2 zooms in one night bad notes time! The Notes: Will is a box wino! Will is the famed snake hunter of Terre Haute! Nelson’s dad was a snake-wranglin man! Does your zombie apocalypse squad need a playwright!? Independence Day 2 is not great, man! How do you let President Lone Star go out like a bitch!? Will’s attempts at nerd fellowship are thwarted! The dangers of short term memory issues in a fantasy setting! The ol’ vaudeville less dead Germans bit!
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Welcome to the Double Doos podcast an amazing show that lasts only 22 minutes and is for you the listener So soak it up. So here you're two big beer hosts Will Avril and Nelson. Hey, we'll hit the timer and we're in Double doo Yeah, I am hitting the box wine tonight my friend Yeah Yeah, I'm I'm officially I think becoming a box wino I mean, you know For the value alone Here's the thing like Life doesn't drink wine. I'm the only wine drinker and and if I so if I buy a bottle I got to either drink the bottle and commit to that or I got a Drink it in like two days, which feels like a lot of pressure But if I get a box I can like have a glass of wine Every night or other night and and and just enjoy that for for up to it says up to 30 days after opening But I think that's a lie. I think you can get about 90 days out of there before really I'm gonna put now maybe you know different different companies different standards of Preservation, but I feel like I've seen two to three months on on there before Yeah, well, I think the white one Box wines. I'm kind of fancy box wine. I'm not as a straight motor box 30 days now It is a red wine and I imagine room temperature probably doesn't last quite as long as I like refrigerated white wine, but Maybe I Guess I don't know. I mean, it's it's still kind of sealed in there. Yeah It probably I tell you about my room temperature still probably better than like warm weather. Yeah, like high humidity or you know Keep your air on Right talking about like helping that like one of the terra hight liquor store and and having a bit of a snake No from the from the liquor store Yeah, well, this is like Wrangler at the liquor store Yeah, it's like like like about three weeks ago I went to Indianapolis to for a conference at The Annapolis I stopped in terra hoy to get some to get some You're a hoyt So sorry terra hote. That's what that's what I'm saying. Yeah. Now. Why would I say terra hoyt? That would be wrong. It was I was confused right I Was saying terra hoyt, but I met terra hote. Okay. Okay. I just want to double check Yeah, now you're not going crazy. I'm just We don't anger any of our Indiana listeners Here's the thing it's a shanty town that town. Wow I've been there, but I've not spent much time there Imagine an entire city of North Topeka and you get sort of your your answer to what terra hote's like Yeah, yeah, like it's like But then I went to the liquor store for my sister. No boy. They've got there. They're in like a Terra hote is like one of the markets within their area See it like Chicago stuff champagne stuff like Springfield stuff and terra stuff. I Feel like it, you know, any animal I mean Apple is in general is sort of a strange city because it's it's like a big city and there's some pretty stunning Architecture there, but I get the sense that there's like not a lot to do right like unless you like eating There cuz that's like all there is to do at night is go somewhere to like eat. They got a bunch of good steak houses But but that's that's about it. It doesn't seem like it's a cultural Mecca But terra hote is like about an Indianapolis Krispy Kreme that and joined the patreon because we did that Yeah, yeah, it's an excellent chance to join the patreon and an excellent chance to hear a great story about Krispy Kreme donuts this month. We talked about juicy Lucy's Yes, we did. Yes, we did. So anyway, our food talk I'm gonna I'm in a liquor store in terra hote and it's two ladies who are running it and One of the ladies is like oh, there's a snake on the floor and the other ladies like I am not paid enough to deal with that And then she looks at me and she's like sir, and I'm like, yeah, she's like sir. Will you help us? I'm like what with the snake and and then the other ones like yeah, I'm like, okay Garden snake, I mean it wasn't a scary steak. It was just kind of an annoying steak and I didn't really want to People like greener black one color. Yeah, it's like a little little black garden snake a little lighter on the belly than the back, but Yeah, it wasn't like it's a fucking cobra or anything You know, then I'm alarming markings or anything color patterns No, no, I mean You don't want the diamond shaped heads are the dangerous ones So I get a plastic bag and I put the I grab the snake through the plastic bag Just cuz you know, I don't really want to be like and feel in a snake and and I throw the the the the snake out out on the grass and I like walk like in and I'm like, all right. I pictured your snake problem expecting they'll give me like a big discount nothing no discount No, no, no appreciation. No wild applause. No No, like you're a hero You know, I don't do life for adulation mighty snake hunter of tarot The mighty snake hunter of tarot is goddamn right So I ambled angrily with my little bottle of cheap wine back to my rental car and And rumbled about it all the whole 45 minutes to Indianapolis I didn't do any like tricks or anything I should have like I should have sung it out of the store. That would have been fun Yeah, I have to sing I should have been Attended to be very mysterious and adroit at at snake hunting Remember one time at a summer camp. There is a big old snake Just off of a campsite one of the campsites for the troop And and some kids were freaking out and my dad was like no problem And he went and grabbed a stick real quick and he broke off the things that you get like one of them You know, I'm like snake there's like snake catching sticks that are like a little y at the end and stuff Yep. Yep. Yep. Yeah, it was real quick and then just wrangled it up with that and into a sack And took it away and we were like, holy shit Yeah, yeah, I'd like to say that I was that good, but no It's especially just how fast he was able to fashion a snake handling stick It took like a minute or two and all of a sudden he was back with a serviceable snake handling stick Did you get the sense that he'd done that before? Oh, yeah Apparently you weren't like he when he was a kid was like Camp counselor in the Rocky Mountains For a bunch of summers, and I guess that that is where he learned how to do it hmm hmm Good good skills. They're teaching those kids. Yes in the Rocky Mountains. Yes What's your what's your most useful skill that you don't get to use on the rag? Oh It's good question. I mean, I still have a little bit of my boy scout training in my mind Like I know I've definitely in the cases of us doing outdoorsy things I can still build a pretty a pretty good fire a strong lasting type fire I know how to do that It's come up. So I'm able to keep that information fresh. I still remember how to do some knots Yeah, I'd do some stuff like that But that I don't use much That's a pretty handy skill There's certainly on our next slide I Have a lot of experience unlike how to To do maintenance on a movie projector, but that's not going to get you very far these days because it's it's all computers now I I think the most effective skill that I know how to do on a practical level. I learned and when I was Traveling around on boats on the Norfolk rods and that is how to open a beer bottle with a lighter And and do it pretty successfully and pretty Regularly right, you know, and it's not Hard once you figure it out, but it takes a little doing to kind of learn the technique But man, like that's a handy skill and if you can give people open beers they like you usually So that was a good skill. I'm happy that I have yeah, I Can write a play but that's you know again like you said not the most usable skill Not incredibly there's there's less useful I guess I mean there's not there's not many situations and when and when someone's like oh my god Buildings about the collapse if we don't get a play right now all these people are gonna die and you're like, okay Give me three months and I'll just knock something up and and then yeah I've never been in a situation where it's like we've got to win this talent show to save this whatever Let's do a play real quick is never come up all of a sudden for me to be like I guess I could write one oh Man speaking of talent shows and and special skills. I remember reading this Colastic book and my friend Jeffrey some Michael's house when I was like fourth grade third grade fourth grade And it was about these aliens that came down and they wanted to play baseball and they're like hey Here's the deal They were like these big centipede like aliens. It's like we're gonna we're gonna play you in a baseball game to determine the fate of the earth and if we win we're gonna destroy your planet and eat you all and if you win we'll leave you alone and So America set up this best baseball team and they were playing and they were winning and then the aliens Cheated and then America lost and then the aliens destroyed the planet and ate everyone It was a really dark ending for a scholastic book that you read in fourth grade And I remember being really angry at aliens and baseball for for a number of months Yeah No, I don't understand that. That's first of all aliens. You got to play fair Right? Yeah, second of all like centipedes not gonna be great at baseball. I wouldn't think You know, I watched I hadn't watched before really I watched the second Independence Day movie The other the other day for some reason I think I was just looking for some kind of movie to watch and it was there And I was like, I don't think I ever watched this and so I watched it and I was like I hadn't been missing much not having no it's Especially I was mad that the president kind of died like a bitch in it. I was like what? He like he like sacrifices himself, but it's a trap Yeah, which is nothing with my sacrifice I thought that was a real betrayal of the first movie That the president, you know, was like it's my turn To give my life to defeat the aliens. You're like now trick you That was some bullshit Really honestly don't remember anything about it and I and I I think something that it was very bad We're very mediocre It was it was nothing special frankly. It was it wasn't like Terrible, but it was also like not is like It's not like the first one's a masterpiece But the first one is a lot of fun and I feel like what it was is not that much fun Yeah Yeah, no, it definitely wasn't and and it's that case of like, you know The first one had that real basic Relatively simple structure and the second one tried to get fancy like try to get like some some extra little plot points Maybe a B story going on there and it's like no this doesn't need a B story. It's not It's not that important It was also like The stakes were raised almost to a point that it became a little bit tricky to track exactly But the stakes were and so or like that I feel like the time scale even though the first movie takes place over like four days I feel like it took place over two or something I don't know. It's hard to tell how many days passed in it, right? And there is like so much more alien to deal with but Somehow like I think did less people die. I don't know the scale. I feel like the My guess is they didn't I didn't even notice I'd error at least I don't think he I don't think they actually got role in Emric There is I feel like if so we would have seen some better planet blowing up stuff happening Like that's a guy who can destroy the planet real good And I feel like they didn't bring him back and that's why the planet destroying was nowhere near as well done Now you I absolutely agree with you on that one for sure. Mm-hmm But mostly is when the president died that I was like nah you lost. Yeah Now you lost me. I Had a speaking of like The main alien was like a kaiju at the end even That was weird. There's just a lot. Yeah, it was a real you know what it a little bit of like Matthew Broderick Godzilla vibes frankly Like I would put that a little where it's like they're just throwing a bunch of shit on the wall to create like a big pile of movie stuff to put in this movie without really Figuring it out at all yeah, I Was gonna I was gonna say I had a little I wanted to give a nerd nerd shout out This is kind of a change of the tack a little bit here, but like a local nerd shout out. I was driving down Castle the other day turning on to like turning on to castle from six and I get behind this car And the license plate is Dovah keen and I was very Amused because for those who follow the lore of elder scrolls games sky rooms Dragonborn is also known as Dovah keen So then I decided I needed to pull up next to them and and and roll down my window and say I used to drive a car like yours before I took an arrow to the knee Because that was gonna be funny cuz that's one of the things that guard guards say in Skyrim is I I I used to be an adventurer like you until I took an arrow to the knee and and and I think they thought I was creeping on them because they like wouldn't I couldn't get parallel with them They kept like either slowing down or speeding up and I was like, okay. This is looking awkward I was just trying to be funny, but I'm now I think I'm actually freaking these people out Um, so I'm gonna stop but it was really nice to see see it a Skyrim car in town like you weren't able to to bask in Skyrim fellowship with other nerds I Thought it would have been a nice bonding moment like I see you I get I get what you've done this You know and and and feel that on your car you should probably be expecting some people to occasionally like make mention of it Exactly, I think you I think you want that I think you're almost you're almost encouraging that but again You know consent is important and and whoever they were either accidentally or purposely Did not did not want to exchange a moment of of jocularity relating to their Dovah keen license plate It's true, and I can think you have to keep in mind that no matter how that cars dress does not Allow for you to behave in a certain way because you want right Exactly exactly you really picked up the lesson underneath all of this. I think in a in a very real and powerful way. This is a very special episode of It's a little do's Where we talk about consent? Yeah and Skyrim yep But that happened yeah Actually, I don't think you ever get consent during the entirety of Skyrim necessarily is that but Well, I mean yeah, but you're you're doing a lot of murders like like you just Whether you whether you choose a good character or a bad character like you do a fair amount of just murdering things Yeah, and just you know too many people like coming after you for no good reason I feel like yeah, I try to not to not start nothing It's other people trying to start shit with me and and I feel like too often I'm willing to finish it maybe Well, and it's like like like say for example like bandits like you know They're they're they're a ton of them and they keep coming back like even if you you get rid of and they're real dumb like if you and I were having a conversation and Like an arrow flew out and it's in the neck and you fell over. I wouldn't just be like what You know like it was there Yeah, I feel like I'm ducking for cover and I'm maybe going and finding a buddy and being like hey They just got Nelson Come help me come help me look for this fucker You know, I don't know you know, they're not good at object permanence. They're not good at uh, you know Like They're short-term memory is bad Yeah, yeah, that's the worst thing like what have you told him important information? You wouldn't No, I wouldn't I wouldn't trust the really most characters in in Skyrim with important information Maybe part the next he's he seems wise does he does I'm trying to figure out a joke about a Skyrim therapist, but I'm just not quite getting there But I feel like with the short-term memory and and not telling him anything important like how therapy works in the Skyrim world as You know, you go through a lot. I Wonder if it's uh, if it's if it's like a if it's just how the land works that there's some sort of natural Like natural like part of the world around them that is bad for memory Like I'd rewatch the the magicians and I forgot that in the show. Do you like magical land? They go to that's kind of that's Narnia ish Like one of the things about it is like the air is like two percent opium or something It's part of it. It's one of the things that makes it magical Especially when you think out you got like little British kids coming there to do adventures Basically just getting highest fuck talking to animals Tristang I'm wondering if maybe Tamriel is on some level similar and that's why people have a real hard time like creating memories Because they they just too damn high I Think that's it. I think that's definitely it and and and and that's uh, that's sort of like Sort of like the student ghetto in Lawrence, too So, you know again makes me maybe a little more sense why that person's running around with a Lot of my 20s Who does do you remember your 20s? Let us know hashtag. I remember DD and Are you awesome? Whoa, you just threw out a value judgement there hard right in the last 20 seconds of the show Yep damn Sorry achievement unlocks Sorry, no, no that by the time this comes out because we're recording this a week ago And I'm I'm seeing post-season royal stuff on TV. I'm really hoping that the royals Came back in and beat the Yankees and won that series in the in the weeks that has happened Between this recording and and this coming out Only time will tell not only, you know, it's I feel like it's that that Doubly good of I love the royals and I hate the Yankees. So it just feels like we got to do it This could be the ultimate vengeance This is what America needs right now American America needs in all a al west alcs Sorry al central alcs. I mean Yeah Three out of the four teams it's it's our division and the Yankees left by God There you go And on the other side they got Japanese Babe Ruth Well hard to argue with that one No Don't do it Listeners he wanted to you can see it in his eyes He's he's balling his hands up into fists and he was shaking and His eyes were wild with rage and he was twitching But it's past now Now it's past the storm is over the Sun is out All clear all quiet on the Western Front But less dead Germans double doos Still some dead Germans, but much less man. You went for the less dead Germans ending. That's that's wild Yep, the all less dead German sending That old chestnut from the days of vaudeville You heard it here last Double doos Podcast if you thought the intro sounded bad Thanks for listening I don't know how you did but if you're trying to listen to more we're everywhere Libson Apple Google Stitcher Spotify fucking everywhere. That's right. We're a fine podcaster made We'll be there also you can reach out to us on social medias We're at double doos pod on Twitter We're a double doos podcast on Facebook and our email is double doos pod at gmail.com Finally, if you want to support us get our patreon on patreon.com backslash double doos pod Yeah, we got all kinds of stuff on there We got me talking about things. I'm seeing we got extra minis that like the minis you find in the deck of deuces We got will singing or if you want to pay for him not to sing there is a way to pay for no singing The world's your oyster all kinds of stuff all kinds of stuff so much stuff. That's patreon.com backslash double doos pod Yeah, yeah Sorry when you're like wherever fine podcasts are found. I just kept thinking about that tom jones beach It's the end of grapes the rat. It's like wait wait. There's a cop beating on a fun podcast. We'll be there Double doos Good episode [BLANK_AUDIO]
