Define the Qualities You Must Possess to have the people you want in your community be attracted to you when you meet them.
We’ve been discussing the empowering or disempowering capabilities of your community. We’re pretty sure this is not news to you. Most have heard all the memes, and it just makes common sense—unfortunately it’s just not commonly used.
If you haven’t seen our previous episodes on this topic, we strongly recommend you catch up on them—they lay a lot of ground work for this one.
We discussed in the last episode specific strategies for choosing your community. This cannot be haphazard, and it will not automatically include your family and friends.
In fact, if you’re building your community correctly, choosing family and friends could be incredibly disempowering.
(upbeat music) - Welcome back to our series on the importance and the impact of your community. - Hello, hello. - Hello, hello. And we've been talking about this for a couple of weeks now. And what we want to talk about specifically today is how you define the qualities and characteristics that you must possess to have the people you want in your community be attracted to you when you meet them. You know, it's not a given that your ideal community members are going to want to have you in their community unless you are the kind of person that you've defined and that they would want to be around. Hopefully that makes sense to you. - Sure. - So we've been discussing the empowering and disempowering capabilities of your community. And we're pretty sure this idea is not news to you. Most of us have heard the memes or we've read the memes. And it just kind of makes common sense. Unfortunately, common sense is not often commonly utilized. And so if you've seen our previous episodes on this topic, we strongly recommend, or if you haven't, rather, we strongly recommend that you catch up because they lay a lot of groundwork that builds up to this one. So in our last episode, we discussed specific strategies for choosing your community. And this cannot be haphazard. It has to be very strategic if you want it to be empowering for you. And here's the big kicker. It will not automatically include your family and friends. Now, why is that bearable? - Sure, well, sometimes maybe family and friends are not so nice. - That's so nice. - Or they're going in a different direction than you. - That's right. They have different values, different directions, different objectives, different goals. And so that's not going to be a good community member for you if you want to achieve what you're going after. Hopefully that makes sense to you. And quite frankly, if you're building your community correctly, choosing family and friends could be incredibly disempowering for you because they're not going to do the kinds of things we're going to talk about here in just a moment. So I know this goes and we know this goes against a common narrative. - Sure. - But it's true nonetheless. We discuss all the reasons in our previous episode. So please go back and review that. And once you've done that, here's a few questions you can ask yourself. Want to talk about seven basic questions you can ask yourself to help you define your ideal community. So the first question would be, well, I'd better say. - What qualities and characteristics do my community members have? - Right. Not my average community members, not my current community members, but my ideal community members. If I could have the community of my dreams, what qualities and characteristics do they have? - Good. Second question, what do they do and not do? Many times what they do not do is just as important as what they do. - Sure. - Third question would be what, Bruce, but? - What are their morals? - What are their morals? - Are they a moral person? - Are they moral individuals? What are their principles? - Values. - What are their values? Do they tell the truth? - Even when it's unpopular. - Even when it's unpopular or uncomfortable. Maybe even more powerfully when it's unpopular or uncomfortable. Do they tell the truth? Number seven, do they care enough? Here's a big one. Tell me what I need to hear, even if I don't like it. Or do they have a tendency to tell me what I want to hear so that I stay comfortable and they don't cause any kind of friction? Those kinds of community members are not gonna cause you to grow. - Okay. - So these are a few. Gave you an idea of a few other questions you must answer to clearly define your community, your ideal community first. And then there's a second part of this. And the second question is probably more important. And what's that question, Bruce? - Who do I have to become so that these ideal community members want me to be in their community? - That's right. That's right. If you set these high principles and morals and values for your ideal community members and you don't possess those, are they going to be attracted to you when they meet you? Probably not. And when you answer this question, you have to be brutally honest with yourself in the self-assessment. There's no value in lying to yourself. And then once you've done that, define who you have to become, then finally you put together a very solid action plan on how you must specifically change and grow to meet the criterion you've just set for your community members and for yourself. And then finally, once you have your action plan, there's a last step and what is that, Bruce? - When you get busy. - You get busy. - Get to work. - Get to work, put your action plan into action. Hopefully this is helpful to you and we appreciate you giving us a couple of moments of your day. - Thank you for being here. - God bless you. We'll see you next week. - Bye. (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music)
