(upbeat music) - Hello everyone and welcome back to another installment of the viral podcast. I'm your host, Chelsea Lynn. - And I'm your host, Paige Jen. - Jen, Jen, Jen, Jen, Jen, Jen. - Jen, Jen, Jen, Jen, Jen, Jen, Jen, Jen, Jen, Jen, Jen. - And over there we have malt and stick. - We got malt and stick over there, malt and sticky. And before we get started, I'm not wearing any pants. - Okay, or a bra. - Or a bra. - Oh, never a bra. - Right, but no pants. - It trips me out when people actually wear bras. - Yeah, I'm like, what you doing that for? - Yeah, let the nips free and I can just breathe. They need oxygen. - Exactly. - That's why there's all those little holes at the end of your nipple. - You nailed it. - Is the timer going? - Timer is, right now it is. I forgot to push start, it's just started. - It's started. - Timer's going. - Got it. - You guys, tonight we have a live viral podcast at Zaines here in Nashville, Tennessee. (upbeat music) (upbeat music) - Yeah, a little bit late. - And then November 5th, Minneapolis. November 7th, Chicago. And then the 9th will be in Indianapolis. The 10th, Columbus, Ohio. The 11th, Detroit, Michigan. And then we're gonna be in Philly, Boston, New York City, Charlotte, and we're ending the live viral podcast tour in Atlanta, Georgia. (audience applauding) - Thank you so much to everyone who's been coming out to show. So far has been a frickin' blast. - Yeah, yeah. - Wow. - And there's nowhere else I'd rather be than touring. - No, maybe I'm trying to think. - Living live on the road. - I do it 'cause I love the fans. - That's why we're touring today. - Get your tickets at devourpodcast.co and come see the podcast that you're watching right now live. - That is a weird thing. I was thinking about it the other day, like all these people are going on podcast tours, you know, and we're just kinda sittin' there talkin'. - Talkin' and having fun. You never know what's gonna happen and you never know what we're gonna wear. - But isn't it a trip? All these people can now have the opportunity to go bring a show on the road. - Yeah, it's incredible. - It's a trippy one, huh? - It's incredible. - 'Cause it's usually just stand up or singers. Now we're gettin' into podcasts. I wonder what's next. - Oh, Jimmy's, you know what's funny? I was watchin' this clip. And it has nothing to do with what you're talkin' about. But it reminded me of it. - Yeah. - Triggered somethin' in me. - No problem. - That they say you have senses, right? Your four senses. Touch. - Oh, isn't there five? Is it five? What is it? - Jamey. - Jamey. - Jamey. - Smell. - Smell. - Tachy. - Tachy. - C. - A little C, a little. - Tasty? - It's somethin' like tasty. (laughing) - A little. - You know what I'm talkin' about? The senses. - Why am I? - Yeah. - They're saying that-- - Jamie. - Yeah, look what's up, Jamie. They're saying that there is actually 26 senses that we have not unlocked yet. - Whoa. - If we haven't unlocked 'em, how do you know there's 26? - I know, maybe they have the key, and they're just waitin' to unlock it. - Yeah. - And they know where it's at. - Like the government's holdin' back on us. - Yeah, they're like, here's the other 18 senses. - They're only givin' us one sense every thousand years. - Yeah, just like technology, just a little bit at a time, here you go. Oh, here now you can air drop people. - Yeah. - Now you can, you know, they just kinda hold us back a little bit. - Absolutely, right, what are the seven senses? - Oh, the main fiber, sight, smell, hearing, taste, touch. And then I guess it's called vestibular and pro-price-ception, which is just an extension of touch, and the other one's kinda balanced. - Balance, okay. So they said there's 26 more. So when are they gonna release those? - 19. - Maybe they'll do it in a little 27 part series. - Like a Netflix series? - Yeah, well, Netflix series, okay, here's your next sense. - I'm curious, because what if, you know, and keep it, we have six more minutes left, but what if the nuts are better? - Yeah, that was kinda gone through my head. But I did hear about a sense already. I think it was on Theo, a girl was on there saying that one of the senses was-- - Mount Steak? - Got instinct. - Oh, that makes sense. - So if the shrimps are big shinging, like, you know, if you fear something and you go with your gut, it's because of a sense. - That actually makes sense as being a sense. - Yeah. - That actually makes a lot of sense. - We should come out with a movie called The Seventh Sense. - Yeah. - What about-- - And what would it be about, Brad? - Just, you know, an extension of that one movie, the sixth sense stop. - You'd be copying off another movie. - But, I mean, not really, I would just remix it, so I'd get all the credit. - Imagine learning English and you're like, okay, give me your two cents. Does this make sense? Like, every sense just means so many different things. You know, I like the smell of that scent. - Yeah. - It's like, what is going on? - Well, so we're always trying to come up with new, cool, funny words. - Yeah. And then they're like, what's the small flakey? (laughing) What's small steaks? - Yeah. - That's great. - I wonder if other, like, you know, wing, they probably have-- - Oh, absolutely. - Those that, I wonder what they are. If you are here in the comments and you got a lingo in another language, let us know. - Let us know. - It's like smoking a fag. - So we could take it, oh, yeah, smoking a fag. - That's a British, they call that serrets. I hope we don't get, I hope we don't get, yeah. That's okay. You didn't know, Brett. You didn't know. You were trying to be cool by saying a word in a different country and you, yeah. - I wasn't thinking. - You weren't, yeah, that's okay. That's okay, Brett. (laughing) - God, I was gonna better say something. Oh, thank you guys for listening. Thank you guys for commenting. Thank you guys for subscribing. Thank you guys for downloading. - Click and sharing. - Hey, baby, click it. - Super spreadin'. - They be clickin'. - Clickin' and spreadin'. - And I will say this, I've been seeing a lot of comments from people and whether it's on Apple reviews, YouTube, anything, a lot of Deans from people saying that they're new listeners. So we've been doing this podcast, how many years? - About three to four, so I don't know. - Three-ish. - Yeah, I've noticed that too. I've seen a lot of those. - A lot of like, hey, I just started listening to the pod. I just discovered the pod. Thank you guys for being here. - Thank you. Please let us know where you found us though, 'cause I like to know that. You know, I'm like, how did they just stumble upon this podcast? - Yeah. - Were they just clickin' on YouTube or were they in their car and just accidentally clicked on us? Or did we come after a podcast, I wonder? I wonder if people-- - I can't get off. - You can't get me. - That's all Brett. That's in my head all the time. - Oh, and I just wanna say this, okay. We have a series on Slits Only. If you're new around here, it's every Friday, we do like an extra little mini viral podcast. It's on my Patreon, pages OF, and we do different things each week, but we've been doing this thing. We've been doing it for a while now, but we just started really ramping up the episodes. This extra little podcast called Positive Talks, and you might've seen the clips on TikTok. They've gone viral. - Viral. - Where me, Paige, and Maggie dress up as, I wouldn't say elderly, but I would say, you know-- - Early 90s. - Early 90s turk. - Oh, women. - Not early 90s age, but like women from it, like-- - Era. - Yeah, like that era, that aesthetic, the clothes are very 90s. - We kinda don't even know what we are. It kinda just started morphing into something. - Well, they're like middle-aged women. We wear wigs, and we basically go into character. Our character, my, I'm Janine Johnson. - I'm Debbie Dotson. - I'm Donna Carlisle, and we have Southern. We're Southern, pristine-- - Bells. - Baptist, proper women. - So that's Southern Bells. - But they're not. They're actually-- - Unhinged. - They're actually unhinged as hell, and my character is just so out of control. - So out of control. - Past of aggressive, it's unreal. Anyway, so we've been doing this series for a while, and the first few times we did it, I got a lot of comments, people either hated it or loved it. We got a minute and 47 seconds. - Okay, do it, let's count down. - 10 seconds, okay, I got you, I got you. And anyway, people didn't love it at first, but I had so much fun doing it, and I thought it was fun, so I was like, I don't care I'm doing it anyway. - Oh yeah. - It has become the number one thing people request, my DMs, if we go two or three weeks without doing a positive talks, people are on my butt, people are, where's positive talks, we want this to be a weekly episode, like people are obsessed with positive talks, so I've been taking clips and posted them to Instagram, TikTok, and they have gone viral. - By viral, they have. - People come up and say-- - That's what I was going to say. - Yeah. - We were in the airport, that's where I was going with this. We were in the airport, and this guy comes up and goes, I usually add a whole stick. - And we've died, we're the Dallas airport, I usually add a whole stick. - I usually add a whole stick. - I would have died. - Yeah, we were laughing, our ass, ooh. - That's what you say, you say, yeah, yeah. - Yeah. - That's okay. - A shot battery. - Yeah, a shot battery, a show. - But I thought that was funny because people have been coming up and saying things from positive talks, I usually add a whole stick, so if you watch it-- - Well, we're crying, good people are really moved by it, actually. - Yes, I want to go watch from episode one. - Yeah. - 'Cause it's completely different. - We've changed our voices at least a hundred times. - And Wigs, I feel like we're starting to protect, not perfect our characters. - Uh huh, and protect them. - Yeah, and protect them. - And we actually have a storyline now, so we have such a fall back on. - And it's the most ridiculous storyline. - Ooh, I'm sorry. - Fuck you! - Fuck you! - If you were asked to count down at 10 seconds and you weren't paying attention, fuck you! - Fuck you, motherfucker! - Fuck you! - If you don't watch positive talks, fuck you! - If you have a hemorrhoid and somebody doesn't eat your ass because of it, fuck you! - Hey Brett, fuck you! - Hey, fuck you, timer. - Fuck you, man! - Fuck you, shall see! - Fuck you, babe! - Fuck you! - Fuck you, Maggie! - Fuck you! - Hey, uh... - Oh yeah, happy birthday, Mom, and happy birthday, Rachel. - Woo! - Woo! - It's Mom and Rachel's birthday! Happy birthday! - Happy birthday. - Happy birthday. - Isn't that weird, though? - Deney, you know you just come, like, sliming out of the badge. - Oh yeah! - You came from Nut? - Yeah, it's crazy. My dad reminds me of that all the time. - You came from this. - Oh yeah! - I came from that moat. - You came from that. - It's just crazy how we can form humans. If you don't want them, they don't have to go. - It is weird how things happen. I've always said I think it's weird how people have sex. - Oh, dude, even a car going down the street, and how's it going? - Yeah. I was thinking about the other day, I was like, it's weird that people get together and have sex. - It is. - If you think about that, that's really a weird thing that we do. - Yeah, we're almost just animals. - It's just helping each other out in a way, you know? - It is, yeah. - It's a weird human instinct to want to do that and to need to do that, and then you do it. - And then you do it? - Yeah. - And it's weird. - And if you don't do it, you just go off the walls. - Yeah! - You'll do it to a doll. - Yeah, I mean-- - Or the side of the couch, technically. - I've done a couch before. - Oh, you've done a solo cup. - This is a dixie cup. - If you are new around here, Brett is talking about, I talk a lot about, you know, when I was younger and I had dolls, I did used to fuck 'em. - Bustin' not so bawdy! - I had a doll named Bonnie. - Bonnie, and I would hump the shit out of her and I would bust. - You said you would fold her a certain way when she was getting out of it. - Well, she was like a pillow, she was like a soft doll and I'd fold her and I'd just get on her and hump her. - That was a little funny. We used to have a chihuahua that had a little dolphin toy and this dog would hump the shit out of that dolphin toy. - A dolphin? - So, even dogs hump dolls. - Yeah, people would just be humping anything they can. - Those hump air sometimes. - Yeah. - You had the first kind of my pillow. - Yeah. - But it was Bonnie. - Her name was Bonnie though. And years ago, years ago, I told Greg this in confidence. Stop, and then he started making fun of me for it. And then I was like, you know what? Who cares? Maybe I'm the only person in the world that's ever humped dolls so I talked about it on the pod. And I, years later, we'll still get messages. - I hope I don't. - Chelsea, I used to hump my dolls and I was so ashamed of it and I'm like, no, don't be ashamed of humping couch cushions, couch the sides of couches, hands, I used to hump my hand, dolls, it doesn't matter. - Squash. - You got yellow squash, you gotta do it, you gotta do, have no shame. It doesn't, who cares? Hump and get your nut. - Yeah, I used to hump my grandma's three-legged leather chair. - I thought he was gonna say like a three-legged dog or something. - Dog, oh no. - I don't judge the hell out of you. - Oh, no, not a dog. - Okay, yeah, yeah. Just make sure it's not a dog or nothing. - Oh yeah, don't grab something with a heartbeat. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Stay away from any heartbeat, really. - Yeah, unless it's another human. - Sure, and like, yeah. - And over the age of-- - Absolute. - Oh, the Dickey. - For sure. - A three-legged leather chair. That sounds great to hump. I'm sure that would get me off. - Had prongs, kinda. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Anyway. - So. - So. - So. We've been doing a lot of talking. - Oh, one more little thing though, before the little lean forward. - What? - Before we started the pod, we were talking about chat GBT, and she'll go, (laughing) - I've never heard a chat GBT. - Well, I said, Brett, what have you been doing? He goes, I'll just chat GBT. And I go, what's that? And he freaked out on me, 'cause I didn't know what chat GBT was. - I didn't freak out. I was just surprised, and I thought that was pretty cool that you didn't. - Hey, Brett. - Yeah, you freaked out. I don't know what that is. So what is it? - Really? - Well, it's just-- - You said I'll tell you on the pod. - I'm pretty sure we've already told you on the pod. - Well, it's like AI. - It's AI, you know, you can pretty much, I had some time to really look into it, you know? - Alan Addison. - And it's pretty much just like a really awesome Google. - Like I learned at a, you know, design an app. - Is it the one where you type in like girl wearing jeans in a field of tulips and it pops up with that? Or am I thinking of something else? - It can kind of do anything you want it to do. - Yeah, it could do that. But let's say if I wanted to find like nearby lie detector people in Portland or something like that. - So it's Google, so it's Google. - So it's Google. - What's with the puffer fish? - What happened to me conversation? - Anything you want to know, anything you want to find out? - So it's a search engine. - It's a really awesome one. - But what makes it awesome? - Like you could say, hey, write me a screenplay and it'll write you one. - Oh, so did you write your own episode of Tambings? - No, you can't do that with Bloreman. I found out about it after, you know? - I bet got mad at you. - I know. - Some people will-- - He's going to be doing it now. - Sometimes chat GBT will write an entire stand-up set for some people. - Yeah. - What? - So people are getting accused of that, you know? Stealing? - Well, where's it get it from? Is it get it from someone else? - Little chatty boy. - Kinda. - I mean, so-- - I don't know. - I know who's writing this thing and then it's like-- - Like you could be like, no, make it funnier, make it funnier, make it funnier, make it funnier, more funny, more like-- - Hey, Jamie, look who owns chat GBT. - Okay. Look up who owns chat GBT, chat GBT. - Look at what's just gallery. - And how I watched him lay on his set. So it's just like AI. - So if you wanna learn how to make beeswax, it'll tell you, you know, rather than watching a bunch of YouTube videos and doing research, it'll just say do this. - Step by step. - Like it's just anything you wanna know, you don't even have to think, it'll just, and it'll tell you how to do it. You know, like, can you just do it for me? And then it'll do it for you. - I don't even use it, but I know a lot of people do, and with podcasts too, they can almost imitate a voice to the T. So people can type, say this as this person, and it will say it out loud and sound like-- - That can't be-- - Another creep. - Oh, yeah, it's not good. - That can't be good. That can make you say anything. - So now there's starting to become rules because chat GBT is getting so big. Now there's like, you have to put a disclaimer. You know, I'm using an automated voice or whatever the hell it is, chat GBT. - So do you have the downloader? Or do you just go to chat GBT.com? - Yeah, I actually upgraded to the Plus. - Do you have to pay for it? - Well, it's free, and then I kept using it so much and said I gotta pay, it's like 20 bucks. - Okay. - And come up. But it says it's not, okay, ownership structure is complicated, and it's not publicly traded. So you can't buy shares of the company, but Microsoft is the largest investor, owning half the company. - Do those technology companies got money? - Oh, yeah. - This house is in LA, and that's all, who owns it? Oh, Dell. - Yeah. - Got a little bit of Apple. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Thanks for teaching us that, Brett. Thank you. - Oh, and what kind of, like the media seems like, they try to scare you from using it, but you need to use that. - You wanna lean into that? - Use it to your advantage. - Okay. - Yeah. - Wanna bring that into your lean forward? - Oh, I can talk about something else. - Okay. - Hit it. Hit it. Hit that shit. (laughing) (upbeat music) - So the other day I was riding my bike, and I looked up, it was nighttime, and there was like a bald eagle or something. I think it was like, probably confused when it saw me, 'cause it looked like it was gonna like swoop down on me, but then it got scary, and I was like, "Oh man, I probably do." Maybe it looked like a little baby deer or something. (laughing) So I chat GPT, what's the largest bird of prey in Nashville? And it said bald eagle, but they don't take out like golden eagles, I guess, are the ones that take out the big deers. Like you see on the mountains and shit. Oh, and then the number one question I get about my bike is, where can I charge it? And that's why I chat GPT, how do I design an app to help people find outlets nearby? - The shoot down. - Time's up. - That are a whole verified, and-- - Brett, your dad said Tom was up, lean back. - Oh, I couldn't hear it. - I love your dad. - He doesn't have his headphones on. - I don't like to. - The fact that we got Russ to record, Brett, it's your dad, times up, lean back. It is so funny. - It took 20 times up, 'cause he kept trying it. - I was gonna say the fact that it took him 20 times to get it right, though, was, you kept wanting to add-- - Make it better. - No, hey Brett, it's your daddy. (laughing) - It's Russ daddy. - And Brett's like, "Dad, stop sending daddy. It's weird." God, I love Russ. - Honestly, the outlet idea is great because when we were in South Africa and London and whatnot, dude, the plug situation was crazy. So it should just be everything about plugs that app. - Yeah, I mean, I'm surprised everybody isn't just riding around, you know, charging everywhere. - Yeah. - It's hard to find an outlet. - It's pretty crowded, yeah, exactly. - Yeah, well, was it a bald eagle? - Yeah. - 'Cause I haven't seen a bald eagle in the wild since I was a kid and I look constantly, I'm constantly looking for bald eagles and I have yet to see one. - I think it's just 'cause nighttime, they're out, you know, they can't be spotted. They're probably smart, cockroaches are smart. Yeah, they have big brains. - Yeah, you got to see one though. - Yeah. - I'm jealous. - I was a little scared. - No. - 'Cause I was like, dude, I need to hurry and get home 'cause what if like he gets his homies? - No, he's not gonna do that. - Well, after I chat, GPT does, all right. - He's not gonna stick his talons in you? - No, not at all. No, Brad, I wouldn't worry about that. - Remember talons off Laguna? - Oh, would have sat there and just stared at it. - Just take it off, Brad. - Mm-hmm. - Brad, Brad, come back, Brad. - Well, I was going pretty fast and it kinda swooped this way out and then I look up and I look back and I'm like, oh, shit. - Maybe there was food in your mustache. - Yeah. - Yeah. - And I had my lights off, so maybe two. It just couldn't see me that well. - Hold on. - 'Cause I gotta say, power. - Hold on, Brad, so it was dark? - Yeah, same time. - It could have not been a bald eagle. - No, I saw it. - Oh, okay, okay, yeah, okay. - Every time I see a bald eagle, it's just people telling me that was a bald eagle. - And yeah, when I'm by myself, I don't ever know. And how do you identify a bald eagle? - Well, it's got, it has a distinctive look. - It's bald? - It's bald. - And it had like the white, you know, up here and shit. - Yeah, it has a very distinct, like you know if it's a bald eagle. - They say it. - You know what, it might have been a large howl, but it definitely had like the white thing and I saw like, woof, woof. - They say bald, but it's got hair. - Yeah, oh, yeah. - Yes. - Yeah, yeah. - That's not receding. - Yeah. - I saw one of those down the road here. - I know. - One day and I literally pulled over and set there for five minutes, just watching it. - The raw cedar or bald eagle? - Bald eagle, it was standing up in this guys yard. It was massive. - I would have lost it. - This eagle probably stood as tall as Millie. - You got a pic of it? - Yeah. - She did, she did. - Yeah. - I got a video. - Whoa. - We had to post it. - Oh man, it was the coolest thing. I've never seen one like on the ground standing up like that. - I saw one in Lake Powell a couple years ago. - Oh, God. - I gotta go back and look for the pic. - Hey, one more time about the chat before we move on. - Oh, yeah, chat. - What kind of got me interested too is I was talking to Jacob. You know, he uses a lot. - Jacob Hube, right? From State Farm Hube. (laughing) - I thought I'd say his name, 'cause we've kind of talked about him before maybe. - Your friend Jacob. - My friend Jacob from college? - Yeah. - Hey, just friend. - That's how we always describe him. - Jacob from college. - And he uses it a lot with his job. And I was like, aren't you worried about, 'cause they say AI is gonna like eventually take over. Like Terminator, it's gonna start doing its own shit, but he's like, no, I wouldn't do that 'cause it only does what I tell it to do. I'm like, okay. So I looked into it. - I'm actually like a malfunction. - And it's very cool. Like I'm comfortable not knowing anything anymore, just 'cause I know chat GBT is straight there. - Is that on the side? - You just say malfunction. - Yeah, little malfunction. - How do you say it? - Mal. - Mal function. - Oh, it was funny. - So Brett, you just said you're okay with not knowing anything anymore. - Yeah. - This chat GI has your back. - I don't feel like I have to like-- - Study your own. - Yeah, it's just right there. - That's horrible though. - So that's what they want. - They want you to be dumb and not know things. - Yeah, but you just kind of, you just remember all the new stuff you're gonna learn. Just try to remember it. - What if it goes away and then you don't have to do nothing? - Well, you just gotta remember. Just try to remember all the knowledge you've learned, you know? - What if the internet crashes? - But don't let it stress you out. - What do you think we should be learning? - Just have fun. - Truthfully? - Yeah, like what do you think, like if you could say five things that everyone should know or learn? - How to garden, how to grow food, how to start a fire. - How would you start a fire like-- - We should mouch dig. - We should mouch dig. - We should mouch dig. - We should mouch dig. - How to start a fire, how to grow your own food, how to can food in preserved food. That's three. - How to freeze your food, how to-- - How to preserve, that goes with preserved. - Dude, I saw you tell the internet-- - I'm talking too much. - You're talking too much, sorry. - Yeah, thumbs up, it's that. - How to protect yourself, how to protect yourself, and how to, I just feel like everything, I mean, obviously the world's changed so much in the last hundred years to it. Like, people don't know how to do that anymore. I think they won't need to know how to do that, and I think that's a mistake. I think you need to know how to at least grow your basic food, hunt, do some basic stuff. - Change a tire, maybe. - Yeah, that's a good one. That's a good one, yeah. But I've dreamed of having a huge garden for years. - Oh my dude, I'm kidding. - I can't because I'm always gone, I'm always gone. And when I think of retirement in my head, truthfully, when I think of, when I retire and I'm home all the time, I want to be home all the time. I want to have a garden that I get a plentiful garden and I want to can from it, and I want to use that food, and I want to like-- - Survive. - Yes. I want to like, just sleep in, and wake up, and cook breakfast, and go sit on the porch, and just go out there and look at it. - Look at my garden, and hang up with my dogs, and watch a date line, and then cook dinner for my garden, like that's like the life. - And then cutting open a fresh garden tomato. - Oh! - Please. - With a big ass greenhouse. So it's year round. - That's my dream. - No pesticides, well a little bit. - Mushrooms everywhere. - And not only how good it is for you physically, but just mentally, emotionally, like growing your own food and being like with your garden, I know that sounds so cheesy. - Even talking to it. - Yeah, like I can't wait for the day that I have a garden. - I'm saying, that's number one goal, because the ones in my window just aren't doing it. You know, I need sections. - Yeah. - I need a dam. - Garden. - No, I need a dam. - A dam. - I need a tiller, I won't need a whole-- - Kill 'em. - I need acres. - So that's my survival kit that you talked about. - Yeah. - Great, well love you guys. Should we move on to-- - Let's do a little-- (gasping) - No! - Hey! - Hey! (laughing) - Yeah, I did not have that ready. - I didn't know about the last one. - I didn't know about the last one. - How long is it gonna take? - I actually did know that. - How long is it gonna take? - How long is it gonna take? - Probably like 15 seconds. - Okay, we'll do that until then. (laughing) - No! 13, 12, 11, 10, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one. - Moltz, Benny. - Moltz, Benny. - Moltz, Benny. - Not gonna play. - It's, it's doing a loady kurt loader. - Curt loader. - Curt loader. - Curt loader, I love that guy. - Yeah, I tried to get you to watch curt loader yesterday, but I just didn't want to. - Five, four, three, two, one. - It's like a quarter there. Yeah, cancel it, play it after, okay? - Okay. - All right, something we hate. - Guilty. - And I feel bad for saying this one, 'cause it's not a big deal, but I hate it. When I walk into a restaurant, and they have photos of food on the wall, and vegetables and fruits on the wall. - Of the actual food or just-- - No, when you walk into a restaurant and they have a giant 48 by 48 of bell peppers. - Okay, yeah, that's maybe chilies. - Chilies, apple bees, maybe. - Yeah, I text this roadhouse, maybe. - It just, I just don't like it. - Urks. - Do you wanna do something to it? - No. - Maybe paint over it. - I just always think, hey, put something else there. - Yeah, a picture of a bald eagle. - That'd be cool. - You know, like just, I don't want a picture of mushrooms. - That's true, unless it's a vintage-y, but most likely it's not. - You know what I'm talking about. - Yeah, I've seen them. - The cheesy, it kind of goes along with the live, laugh, love, vibe. - Yeah, yeah, so that's my-- - That's a good one. - That's my hate. - Okay, and I hate when places ask if you want to round up to the next dollar. - Yeah, yeah. - That's the worst. - You wanna eat my ass? - No ma'am, yeah. - I know, and that sometimes they look at you like, really, you don't wanna-- - I think people don't care, 'cause they're forced to ask. They don't give a shit whether you do it or not. - I know, sometimes though, they're like-- - Like what percentage of people you think actually do, say, out of 10? - Oh, I listen and lurk when people, you know, when I hear that question, and a lot of people say, "Sure." - Yeah, oh. - And I'm just like, "Dang, I wonder the money they're making the-- - I don't have that good at yours. - I never do. - You know, yeah, I never do. I used to though, they used to get got me back in the day with that one. - I don't get got, yeah, they used to get me, I would say, yeah, 'cause I felt like I had to, I felt pressured a little bit. - I felt pressured, so I was like, "Well, yeah." But now, today I'm like, "Bokki!" - Yeah, I'm like, "No, I need all this." - I need that, 50 cents is-- - Yeah. - I'm like, "No." - That's dumb, all money. - No thanks. - No thanks, that's a good one. - If you're a longtime listener, you know that we like to eat things that have the shrimp singing, the gut not feeling right, and sometimes a little, okay, sometimes it feels like we're gonna shit our pants. Thankfully, we have AG1 to help us get back on track and have our guts feeling good. AG1 has all non-GMO ingredients and contains no added sugar. I can swallow a lot of things, but tablets and pills is not one of them. AG1 makes it easy, and I can just toss a scoop in eight ounces of water, shake it all up, and toss it down the hatch. I like it like that. Another plus is that you don't have to bring around 57 bottles of different multivitamin. You just need your simple scoop and you are feeling great. So start with AG1 and notice the difference for yourself. It's a great first step to investing in your health, and that's why they've been a proud partner of mine for so long. Try AG1 and get a free bottle of vitamin D3K2 and five free AG1 travel packs with your first purchase at drinkagone.com/viral. That's a $48 value for free. If you go to drinkagone.com/viral, check it out. That's gumball money for baby gurus. - What about you baby gurus over there? - But he be goos. I hate, you know when you're watching a video or somebody's recording something and they like hit their phone on it. (gasps) - Yes, I hate that more than anything. I hate that. It pisses me off, it makes me cringe. - Okay. - It's the worst. - All right, that's a good one. - I'll unfollow that person because they do that. - Damn. - Because they are going like whoosh. - It's like when you're recording something and then they hit their phone or they hit their phone on something else. - Oh, we kind of do that to make fun of people. - But we do like, we go whoosh. - Oh no, not that. - But when they hit, I don't know what she's saying. You know what I'm talking about? - Yeah. - That's a good one. - Nothing pisses me off more. - Brett, what pisses you off? - I hate it when I have to poop really bad and only like a little peb comes out and it's like a lot of wipes, you know? And then I have to shit. And then I go shit 10 minutes later. - Or you leave the house and then it really hits and you gotta drop that long. - And then you get a wipe more and it just gets more raw and the clip builds up bigger. - Yeah. - I hate those ones honestly. - You're right about that. - That's the whole, the smud shit, uh-uh. - Well it's lobbing things up here. What's something we love? You guys ready for this? - I love you, love you, no. - I love a giant iced cold fountain drink. - You do love that. - You talk about that damn near air day. - You love that. - I love it. - Okay, I love when you're trying to log on to Wi-Fi and somebody shares the password with them. - Yes. - That's a good one, huh? - Or you can just share it with them. - Yes, I'm glad they made that. - Oh, I love that one. - Or they'll do like a hotspot thing. - Baby girl loves that feature. - I love that feature. - I know how the hotspot works. Sorry. - Okay, Brett. - Brett, are you okay? - He's not okay today. - Talk to the hand. - 'Cause the face-- - 'Cause the face-- - Don't give a damn. - Oh, is that, I never heard that one. - No, I've heard talk to the hand 'cause the face ain't listening. - Yeah. - What? - And then talk to the hand 'cause the face don't understand. - No, talk to the hand 'cause the face don't give a damn. - Never heard that one. - New shame. - New shame. - That's the new shame. - That's the new shame lingo. - That's somebody tricked you guys. - Yeah, that's the new shame you tall lingo. - Brett, you got tricked. (laughing) - Okay, Maggie. - Anyway. - Your love? - I love when Kevin Sploots in house. - Tom's-- - Sploots. - Kevin. - Sploots. - What is that? - Sploots, where does back legs go out? - Go straight out. - Maggie's dog. - When he does it a lot. - Maggie's dog. - When he howls, it's so cute. - Kevin. - Kevin. - Oh! - He only howls when he gets really excited and when he sees somebody. - Yeah. - He does. - That makes me feel good now that you said that. - Well, maybe he can't see us. - Kevin, come here. - Kevin, can you see us? - I can't. - I know you can't. - All the babies are just here sleeping and walking around. He's not coming. - Okay, that's good one, Brad. What do you love? - Kevin. - I love Shaq licious. - This is not an ad for Shaq. This is not an ad. - I want you guys to try one. - Okay. - Okay. - Is it Shaq? - Yeah, who's Shaq? - It's a kill-a-nail. - It's a kill-a-nail. - Yeah. - It's his candy? - Yeah. - It just came out or something. I saw him in the show. - It's kind of space on it. - They've been out for a couple months. Check them out. They're big suckers. - What? - Shaq licious. - Oh my God. - Packed with red 40 in the blue. - Brad, read the, let me read the package. - Number one ingredient is sugar. - Well, wonderful. - Oh, they're good. - They are pretty smashing. Shaq licious, exhale gummy. - Hey, is it egg, Shaq-a? - Hey, Brad. - Ex-ale gummy. It says Shaq licious. - I didn't even know there's an egg. - Brad, get in your mics, sit down. - Oh, Shaq licious. - Hey, Brad, sit down, get in front of my hand. - He's scary. - No, you're freaking out. - He's scary. - He's scary in me. - Oh, sorry. I need to chat GPT, what it says. - Can I read this? - Absolutely. - Right. - Cut my mind. - I'm cutting it. - It's your dad. - I need to be cut. - Wait, don't mess with no buttons. - Yeah, Maggie, you won't be able to recover. - No, we're good. - No, we're good. - Okay. - Is everybody ready for me to read the package? - Yeah. - Jesus Christ. - Shaq licious, exhale gummies. Peach, berry punch, and orange. - I'm sorry, you didn't-- - I see, I saw two. - I saw two. - That's what it says, playa. - I don't want Shaq to lie. - Hey, what is sometimes do snacks? - It's just, I'm sorry, but it's a space. - I know. - It's a space. - I didn't even notice. - This is genius. - They're so good. - If I saw that candy bag at the store, I would not ever buy that or pick it up. What made you buy that? - It was on the end of the aisle where it says pick this up. It's Shaq licious. - Got his ass. - You got got it. - So Brett said that him and this girl, the-- - I didn't say girl. - Okay, Brett said him and the cashier. - Person. - Freaking. - Good. - Well, she asked if it was a girl, and I was like, does that matter? Anyway. - Brett, you gotta lay the fuck back, brother. - 'Cause he's telling a damn story, and I'm like, K, he not really wants to tell it, but-- - No, go ahead. - So he picks us up at the line, and I guess the cashier, he says, do you want to try one with me? - No, they thought I stole it at first. - Oh yeah, they thought he stole it 'cause I guess he didn't ring up Shaq licious. And they say, oh, it happens a lot, and Brett goes, oh, you want to, I'm going to open it up right now. I want to try Shaq licious with me, and so they open it up, and we're just eating it right there, I guess, but-- - Gotta shake up the monotony. - I don't know what that means, but okay. - That's the normalness, I think that's what I mean. - Sometimes my armpits smell like taco seasoning, and not everybody loves tacos. Thankfully, I have Lumi Deodorant. Lumi delivers outrageous 72-hour odor control everywhere from your pits to your feet, to your ski, and even your privates. What I love is that it's baking soda free, paraben free, pH balance for safe use below the undercarriage. Choose from a variety of fresh, bright scents, like lean tangerine, lavender, sage, or toasted coconut. I personally get the unscented, but that's just me. Lumi's starter pack is perfect for new customers. It comes with a solid, stick deodorant, cream tube deodorant, two free products of your choice, like mini body wash and deodorant wipes, and free shipping. As a special offer for listeners, new customers get 15% off all Lumi products with our exclusive code. And if you combine the 15% off with the already discounted starter pack, that equals over 40% off their starter pack. Use code viralpod for 15% off your first purchase at lumideodorant.com. That's code viralpod@lumadodorant.com. Imagine Brad eating a shackle-licious with somebody just in there going like, "Mm." - Yeah, imagine that motherfucker out there coming through your line going, "Hey, you wanna try?" - I know. - A shackle-licious. - I know. - Yeah. - Kinda shackle-licious, dude. (laughing) - I didn't even know his face was on it. That's so funny. - That's not gonna be. - You didn't know his face was on there. - No, it was so good. I just eat him. - Damn. How much was that big badge? - Four, 68 signs. - I said, "What did the person say?" - They didn't say it, they're just like, "Mm, pretty good." - Yeah. - Oh, how would you describe 'em before I say? - They're very good. Just gummy, but not sticky gummy. Like a good gummy. They were good, yeah. Really good. - Want to try another flavor? - Nah. - Paige, you wanna describe before I tell you what I think. - It tastes like? - I like 'em. - What if Brett pranks us and he's like, "Those are my come gelatin." - Those are my comies. - My comies. - So, Brett, what do you think about 'em? - Sweetest fish texture, but a little more gooey than that. - Yeah, that's exactly what I think. And then like a little mochi vibe. - I can see that. Little powdery. - Potato dumpling. - I'm catching the blue one to taste like blue Kool-Aid. - I bet sales are just gonna go through the roof. - Hey, shag. - Hey, maybe we should just leave this part of the episode out and say if you wanna hear about this candy, then we're gonna see if they're gonna sponsor us or something. - That's fine, yeah. - No, those were great. Thank you for sharing, Brett. I appreciate that. - Yeah, Brett. - Oh, and I also love Miller Lite. - No, not today. - Not today. - Don't put that on. - You can't be drinking at work, Brett. - Brett, you're drinking at work. I'm calling HR. - Put it up. - I just cracked it. - I get sassy. - He does get sassy when he's drinking. - Oh, don't see us sassy. - Oh, he gets sassy. - Then pan away. - Then pan away. - Pan away. - Or, you know, change cameras, angles. - I'm done. - We don't want him having a beer on YouTube. Brett tries everything he can, get his demonetized. - He got it. - He's shaking while he's drinking that. - Dude, it's not even noon. - It's not even noon, Brett. - I'm so done. - I can't wait to drink on stage. - Next time, pour that in a solo cup. - I'm at, I'm letting this ass road beef will be, Maggie Road being footage. - Hey, sugar booger. I'm just giving you all a call, telling you all about a little story I had not too long ago. I, of course, swine, beer at airlines, back to Orlando from New York City with my boyfriend from hell. Sitting there, minding my own business, extra lake space in the security line. Of course, I nodded my head. Yes, I'll save these people if needed. I'm turning on the Elvis movie on my phone for a quick two hour flight and the world ugliest flight attendant sits across from me facing me, offers me something to prop my phone up. I gladly say yes, didn't take the hint. He hands me his phone. Next thing I know, this little bastard invited me to an all male, all leather, gay orgy. - I said, "Mick, squeeze me, bitch." - I know you're not talking to me like this, so I applied that phone back, I called corporate. I said, "Ma'am, I'm getting my attorneys involved. "What I end up with, $100 credit." Okay, love ya, girls, bye. - Bro, that would be my luck if I'm a flight attendant and I invite someone to an orgy, they call corporate on my ass. - The one person. - The one person I invite calls corporate on my ass. - Yeah, hey, a hundred bucks, but dang, dude, you gotta be careful who you're talking to. - Yeah, what vibes did, why did this guy think it was okay to invite you to an all male, all leather, all gay orgy? Which sounds fun, by the way. - I mean, come on, listen to the call, he was sassy as hell. He was like, "This guy loves a good orgy, "excuse me, bitch, he's on there." He's like, "This guy's a good time." - Damn, you should've went. - At least just check it out and watch. - It sounds fun, I would've went. - Maybe he needed the $100 voucher more than the orgy. - Listen, I know that a lot of people will be like, "That's inappropriate, I get that." I understand that, but my God, if someone came up to me and invited me to something like that, I would be like, "Thank you for inviting me." - I'd say, "Can I put that on my Snapchat?" - I go, "Can't get you on my Snapchat." Say it again, say it again, say it again. - I think that's great. I'm glad you called corporate though, get your $100. - What do you even say like, God? - That was-- - That guy got fired, right? You think? - I doubt it. - Okay. - Spirit airlines. - Yeah. - The flight attendant offered me to an orgy, I'm calling my lawyers, that I called up, will give you $100 voucher. - Yeah. - Okay. - It kind of seems like a hater to me. - Yeah. - Sorry. - Is it a hater or a go get it? - By calling them a corporate, yeah. - I wonder-- - You don't want to get anybody involved in anything. - Well, I wonder why-- - That's the first one. - I wonder why the orgy is all leather. - I know, maybe it's just the kink of the week. - A theme. - A costume. - Yeah. - A white party. - Okay. - Weather party. - Okay. - Ooh, we should do maybe feather, like fake leather. - Oh. - Fake leather party. - And like, or like food. - Oh yeah, that's what this is. - Yeah. - Foodsy, everyone knows fake Gucci. - To what? - A Gucci party. (laughing) - We should have a Gucci party. - We should have a Gucci party. - Do you remember the party idea we've had for years and we haven't done it yet? - Yeah, top tier tang. - No, that, but what else? - Oh, to fart on my-- - No, to fart that, but what else? - To fart or to queef. - We've-- - We've had a lot of times. - We've taught this for five years. We want to have a party where we all come dressed as Dr. Phil and Dr. Phil is playing on the TV. - Okay. - I guess we skipped over that one. - Yeah, I don't remember this. Years ago, I remember y'all saying something about it. - Really? Was that-- - Was it recorded? - May, may be. - May, may be. - To fart? - Yeah. All right, well thank you for calling in, honey. - Yeah, I love you. Thank you. - I hope your next flight goes better. - Yeah. - Oh yeah. - So I just left a message. I'm not sure if it actually went through, but anyways, sitting here, Friday night, with my dog, and I'm stoned, I had myself a little sandwich party. When you guys have your sandwich parties, what do you put on your sandwich? Mine right now is Wonder Bread, the white bread, the cheap shit. May all one side, miracle up on the other, not toasted. Swiss cheese, double that bitch up. Oh, on me, heel, turkey, lettuce, tomato from my garden, and tons of salt and pepper. What do you guys have on your sandwich party? - Mummy turkey, baby. - Mummy turkey, baby. - You gotta have the salt and pepper on a sandwich. - You have to. - First, can I just say, I'm loving that you guys are calling it a sandwich party too, because I started doing that because having sandwiches for dinner is always looked down upon. It's always looked down upon as the poor man's dinner, or, oh, I'm lazy, I didn't cook a gourmet meal, we're just having sandwiches. It's not just sandwiches. Sandwiches are superior. Sandwiches are amazing. And you don't need to just have a boring sandwich for dinner. Make it a sandwich party. - Sandwiches swap at any time of the day. Lay out your meats, lay out your, your mayonnaise. Later if everybody come and make a sandwich, have a sandwich party. - I love a good crisp lettuce. - Yeah. - I love a spicy mustard or like a dijon. That's the way I go, that route. I love some, you probably don't like this, but I like some sprouts sometimes. - Mm-hmm. - What else you put on there? Good tomato, like she said. - Garden if possible. Pickles sometimes. And some jalapenos even, some avocado. - You're going all out. - I do more veggie sandwich, but what do you do? - I like, I almost keep mine the same almost every time. I love a good, I like a, this bores head has teriyaki chicken that I love. I'll do a chicken or even a turkey, not a ham fan. - No. - Now I will do a grilled ham and cheese, but that's rare. - I'm having a cold sandwich, turkey. - On even on Thanksgiving like that have. - I'll have a little bit of, I'm not a ham lover. - Okay. - I'll do ham, I'll do, sorry, turkey, cheese, lettuce, tomato, tomato cut thin. - Sorry, did you say what cheese or you don't care? - I'm not picky, I'll whatever, yeah. And then I'll do either mayonnaise or miracle whip, lots of salt and pepper, boom. - God have salt and pepper. - Oh. - Got it. A sandwich. - I like my bread lightly toasted the little toast. - Oh and it has to be potato bread. I don't do the wheat bread, I don't do the nut bread. It has to be potato bread. - Is it country potato bread or something? - Yeah. - Yeah. - Now you're saying, huh? - Pretty much the same, the only thing different I would say is I like a little bit of meat. I'll do a thin little slice of turkey and then pack on all the other stuff. - We love a sandwich party. - I feel like a lot of people don't use that much deli meat. Is it a texture thing if you have too many layers? - If I get deli meat, I get it shredded. - Shredded. - Shredded. - Shredded. - I have to have it shredded or very, very thin. - Very thin. - Like paper thin. - I don't like a ton of meat on there. I won't put like three, four, five slices. It'll be like one, maybe two. - And that just does it for you. - Yeah, yeah, I don't like a lot of meat. But I love a sandwich party. Sometimes I'll switch it up and make another different sandwich, but that's my go to, and I love having 'em. - Dang, we just love eatin' honestly. - Yeah, and it's really handy if you got people over stand. You just put everything out. - Sandwich party. - And you're like, there's lunch. - Sandwich party. - Sandwich party, so. Yeah, hey guys, keep having sandwich parties. - It makes everyone happy. - Yeah, absolutely, thank you for callin' in. - Hi honey, new listeners here. You know, up cream pies, girls. But you know, I've got this thing where I was doing birth control and a honey. My husband was my boyfriend at the time, and I have a, it's a fetish at this point for a cream pie. And then I have a go off birth control, due to some medical stuff. And so he couldn't come in me and it was this thing where mentally, and I was having a hard time getting off because it wasn't as exciting 'cause when I get my like, mentally, it's like a reward. You know what I mean? And so, now he got sniffed, thank the Lord, thank the universe, think whatever, whoever you think. He finally got sniffed. And I tell you what, ladies, I can't, when I know I'm gettin' that cream pie, I can't get off until I get it. It is a whole thing, no matter what toy is involved, it doesn't matter what, nothing. If I know I'm gettin' it, I can't until I get it. You know what I'm sayin'? And he could be goin' soft in me after he came, but no one I got that cream pie, I will always get off. Am I alone in this? Please tell me I'm not alone. Okay, see? This lady loves cum. She loves it. This lady loves cum. I should've saved this lady for my love. She lives and dies for the cream pies. Loves a cream pie, oh. Loves jizz in her. Craves cum. Craves cum. Wes Craven. Oh, wow, soul. I don't think you're alone. Even a little soft noodle dick. She just wants to cum. Yeah, after the bus, she said, "It's fine if it gets all soft." So, I don't think you're alone. I don't love it. I don't hate it. I don't think about it either way, but I don't think you're alone. I think a lot of people love cum. Oh. And I love cum in 'em. Oh, yeah. You love cum in you? That's, you didn't hear anything I just said. You said a lot of the people. Getting it on you, yeah. I don't hate it, but I don't love it. I don't-- I don't hope for it to just stay in me, and I have to start babysitting. You guys should like it. I'll drop it off quick. Well, Brett, what are you trying to say? These are kind of cum planers. Brett, are we complaining? About the cum. Well, we're in good company. So, I always feel like we can come playing. Yeah, Brett. You guys should have said you hate cum. I don't hate cum. But do you love cum? Brett, you need to learn how to communicate. Yeah, Brett, communicate better. Come on. Come on. Come on, come on, man. Come on. Come on, man. So, the cum, I mean, yeah, I don't live or die for it. I could go either way, but maybe it's a satisfaction thing for girls, you know, like I made him cum. Yeah. So, it could maybe-- And I feel like a lot of people love the idea of them being cum dumpsters and I'm being serious. Oh, yeah. They love that. It's a thing. You're not alone, it's a thing. It holds a special place in the policy. Yeah, like, ooh, cum in me. Ooh, cum in me, Daddy. Especially if you want to have their kid, I mean, come on. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So, I don't think you're alone. I think you have a thing and stick with it. That's fine. Is this making you bust nuts? And he didn't have to pull out and cum in a whatever. If he has a hole to come in, great on both of you. He's loving love. Yeah. Yeah, I know. Yeah. And then that's fine. But I guess some men love coming on faces. Some men love coming on tits, you know? Isn't it weird that people have a different preference on what they love to come on? Yeah. I'm kind of like her, too, in a way, I guess, because I can't come until someone else comes. Really? Yeah. [LAUGHS] That sucks. I'm 100%. So if Paige doesn't cum, you can't cum? Oh, no, I'll still cum if she doesn't want to. But if I know she wants to, then I'll hold out. I mean, he slipped up a couple times, you know? You've slipped up, bro. Come on, bro. He's talked about it on this podcast. The rock fuckers will find it. I mean, I might have been lion. Just to have Lionel Richie. Because I know it seems unreal. Hey, start calling Brett Lionel Richie. Lionel Richie and Victor. And Victor. We can never forget about Victor. Oh, no. That's Victor right there. That's Victor. Victor Bone. Victor Bone. I love Victorville. You need to move there. Yeah, you should move there. I should move Victorville, babe. Brett. You need to move to-- You need to move to Victorville. You need to fit right in. Brett, change your name to Victor. What if Brett moved to Victorville because of the fucking mayor? Oh, my. He's the mayor of Victorville. Titty City. Brett, go be the mayor of Victorville. I'm looking at you. How long it's going to take me to get there? We call Brett Victor because he always plays the victim. Uh-huh. Victor. Victor. OK, Vicki. No. He tried to pull that one on there. I said no. Any name I come up with him for him, he tries to do a little switch and get me back. And says Vicki. I have a comment for every comment. OK. It's always tit for tat. Yeah, tit for tat. With pro quo. That's what you live for, huh? Put that in. We'll search it and see what comes up. Yeah, put that in chatty. It means tit for tat. Yeah. All right, well, thank you. OK, before we move on, sorry. I saw on the news the other day that they're changing the Cumberland Park name. To what? I don't know. I think like plazas, no. But I think it's because it has come in it. Maybe people are coming there. Maybe there's too much come in the river. Too much come in the river and too many people come playing in. Lots of compliners. Wow. Well, thanks for calling in and telling us how much you crave calm and love it because a lot of people will relate to love you. Oh, yeah. Hey, honey, would you rather get rid of your favorite fast food or get rid of your favorite fancy restaurant? OK, bye. Ooh. Would we rather get rid of our favorite fast food or our favorite fancy restaurant? Damn, that's hard. Think about it. All right, no. What's our favorite fancy restaurant? Dintai. Dintai. OK, yeah. It's not that fancy, but it kind of is. Yeah. It's a nice place. Yeah. Oh, I don't think I can get rid of it. I can't get rid of it either. Because if I don't-- fast food, I can go somewhere else. Mm-hmm. It all tastes the same. It does. I can go somewhere else. I'm not getting rid of my soup dumplings and my green beans from Dintai fun. I'm not doing it. We are Dintai guys. So that's it. That's George your answer. I'd rather get rid of the fast food because I'm not getting rid of Dintai. Dintai never disappoints. And they just opened one in New York City and we have a show coming up and I'm going to make an appointment. Mm-hmm. And-- We're stoked about it. --page was like, it's only an hour and a half flight. I'll go up to Dintai and spend the night to eat there and I'll do it too. Oh, dude. I wasn't-- I knew you'd be there. So-- Who else is going to go? Right. So that's good. That's good for us. That's real good for us. Go just straight to Dintai to the hotel probably. Oh, man. I've never really got a lot to do in New York. New York. I just walked down the main way quick. What's the main-- what's it called? Time. Time's way. Time's way. Yeah. Yeah. A little chunk of Times Square with Lola and Tina. Yeah. But I would like to maybe go back and kind of look at it. Let's go. Let's go for a couple days. Dintai as much as we can and go on a little food tour of New York. Yeah. If you're from New York, leave us a little note. Yeah. Where should we eat in New York City? And come to our show in New York City. Ew. Come on. Pull up. Yeah. Thank you for calling in, honey's. Love you. Hey, honey. It's Mom. Dick's here. Oh, shit. I just got done watching the episode where Greg rudely interrupted the pod and brought somebody into the garage. And you guys made jokes about what if they were going in there to fuck? Well, that reminded me of a story. My boyfriend at the time wasn't in bed when I woke up in the middle of the night. So I went looking for him, went in the bathroom, went in the living room. He wasn't anywhere to be found. And he was a motorhead, so I figured that he might be in the garage working on something. So I got in the garage and, well, he wasn't working on something. No, he was being worked on. And he was getting fucked in the ass by the old guy. Also, he found him off Craigslist, so that was fun to walk into. And I ended up making him shower and getting back in bed with him. So there's some trauma for you guys. I just thought that that was funny. And I love you guys. And I can't wait to see you on tour. Bye. Thank you, honey. Thank you for coming to a show and thank you for calling in. I'm in disbelief. Dude, and just saying shower that come off your ass and hop back in bed. What would y'all do if y'all found? I would say, what you doing out here? I wouldn't just shower them up and send them back to bed. I'd be like, okay. So you like talking your ass. So let's not let it know about you. Yeah. That's. Yeah. Now I know. So where do we go from here? I'm so stoked and I've always joked to Greg about this. He loves cars so much that I said, one day I'm going to walk out here and you're going to be fucking your muffler. Yeah. That's all that on string or my strange addictions. Yes. Yeah. Um, I don't know. I'm sorry that you had to see that that guy fucking your husband from Craigslist. Dude, I missed the casual encounters. Do you remember those? Yes. I used to do casual encounter reads as Tammy. And they almost deleted my Facebook because of it. So I haven't done them in years, but they were the funniest fucking things. Craigslist used to have casual encounters and people would go on there and put ads in for sex. That's what I'm looking for. This is what I want where can we meet top thing and reading them was so funny. One time I got on there and I read this guy was like, I'm looking for someone to come over. I don't want to talk to you. I don't want to know your name. I don't want to know how old you are. I don't want to know what you look like. Come into my house, go upstairs, first bedroom on the left. I will be bent over and lubed up with a sheet over my body where you can just see my asshole. Come fuck me and leave a Holy ghost. Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Like stuff like that. Wow. So they knew what they wanted and I always hope that happened for him. They had a vision. I bet it did. We should. People were on there. We should just reenact all of those stories. Oh my. Like so even the caller, you know, we go in and it's Greg getting fucked in the ass by an old guy, like just reenact people's stories for them. Yeah. But they probably don't want to see that again because it is traumatized. She doesn't want to see it. She doesn't want to see that. But casual encounters from Craigslist used to be just hidden. Wild and hidden. Do they still have that on there? No, I think they got rid of it. It was too dangerous. I think, you know, because now there's all the dating apps to that they want to send them to naturally got a got a catalyst over to the other app. Right. Those casual encounters. Oh, I'm looking it up here. So they still have casual encounters or they got got it back or something. You got to start reading it. You guys make that a segment. Start reading them. See, you know, people probably found out a way that we should start doing that for real instead of letters to paint house too. Doesn't. There's some good one. First one right here. Woman for woman does mold turn you on a moldy pussy. You mean like, do you want me to read this? Yeah. Like black mold. Now I'm scared to read it because I've never read it before, but this is weird. Do you like to get down and dirty around decay? Do you want to fuck among some fungi? The title says it all. I'm just a cold babe living in a moldy bedroom looking for a lady. The jury's out on whether or not this musty love nest might be hazardous. But what's the fun in doing something without a little danger? The mattress isn't directly on the carpet. So while you won't be man handling the mildew, you'll still be having sex while swimming in spores. You bring a jacket, I'll make a mixed tape. I'm hot to try it and surrounded by rot. Whoa. So he wants some black mold. She no woman for woman. Oh woman. Okay. Uh, maybe that's not even safe. Fulfill my waffle house fantasy. Oh, we've opened up a can. A can of blue waffles. Oh my God. I'm happy right now. Yeah. I mean, read this in the next few episodes because this one's kind of long and I want to read it before I read. The way you read those. You like it. It is amazing. Thank you. Yeah. It's really good. Dang dude. I feel like I'm listening to like an audiobook. Mm hmm. And it's about blue waffles and stuff. So good. Chutchi. Thank you. Damn dude. People. I love reading that stuff. People like to just dabble in death though. That was a little wild. That was right off the bat. I've never heard anything like that. You want to do that and in room full of filth and mold and sports for a second, I was like, is it did Brett right? That's what I'm saying. Where'd she get all those spores in her bedroom, Brad? Where'd she get? Where'd she get the spores? I do. Stop. He's shaking. Cause he's trying to hold weed in. Maybe she had rice. Oh my God. Stop shaking. That's how much of a not a narcissist I try not to go do. He was going, Hey, Brett, stop, go work at Shake Shack. Wow. Thank you for calling in, honey's love you Brett, give her the vape. Hey honey. Love y'all so much. I've been listening to day one and I'll forever listen. I just call one calling today just to maybe sense because I don't want to vent to my family. Oh, hold the service. Hold on. It's okay. It's like husband because they're so proud of me, but I finally got a job after two years of looking and I could be myself at this job and it's celebrated to be myself. It's kind of ideal perfect and today was my first day and I have to leave my child and I am struggling with that and I already have anxiety, but just leave my daughter. It's hard and I'm really happy that I have a job and I won't be stretching that much over money, but I just maybe you I look up to y'all so much. Maybe, you know, words of inspiration we really help for right now. I'm very grateful. I really it's so grateful, but it's just really hard to leave and I love you so much. Oh, yeah, honey's love y'all. We love you. A lot of parents and struggle with that, you know, when you first leave your kid, you just spent the last couple years just nurturing them and being there for them. It's daily every day. It's scary to just leave your kid with either a random person or fricking, even a family member. Even these daycares, man, I get sad when I leave the dogs for the day. I can't imagine, you know, so an actual human. Yeah, I could not feel like a lot of people feel this way. You're not alone in it and and I also feel like you may be thinking you feel guilty for feeling that way because you're happy. You got it. You can feel both. Way to be happy. You got a job to be excited and then to also feel sad in a way. That's fine. All the mixed emotions are how long do you think she can feel sad for? I don't know. But that's what I was going to say. I think it I think it'll get easier for sure. That was your first day. I think it'll get easier. Change is hard. Yeah. Change is real hard. Yeah. Frick, man, for sure, life's scary out there, you know, don't want to be like, say negative shit, but it is a scary world. So it I can see like, damn, even thinking about having a kid for me is scary, right? But you got this. Yeah. You got this. And you know what, what you're just, I don't know, I feel like this is a common thing and you shouldn't feel bad for, for filling this way and, and I'm happy that you called into vent, honey's. Give it a couple. Yeah. Give it a couple months. You'll start getting into a new routine and filling yourself and loving, loving it. Absolutely. It will all work out for sure. It will. You got this. Keep up the good work and congratulations on the new job. Woo hoo. Love you. This is the last call. And very cool that, like you mentioned, she's able to call in and vent, I think it's big. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Dude. We'll text Vaughn, baby. Hey, Vince Monas. Yeah. You know what I mean? Absolutely. We love you. And Shred. Shred. Hey, I was just wondering what time do you think you'll be coming over for dinner this evening? Just give me a call, let me know, and I appreciate it. Oh, yeah. Okay. Well, have a good night. Is that the little mermaid? Damn. Hey, if he's cooking, I'll be over. That's what I'm gonna say. I will. Do you tell me? I'll tell me. Yeah. You tell me what time do you wear? I'll be there. It's time and place, baby boy. We will pull up. By neighbors who are in their 80s, the one guy comes over. We met kind of in between our yards and he goes, we're always seeing you cook all that food on Facebook. And I said, let me know when you want to play. I'll bring a plate over. Cute. And you probably always have extra. Yeah. Oh, and you're cooking. Dang. Do you have you as a neighbor? Yeah. The fact that he watches your stuff. I know. Dead. I know. Who told him? Did they just know? I'm messaging on Facebook before we moved in. Oh, wow. Word spread. And he said, hey, buy that most dick from the street. Yeah. There are some super spreaders here in Nashville. Can she? So, hey, tell me what time dinner is, brother, I'll be there. Dang, could you imagine people just calling and saying, hey, come over for dinner? And we showed up. Yeah. If I don't got to cook or clean, I'll come eat. Yeah. I'll come eat. I'll help clean up a little. I ain't helping. Sorry. Dang. I love that though. I know. Maggie's always the best. If I cook Maggie cleans, you know, and she's always coming up. But if somebody invites me and I don't have to, I'm not going to do it. Yeah. Can you serve us on some paper planes? Yeah. If I invite people over, I'm not having them clean. Right. Yeah. Even if I go to dinner at somebody's, I'm offering to help, and I don't mind helping. And yeah. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. At least. And hopefully they'll say no. Right. Yeah. Hopefully they'll say no. Bro. No, I got this. You sit down. You sit down. Yeah. Yeah. There's nothing worse than somebody saying, hey, can I ask you a favor? It's like, oh, yeah. What is it? Yeah. Cause you don't know. I know when they, you don't know that favor. Just ask the favor instead of saying, hey, can I, you know what I can't say? Hey, can I ask you a question? Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Ask it. You said that to Greg. Yeah. I said, can I ask you a question to Greg? Yeah. I don't ever remember that. What about, what was the question? That threw you in the car? I don't remember. It was just like yesterday or something the day before. You go, let me ask, or maybe you said, let me ask you something. See, I feel like that's different. It is. Maybe that's a sale. I'm telling you, I'm about to ask you a question. Yeah. I'm not saying, can I ask you a question? But when you did that, I was like, Chelsea hates that. Oh. Well, here's, here's why. And I mostly hated online. And here's why. Yeah. Someone will message me. This happens all the time. And now it's going to happen even more when I say it. Well, we've said it on here. Have we? Well, I think it's Scammers, isn't it? No. Someone will say, hey, can I ask you a question? And I'm always like, yeah, ask it. But now that I've replied to it, your message is going to get lost in the hundreds or thousands. Yeah. So you're not going to get to ask that question. No, I'm not going to see it. You just sent it to general. Yeah. And then you're, you're lost with all the other messages. Right. So it's, you lost your chance. So just ask. Now I'm not going to see your message. Yeah. But while we kept getting all those messages, what are you talking about? Do you all remember when we were getting all those? Can I ask you a question? Probably. Yeah. We were talking about it. Yeah. Okay. I didn't put two and two together until now. That's funny. Sometimes they'll be getting us. Yeah. I was like, why am I getting all these messages saying that? Every time I talk about something that annoys me on the pod, people do it to me. Oh, yeah. Just a fuck with me. Oh, I've noticed there. I did a thing. Uh-huh. Everywhere. Yeah, which is funny, but then the comments will be like, oh, they're not about like, and then we'll do it more. Yeah. Yeah. So we all just kind of play our own games. If you don't like something we do and you tell us, okay, yeah, guess who's going to do it more? Um-hmm. Us. Us. Us. And them, apparently. Most Kicks! Mm-hmm. Most Kicks. Oh, most Kicks stuck. But good. We went to the lake a few weeks ago. Oh, yeah. There was just like 70-year-old man out there walking around and we were going, "Oh, sticky, my leaky." Same. Camille. Camille. Camille. And he goes, "I don't know what y'all are saying, but I got to go," and he like jumped off a cliff to get away from us. I said, "Hey, you see me mulch sticks down there at the end of the canal," or whatever and he goes, "I don't know what you're saying," and then he goes, "But I am old." But I am old. Yeah. And he covered his ears and did some dive in the lake. And jumped off the cliff. Trying to get away. I don't know what you're saying, man. I don't know what you're saying, but have a good day. That's what he said. Dude, can you imagine? It's so funny. It's a group of people on the boat just for saying, "Money, money, money, ding-ee, money, ding-ee." He's the being a movie. Like, get me out of here. Seven cents. He's probably like, "I shouldn't turn that corner and came down here." No. Because damn. Brett, why don't you and your dad work on the seventh sense? All right. Start writing a movie script. Okay. The seventh sense. Maybe chat can help you. Oh, yeah. I'll ask him. Yeah. Chat. Chat. What'd you call him? Jiboy? Jiboy? Chatty Daddy. Not our Jiboy. That's chat. Jiboy. Yeah. Chat boys. Do you want me to play love hate? Play it. We'll end it. We'll end the part on that. Love. Hey. Love. Love. Hate. Chitter. I love it. Damn. Are these Brett's beats? He's trying to get out. Oh, is it still going? Yeah. What do you think is playing? I have my headphones on. My phone. We're playing some freakin. Miss some Halloween shit. Yeah. I don't mean I don't want a self promoter or anything. Hey, that was good. That was crazy. I thought. I thought. I felt like I was running into a Travis Scott concert. Yeah. It's a cruise horn. Don't play it. Well, I want to hear it when it's complete and finished. Yeah. No, it is. Should we listen? I don't even know what's on it. It's for his trailer for... Okay. Well, maybe we should tell people... Right, turn it off. Maybe we should end it with that and just tell people first or we'll just tell them right now while it's going. Tell them what? The number and all that they need to tell us. I'll play this while you say the number and stuff. Hold on. They don't know it. Okay, play it. Please come see us at the Viral Podcast Live, New York, Boston, Philly, Chicago. The Viral Podcast.co. Get your tickets. And new merch drops every month at the Viral Podcast.co, not calm. Yeah, we hit good for them. And no, and not calm either. Yeah, calm. Co. So I love you guys and we're going to lead me out with a... Always remember that you are doing great. You're looking good. And fuck what everybody else thinks. Thanks. This is creepy. Right in time for... This is the Bloorman trailer. On the baby girl's getting ready. All right, great. That's Brett. That's good. Brett, hit it. We're good.
