave to these triggers. I have a special guest with me, Cindy Jones. Thank you for being with me today. - Glad to be here, Dr. Jones. Anything on your heart, anything's going on with you? - Oh, so much is going on with you. - Caregiving, what about a caregiver? - Caregiving, yes. Well, I could say supervising the care of an elderly person in our church. They had no family, but yeah, she's outlived to her family, so but we're making sure she's being taken care of. - How old is she? - She's 85. - 25 years young, right? - Yes, yes. - Absolutely. And it's so important to stay on top of being a caregiver, because a lot of times caregivers can burn out, right? They can have burn out because they love one, they're caring, they're diligently night and day, day and night, round the clock, getting texts from a facility that this particular person that we're caregiving lives at, right? And they don't always do what they say they're gonna do. So that's why it's so important to stay on top of it, but we're so glad to be caregivers and helping those that are less fortunate that don't have immediate family in the area. The one that we are a caregiver for does not have no family. She has outlived everyone, except for a nephew way back, I mean, down south Florida, but we're thankful and we're so grateful to be able to be in that position because it's biblical, right? Take care of the widows and the orphans. And James says that in that particular book and we're thankful for this opportunity. - Yes, yes, and we all need to remember that one day, we're gonna get older if the Lord allows us to live that long. - Sure, oh, I'm gonna live long, you know that, but go ahead. - Yes, Mr. 120. - Absolutely. But, you know, over her years that she's lived, she has taken care of many people. - Yes, she has, good point. - And so she is reaping what she's sown over the years. A lot of times we don't think about what we sow, how we treat people as aging, that one day we're gonna need people to take care of us, you know, and so that scripture will come into play. You will reap what you sow. - Right, I think that's a principle that covers every area whatsoever of man's sowith. - That's y'all sow a reap. - That shall he reap. So thank you for what you do and what God has allowed us to do to help someone, to live a life of dignity and some normalcy, you know, in this particular person's life. So we're thankful and grateful to be a part of that. Thank you for tuning in to My Matters and we're excited to talk about a topic that's so important, how to control emotional triggers. - Yes. - Because we can learn to master our emotion or to manage it and God has given us the ability and the tools in the scriptures to be able to do that and we're gonna talk about that as we get into it today because the first thing is this, as it relates to how to control emotional triggers. Number one, we have to understand emotional triggers. We have to have that awareness. The first step is to understand. Emotional triggers are any stimuli, whether it's internal or external that provoke an intense emotional response because they often stem from past experiences or guess what, Cindy? - Yeah. - Say what? - What? - Come on, say what? - Oh Lord. - Say what? - What? - We can resolve the issues. - Yeah. - Past experiences that so many people today have unresolved issues. Proverbs chapter four says this, I think it's verse 23, "Guard your heart with all diligence, "for out of it springs or flows the issues of life." And that's so important for us to have that understanding. One scripture says, I think it's Psalms 139, search me, oh God, know my heart, try me and know my anxieties and see if there is any wicked way in me and lead me in the way everlasting. When we understand our emotional triggers, it's like knowing your weak spots. When you're aware of what sets you off, right? What ticks you off, what gets you off, what gets you mad, bad and ugly. When you're aware of that, guess what? We can prepare ourselves to respond differently. Because self-awareness is the first key to manage or master your emotions. It's so important, right? So we gotta understand our emotional triggers. - Yeah, I know what those triggers are and that we, the fact that we do have them. - Oh, absolutely. We all have them at one way or another, right? - All right. - Right, so it's almost like, just imagine you're like a computer yourself. I'm a computer. And someone knows exactly the key combination to crash your system. You know, that does happen, computers do crash, but just imagine you are a computer and someone else knows exactly as we say, what button to push. - You're right. - You're a crash and you're a crumble. But you gotta recognize the triggers that it's like, when you recognize, it's like installing an upgrade that stops the crash before that happens, right? And that's key and that's what we're talking about today. So the first thing we've already shared is understanding our emotional triggers. The second thing is this, practice mindfulness, we can use that word and self-reflection. I like to use the word meditation. But if you think of the word mindfulness, let me just give it some context and some definition. Mindfulness helps us to see more clearly, respond more effectively to what life throws at us. And ultimately helps us to make wiser choices. - Okay. - 'Cause we do have options. - Okay. - Now, as it relates to a verb, a mindfulness, for example, to be mindful, we've heard that, everybody has heard that from somebody or somewhere. Just be mindful, just be mindful, right? It points to entering a state, practicing a way of being a moment by moment, gentle and nurturing awareness of what are, what? Emotions and our thoughts and what else? I have, I want audience to know, body sensations. - Okay. - A lot. This is what they say. Communication is about 90% non-verbal and 10% verbal. - Okay. - Because people have a tendency to use facial expressions. - Oh, yeah. - Their emotions, their hands, their feet, their eyes, their nose, their head, or whatever. - Etc, et cetera, et cetera, right? - Right. - So we have to practice mindfulness as well as self-reflection. - Yeah, they even have mindfulness on apps now. How mindful was you today? I don't know how that's being measured, but it's on the app. Mindfulness. - Okay. I would define it as being all there. - Being all there, okay. - Being present. - Okay. - In the moment. - Okay. - Are you with me? Houston, I see you, but are you here? Is your mind somewhere else? Are you listening to me? So that I call, well, I say mindfulness. - Okay, I'm with you, okay, that's good. So thank you for tuning in to Mind Matters with myself. But the key in understanding our emotional triggers, because we're talking about our emotions, right? In our brain is what we call a limbic system, which is our emotional center. The limbic system is a group of structures in our brain that regulates our emotions, our behaviors, our motivations, and our memory. While still a small size is released in the limbic system, it has a big job to help us to interact with the world around us. And we have what we call the prefrontal cortex, which is the front part of our brain. If you touch your forehead, right? Just like I'm touching my forehead and you're touching your forehead, lay hands on you and pray for you, that's right. - Oh, I did it right now. Help me, Jesus. - Yes, help us, Lord, absolutely. But we have that limbic system. And some people just flip the lid because they're too emotional versus logical or intellectual and having a right understanding of the moment. So the prefrontal cortex is the important part of our brain because at the front of the frontal lobe, which is immediately behind our forehead, which I just mentioned, it affects our behavior, our personality, and our ability to plan certain things. And that is so key. The prefrontal cortex is evolved in many brain functions. - Okay. - We gotta understand that because sometimes you've ever been at this space and anywhere you can see outside yourself. - Yeah. - I have. - Yeah. - I have. You can kind of see what's going on. You're within, but you're also without. - Yes. - You can like, oh my goodness, I can see myself. - Oh, well. - I can see outside of myself doing certain things. - Yeah. - Within. - Sometimes you have those experiences where you say something or you say, or as Urkel said, did I do that? - Right. (laughs) Okay, gotcha, gotcha. - Okay. - Whoever Urkel is. - Yeah. - I know what you're talking about. I know what you're talking about. - As family matters, not mine matters. - Right, family matters, but family do matter. We did a radio show on that. If not, we will do one. We will emphasize the importance of family because family do matter to God. And our mind matters to God as well. And that's so important because the prefrontal cortex, like I said earlier, it involves many brain functions. And it's so important because it's the executive function in our brain, you know? Or the ability helps us to self-regulate and plan ahead. And we're gonna talk about some examples of our executive functions. - Okay. - So it's so important for us to have that understanding of these executive functions. Most people don't know they have the executive ability. You know, you can have an executive at the workplace, a person that's kind of in charge or they do certain things, but every individual has a prefrontal cortex and it is the executive function of our brain. - Okay, the area in control. - Right. But they may not know-- - Make the executive decision. - Right, they can make an executive decision. And I think that's so important, right? Send in, making those decisions. Thank you for tuning in to Mind Matters with myself, Dr. Jones and Cindy. I have as a special guest with me today. Today, if you just tuned in, we're talking about how to control emotional triggers. Emotional triggers are commonplace today. People are triggered by certain emotions based on who they're with, what they see, what they have experienced from situations, past as well as unresolved issues. If you have some unresolved experiences in your life, now, I can't tell you what to do, but I think it's important to try to resolve them as much as you can, whenever you can, however you can, and give it the best that you can to get those issues resolved. - Dr. Jones is the pastor of Faith Community Church of God in Orange Park, reaching a heart and world with the love of Jesus. We thank you for listening to Mind Matters, and we encourage you to show support for the many community outreach ministries that Dr. Jones and Faith Community Church tend to. You can give at Faith Communities website, faithccop.org, or just text money sign and the amount you want to give to 833-435-8022. That's 833-435-8022. We are blessed to be a blessing. Now, let's get back to the program. - Now, as we continue today, some of the executive functions are this, right? Controlling your behavior and impulses. That's the executive function, some of them. Delaying instant gratification. - That's important. - Why is that important? Well, again, I call it elevator music when people go into the store and they listen to that subliminal messages and it gets you in a happy place and give you that dopamine when you're trying to go in shops, especially during Thanksgiving or Christmas or a particular holiday, and people find themselves spending more than they planned, right? They say, "Oh, I'ma just go in and get this." But they go in and get this that-- - Something catches their eyes. - That this and this and that and that and this and then they come out with a grocery or they come out with a bag full and they only-- - It's good more than you intended. - Well, again, what happens is the executive function is not engaged. The emotional limbic system is more engaged because life and situations and music has a tendency to minister or open our emotional tank, I call it, and cause us to function from our emotional state rather than the executive function in our prefrontal cortex. That's why people don't delay in gratification, right? You have to delay instant gratification. You also have to regulate your emotions. - Okay. - And we have that ability. Everything I'm saying right now, God has given us the ability through our executive function, through the truth, that is in God's word, that we can keep our heart, that we can go forward and think on the right things. - Okay, that's very interesting, that's good. - Oh, absolutely, thank you. So that goes back to that mindfulness, being present and not letting your emotions be in control. - Absolutely. So here's some other things of executive function that everyone has, planning. You have the ability to plan. - Okay. - We have the ability to make decisions. We have the ability to solve problems. We're not the problem solver, but when we yield our life fully to God, in prayer, in study of the word, in understanding the direction God has for us and being men and women of intention and purpose, God will use us to be a blessing to somebody else that we can help solve their problems. - Yeah. - Right, we have that ability. - Yes. - Right. - Yeah, 'cause we're here for one another. - Absolutely, we're blessed to be a blessing. - Correct. - And Genesis, chapter one, he said, he blessed them and he told them, Adam and Eve, to be fruitful and multiply. God already had that in his plan to bless us. Matter of fact, he said it to them. And I think that's so important as we go forward. Making long-term goals, we have that ability to balance short-term rewards with future goals, right? - Yes, it's good to reward yourself. - Yeah, 'cause we will accomplish small milestones to say that way. - Well, for example, you talked about a diet I think in our last show, and it's all right to have balance, right? If you want to eat a cookie on a weekend or eat something a bit certain, you may not want to eat, you know, I'm a Snickers lover. So, oh my goodness, I could eat a Snickers three times a day and then snacks in between. - Not good. - Not healthy, right? - Not good. - Not good, long-term, right? But it's all right, maybe on the weekend, maybe twice a week. - Reward yourself a little bit. - Reward myself for doing the right thing or keeping my word in place. What about changing your behavior when situations change? What people don't do with their prefrontal cortex, their executive functions in our DNA and who we are as a man and woman of God, we have a tendency to be like a chameleon. Oh, listen, we change based on the moment, we don't keep our identity, we don't keep our integrity, we blend the end. But we have the ability not to blend in, right? You know, when we have something to say or something to do and somebody is trying to cause us to go contrary to our convictions or to our spiritual growth, we have the ability to stay the course, right? And not change our behavior based on being around someone else. You know, how some people act a certain way when they're with certain people, then they act a different way when they went certain. - Other people. - With other people, right? - Okay, so it do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. - Absolutely, absolutely. - So that's what that means. - Yes, also we can see and predict the consequences of our behavior, mind goodness. Yes, we can. Do bad, get bad. Do good, receive good. Give little, become little, right? And you have little. What happens to the people give minimum but they want maximum. They give minimum time or minimum effort towards a goal towards something they're trying to achieve but they want maximum results. It could be in their relationship. They give minimum but they want maximum. They give minimum time to their financial matters but they want maximum return in their bank account. - Wow. - It's not gonna happen. - It's an epidemic right now. - What you mean, an epidemic? - Giving little and expecting a whole lot more. - Well, we're not necessarily talking about money but it's life too, right? - Exactly. - Money is just a part of it. - Yes, yeah. - They give little at work but they want big rewards. - You nailed it. - I nailed it, okay. Let me get a hammer. Let me nail it, little more. Let me nail it down some more. - Yes. - Let me put that. - I've seen a lot of that lately. - You have? - Yeah. - Okay. Hey, again, that's what we're sharing and we're talking about because these are just a few examples of our executive function that God gave us to do, right? It's within our ability to overcome but people live by their limbic system, their emotional triggers. And that's what we're talking about today. How to control emotional triggers. And that's so important because our life is full of different vibes and energy and experiences. It reminds me sometimes to me when I watch the news and bad things happen and someone is interviewing somebody and which is fine. And if something bad happened in their family, if something somebody got robbed or just whatever bad, well, let me just leave it as that. And the interviewer will ask those that are being interviewed. They said, when a person says, what happened to you, how did that make you feel? That's what the interviewer would say. What kind of emotions came across? - So what's your diagnosis, doctor? They are being interviewed based on their, would you go, frontal cortex? - The limbic system, the limbic system, it's being tested, both of them. So the point is this. What's in control or who's in control? Is the interviewer in control by leading the person down a path of, I've seen commentators interview athletes and they wanna get those athletes in an emotional state to say something negative or pessimistic about what just happened on the court, what's happening with a fellow athlete or whatever it may be. So, and it's all right to understand that, but not to stay in the state of negative vibes or negative emotions, right? And they're trying, because they're trying to make news, they're trying to get the ratings, whatever it may be. They're trying to cause that person to say something, they will regret. - Oh. - So that's what this topic today is about, how to control emotional triggers. They may feel that way, but it may not be beneficial to express it or say it, right? We got feelings, right? We don't necessarily need to go away from our feelings, 'cause God gave us an anger and a feeling and happy and all of those feelings are important to who we are, but we gotta have the ability and understanding to make the executive decision. - Yeah, making, understanding the prefrontal cortex and understand the limbic system. - Right. - A teacher class called overcoming a difficult childhood, and we address these issues as relates to our emotional center, our limbic system, how that can get us in trouble, right? - Right. - We call it flipping the lid, flipping the lid. It's almost like you're looking at my hand and you see it, I have a bald up fist, right? You see it, and then this would represent my prefrontal cortex, the front part, and the limbic system is on the inside, which you cannot see. But the more emotional we are based on questions people ask, based on news we watch, based on experiences with negative situations, based on unresolved issues of the past, the more emotional we are, eventually we're gonna get to a point where I call flipping the lid. - Okay. - Coming, unloosed, coming crazy. Meaning it's like a volcano. Eventually a person will kind of simmer. - Some people say coming unglued. - Coming unglued, absolutely. But they, it's almost like simmering, and then all of a sudden it erupts in anger, shouting, it erupts in putting a person's character down. It erupts because people are not engaged scripturally, where it says, you said it, and I love that script. Don't be conformed to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of our mind. - Correct, because you gotta hold it together. - Yes, absolutely. - Yes, because you think it doesn't mean you need to say it. - Absolutely, amen, 100%. So our emotional or actually our executive function, being able to focus our attention. We can focus our attention. - Yes. - That's part of prefrontal cortex. We can't consider many, many streams of information. We can gather information. This is the technology age. But the scripture says this, finally brothers, breathe that scripture, send it if you have it. - Finally, brother in, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report. If there is any virtue, and if there is anything praiseworthy, worthy, meditate on these things. So, and James said, well, I'll say James later, be still and know that I am God, that Psalms 46 and 10. I will be exalted among the nations. I will be exalted in the earth. So, all of this that you're saying today, Dr. Jones is, pretty much is saying to before we react, is get an understanding before we react. - Okay. - You know, where it tells us in all that, get and get understanding. - Yes. - You know, and so once we get an understanding, we won't go to that, let the prefrontal cortex be in control, and we will make, we're operating at executive function. - Well, we want the prefrontal cortex to be in control. We do not want the limbic system to be in control. The limbic system is our emotional center. - Oh, okay. - Okay, the prefrontal cortex is what we think. - Okay, okay. - Well, we think about what we're thinking about, and that's so important. So, thank you for joining with me today. On my matter, Cindy, thank you. - Oh, good to be here. - Now, we're looking forward next week to share more information about how to control your emotional triggers. I love one scripture, it says, "Be still and know that I am God." In Psalms 46 and 10. I will be exalted among the nations. I will be exalted in the earth. We look forward to seeing you next week as we discuss how to identify and control your emotional triggers through understanding, mindfulness, and reframing healthy and coping mechanisms. Part two, we will see you next week. Have a good day. (upbeat music) - Thanks for tuning into another episode of Mind Matters with Dr. J. A. Jones. Be sure to tune in next Sunday at 5 p.m. right here on phrase 107.9. For more insightful discussion about how God's word can get our minds right. You can also hear Dr. Jones preach in person Sundays at 11 a.m. at Faith Community Church of God at 1268 Gainell Avenue in Orange Park, Florida, 32073. Thanks again for listening. Stay mindful and keep striving for improvement because your mind matters to God. (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music)
