Phone Taps
Lazy Boyfriend is Causing Trouble at Home
There's only one feeling like knowing your banker personally, like growing up with a bank you can count on, like being sure what you've earned is safe, secure, and local. There's only one feeling like knowing you're supporting your community. You deserve more from a bank. You deserve an institution that stood strong for generations. Bank of Colorado, there's only one member FDIC. Don't answer the phone, Elvis Duran, the Elvis Duran phone tap. Garret, what did you do? Well, Jake is playing a phone tap on his girlfriend, Katie. Jake's been at home, he's been out of a job, so he's kind of been going stir crazy just sitting around the house while he looks for a job. So he thought why not phone tap his girlfriend, Katie, saying, you know, letting her know how he's been keeping busy. And I'm sure she's probably impatient with him not working. Well, yeah, that and the fact that what he's about to tell her what he's been doing. All right, we'll see. I'm assuming some stuff here. Let's just listen to it. Yeah. All right, Garret went in to get a phone tap. Let's see what happens. Hello. Hey, how's your day? It's fine. How are you? Pretty good. There's a little problem. Well, that your cocktail address, I shrank pretty bad. Like a cocktail dress? What do you mean you shrank it a little bit? Like it went from a size that would fit you to a size that would only fit like a five-year-old. What? Yeah. I'll have to wear it just tomorrow. Yeah, you're not going to be able to because it's a dryer. Is it dry already? No, I dried it over the fire because I thought it would pick a nice wood smell. Oh my God. Why are you doing laundry? Well, I never do laundry. This is why I do laundry because you don't know how to do laundry. Well, I thought I would just throw it in with my other dirty clothes that had paint all over them. Why was there paint on your clothes? Well, I mean, you know, as we talked about, I wanted to have a vacation, so I thought I would just get a head start. What? Yeah, so I started painting the cabinets in the ceiling. You painted the cabinets in the ceiling of the kitchen. Most of the ceiling. I got some of the paint on the floor and then I tracked it around the house a little bit. What color did you paint it? Well, maroon for the feeling and then an excuse for the cabinets. Okay. And I thought, I would do that without talking to me first. But why would you? Why would you paint our kitchen without talking to me first? Well, we didn't even we didn't even agree on a color. Yeah, we can always just repaint it. You know, this is the type of thing you need to talk to me about before you do in our apartment. Maroon on the ceiling. It's very soothing. Are you painting the cabinets and the ceiling in our apartment? Why are you doing laundry? And why are you putting my dress in with your painting clothes? You knew I had to wear that dress tomorrow. What is your problem? You need to get out of the house and they're doing something, Jake. Stop doing things inside the house. I don't have time for this. What are those? You can't make a decision like that without painting. I thought that, you know, if I make a small decision, it will lead to a bigger decision. A bigger decision like getting a job. What were you having to decide about that? Is that something you could be doing during this time instead of painting the ceiling and washing my cocktail dress? Hold on, baby. The dryer is coming off the wall a little bit. It looks like I should have put all those tennis shoes in with whatever that she is. Jeez! Stop doing things. Stop doing things throughout the house. Just turn everything off and walk out of the house and go apply for a job. I'm so sick of this. You need to get out of the house. Stop touching my things. I can't believe you did this. You need to take care of this before I get home. You need to get out of this. I am not going home to this. You need to fix the wall and you need to give me money for a new cocktail dress because I need it for tomorrow. I can't deal with you just sitting around the apartment doing this thing all day. I mean, well, I did something today. I mean, should give me some credit. I mean, maybe a cocktail apartment. What did you do today? You shrunk my cocktail dress. What else did you do today? What did you do that was at all helpful to my life? I can't sit here and talk to you about what you f*cked up in our apartment. Well, I have to work. Do you understand you need to get out of the house and go apply for a job? It didn't get a lot of time for a nap, so. Why would you take a nap? You slept until 10. You sleep until noon half the time. Well, if you were me, like, what would your priority list be? What would you try and tackle first? Talking about Jake, I'm not your f*cked assistant maker. Make the decision yourself. Figure it out. Am I on the right track there? Fix these problems. I'm serious. You are causing me so much sex. Hey, hey, Katie. Who the f*ck is this? Jake, are you have your f*cked party? No, no parties. Actually, you just got phone taps. What? Sorry, baby. Jake, how do you have time to phone tap me, but you don't have a job. I don't get it. I can't believe you, so my dress is okay. I had a second interview today, I went really well, I thought of my way home. And you do drink my dress? No, everything's fine. Oh, thank God, I gotta go. There's only one feeling like knowing your banker personally. Like growing up with a bank you can count on. Like being sure what you've earned is safe, secure, and local. There's only one feeling like knowing your supporting your community. You deserve more from a bank. You deserve an institution that stood strong for generations. Bank of Colorado, there's only one member FDIC. FDIC.
Jake's been unemployed, and decided to mess with his girlfriend by screwing up their home to keep himself busy.