TADPOG: Tyler and Dave Play Old Games
Ep. 792 - J.R.R. Tolkien's The Lord of the Rings, Vol 1 (SNES)
You're about to listen to TADPOG. Tyler and Dave play old games. It's a comedy video game podcast. We would like to stress that the host are not experts and are really just very crass commentators. Seriously, this is an explicit podcast that happens to talk about video games sometimes. So please enjoy this pretty okay podcast with Tyler and Dave. (upbeat music) - Hello, and now. - Hello. - Hello. - Welcome to another TADPOG podcast. I'm Ian, your wisdom host. Joined here by our respectable Dave. - Hi. - And on the line we have, once again, Sandrich Pope Phil Hawkins, he's joining us today. - Tyler's not here because he had to be a good dad and go to the ER. - Yeah. (laughs) - Kids, man. - I got to be a bad dad and skip out on making dinner for the family. - Hell yeah. - Hey, I made dinner for Henry before I came over. I boiled that boy up some eggs. (laughs) - Hey. - Dad style. You hungry? - It's a soup. - Hobbit lunch. - Hobbit lunch, that was second breakfast. - Yeah, what was it, 11 Z's? - 11 Z's, that's 11 Z's. So speaking of all this Hobbit talk and 11 Z's and second breakfasts, today we're covering J-R-R talkings, The Lord of the Rings, volume one for Super Nintendo. - Yeah, which I think this game has, I think it holds the record for the most punctuation marks in the video game title. - Possibly, possibly. - 'Cause there's a period between each of Tolkien's initials and there's an apostrophe. - Apostrophe, yes, a colon. - A colon. - And then another colon. - A lot. - It's a lot of punctuation. - There's gotta be some like J-R-P-G out there. There's gotta be a Dragon Quest out there with unnecessary amounts of additive grammar on there. - Man, maybe, I don't feel like, I feel like everything got over localized in the 90s. So I can totally see like a steam game coming out today that has like 24 punctuation marks, but I don't know, back in the day, I think most video game publishers are like, kids hate grammar. So we're gonna limit the amount. Yeah, J-R-R Tolkien, the Lord of the Rings, Vol-1 has six punctuation marks in it. It's a lot, it's a lot. - Yeah, the one I was thinking of actually doesn't have a whole lot of Dragon Quest 11F. Oh, and it echoes, I'm gonna lose some age dash. - It's a longer title, I'll give it that for sure. Well, but efficient on the punctuation. - So we are gonna talk a lot more about this lovely game that has probably more punctuation than good content, if you don't mind a little spoiler here and there. - Did you take that back? - We're also gonna talk about the movie, The Fellowship of the Ring, which I did watch. - And the game is not based on. - The game is not based on 'cause it came out, you know, 20 years before the movie was made or whatever. I don't remember how long it was. - It's really, you know-- - Oh shit, go ahead Phil. - We didn't watch the Ralph Axie version? - No, I haven't seen that one since I was a child and my math teacher was hung over and put it on VC. - Eragorn, Eragorn, I need Tiny Tunic. - Yeah, I don't remember this. - Oh look it up, it's like John Stockton basketball short. - Oh God. - That's a little so small. - Eragorn's Tiny Tunic is my steam name. It's actually weird that you said that. - Eragorn's Tiny Tunic is also my son's name. - Wow. - Eragorn's Tiny Tunic, more. - All right, well, I typed Eragorn's Tiny Tunic in Google. It let me down. So I'll do Ralph Axie. That is a Tiny Tunic. This just in. Tiny Tunics, rule the internet. - Tiny Tunics, more at 11. - More at 11. But before we talk about Tiny Tunics and subpar video games like we usually do, this week on Tiny Tunics, Tiny Tunic Adventure. - Buster Buslius. - Buster being Eragorn's penis. - Right. - Right. - That's canon, it's written into the books. (laughing) It's in the movies too, it's just the extended. - Yeah, yeah, you have to buy the extended, extended-- - Take all the extended for a reason. - In quotes. - We've been up to Dave. - Me, I've been up to playing some Diablo 4. - New expansion recently came out, yeah? - Yeah, I didn't pay for that though. - It's on sale and battle net right now. - I saw that, but see the problem with it is, not the problem, the good news of it is is that I'm playing with Nikki, and that's the reason that I'm playing her. - Oh, gotcha. - Because we were playing Final Fantasy XIV and we got to a point where I was like, hey, I have played through this story already and everything is gated behind the story and I just kinda wanna do some dungeons and stuff instead of going from point A to point B to point C to point D and watching cutscenes. So I was like, can we do something else? And she's like, yep. And I was like, well, here are some options and I gave her some options. And Diablo 4 was one of those. And she's like, yeah, that sounds good. I saw you play in some of that. - Did you have to buy it again so she could play? - I did and that's another reason why I didn't, 'cause you had to buy it twice. - 'Cause I had to buy the expansion twice as well, right. - And the game itself is not discounted. - Yeah, I mean, it was 50 bucks. - I mean, that's expensive. - That's expensive, yeah. - I realized it started it a lot more. - And we even had the conversation, I was like, hey, look, this is $50. We've talked about, so, okay, Blizzard's launching a second World of Warcraft Classic on Thursday. - Yeah, apparently they're in that mood. - Yeah, and it's like Warcraft's 30th anniversary. So like, and I think World of Warcraft's 20th, I think. Don't go me on that. But it's, one of those, I was like, hey, look, I think I wanna play, she, when I told her that I was kind of getting tired of like doing the MSQ again on Final Fantasy XIV, she's like, do you wanna play World of Warcraft? And I was like, I kinda do, but I wanna wait until Classic is, the new Classic is out. And she's like, okay, well, we can do that. What do you wanna do in the meantime? And then like, okay, well, here are some options. And she's like, yeah, Diablo IV. It's like, okay. It's gonna be like $50 unless, I tried to get it to work on Game Pass, but it's, Game Pass is connected to my battle net. - It's all connected together. - So I can confirm that you can't have one overwatch, you can't have your overwatch account logged in on your Xbox and your PC at the same time. It kicks one of the other out. - I can also confirm. Yeah, because she was setting Diablo up and all of a sudden it just, boop, yeah, she was gone. She's like, what happened? And I was like, I just logged in. So I guess we can't do, I guess we have to pay $50. - Blizzard's gonna get their pound of flesh out of you one way or the other. - Yeah, yep. So we've been doing that. That's been fun. I started out as a rogue. She's playing as a sorceress. And boy, I switched to barbarian and I'm having so much more fun. - Nice. - Yeah. - I only played that a little bit, but now that I've got my PC all set up, I think I own that. I'm gonna probably jump in. - Yeah, man. - Get a little. 'Cause I never really got into Diablo to begin with, but I did get Diablo forward with the intention of sitting down and playing. And then I started playing Overwatch again. So it took away all my time. But what I did play of it was cool. - It's fun. I like it. I didn't finish it and single player. And honestly, when we're doing multiplayer and I just said, you get the option to skip the campaign and I was like, yeah, we'll do that. 'Cause it's a seasonal character. So it's like, we are just playing the game where it's like we're just running around, exploring the map, going into dungeons, and not really caring about anything else. So that's been kind of, that's been fun. - Sure. Yeah, it sounds great. - Yep. - And then-- - It feels like one of those games for me, it's like watching an ex-wife have fun with their new husband. Like, I really enjoyed one and two and then we just kind of like drifted apart at three. And now I have no real desire to play four, but I see how much people really enjoyed three and are enjoying four. And it's just like, I, you know, pine for those days when I had that relationship with Diablo, but at this point, it's just, you know, we've got our separate ways. - I get it, man. - I kind of, I went back to Diablo 1 for Nicky was at work and I was like, well, what am I gonna do? I wanna play Diablo 4, but she's at work. And I was like, I know. I love Diablo 1 in Dalton from the Steam Machine podcast. He had mentioned it to me like the previous night. So it just seemed like the perfect time to play it. And yeah, that's a great game. Diablo 1 is a fantastic game. It's not one that I think like a young modern gamer would enjoy 'cause it's so much different than Diablo 4. - Sure. - Diablo 1 is very much like a isometric dungeon crawler. Like it's slow. - I remember you guys playing the shit out of that game. - I love that game. - That's how long ago that's been. - It's been a very long time. Yes. And then Diablo 2, all of a sudden I feel like, Diablo 2 was like not that. Diablo 2 wasn't a dungeon crawler. To me Diablo 2 was like a isometric action game. They're good. I mean, like, you know, it was good. I liked it a lot. It just felt so much, so different than Diablo 1. And then other than playing those games, I've been staying current with Donda Don. - Same. - I fucking love that anime. - I love it too. And I don't know if you saw I posted in a Discord. - I did. - That last episode got me. - Yeah. - I was crying. I was like tearing up at that one because it was the most unexpectedly sweet fucking thing I have ever seen and it really, really hit me. And it, it didn't, I'm not gonna spoil anything for those that haven't watched it yet, but it didn't immediately dawn on me what they were doing. And I was like, what the fuck is going on here? And then it, then it hit me and I was like, oh God, no. And then it just kept getting more and more emotional for me. So yeah, it was really, it's a really good show. - It's a really good show. That's an exceptional episode. - Yeah. - I unfortunately didn't watch it vulnerable enough. - Didn't get to you. Yeah. - I knew it was gonna happen because I didn't know exactly what was gonna happen, but based on how it opened with like the first person like panicked in the streets, I was like, okay, like brace yourself. (laughing) Yeah, strap in 'cause this is gonna be a rough one. And it was, yeah, it got Nikki really, really bad. Another thing that helped me like keep my armor on was during a lot of those emotional parts, Henry is in the office with the door open, playing with like these annoying high pitched tones. - God, so it's taking you right out of the moment. - Yeah, immersion broken. But also it's like, given the subject matter of that episode, it's like, maybe chill out and don't like tell them to stop. - Right, right. Gave you a little bit of an anchor to the reality. - Sure, yeah. - Just be thankful he's in there. (laughing) - But that's about it, honestly. That's about it. - Phil, you got anything to report this week? - Updates on my last appearance on here. I have since consummated my relationship with Shadowheart. We are a fully physical couple. - Nice. - All of the terms, which I was really, like this is my first playthrough through Baldur's Gate 3. And I'm just enjoying all just the little details that are abundant throughout the game. And was happy with one of them, where I am in Act 3, I've reached the titular Baldur's Gate and have found the brothel, where you can hire a pair of drow siblings to pleasure you. - Hell yeah. - Nice. - Hell yeah. - So, you give me the option to do it by yourself or with your preferred partner that you are dating. And at that point, I had not actually consummated our relationship and Shadowheart's response was that she would be open to the idea, but would prefer that if our first time she had me to herself. So, took a couple of long arrests and thank you for coming through that business and then went back to the brothel and we had a very delightful, descriptive four-way event that was just a jewel to experience. - How explicit is it? - So, because they're drow, they make full use of their darkness ability and they turn off the lights and it's all just black and it's like somewhat narrated by the narrator. And there's a couple of little options in there to either be like fully into it or somewhat reticent or whatever, but they all end with everybody having a good old time. - Night vision, night vision, night vision. I'm an elf, I have night vision, turn it on. - It's one of the, I hope the dialogue tree is like, put it in her butt and then you click it, it's like which one, choose one. - Tuesday butt. - Tuesday butt, yeah, there's three options, drow, drow, Shadowheart. (laughing) - It's another one I started and never got back into. - I didn't finish that one, I liked it a lot, but I fell into the trap of, wow, act one's a lot of fun as a rogue. Let's see how act one is as a barbarian. That was fun, let's see how act one is as a monk and it's like, it's the same, it's just playing with the different mechanics, yeah. - Yeah, it's gonna be hard 'cause I wanna go back and experience everything that I did not, and you know, romance different partners and try different classes, but I've already spent probably close to 100 hours on this run that I'm not super eager to go back and do that all over again. So it's probably gonna be more me getting onto YouTube and watching other people's playthroughs and fast tracking to dialogue options and kind of seeing some of those do the cliff notes version of it. - I heard they nerfed some of the horniness in the game. I don't know if that's true or not. That's what I heard too, and let me tell you. (laughing) Lenti Horny. - Okay, good. - It's interesting because I've been looking into this to make sure that I can follow the romance paths correctly and they, while they shut off romance options, if you commit towards one partner at the beginning, some of the other male characters in there, notably Halton and Dale both make it very, very clear that they're interested in you and are so much talked when I don't reciprocate back. So there's room to add other partners into it throughout the game, but you're kind of shoehorned into your one female partner, at least from my run. So no romance in Karlach or Lesel or Menthara who is unfortunately dead in my run, but there's always other opportunities. - I killed Menthara immediately (laughing) 'cause I was playing an assassin and it was like, well, you're an enemy and I can kill you, so we're gonna do that. Gail was like straight up in my playthrough and probably everyone's, and I don't know, I played pre-romance, quote, romance nerf. Gail was straight up like, yo, you wanna fuck, man? (laughing) - Why do you do that? - It's my matter of fact. - Came on real strong, like real fast. Not like super matter of fact, but very much like, oh God, this wizard wants to fuck me bad. - Well Phil had me at shoehorned. (laughing) - Choose a drought, a shoehorn yourself into. - You're still into, trust us, it'll be worth it. - I've made that comparison to a couple of folks that this is just what every female service worker has to contend with if you're just giving basic human kindness to these people because I wasn't actively trying to have sex with Gail or Halston. I was like choosing the friendly options in the dialogue to me of like, yeah, tell me about the weave, tell me about magic, tell me about nature. And they're like, so... - Does this mean we're going somewhere? (laughing) - I just, I'm just showing interest. We're partnering in a work setting. We're trying to accomplish a group goal. You are, especially co-workers, but... - Is there an HR button press? - Yeah, they didn't take the hand, they needed a little bit more firm hand, thank you. (laughing) - My eyes are up here as an option. Excuse me, my eyes are up here Gail. - I have my goth girlfriend over here and we are quite content. - Is there a big titty wizard mod for Baldur's Gate 3? Can you give Gail like a nice set of knockers? (laughing) - Oh, there's a big titty withers mod. (laughing) It's my Gate 3. - Yes. - Yes. - You can, yeah. And there's fan art for it out there too. (laughing) It's great. - Nice. Okay, great. - I wanna say that they pooled like the Baldur's Gate 3 community pooled money to get the voice actor to do like some, what's the, dude, I forget the service where you pay actors to read scripts for you. - Cameo? - Essentially that, like me. Huh? - Is it Cameo? - I think they did Cameo for him to talk about his well endowed chef. So, definitely look that up. - Hey, real quick. We're gonna do a little bit of technical stuff and Phil, if you get disconnected, I'll call you right back. - Okay, Doki. - Are you still there? Oh, I'm so sorry. Wait, Phil, hang in there. Are you still with me? - I'm still here. - Awesome. I had to switch my, to my wireless. It was, for some reason, this thing was connecting to my phone. - Oh shit. - I can't believe it worked as well as it did. - Oh God. - 'Cause we're out here in the sticks and my signal is shitty. - Yeah, minus two. - So, okay. Anyway, sorry, continue, Phil. I'm not cutting any of that out, okay? - I was worried, man. - I did not record on audacity this time. - No, we're good on the recording part. - That's what I was really worried about, 'cause Ian made eye contact with me and I knew something was not right and I was like, fuck man, I feel like the energy is real good. If we have to start over, I'm not gonna be able to bring that. - It's not gonna happen. No, we're good, we're good. I was just, I didn't want my phone to just suddenly decide, nah, I don't think I wanna work. - Right. - Now that we have internet out here, I had to fix it. - Gotta use it. - Yeah, go ahead, sorry, Phil. - Be fair, if we started over again, I would be one cinnamon liquor bottle down. So, I'd be, I'd be primed and ready to go for a second shoot. - All right, all right. They'd just be you and Ian, I'd walk the fuck out. (laughing) - Sorry, I quit. - I can't deal with this. - This isn't the, this is what professionals do. I'm a fucking professional. - I mean, that's, you know, when I lose a save game, it's just like, I can't play that for six days. - Yeah, oh, dude. - An hour of progressing, like, nope. I'm gonna walk away, I'm done. - That hadn't happened to me for so long, and I lost an hour of progress in, God, why am I blanking on the name of the game that I've been playing so fucking much? Disco Elysium. - Oh yeah. - I lost an hour in Disco Elysium, and it was like, 'cause I thought it was gonna auto-save when I quit, and for whatever reason, it did not. And I'm usually the guy who, like, manually saves, like, four times before I quit. And the one time I fucking trust a game. (laughing) I lose, and it's like, this is why I do it. - Why I do this? You made me this way. - But fortunately, the way that game works is it's like, I was able to make up an hour of progress in like literally 10 minutes. - Nice. - Because it's like, okay, walk here, and I'm not reading the dialogue this time, 'cause that game is like all dialogue. So it's just like, okay, click, click, click, click, click, okay, walk over here, click, click, click, click. - You have to think about it. - Right, yeah. - Last time that happened to me was for one of our ad-pog discord games of the month where about a third of the way through Super Mario RPG, I just, I turned it back on, and the saved game is erased and dead, and like, I'm done. - Yeah. - That's fun, but I'm not gonna go back to this for, it's been several years now. - Yeah, yep, that sting, especially in retro games. - Yeah. Other than that, just preparing for bank giving, I got the in-laws coming from Idaho to day with us for a couple of days, and we're gonna host, actually, my parents are gonna host both my family and my wife's parents, so. - Cool. - It'll be interesting. - Yeah, I'm ready for Thanksgiving. I'm just right, honestly, I'm just ready for the time off work. - Yeah, me too, and that's next week, so it's like, and I managed to score the day before Thanksgiving off. - Nice. - So I got Monday, Tuesday, next week, and then I'm off for the rest of the fucking week. - Hell yeah. - So, yeah. - That's really nice. - I'm too, I'm not as big into the food and the stuff as everybody else, but I do like the time off and just having nothing but shit I wanna do to do. - That's good. - That's what I'm thankful for. - Yes, me too. - I got a bit of an unpopular opinion. I don't really like Thanksgiving food that much. Like, outside of kind of some of the traditional turkey ham roll kind of things. Yeah, outside dishes, like kind of give or take. - Yeah, I'm with you, Phil. I could give it, you know, I could take it or leave it. For me, I like it fine, but I don't like look forward to it because of the food. It's just, for me, it's just, I like holidays because I don't have to work. It comes with food and I eat well, but that's, you know, I don't like care if it's there or not. - I like getting drunk and watching football at 11 a.m. on a Thursday. That's apparently what I enjoy about Thanksgiving. - I haven't done that before, that does sound good. (laughs) - Got some good food. - Can I drink a glass of wine and watch lions at 11 15 a.m. and nobody's gonna judge me? - Correct, yes you can. And you can do that this year. The lions are playing the bears as usual on Thanksgiving. For those of you that don't know, Netflix is also hosting football for the first time ever on Christmas, my team. My team, Pittsburgh, is playing. - They've got a good crack record of hosting live sports so far. - So far, so good, Netflix. - Yep. - Did you guys watch the 99% show as well? - One of my talking points tonight was gonna be the Tyson Paul fight. - That's on my notes and I left it home. I was gonna talk about that too. - We did watch it. The matches leading up to the Tyson fight were fucking great. Had a great time watching it. Of course, again, as it got closer to the main event, things started really, as everyone knows, 'cause everyone I know watched this thing. - Everyone I know at least knows how it went, whether they watched it or not. - It was rough, they took down Netflix, which is hard to do. 'Cause like, I think I heard some-- - I've only been hosting live sporting events for 60 years, you know. - Right. - At what 60 billion people watching the finale of "Mash" or like "Super Bowl III," but we can't have Tyson Paul for, I don't know how many people were tuned into this, but it was a lot. - Pretty epic fail on Netflix part. - I'm glad they got it turned up and it started working fine towards the end. I mean, we watched, once it got, from our, from my house, we got through, the glitchiness stopped about halfway through the women's fight and then it stayed pretty consistent. It would, it would glitch for a sec, but it would always, it wouldn't go out for 10 minutes like it was doing, so. - I gave up during the women's fight. I was like, well, you know what? I don't want, I'm just going to watch this later. I'm just going to like, let it sit for two hours then I'm going to come back and watch it. It's not like we were having a party or anything. - Yeah. - So it's like, yeah, it sucks that I can't watch it live. I just didn't want to risk it on the big fight, you know. Which turned out to be. - Not much of a fight. - Yeah. - And, you know, I didn't, I had hoped to see it go differently. Obviously I would love for Mike Tyson to have come out there and just been the old Mike Tyson, but that's just not possible. - It made me sad. - It was sad, but also in a way I was proud to see him get out there and say, you know what? You know, 'cause he had a lot of really seriously bad medical problems earlier this year. And it was, they had to postpone it because of this. And so Mike Tyson posted on his Twitter account. I'm not gonna ever call it X. This is one of those situations when you lost, but still one, I'm grateful for last night, no regrets to get in the ring one last time. I almost died in June, had eight blood transfusions, lost half my blood and 25 pounds in the hospital and had to fight to get healthy to fight. So I won. To have my children see me stand toe to toe and finish eight rounds with a talented fighter, half my age in front of a packed Dallas Cowboy Stadium is an experience that no man has the right to ask for. Thank you. So I love that he posted that. And that's how I felt about it. I was glad to see him get up there and do it, you know? I didn't have any real belief that he was gonna win even though it would have been cool. - That would have been great. - It would have been amazing. 'Cause I'm not gonna tell you I'm a huge fan of Jake Paul, but it would have been nice to see him win and remind him who he was. But it just wasn't in the cards. And that's okay. 'Cause it was a fun time. We had a good time watching. Tonya had never watched a boxing match before. So the ones that we watched leading up. - Yeah, she got to see some good ones. - She got to see some really good ones. I said, look, sometimes it's like when you watch NASCAR, it's usually pretty boring. Until fights like this happen, which is what everybody was hoping for, those two fights were really great. And we had a blast. So it was a fun event. I'm glad they did it. It was a lot of fun. - Go ahead, Phil. - I was saying, as the saying goes, father time is undefeated. - True. - Yeah, true. - Yeah, as much as we, I think, collectively wanted like Tyson, America's favorite rapist, apparently. We all love Mike Tyson, despite his many flaws. And, but we're all rooting for him to beat the shit out of a, what's effectively the world's most successful international, you know, good with the Paul for turning, being a wrestling heel into a $40 million purse. I feel like he's winning just as much as Tyson is. - Oh, yeah. - But... - Man. - It wasn't in the cards for, you know, what we all wanted to see. - The end of that, dude, with like the after fight interview was like the cringiest fucking like sports entertainment. - Yeah. - Like, and I was like, oh my God, are you really doing this? Where it's like Logan Paul, did you guys see that? - Yes. - That's a fight where it's like-- - Oh, I'll kick your ass, Tyson. - He said, "I'll fucking kill you." - I'll fucking kill you. Yeah, that's what it was, sorry. - To which I was like, "Fight right now." - Get him. - I was like, "Damn it, you're doing wrestling shit to me." - Yeah. (laughs) Save the wrestling for wrestling, which is also gonna start airing on Netflix. - Is it really? - WWE is over with. - Is it Logan Paul? He's a wrestler, isn't he? - No, no way. I think he's a wrestler. - I don't know anything about him. - Yeah. - I don't care. (laughs) - I just can't bring myself to give a fuck. - Yeah. - And I've never given a fuck about Jake Paul until his fight, and now I work to not giving a fuck to God. - It worked for one night. - Yeah, it did. - Just like he wanted. - Yeah. - He got it. - They worked for one night or was like, "I don't like him." (laughs) - Oh yeah, no, it turns out I still don't like it. - Yeah. - And I just don't care. - Yeah. - That I don't like it. - I hope the convicted rapist punches him 'til he is unconscious. - Pretty much. - It's, you know, there was always that question of, you know, would you, how much money would it take for you to get into the ring with Mike Tyson, take a punch from Mike Tyson. - Right. - And I feel like this flipped it on its head, whereas like, if you're a 60 year old, how much money would it take for you to get in the ring with a, you know, - 28 year old. - You're in a pound, 28 year old throwing punches at you. And it's like, "Yeah, for 20 million dollars, I'll get my ass handed to me by a loud mouth bitch." - And I'm closer to 60 than not. (laughs) So, Jake Paul, I challenge you right now. For 20 million dollars, I will fight you at the Taco John's-- - Right now. - On Bridge Street. - Right now, I don't care. If you're 20 million, I'll fight you anywhere. I will lose. He's a big boy and he's had a lot of practice. I have never boxed a day in my life. One hit, I'm going down. - I did in VR. - 20 million dollars. - So I can probably take him. - Yeah, I promise. - Yeah, I got him, I think. - We boxing got me ready. - How about you and I, you and I box him. - Oh perfect. - At the same time. - I think that'd be good. - It might actually make it harder. - Mike, I'd split the 20 million. We just, each of us get 10, I'd be cool with that. - Yeah, I could make that work for a couple years. - Easily, maybe. We'll see. Taxes, the economy. - Think about it. - Think about it. - In addition to watching the Mike Tyson fight this past week, I watched some other stuff if y'all would like to hear about it. - Hell yeah. - Of course Don and Don was on my list as well as Ronna one half. - I'm one episode behind, I gotta catch up. - I've got one more, I've got one as well. It just came out, so I haven't watched it. - A two behind it. - This last one made me laugh pretty hard, it was pretty good. - It's a good, it's a good remake. - I'm enjoying the show, I sometimes forget that that show takes place in the 80s. And I'm like, this is Japan, why is nobody using the cell phone? Oh yeah, it takes place in the 80s. But yeah, it's a great show, it's, I love the pace of it, it's really witty and all the girls are cute. So that's a big place. - Yeah, it's a fun one. - I also, as most of you know, if you've listened to the show, I started watching One Piece in October. - Right. - I'm still watching it. - People are placing bets. - People are starting to place bets, and if you're not on the Discord, which you really should be, at bit.ly/tagpod. Discord, you can go to bit.ly/tagpod1peace and you have access to the calendar where I am placing the dates that people think that I'm going to finish watching One Piece on Netflix in its entirety. - And the biggest question is, can Ian finish watching One Piece before Jake Paul finishes watching One Piece? - I think I might have a head leg up on him, but he probably already watches One Piece. - He's got the money advantage. He can be like, you know what, I'm not gonna earn money until I'm done watching One Piece and it would all work out. - Yeah, it would work out. - Me, not so much, but I am watching it. I am probably maybe most of the way through season two at this point. So for those of you keeping track, you can do the math if you want. There's no saying that I won't stop watching it for a week or two and then pick it back up. The rule is that once you've picked a date, if you wanna message me on Discord, I will put your name on the date you've picked if it's not taken by somebody else. That's what the link is for for you to check to see if your date's available. bit.ly/tagpog1piece. As long as you get it within a week of me actually finishing up to the last possible, if I get to the last episode and they release a whole season of that show, I still have to finish that. - You gotta watch that season, right? - I have to be One Piece completely finished and nothing new on Netflix for it to count, but if you get it within a week, you'll win some crap from my toy box, wherever the fuck that is, it's in here somewhere. And if not, if your date passes, if you pick a date and that goes past that date-- - We execute you. - I'm still watching One Piece, then you must die. - Yeah, that's in the rules. I hope you read the rules. - And it's legally buying your out. So if you wanna try, if you miss your date, I will allow you to pick another date in the future, as long as it's not someone else's. And if you get it within a week, great. But if someone else is closer to you and it's in the same week, the person that's closest wins, obviously. So good luck. Could be five years from now, we never know. I don't think there's gonna be enough participation for it to matter much, how many times people get to re-guest the date. But I will do my best to keep everyone posted. Maybe I won't. Maybe I'll just let it hang and then one day I'll be like, oh, by the way, I finished One Piece. And the winner is nobody, because everybody forgot to stop playing. - It'd be great if you're like, by the way, I finished One Piece two months ago. (laughing) - Yes. - I mean, I'm the waiting for Lord of the Rings, Volume Two for the Super Nintendo. - Me too. - It came out on the PC, guys. It came out on the PC. - Oh, sweet. - I also have, I watched a movie called, well, I'll, yeah, I'll go do this one now. I watched a movie over the weekend. A Jason Reitman filmed called Saturday Night. It's about a little known show that comes on NBC on Saturday Night at 11.30 called Saturday Night Live. It's basically a-- - It sounds interesting. - It's a historical piece sort of about the first episode. What led up to the first episode of Saturday Night going live? And it's like a real time, follows Lauren Michaels around and you see all the actors that play like Chevy Chase, Dan Aykroyd, Gilder Radner, the original, not ready for prime time players. It's a good movie. I really enjoyed it. I think they did an excellent job of setting that, especially if you've ever watched old Saturday Night Live and liked it. Or even if you didn't, it's a really good look into how fucking crazy it is that everyone thought, the thing that's cool about watching this movie is they constantly remind you, maybe a few too many times that no one's ever gonna let NBC's not ever gonna let this show air. You're not gonna get to week two. I'm betting against you, you know, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then, but you know watching the movie, you know that the show has been on for almost 50 years at this point without fail. Kind of like Tadpog. Tadpog's only been on the air just a little longer than Saturday Night Live. Yeah, so, but they're not doing any movies about us for some reason, which is weird. And much like Saturday Night Live, the worst episode of Tadpog had Steven Seagal on it. Exactly, exactly. But they did, they do talk about like how, what they were gonna do and what they were doing on Saturday Night Live or Saturday nights at that time, was they were showing reruns of Carson. And that was making them a lot of money. But-- (laughing) It's hilarious to me. And they had the Carson tape for the episode they were gonna run queued up. And it came down to seconds before they decided whether or not they were gonna let it happen. And spoilers, they let it happen. And the show was a huge hit and so on. I was hoping you were gonna say spoilers, they played Carson and then next week, Saturday Night Live started. That'd be a great way to end the movie. It would be funny. (laughing) That was an option on the table for them, actually. They considered like giving them another week to get their shit to the exhibit. It was so frantic and things were crazy and not coming together and things were breaking and the lighting guy quit. I mean, it's just a lot of things that were really fun. The guy that they got, Matthew Reese, I think Matthew Reese is his name. He plays George Carlin, who was the first host. - Yeah. - You might know him from the show The Americans. He was in the app. Anyway, great movie. I really enjoyed it. It was a fun time. - Cool. - It's about the length of an episode of Saturday Night Live. - What is it called again? - Saturday Night. - Okay. - Yep. (laughing) - I don't know how the guy-- - The show was just called Saturday Night. And it just sort of the live kind of got tacked on later. But pretty good movie. I liked it a lot. I recommend it. - Cool. - Jason Reitman is Ivan Reitman's son who directed the Ghostbusters Afterlife movie. - Right. - So good direction, had that same kind of feel to it. I really dug it. - Cool. - Three and a half stars. Wasn't safe, so just check it out. Let's see, what else have I got? Nothing much. If anyone wants to send me $900, I still have not managed to get my Xbox return to go through. - What the fuck? - No one will call me back. No one will answer my calls. And the only ones that will answer my calls is the bank financing the purchase and they don't give a shit about it. They said, well, we don't know that you don't have it. So therefore, we can't stop making you pay for it. And you need to work that out with where you bought it. I have been trying to get in touch with the company that received the package. The last place the thing was seen was a place in Louisville called Solutions and the number two go. Solutions to go is where it went. It was signed for and never don't have any idea where it is now. - Can they ask that guy? - I have called, I want him to. I've called the company and asked for some help. And they like to let me connect you with the customer service lady. She doesn't answer, leave her a message. She will definitely call you back. That was a month ago. I have called three times and left messages and they are not returning my call, which means I'm going to keep calling and hopefully, I can get someone on the phone and say, hey, there's this guy. His name is Wally, strangely enough, that's signed for this package on this date. - I want to, it might be. I want to know where that is. So, if anyone listening to the show works for Solutions to go, have your customer service department call me. They've got my number, I promise. - You should take into people's court. - Listen, have you ever listened to the people's court theme? - The whole thing? - All the big one now. - It's great. - It's a fucking great song. - It is a great song. - It's a great song, guys. Listen to it, some massive bongos like you never heard in your life and the big one. That song was the theme song for a British TV show in the 60s called The Hanged Man. - Really? - Yeah. I thought this was going to be like an Austin Powers joke. - No, it's real. It was really used for a show in Britain called The Hanged Man. - Interesting, we'd use it for a courtroom show. - Yeah, and then they ended up taking it. It was also in a very hot scene in the 1977 porn of one of my favorites, a barber broadcast, which is weird. - I remember you talking about one. - Watching porn to the theme of the people's court, but did somehow it worked, I don't know. Go figure. - I can see it working. - It works. Check it out. Listen to what he says, check it out. It's really all I've got right now. I have been playing Overwatch and they did the Overwatch classic. - Classic, yeah, how's that? - It sucks. - Oh, that sucks here. It sucks because the game has changed so much. I don't know how we played at this level. I don't understand how this game succeeded. So much has changed for the better and I think that people haven't given Blizzard enough credit for that. Hang on. - Make sure-- - Don't worry about it. - Okay. Oh. (laughs) Thank you, Phil. I thought you got disconnected in the barber broadcast. I thought you got disconnected and we're messaging. Did it fill us in the link to barber broadcast? - I'll put that on the discord. - I'm gonna be busy for the next little hour or so. - It's about an hour and a half. - All right, I'll catch y'all later. - Lots of hair. - Lots of hair. - All right, I'm back in the show. - That's cool. - I like it. - So it depends. - But anyway, I don't think Blizzard's gotten enough credit for the changes they've made, the quality of life improvements and the reasons they've done what they've done until you go back and play the game in version one, and you realize, holy fuck, things were so different. And it's been fun playing it. I'm over it right now, but they're gonna go to the next version this coming week. - Oh, that's fast. - It would've been yesterday as of the airing of this episode. But it's been a lot of fun. I've been having a good time playing it. It's very nostalgic. They're playing the old theme when you sign back in, the old music, the (imitates music) it's just really, it was neat to get in there and have that sort of immersion again, and that I haven't had since I played it from the beginning. - Right. - So they really got me in the fields with that, and it's been a lot of fun, but boy, oh boy, that game has changed, and it is so much harder to get used to. No limits, you can have as many tanks as you want, or as many healers as you want. Usually it's all Winston's or all Roadhogs. And then people realize that doesn't work, and then they switch off, and then people start getting mad like, "Play healer," and I'm like, "Fuckin' you play healer." I'm trying to get an achievement here. I'm playing 15 games as a defense character, right? No, but that's been a lot of fun. And I recommend it. Anyone at Kaiser Arc, I'm sorry, I missed your message the other night. He messes me. He was playing, it was three in the morning before I saw it. I was like, "No." - So you were playing? - I wasn't playing at that time, but-- - You were up to something. - I was some Barbara Broadgast. - I was drinking, I was drinking. I do that again now, by the way, but yeah, it was, so anyway, I've been playing a lot of that, having a lot of fun with that. And the new season comes in a few weeks. It's gonna be probably the Christmas stuff, so anyone that's interested wants to get in and hook around and overwatch with me, please feel free. I am Mosbunny, I'm a battle net. And I have other shit, but I'll tell it next week. - Okay. - This is fine. I think I'm good on my things. So you guys, do you wanna talk about Lord of the Rings? We're gonna talk about Fellowship of the Ring? - Yes. - The Newvy? - Yes. - Yeah. - Yeah, I didn't do a tadpog totals this week because I tend to only do them for movies that I find just a little bit ridiculous, and I kinda don't find this movie a bit ridiculous. I really like this movie, and I don't wanna make fun of it. - I had not seen this movie since I saw it in the theater when it came out. - Wow. - Yep, and-- - How did you feel about it watching it again after so long? - It was awesome, and I liked it. I forgot how good it was, and not only did I forget how good it was, I liked it better this time. - I did too. - And it was just like, and Henry watched it, and he begrudgingly watched it for the first half, and then the last half, he was glued to the screen, and when it was over, it was like, what do you think? He's like, it was really good. I didn't understand what was going on. I was like, well, that's because you were pouting for the first half of the movie. - Right, right. - But I'm glad that you liked the last half. I have seen it in fits and starts, you know, since I watched it in the theater, and never really sat down and re-watched it that I'm aware of, I might have, but I tend to try to get mad when it's on, and we're like, someone's like, fine, yes, fine, you can watch "Lord of the Ring." - It's a commitment. - It is, but then I think I sat down and watched it this time, and I did not watch the extended version, I went ahead and just watched the-- - I didn't watch the theatrical. - The theatrical release, and I had the same experience, Dave. I was like, begrudgingly at first, like, okay, yep, there's Frodo, they're all smiling and being stupid, and oh shit, I remember this, this is good. - Right. (laughs) - Oh yeah, oh fuck, I forgot. - Right, yeah. - Oh yeah, dude! - Yeah. - By the time it was over, I was like, I kind of want to watch. - I did too. - I didn't, I did not watch because I just didn't have time. - Well, I didn't do it because I didn't want to get movies fucking confused for the show. - Yeah, yes, 'cause it's so easy to do because those movies were all filmed at once, and then edited and released over a couple of years, and I honest to God thought this part with the spider was in the first movie. It's in the last movie, it's in the Return of the King, so I'm glad I watched it and just stopped 'cause I knew we were going to be talking about this, and I'm like you, I didn't want to lose track of it. - I want to watch the other two though. - Me too. - 'Cause I recently sort of watched Adam at work with John, but I do want to sit down and give him a good watch now. - I loved it, man, we all sat, like our whole family sat down and watched it, and it was, yeah, I loved it, I loved it. It was, I don't know how it was better than the first time I saw it. And I think it's just been, 'cause it's been so long. I think there's, I think my age played in it. - Yeah, I'm watching it as an older person now, and that made a difference, I think. Phil, what's your experience with the movie? How do you feel about it? - I've watched it so many times that they all bleed together. The extended editions are on Max. If you are a subscriber to HBO Max, you can watch all three extended editions. They're around four hours each. It is a commitment. I have been folding laundry and watching it in bits and pieces. I actually did my annual watch about four weeks ago, so this is somewhat fresh in my head. I say annual, but it's, you know, every now and then, every few years, I might watch it in college where I roomed with a bunch of Tolkien heads, a bunch of Lord of the Rings fans. We would ritualistically watch this all the time, have regular case race events where we would each get a case of beer on a Saturday morning and attempt to watch all three extended editions back to back to back and finish the case of beer in those world hours. So I am acutely in tune with this. This is one of my favorite franchises ever, which is why I was on the list and which is why the Super Nintendo game has such a profoundly disappointing kind of experience that I had. We'll get to that later, the movie itself. I think part of the reason why it was so great for you guys is just like how good it holds up really. It really does. Some of the special effects, like don't, like some of the special things like-- I didn't see the-- Like the huge battle, like it was like, oh, okay, well, they don't do that a lot. And the good news is they don't, they don't do that a lot. But for the most part, a lot of the effects do hold up. And I know they're doing like the force perspective, like practical effects. Look for Emily and stuff, yeah. And all that stuff I feel like really holds up. If I think about it too hard, there are moments where it's like, my brain starts working against me and it's like, okay, pay attention to the size of Frodo in this scene and compare it to the size of Frodo. You know what I mean? - Yeah. - And it's like-- - You just stop. - Yeah, right. - You gotta stop. - You're right. - Taking yourself out. - Where they had a body double versus where they had like the actual person. And you know, sometimes the body double is for Frodo. Sometimes you've got like a seven and a half foot tall like Gandalf double with Elijah Woods in there. And so, you know, you can kind of see it here and there, but you know, I think part of what makes this movie so good is that they relied on practical effects. And you know, either because they were better or because just the, they were cheaper than doing computer effects, which have kind of taken over now and just too noticeable. You know, you compare this to the Hobbit trilogy that came out, you know, seven or eight years later, that is largely CGI. And it just, it looks and feels a lot more just not fake. You know? - Yeah. - It feels not genuine compared to, you know, the amount of time you put into whether it's the prosthetics on the dwarves or the armor that they built individually or, you know, the thousands of extras that they employed throughout the three different films to make this, it's just, it has a feel of authenticity that is not really something that you see in current film. - Yeah. And I think part of the problem that I had was the saturation. It was everywhere. Everyone wanted to watch it all the time. I was super into it forever. And then I just kind of got burned out on it. And it was nice to come back to it and watch it with a fresh perspective. And just really be able to, you know, like you said, some of the effects stuff aside, it really doesn't feel like a fucking, what, 20 year old movie? Maybe when did it come out? - Yeah, I think it's-- - 2001, so it's 23 years. - 23 years. - Yeah, it didn't feel, it made me feel old, but yeah, it doesn't feel like it's a 23 year old movie. - No, like, now there's no way it came out 23 years. - It didn't feel like when I watched a new hope in high school. - Right. - You know what I mean? Like when I watched a new hope in high school, I was like, this movie is old, but I like it. - But I like it, yeah. - It felt good to watch it and be, and I, you know, I found myself being reminded of some of the things that I had forgotten that were so kind of heavy. Like the fact that Aragon is Eseldor's, you know, relative 30 generations removed. And it's been that long in the story since the king has set the throne of Gondor. And I'm like, god damn, that's 3000 years. So as an adult, I'm starting to do math that I didn't bother to do when I was a kid. And I'm like, God, this is heavy. This is big stuff. No wonder they're so worked up, you know? - Imagine the air of like Ramsey's the second from Egypt comes back. - Yes. - Like I am ready to rule again. - To that extent. - In my kingdom. - That's exactly- - Fucking good analogy. - Got it. He hit it right on the head. That is exactly where my mind was going. Like I'm thinking of 3000 years ago. This, you know, predates Christ by 700 years, right? So we're like- - But these slaves are at disposal by kingdom. (laughing) - No, no, I'm sorry. - No, Ramsey's the 16th. No, I'm sorry. (laughing) - But yeah, it's neat to go back and watch with this perspective because I missed out on a lot of that when I was younger. And I wasn't, you know, I was in my 20s, late 20s. But there's a big difference between late 20s and early 50s when it comes to your perspective. - Yeah, for sure. - And especially something is kind of deep and as important as these books were. I mean, they've been around forever, right? Since like the 50s and he did a good job. - Kind of set the standard. - Kind of, oh, I thought you were about talking. But yeah. - Of course, I mean, he did. He set that standard for fantasy. - I mean, yeah, everything is fucking built around what he wrote, which is crazy when you think about it. It's like, it is, think about like, if he hadn't written those, it's like how far, it's like another like 3,000 years condensed, but it's like, oh man, I wouldn't have been able, probably wouldn't have, that hint-eye with the alpha getting fucked by the orc with the big dick. I probably wouldn't have even seen that. - You've been able to jerk off to that. - Never would have existed. (laughing) - It is crazy what a standard he said. And then I think, you know, Peter Jackson comes along and sets the standard for how well a movie can represent a book. And I think they're long, but they needed to be. - Yeah, they're done right. - They're done right. And it's really kind of an unbelievable achievement that I didn't appreciate then, but I do now. And I'm glad we did watch this one. - Yeah, man. - Yeah, it's kind of, kind of, not kind of, it is impressive the amount of work that went into realizing this. Like the amount of care and diligence that you don't see being used in adaptations of other written materials, you know, going to find the artists that have, you know, conceptualized the world of Tolkien, going to find scholars that are, you know, you're consulting on the material, finding like linguists that are familiar with, you know, Tolkien's, you know, very extensive made up languages. Like everything about this is just so authentically and diligently reproduced that it kind of, it sets the standard for how to bring something like this to the screen. And even in that regard, from what I recall, the Tolkien estate wasn't exactly fond of this because, you know, it was very much a Hollywood version. There's love stories where there weren't love stories in the book, there's battles and epic fights and things that, you know, you have to make this digestible for a movie audience in a way that walking for 900 pages in a book is just not something that can be filmed. So, you know, understandably, the people who were closest to this, the Tolkien estate were not exactly railed with the end result, but, you know, sometimes you have to step away from that and see, you know, what this is and realize that they did just a masterful job at turning this into such an influential and exceptional piece of media. - Yeah, adapting it for the media. - Yeah, and I think I get why the Tolkien estate might have been a bit put off-put by it, but see, I hadn't read any of those books before I saw these movies. After I saw the movies, I read the books. - Yeah. - And so that introduced me to something, it influenced me enough to want to read the source material because I had known it had been around for so long, it's just never been something that I was sure I wanted to get into. Now that I know the story from the movies, I was like, yeah, I want to read these books. And the books, I think, were easier, would have been harder for me to understand had I not seen the movies first to get sort of that foundation. Here's the broad strokes. - Right, sure. - And then if you want the details, read the book. And that was like that for Harry Potter for me, too. I didn't read the Harry Potter books until I had seen the first couple of movies, and then I was like, okay, I'm going to read these books. And I'm glad I did because I probably wouldn't have otherwise. The same thing applied to the book Wicked. We went and saw Wicked on Broadway in New York and I had no idea how good that story was. Saw the play and I was like, fuck yeah, I'm going to read this book because, you know, so I think it benefited the Tolkien estate despite their reservations. I think it benefited because I'm sure there were a lot of people like me who went back and bought copies or read the book for the first time after seeing the movie. So, you know, that's another thing that if it's done right, it can send people in the right direction. - Sure, yeah. - To get more of the story. - I agree with you and far as, 'cause I read Fellowship of the Ring before the movie. And I remember finishing Fellowship of the Ring and being like, I am not sure that I am going to read the next book. And then I saw the movie and I was like, yes, this is more for me, you know what I mean? Like, this is more my speed. So that's the only, I mean, I read The Hobbit, I don't count that, but out of the trilogy, the only one I read is Fellowship. - The Hobbit, you mean the 200 page book that they turned into 12 more hours of movie? Which I really liked The Hobbit. - Yeah, it's a great book. - I mean, I think The Hobbit's fantastic. The book, just to be clear. - Yeah. - Yeah, it's weird 'cause it's like the poetry of that is I only saw the first Hobbit movie. So I read all of the Hobbit, only saw the first movie. - I only saw the first movie of The Hobbit as well, which, yeah, it's weird 'cause-- - It's the only one worth watching and even then I'm not a fan, but they get progressively more harder to watch. - Drawin' out. - Yeah, 'cause I mean, if you haven't seen The Hobbit, they padded out with all the work, all kind of some of the additional content from The Lord of the Rings appendices because that's what they had the rights for, you know? - Right. - A lot of these movies are kind of built along how the rights are distributed. So you can't draw from the Silmarillion because the token of the state still holds that, but you can draw from the appendices because you bought the rights to that. And so it's like, get all these additional bits and pieces that are essentially like, we wanna give fans of Lord of the Rings, some additional Lord of the Rings content. So even though Legaloth and Gandalf and Galadriel are not really in what Gandalf is, but you know, a lot of the people aren't in The Hobbit Book, we're gonna bring them back because people are familiar with them and this success of that movie. So, you know, it's-- - Yeah, it's weird. - Tied in a lot of weird places. And yeah, it's hard. Credit to Vigo Mortensen, who I believe was not to come back to The Hobbit because he was like, Aragorn's not in The Hobbit. - Right. - So why would I come back for that? That doesn't make sense. Plus it was 50 years ago and I was a baby when Bilbo was doing his thing. - Now I had a plume on the other hand as like, I will accept that for me. - Because I was a hundred. - Now I haven't seen, since I've only seen The First Hobbit movie, can you explain to me how by the end of the third movie, it connects to the Troll 2 universe? (laughing) - I'm sorry, I can't follow that up. That's too good. (laughing) - My favorite part of the movie, Fellowship of the Ring, is the scene with the two guys named E.M. in it. (laughing) - Yeah, all right. - Yeah. - Gandalf and Bilbo, E.N. home. - Right. - Yeah. - Like there's two eons on the screen right now. It never happened. - Movie, did we just recently watch for the show that had E.N. - E.N. home? - Yeah. - Was it, was it, was it Alien? - We were talking about Alien, we didn't play it. Okay, thank you. - Yeah, he was Bishop in Alien. - Yeah, yeah. - Also, Moria. I like to, I love the scene in Moria. The whole like, you know, last part of the movie, when they're in Moria and it's Moria and the Bauragh comes and the whole, I love that scene. I love that whole part. - Oh yeah, it's great. - Because it's creepy as fuck. - Oh yeah, it's amazing. - But I also marvel at the minds of Moria. Like John, I played the Lord of the Rings online with John for a long time. - Yeah. - And when we got, I was so pumped. When we got to Moria, I was like, oh my God, we're actually here. You know, it was just great. I love that part. And I love the, you know, how they're trying to be so quiet and then pimp and fuck and knocks the warmer down the well. And the whole scene is so tense, but also humorous. - That felt very Peter Jackson to me. - It did. - In a good way. Like I like Peter Jackson, but that whole like, yeah, the skeleton going down the well and then-- - Everybody had that like cringe look like, oh fuck. And it didn't happen. Like, phew. And then it, the drums start, you know, I just-- - Yeah. - I had forgotten how much I liked all that shit. - Yeah. - And it really-- - Same, I forgot about that scene entirely. - Yeah, me too. - Which is a shame 'cause it's a good scene. - 'Cause you get, you go to, you go straight to the end and you're in my mind, I'm going straight to Mordor, right? - Right. - It's just that, it's the last thing you see. - And I forgot how little Gollum is in this movie. - I know. - Which is good because he looks terrible. - Yeah, it is good. - The brief shot that you get weirdly enough because the Valrog and the troll and Moria, I feel are really exceptionally done CGI for the time. - Yeah. - And you compare that to like the couple of shots of, of Gollum and it's, for whatever reason, it doesn't quite translate. - I know what you mean, but I gotta, but I was really, really impressed by that shot of Gollum, where it's like just his face, and he's got those like excited cat eyes on, you know, where like their pupils are like 98% of their eyes. There's a, I thought that shot was, I thought I was like, damn, that looks way better than I, than I remember. But yeah, like the full body shots and stuff, I feel like those kind of aren't super great. I was really-- - Having just, sorry, having just watched the two towers and I'm about to watch Return of the King, I'm reminded of like how, despite them all being filmed back to back to back, the level of CGI advancement and those, you know, subsequent years really, really made a difference. The, the Gollum in Return of the King is noticeably better than the one in two towers. - Yeah, and it's like, it had that same kind of phenomenon where, you know, the CGI got better because of the CGI in the first movies and they improved upon what they had already done during the course of the movies being made, just like with the Matrix, you know, the Matrix's effects got better because the Matrix made a zillion dollars and then they were like, okay, so now we can throw even more money at what we do and thereby improving those effects. That'll make it better, right? - Yeah, they'll definitely be better. - Everyone's gonna love these two movies after this one. - Especially the third one. Well, I know we'll release it a month after the second one. That'll get 'em, they'll love it. - They won't, but gradually go see the third one because they saw the second one, didn't love it, but they're like, fuck, I guess I'll see how this ends. - Yeah. - They won't do that. - That won't happen. - They'll go because they love it. (laughing) - Kiana Jesus, hashtag Kiana Jesus. - I was so relieved that Gollum wasn't like in this movie prominently because I was like, man, 'cause Henry's watching this, he is gonna fucking like not buy in on Gollum. There's no way my son is gonna buy in, and he's gonna leave and he's gonna go play Minecraft, which, you know, looks so much better than Gollum. - Sure. (laughing) - Yeah, like video game where everything looks like it's made out of cereal boxes more entertaining than this. - But yeah, I was relieved. I was like, all right, dodge that bullet. - He's a bit much. I don't like, you know, I know you're not supposed to. - Right. - Gollum irritates the shit out of it. - Sure, yeah. - Like, I can't stand him. Like, I know the guy did a great, Andy Serkis, he did a great job, he always does. He's great at what he does, almost too good, because that just really despised that little fuck. And I don't like it to the point where I don't like watching him on screen. Like, you know, like it's funny because at one point in the movie, in the first movie, Frodo gets the idea that I've had all along, is why don't I just kill the fucker? And Gandalf's like, well, even some piece of shit like him can play a part in the big picture. So you might not rush to judgment and rush to stick in a sword through his head, like we all want to do. - But Gandalf, what about free will? (both laughing) - So I get his purpose in having seen all the movies several times, this and that several times. - Yeah. - I know why, I know why he's there. - Right, sure. - I know what happens. - It's good foreshadowing. - It is, and it makes me go, "Oh, thank God." At the very end, I should say at the first ending to the third movie, you know, there's seven endings to that movie. - Yeah. - I told John, we were watching at it the other day, that up until Return of the King, the movie Maverick, starring Mel Gibson and Jody Foster, held the record for the most false endings, 'cause it never ends. It's like they'll end it and we cut to another scene. - Now they're in-- - Now they're in tubs. (both laughing) - Now they're in tubs, smoking cigars, and then they cut to another scene. I was like, "Jesus Christ, I gotta pee." You know, but-- - Passion of the Christ. (both laughing) - But then Return of the King happened in that movie, I think it's still going from the first time, I think it's still endings are still happening. - Procedurally generating endings. - Yes, yes. - And they still cut out like a third of the ending of their actual book. - How did I know? - We didn't get any of the scouring of the Shire. - Nope. - So-- - That'd have been great. If we just had an extra 45 to 60 minutes of hobbits going back and waging guerrilla war in the Shire, people would have loved that. - Yeah, there definitely wouldn't have been any bite leaving early for that one. - Could they just played the last half of Return of the Jedi, and no one would know the difference? - Yeah. (both laughing) - Funny, Gandalf wasn't all like a high-end mighty about people's place in the grand story when he killed that Balrog. Apparently, the Balrog didn't have a place-- - No. - In the ending that needed to be explored. He was like, "No, that bitch died." (both laughing) - Well, and I had forgotten that the movie leaves you guessing about Gandalf's fate. - And I love like, I love that because it worked. - It worked on Henry, 'cause when Gandalf falls, I was like, "Okay, just so he doesn't look at him, but make sure he knows I'm not." Don't let him know I'm looking at him. I looked at him, I was like, "Yeah, he's worried about Gandalf, he has this guy has no idea." - And what's funny is, all it would take is for me to show the literal first five minutes of the next movie, and he'll know. 'Cause the second movie opens with the battle with the Balrog. - I forgot about that, right? - Yeah, it's literally the first thing that happens. And, but I'm not gonna show him that because I want him to worry about Gandalf. I want him to know. - And MCU post credit, Gandalf will be bad. (both laughing) - There's not a whole lot more for me to say. I don't know about you guys. This is Lord of the Rings, everybody's fucking seen it. I don't know anyone that hasn't seen Fellowship of the Ring, at least Fellowship of the Ring. So, I can gush about it, but I've done that already. - It's great, yeah. - I loved it. I'm really glad I had an excuse to actually sit down and watch it again. - I was glad that it didn't feel the need to be ironic and make the Tadpog totals list. Like, I enjoyed it enough to not wanna stop watching it to make notes like that, 'cause I don't wanna make fun of it, 'cause it's not worthy of being made fun of at this point. Several awesome memes already came out of this movie, so I don't need to improve upon that. - Yeah, more on that later. - More on that later. - I'm gonna get to that in a minute, girl. - Same. - I was doing it and I was like, fuck, everyone's gonna do meme achievements, right? - We've been hosting this show a while together, Dave. - Yeah, all right, okay. Well, Phil, did you have anything more you wanted to add about the movie since you're, I know you're such a fan as well. - I could, Ock, for a while about this, but I think we're good. You know, this was a movie. So I read the book in late elementary, early middle school, which would have put me around 94, 95, so about four years after that is when the news starts coming out about it being filmed. And so like this really dominated the final two years of my high school. - Sure. - Just like trying to find more information on this and getting myself hyped up. And it's just one of the extremely rare circumstances where the hype and expectations like actually get realized, you know, we've got, we've all had, you know, regardless of who you are, we've all had situations where we're excited for something to come out and the final product is disappointing release and this is, you know, one of those rare occasions where it just from, from the moment of the opening credits to the end, it's just amazing from the start to finish. - And I think it's really cool for you that, you know, you read the books at such a formative time and then had the benefit of the movie version, such an excellent movie version coming out relatively soon, it would have been like if they had made the actual 100% awesome Gunslinger movie right after I had read the books, you know-- - They did, I don't understand. - Yeah, I mean then, I had to wait so long for the movie, 'cause it was so good. - I got you now, I understand it with you. I thought you were implying that the movie that we got wasn't good. - So I think that's great that you got it when you did for me, I'd ever read 'em in high school but I was a big, I was into Eddings, David Eddings, the Millorian and the Belgariad books. That was my Lord of the Rings and, but you know, again, that wouldn't exist if it hadn't been for talking in his work and these books and everything he did, it's insane. - Yeah, and also it's like, you know, talking about the Dark Tower, yeah, it's like, would we have anything like the Dark Tower? 'Cause like, King is like, so influenced by Tolkien and the Lord of the Rings and-- - And the Wizard of Oz. - Yep, speaking of wicked, right? God damn, it's like you take these two things and it's just boom, it's Kevin Bacon, right? It's the, you could connect just about everything I'm into back to either the Wizard of Oz or the Lord of the Rings, you know? - Or Barbara Broadcast. - Or Barbara, a lot of it's Barbara Broadcast, I'm gonna be honest with you, that changed my life in a good way, the best way. - Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun. - Dang. - Do you guys have another game? - A podcast down a bit. - What? You're gonna bring it down? - Let's bring this podcast down, yeah. - Oh, and talk about the game. Do we have anything from Brad? - We do, thank you. - You're welcome. - Brad writes, hello everyone. - Hello, Brad. - Hi, Brad. - My wife, daughter, and I got the Lord of the Ring extended edition movies on Blu-ray and watched them over the summer. - Hell yeah. - My only other time seeing them was on a 24-inch CRT-TV on a standard DVD in 2004. - The way it was meant to be experienced. - So that was a great experience. So he had only ever seen it in lo-fi CRT resolution 480. He's always watching it in Blu-ray, glorious 4K. - If he has those editions, he needs to go back and watch every single version of that with the different cast commentary 'cause there's like six different cast commentaries. - Wow. - With the four Hobbits, with the director, with like Aragorn. - Wow. - Like Lord. - There's just, there are so many different versions of this that you can just watch and listen to the people talk about it. It's great. - That's cool. - It's great, but God, you could spend a month just going through that. I mean, it's-- - Uh-huh, and I love it. - I love it. - Exactly. - Yeah. - I love that there's that much out there. - But to say, as like a college student, that does sound great. - 'Cause I mean, think of another franchise where you've got so much content to consume around that one thing. I mean, from the creators, - From the creators of the content. - Right, exactly. Anyway, Brad continues. Yes, the DVD player was built into the TV along with a VCR. God, if somebody has money-- - Wasn't that sweet ass-- - TV VCR DVD combo. - Wasn't that sweet ass Apex DVD player? - That's right, baby. - The one that I fucking love, that one fucker-- - The one that I'm playing to copy this. - Yeah, it's like, yo, I'll play anything you fucking throw at me. - Region free, honey. - Yep. - Right out of the box. - You just burn that? It's fine. - I love America. My new, my now wife's college TV was the shit, what can I say? I have never played the game, but sometime prior to July 1994, Lawrence of Arcadia at GamePro did. - That's a great name. - Lord of the Rings by Lawrence of Arcadia. It is a good name. Colkeem's novels are probably responsible for more role-playing games than any other works of fantasy. His legendary account of hobbits led to such enduring RPG staples as healing spells, charisma levels, and more. It's a shame that this wealth of tradition has been wasted on such a bad game. - Oh shit, just fired. - Next section titled "Bored of the Rings." - Whoa. - If you don't know the story of the one ring, don't bother unwraping this RPG's. But if you do know the story about Frodo's quest to destroy the Ring of Power, then you may wanna take a look just for sentimental reasons. Beware, this cheese does not get any less smelly. You begin the quest playing Frodo. A second player can join a Sam after you've found him. You must first find characters to control them. They're not selectable. Plug in a multiple player adapter, and five players will control other characters. If you can find five people to play this. - That might actually be easier, I think, than finding the characters in the game. - Right, exactly. - You walk through all the lands of the first book on your way to Rivendell. Unfortunately, most areas are long, indistinguishable romps. You possess a dagger and an old cloak. You can upgrade that to different daggers. Hobbits can carry only dagger. - Yeah, actually you start with an old dagger. - You start with an old dagger, and you can find leather armor. So that's kind of accurate. Or armors. If you control Aragon, you can find different swords, or if you're Gimli, the dwarf, different axes. There are no other weapons or items like Helms, Rings, or the Rings. - There is a ring. - There is a ring. - There is one ring. - The game would never let me use it. It's always like, "I got Gandalf said not to do that." They're like, "I'm about to die." I mean, he just put it on in the movie. - He did it in the fucking movie. - Which hadn't been made yet, but the book had been written. - That would be really cool if you could put the ring on, and then the ring rates do start coming to you. - Yeah, that would be cool. - That would be really fucking cool. - It's like punishment. - To pull back to Baldra's Gate 3, there are events that you can enact that will end the game prematurely if you do them. So, you know. - Did you end prematurely in the brothel? (laughing) - Come! - Okay, there are no other weapons or items like Helms, Rings, or Magical Items to find or use, which makes all the walking around seem pointless, just like in the books. Bad-- - Faithful adaptation, thank you very much. - It was, and hey, listen. The next section, bad habits are hard to break. - Oh, damn. - This guy's good. - That's a fucking achievement right there. - What the fuck? - I told you, I just are using the headers for these sections as my achievement. The graphics in this game are dismal. The sprites are minuscule. - Oh, fuck off. - Even for habits. And tedious backgrounds blend into one another after a while. The enemies are so small, they seem comical. The sounds are just slightly better than the graphics. The caves have an eerie wind whistling through them, and the music, though, on the cheerful carnival side, when you're outside, does change from scene to scene. The control in one player game is ridiculous. When you find another player, truth. He aimlessly wanders off. He is also vulnerable to the dangers of the game, so while you're searching for items, - He's starting to get the bones. - He's the blue plate special for the forest wolves. Next section, ring key dink. - Motherfucker, he did it again. - We got one, we got one. - Hardcore RPG player shouldn't touch this one with a 10 foot rune staff. There are no characteristics except hit points in experience levels, forget luck, dexterity, or other RPG complexities. Lord is lean on challenge as well. Getting through the areas is no problem. Enemies fly at you from all sides, but plenty of mushrooms, healing, and moss are around to help you out. This game should crawl back into whatever hobbit hole it crawled out of. - I have an idea. This is probably an off the mic kind of discussion, but I think it would be interesting to use the review that Brad sends in as a structure for conversation, where it's like you take, 'cause during this review, there's so many things where it's like, oh yeah, I wanna build on this. - It's a good idea. - You know where he's talking about-- - I don't know why we haven't done that before, actually. That's kind of a great idea. - Well, I mean, is your downer? - No, I don't. But see, the reason I'm thinking about it is, it's like, well, fuck, it's because I left my notes at home. - Oh, yeah, yeah. - And it's like, well, fuck, I have things, when he mentions the graphics, it's like, oh yeah, I kind of disagree with that, but also, sometimes when I walk behind a tree, I'm actually in front of it. Like, when the fucking windy shire, which I thought was cool, 'cause the trees are fucking blowing, and it's like, that looks neat. And then I walk what is supposed to be behind a tree, but my character is obviously, he's like, on top of it. So like, it looks like, instead of going back behind the windy tree, he's like, all of a sudden in the tree, like in the leaves, that wasn't good. So that was an example of bad graphics. - Yeah, and like you mentioned earlier, the bats. - Yeah, I can't see anything in the fucking cave. - 'Cause the cave's so dark, which is-- - Which is, it's a cave. - It's a cave, but also it's a video game, and I need to be able to see what I'm doing. - And I disagree with the like, I didn't feel like this game was easy, 'cause it's like-- - No, I didn't even-- - I felt like, okay, so there are definitely caverns under the shire that are mentioned in the books. That's like the main thing about the books, right? Is the caverns under the shire, because that's where I spent all my fucking time with this game, because I couldn't find my way out. - Nope. - Even with a mat. - Which are in the instruction manual, and it's like, I fucking followed the mat for point A to point B, and it's like, guess what? You just came out literally 20 steps down from where you entered on the overworld, and it's like, sweet, cool, so I guess I can go back down there? Fuckin' Pippin', turn the bones! What, I can't go back down there? (laughs) - Pippin' bones, it's also another steam name I've heard. (laughs) The graphics on this got a 2.5. - That's middling, right? - Sound got 3.0, control 2.5, and fun factor 2.5. - I'm surprised control got 2.5. The controls in this game are really super bad. - Yeah, they're bad, they're sloppy, they're hard to use. I gave up so quickly, because the first wolf killed me. I couldn't get it in the right angle, I didn't know it, I don't know. - Oh yeah, that's the fuckin' like, the combat in the game. Okay, so it's like, interplay, that's who developed and published this, in 1990. - '84, seven years before the movie. But it's like they were like, well, let's make Zelda. - Only Lord of the Rings. - Only Lord of the Rings. And they're like, yeah, that's a great idea. And they're like, you know, the combat in Zelda is pretty good. And they're like, yeah, it is. (laughs) And then it just kinda left it at that, because it's like the fuckin' like, boxes on the wolves, like anything in the game. It's like you have to be, in Zelda, it's like, every enemy is assigned a block. It's like, it's a tile. And it's like, as long as you hit that tile while the enemy's in that tile. - Unless there's a shield or something. - Right, unless they complicate it, right. On purpose, you hit. - Right. - That is not how this works. This is like a fuckin' pixel perfect, where it's like, well, yeah, if a wolf's in front of you and you swing in front of you, I mean, you're not gonna fuckin' hit it. - Right. (laughs) - What do you mean? Well, you gotta wait to the log side of the wolf. Yeah, but the wolf doesn't run to my side, yeah. - Hey, remember what we said about Zelda? Yeah, that was cool wasn't it. Anyway, we did it this way. - Yeah, it was garbage. - Yeah. - Not fun, the combat is not fun. In the bats, they're tiny. So it's like, yeah, you have to be with your dagger, you have to be lined up perfectly to hit it. But it's like, you're limited in how you can move. And it's also, the controls are awkward and clumsy. So it's like, and also, I'm playing his Frodo and Pippin's in the cave with me, and I'm like, oh, I gotta get this bat Pippin' and I can't move through him, he's blocking me. And it's like, well, fuckin' how the bat hits both of us. And now we're fun. - And he turns to bones. That's all he's good for. - It's boning. (laughs) - Pippin's good at boning. - I couldn't find a way to resurrect him, which makes, I guess that's lore accurate. - I'm sure. - Dead is dead. - Resurrection. - I don't-- - The mechanic in this game. - I don't know. I asked around the Shire, and no one was like, yo, where's Pippin'? (laughs) He was with you, and now he's not. - And so it goes. Let's have second breakfast. - Right. - The thing, this Zelda with Lord of the Rings would have been great if they stuck to that kind of thing. - Yeah, reskinned it. Reskin Zelda, or make it, and add a few little things here and there, we don't need fucking seven party members. I was watching the long play of this, and I skipped four Demoria, and there's fucking eight people on the screen. It's the fellowship. - An entire fellowship. - It's the entire-- - No more of me, right? - Almost. (laughs) - Almost. - And, of course, you fight the ball, Rock. (laughs) And beat him. - Hell yeah. - And then leave Mora, you know. And then they're like, then Aragorn is like, our quest was successful, but full of sorrow, and then they start talking about Gandalf being gone, you know, and it's just like, okay, fine. If you want me to be able to have multiple party members, let's limit it to like two or three tops, and just be able to select and put 'em in play. - Being able to select a character would be so much, so much better, and then like, the way the fucking multi-tap works is, whoever is connected to port three plays a Samwise. It's like, you don't select it. It's just like, that's fucking crazy. - It's assigned to a port, and that's dumb. This is absolutely possible. I want, you need to fight over who plays as Gimli. - Right, right, or Aragorn. - Right. - And, you know, you don't have, there's no like reason to pick one over the other, even if they did have a character select thing in your menu, where you could be like, okay, I wanna bring Gimli out. It wouldn't matter if you brought Gimli or Legolas or Aragorn. - My wife loves it when I say that. - Bring Gimli out, yeah, me too. (laughs) What do you do it? (laughs) - The, it wouldn't matter 'cause none of them have any special gifts or abilities. It's all just stab, stab, stab. - Dude, I can't imagine playing this with the full fellowship, because it's like-- - It's like nightmare. - With everybody blocking each other. Like, it's like, how do you, like even, and you can't even push through them. It's like, they're just, they're blocking you. It's like a fucking NPC walking around in a JRPG, or it's like, can you please move, I need to go buy items. - Yeah, it's, it's-- - It's clunky. - Yeah. - Clunky and bad, and I think it sucks because the potential was there. Zelda had been around for a long time at this point. They could have built something similar to it and done a much very memorable game that might have even, you know, warranted a SNES release of a volume two. - There are so many games that have done this style better. Like, what I thought was, you know, Secret of Mana, where you had NPC party members who were much, much better at reacting to the environment and you could actually go into a game and program them to be more aggressive or less aggressive. And, or something like, you know, Super, or Arena Nintendo had four different party members that you could switch and choose between from. And just like, these are what I feel like were basic mechanics at the time. - Right. - That were not implemented in this, where they desperately needed to, where you have eight players that you should be able to switch between at ease and-- - Here's, here's, here's-- - Here we are, it's 1994. They've got the license and the rights to create a video game based on the Lord of the Rings. The technology already exists. So many hundreds of good RPGs had been created up to this point. The story was literally written for you. You don't have to develop the characters, you don't have to come up with a plot. All you have to do is make a fun, good looking game that behaves like literally any other RPG out there. Take your pick. And then people will play it because it's Lord of the Rings. And they might say, oh wow, this was a lot of fun. I felt like I was playing the book. - I was surprised by how much like combat there actually was, like in combat that you do because it's like, it's like counter to the story. 'Cause it's like, there need, this in my opinion should, and I'd, Tyler would hate this. Sorry, buddy, but like this needed to be like a stealth game for a very long time. - Oh yeah. - And it's 'cause it's like-- - Like you put on the ring. - Or you just try to avoid enemies. - Avoid enemies, but you can use the ring at the peril of possibly, you know, it's like whenever you're in Nightmare on Elm Street when you would go into the dream world that a Freddy might attack and all right, you put on the ring but you run the risk of attracting the ring race. - Yeah, now you're fighting one. - You gotta fight one. - Which, you know, they-- - You get stabbed and now you're poisoned. - Now you're poisoned and then that's how they bring our win into the game. Come on, people, the story's been written. Let's do this. - Yeah, I feel like, I don't know, man. This to me would have worked a lot better and I know it's a little too early for it 'cause in 1994, this wasn't like a thing really, especially on consoles, but this would have worked a lot better I think is like a tactical RPG where it's like isometric, grid-based, you've got some units like the Hobbits that are good stealth units and can like backstab and stuff and then you've got your ranged fighter and you've got your front liners. I think something like that would have been a lot more fun and you could also like, I feel like better structure battles around the story or I mean, you kind of would have to pat it like they did in the movie. They'd have to like, well, here's battle here, battle here. I don't know, in my opinion, I think something like that would be like a lot more playable. - This was a rare occasion where a bad SNES game did have a somewhat of a redemption song much later when Lord of the Rings online came out and that's a pretty good game. It plays, it's a MMO, it plays like Warcraft, you know? - Yeah. - All that stuff in. - And the shadows of Mordor, like those games. - Yeah, those are good games. Like there's good content out there that people finally got the point and said, but it wasn't really until after the movies came out that developers started thinking, okay, now we've got, we can get the investors to give us enough money to make this a good game versus we're gonna, 'cause at the time, we're making an RPG on the Super Nintendo based on books that were written 35 years ago or, you know, whatever and, you know, not everyone was necessarily chomping at the bit for Lord of the Rings content until the movies came out and then you couldn't get enough. - And they put, like, they put this is based on a book like on Front Street, 'cause it's like the game fucking starts out and it's like, here's a book and it's gonna open and the pages are gonna turn. - Give a hoot. - Read a book. (laughing) (laughing) - What else have we got about this game? Anybody got any achievements? - I've got a few. - I'm working on them. - Oh, I do too. You wanna do dueling achievements? - Yeah, let's do dueling achievements. - All right. - While you pull it up, I wanna, we mentioned earlier, this was developed and published by Interplay. They're known for games such as the Bard's Tale, Battle Chess. - I love Battle Chess. - Me, too. Battle Chess is like a middle school type and classic. - Truly, yeah, yeah. - Wasteland, Fallout, and Fallout 2. - Okay, yeah. - Robocop versus the Terminator. - Great. - Booger Man, a pick and flick adventure. - Oh my God. - And Clay Fighter 2, Judgment Clay. - Judgment Clay. - Yeah, I started up with the good stuff. - Yeah. - And then worked my way down. - Work your way down. - Descending order. Were they not involved with Baldur's Gate 1 and 2? - So Bioware developed Baldur's Gate 1 and 2, they published it. - Okay, okay, thank you. - Mm-hmm. - They were, I mean, they've got like, if you go and look up Interplay on Wikipedia, there's like, I think 340 games. So like, this is a very like, they've picked these games from the list, yeah. (laughing) - All right, so here's the game for the achievements. - Yeah. - Dave's gonna start and he's gonna read his first achievement and if I have the same achievement-- (laughing) - I didn't cross that out. - If either one of us, no. If either one of us has the same achievement, we get to read those before he gets to continue reading his achievements. - Okay. - Okay. - I only have four. - I have four. - Five. - And two of mine have to be read what like-- - Oh, okay. - In sequential order. - Just fucking read your book. Read your achievement. No, this is better. - Read your achievements like we always do. - All right, first achievement. - It's just usually that I start. - Go for it. - No, you go. (laughing) I'm Tyler, you go. - Okay, all right. First achievement, one does not simply walk out of the shire. In order to unlock one does not simply walk out of the shire. You get lost in the men's cavern system under a hobbiton and get turned into bones by bats. - Easy to do. - Yeah, I unlocked that several times. - Yes. - Which leads me to my next achievement. To get back to where I was in the game, next achievement, I have no nonvolatile random access memory of this place. (laughing) In order to unlock, I have no nonvolatile random access memory of this place. You continue your journey by entering your 42 character password into the password screen. - God, I know. - I have got a story about that because I discovered on when I was playing this long, long ago that if you just randomly type things into the 42 characters and it'll come up with a password doesn't work, but then if you cycle through one character over and over again until you will find a password that is correct and it will put you randomly into the game with a random assortment of items in a random place. - That's awesome. - And I would progress in the game by doing that and just I would be outside of Rivendell with five party members and a bunch of items and I had no idea where the hell happened. - It's like the hangover. (laughing) - He was like, "Where the freak are the Rivendell?" "How did we get to go like this?" - Gimli. - We squeaked and then Gimli would turn into a pile of bones. - This game has some known glitches that very diligent patchers are working to fix. Like at one point, this was a year ago on Reddit, there was a thread about how certain codes that you get won't, like the code that you get before you go into Moira doesn't work. Moira doesn't work. And so apparently a lot of people were pissed because they would get their saved game. The game gives you the password and the password doesn't work. - It didn't work. And so there's some very diligent patchers out. Uh uh. (laughing) And my next achievement is uh uh uh. That's mine. (laughing) - Shit, there's some very diligent patchers out there trying to fix that. - That's as of a year ago. So there is a patched version of this game out there that fixes all of its glitches. - That's cool. - Doesn't necessarily make the gameplay or controls better but it fixes some of the things that are inherently wrong with the code. - I think it would be neat to like, it's funny, I love that you bring that up because as I was playing this game, I know nothing about ROM hacking or video game development. However, as I was playing it, I was thinking, man, I feel like this game is close to being good on like a lot of fronts. - Right. - But it needs some tweaking and it's like, I wonder if somebody could like ROM hack this game to make it go from a C minus to a B. (laughing) - Well, I think it has been done. So, if you're interested, check that out. - Continue with your achievements. - You know what, I want to continue with my achievements but Phil started talking about like his experience with like changing the password, like experimenting with that. I realized that Phil, I haven't asked you like, what is your history with this game? Did you like have this game like as a young man or did you buy it later in life or like, what's your history? - This would have been one of those like in the heyday of used Super Nintendo games for sale that were cheap. Like I got this at a game crazy location or I don't know how much, but certainly not what it's worth now. And it was one of those where I was like super excited, get to play a Super Nintendo version of Lord of the Rings of like my favorite IP. And then just, just, you know, presented with the-- (groaning) - Oh, part versus the space. I love the Simpsons. This would be great. - It would be like I'm playing the cartoon. I love the arcade game. Here we go, putting it in my ADS, okay. Power, okay, hmm. - It's kind of getting better, right? - I think the reason why I was listed amongst like in your list of people or this game was because it has such a profound, you know, impact on me of like this is an IP that you enjoy that was immensely disappointing. - Yeah. - And it's just why we do a lot of my-- - One of my first experiences in being really, really let down by a game that I was hoping would be more than what it was. - Yeah. - Oh yeah, that's it. I never, I did not, this wasn't a game that like I anticipated coming out. I don't think I ever recalled seeing a review in a game magazine like for like it for Chrono Trigger or something like that. - Well, there was one in 1994 Game Pro, June 1994. Lawrence of Arcadia. - I don't know, even more for boy at that point. So I think that's what I want to see. - Well, at least you were crushed in your like 20s and not your teens. - God. - Right, although this had to have been like before the movie came out because there's no way I'm going to see the movie and then go pick up a Super Nintendo cartridge in 2004 and be like, this is probably going to be really sweet. So this had to have been in that sweet spot between like '94 when it came out in 2001 when the movie was released. - Probably, like if you got it for cheap, I'm thinking this was after the PlayStation 1 and Final Fantasy 7 came out. - Yeah. - 'Cause I feel like Final Fantasy 7-- - '98 purchase. - Yeah, I feel like Final Fantasy 7 was the game where like a lot of people were like, oh yeah, I'm done with Super Nintendo. - In 2004, ever, you know. - I don't want to play with you anymore. (laughing) - Okay. - Okay, achievement unlocked. - Thank you. (laughing) - My next achievement is the fellowship at 100% in order to unlock the fellowship at 100% recruit Frodo Aragorn, Samwise, Pippen, Merry/Gimley and then something about Legolas and Ganolf, they also exist. - Right. - You don't get to play as Ganolf? - Nope, nope. - Which is like, that's a shame. - Wee! (laughing) - And then my next achievement is the fellowship at 99%. In order to unlock the fellowship at 99% have only Aragorn and Samwise in your party. - Hey! - Hey, Tyler, Tyler! - Tyler, welcome back. - Phil, we're hanging up, Tyler's back, bye. - See ya, man, it's been fun. (laughing) - When it beats me, I have to go now. - Get in here. (laughing) - I'm the poochy of this show now. - I'm not Louisville. - No, thank God you're not available. - No. - Yo, everything okay? - Yes. - Good. - Good news. - Yeah, I was not, I don't know if you probably, Josh probably said I was in here for various reasons. - Just said you were being a good dad. - You were being a good dad and that you're kidding. - Then you were at the ER. - You were sick and you were sick. - We figured people could probably, you know. - It figured out. It's pretty much the only reason I'm ever not eager. So, yeah, when Jack was presenting all the symptoms, went to the ER, had him checked out. He's the exact same virus that he had last time. - No. - But everything up. But it shunts fine. - Oh, well, that's good, that's good. - So it wasn't hiding anything. He was just looking exactly the same. - Okay. - So, I'll stay home with him tomorrow. - That's a fun riddle. - Get him better. Yeah. (laughing) - Is this a wait and see or a get an emergency rush? - Right. - Okay, well, we'll continue now where we left off. If that's okay. - Please do. - We're doing achievement. - We're almost done with the show. - We're almost done with the show. (laughing) - Sorry, did you have achievements today, Tyler? - No. - Okay, that's all right. - Did you like the video game? - Don't go to Louisville. Get that by, don't have to make your simple-- - Perfect, best achievement. Phil, you got some achievements for us? - The ring doesn't go to Mordor. (laughing) You don't have to take the broken shut to Louisville to try it. - Well, you can listen back to the show and see how we felt about it. - Okay. - When you're done. When I-- - Fuck this game, movie's okay. - Perfect. - We like, we love the movie and fuck this game. - Phil, achievements. - Yeah, a couple of them. My first one is, whoa, whoa, whoa. There's still plenty of mean on that boat. Now you take this home, throw it in a pot as a broth, but you gotta still go under that. And in order to get that, you let Mary or Pippen die and turn into a pile of hope. - Yes. It's very like ghosts and goblins, too. Like how they turn into the birds, yeah. - You're expected to play that little sound. - I was like really fucking shocked the first time it happened, 'cause I wasn't expecting like, it's not graphic, but it's shocking. - It's bones. It's like, the guy from the movie turns into bones. - So the snakes and the wolves. Everything turns to bones. - Yeah, that's true. - My next one is, the password is, F-8-2-0-3-K-I-B-2-0-G-2-E-O-2-W-W-4-W-Period, period, period, B-X-7-9-9-5-P-Y-9-A-9-1-P-M-Y-M-Y-2-W-P-Y-O-2-W-W-4-W-Period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period E, D, R, seven, F, Y, H, nine, E. And in order to get-- - Respect to the band. - Respect to the band. - Respect to the band. - That was awesome. - That was how we'd even go. And in order to get F. - Go ahead. - Input, password to start the game with all characters, rings, and gems, which I don't even know is actually true because four people up-voted it and 16 people down. (laughing) Actually correct, but yeah, the password system is shit in this game. My last one is, my disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined, and that's just play the game. - All right, awesome achievements. - Very good, I loved it, that one had me going. - That was great. - That was a good laugh. Mine aren't nearly as good, but I've got, my first achievement is fool of a tuck. And to get fool of a tuck, don't get pippin'. (laughing) Just don't get him. Leave him out of the party altogether. My next achievement is one does not simply, and to get, one does not simply walk into Mora. Moria, Moria. I can't say that one. - I think it's Overwatch. - It's, it's more of, it is. That's Mora from Overwatch is fuckin' me up saying Moria. My next achievement is fly you fools. And to get fly you fools, defeat the ballrog and escape Moria. And then my next achievement is, our quest has been successful, but filled with sorrow. (laughing) And to get, our quest has been successful, but filled with sorrow. Play the game and love it. Only to learn that volume two will never be coming out. At least not for the Super Nintendo. And then finally, my last achievement, you have my hacks. - Nice. - And to get what? - You have my hacks, play the game with cheat codes. - Nice. I got one more that I just came up with. - Okay. - So, you have chosen death (laughing) in order to unlock that, you just buy it. You just buy the game. - Buy the game? - You turn it on, and it pops up immediately. (laughing) - Welcome. - I was, I was trying to find an achievement for Ork from Mork, but I couldn't do it. - Oh shit. - Are there eggs in the game? If you find an egg and a man in a space suit comes out of it. - Rambo suspenders. - Yeah. - Does anyone say "nanu, nanu" at some point in the game? No? - No. - Well, I thought maybe Elvish, it would be an Elvish phrase, "nanu, nanu." - What if you kill yourself in the game? That could do it. - Yeah. - We'd do it. - I've got another one. - A multi-tap, do a podcast on Lord of the Rings with four hosts. - Hell yeah. - Yeah. - Just unlocked. - I tried to get John to come tonight so we would have had a full fellowship, but you couldn't make it. - Pumber. - Other guys here went out in his house. He had to go. - That's good. - He had to go meet the heater guy to fix his house here. Sorry, John. Hope that went okay. - Hell yeah. Me too. - He doesn't wanna think about Lord of the Rings anyway. - No, he's not very educated on the subject. - He has a great MMO for 30 years. - Nah. - That's how. - Okay, so, what do we do now? - If you were to buy this video game, how much do you think you would pay for it? We do this. - One. - Individually. - Three dollars and 32 cents. - Very specific, Phil. - 23.32. - Hmm. - Sauspiciously. Sauspiciously. - Sauspiciously. - 23. 32. - Sauspiciously palindromic. And exact. - Interesting. - Okay. Ian, what do you think? - 23. (laughing) 33. - Now we're just playing a game of what's the market like yesterday when I look this up. (laughing) - Tyler, what's that you? - $10. - Oh. - $10. - $10. - From Tyler. - 10. - Actual retail value of J, period, R, period, R, period, token, apostrophes, the Lord of the Rings, comma, Vol, period one, for the Super Nintendo, used on average, according to price charting, at the time of this recording, is $22. - $0.27. - Tyler, you got it. (laughing) You're over by a dollar. - What do you guys think Flopsy has to say about J, R, R tokens, the Lord of the Rings, volume one? - One and a half stars to half stars the music. Yep. - One and a half stars? - One and a half stars. - Okay. - I'm down. - I'm down to go low with that. 'Cause it is a one and a half star game. Even factoring in the generosity of Flopsy, they even, they can truly recognize a bad game when they see one. - I think they might go as high as two. But I'm good with one and a half. I feel like, I don't know, man, but it's like, that multi-tap might give them a half star. Because that is, honestly, it's kind of unheard of to have like five player RPG. - Yeah, that's a, that's a fair point. - It's fucking crazy. - I don't think that half star would come behind the one. I think you're right. I think it'd be closer to two. - But I'm still good with one and a half. - Given that feature, given that feature, I'm gonna vote two. - Two stars. - Two, have I converted everybody from the correct answer of one and a half to two? (laughing) - Yeah. - The dew to bides. - All right. - Very uncommon. - No. - Uncommon. - Uncommon. - I could see, I don't think this is a common game. - No. - It would be if the movies had been out. - Right. - And this had been made, but. - And based on the price too, that's kind of like, but see, the price is one of those where it's like, well, is it 23 bucks because of the movies? - Honestly, it seems kind of high because it's a shitty expensive game. - Yeah. - You know, usually-- - I feel like RPGs in general get a little bit of a bump. - Yeah, that's true. What's the value? You get so many hours of being under the shire for, I mean, so long. - How many hours? - Fighting bats and snakes. The destruction, I don't know what other enemies show up in the fucking game, but the instruction manual is like, monsters, bats, snakes, wolves. (laughing) - There's an orc in there from poor time. - And it's like, so I see like, I played this game and didn't even leave the fucking caves and I've seen 75% of the enemies in this video game. (laughing) - What do you think? What do you think about rarity? Where are we going on common, I think? - I like uncommon. - It's good. - Yep. - Okay, uncommon. Two stars, according to Flopsie, aka the ultimate Nintendo guide to the SNES library, 1991 through 1998, by Pat Contre, courtesy of Monster Mode Mike, and a shadowy mysterious benefactor. (mouse clicking) - Looney Tunes B-Ball. - Oh, nope. - That's supposed to be probably fun. - The Lord of the Rings, comma, vault one, parentheses, J.R.R. Tolkien's parentheses. - Parentheses, not a colon. - Just in Flopsie. - Oh yeah. It is two and a half stars. - Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. - I disagree. - A availability, comma on. - It's common. - It's common. - And two and a half stars. Well, well, well. - Oh yeah, I'm glad I read this. I didn't try this, but this game is compatible with the SNES mouse. If you thought it was already too difficult to control, wait a minute and plug in your SNES mouse. (laughing) - This game sounds like what we do. Give it all the functionality. All of 'em. - Every peripheral fucker works. - Oh fuck, fuck. - Super scope. Fuckin' those duper scope on it. - Oh shit, we got a ship. We got a ship this game and it sucks. What do we do? - Uh, man, a multi-tap, great, great. What else is there? What else? A mouse? - Yeah, yeah, fuck it. - Yeah, put it in the-- - Mouse will tap. - Put in the eye and eye code for the make the mouse work code. - Can we put a battery back up in it? Well, let's not go fucking crazy. (laughing) How about a short password system? You're fucking fired. This is Lord of the Rings. Nothing ever written about Lord of the Rings was short, including the passwords. (laughing) - All right. Gentlemen, are we done here? Tyler. - Yes, Dave. - If you were to give this game a beard, it sums up how you feel about it. What kind of beard would it be? - The only other beard that I'd recall on a pile of bones is in Home Alone 2 Lost in New York when Marv gets electrocuted in for a split second, you see a skeleton with a beard on it. - Nice. - I give it Marv's skeleton beard. - I like that. - Perfect. God, that's why you do this and not me. Tyler. - Yes, Dave. - Yeah, if you were to give this game a pair of glasses that sums up how you feel about it, what kind of glasses would you give it, and why? - I would give it, since I finished this series last night, the, my favorite monocle, the Coke bottle monocle jammed into the penguins. I suck it. - Yes. - God, glass. Two of those just smashed into your face. - Nice. - Penguin season one is fucking phenomenal. - Okay. - Hopefully should I finish it last night? Holy fucking shit. - It's done? - Yep. - Wow. - There may be a season two, but that's still like weighed on the road negotiations, but one is done and, significantly it's fucking great. - I'll put it on my list immediately. - How much do they pay him, do you know? Has that information been-- - He's executively produced it. So, imagine he paid himself a lot. - He paid himself a lot, yeah, yeah. Okay, cool. - Man, man, he's big with fucking evil, yes. - Yeah. - He's with his fucking evil shit. - You're still sad when the penguins do the funeral march and bring him into the-- - It's way more sad and grisly realism. (laughing) - I don't know how they're gonna do it season two. This fucking ping was a rocket stretch to the back. I saw him bring him into the water in the city. What are we gonna do? - Let's wrap. - We're gonna do a game next time? We're gonna know what we're gonna do. - Oh, yeah. I guess we would be Beauty and the Beast. - Yeah. - Cool. - Yep. - Cool. - Yeah, we'll do Beauty and the Beast. ♪ Beauty and the Lord ♪ - Thank you, thank you for being here, my steadfast. It's greatly appreciated. - I am, every year, your replacement Tyler. - Well, I mean, to clarify, Ian was a replacement Tyler. I was, so you were just Phil, which is great. - Yeah. - What Phil? - Well, thanks for filling in then. - Hey! - Oh! - Good filler. - Good filler. - Less kill, more Phil. - So next week, Beauty and the Beast, how do we close the show? - Hello, internet shit. - Hello! - Thank you. - Thanks for listening to everybody. - All the things we're gonna do, I think we're traveling that track, fill in the shows at tepper.com. So until next time-- - We talk about Patreon. - There's Patreon. - Patreon.com/dadvog. - Did you enjoy this? - Did you? - If you did, you have to give us a dollar. - Buy us this game. - Yeah. - We only need $77. - Well, I'm gonna see how many copies we can get. - Yeah, that's what I'm saying. - Right. - We need at least three. - And we need a lot more than three. Let's be honest. - Send 'em all. Phil, send us your copy. - No, no, no, no, no. Send us some money, we'll buy 'em. - Yeah, yeah. - We'll buy treasure. - Sorry, I knew that. - We'll buy 'em. - I knew that's what we were talking about. - I got a source. We're good, we're good. Don't waste your money. It's gonna be much more expensive if you buy 'em. - We get to buy the guy. - I know a guy. - I know a guy. - I got a guy. - He has a truck, we buy 'em in bulk. It's fine, just send the money for us only singularly one purpose is to buy Lord of the Rings cartridge, we promise. - That's our story. - That's a tadpaw guarantee. - Yeah. - You can stamp a guarantee right on that box. - Mm-hmm, only box copies. - And to give us the money, go to patreon.com/ tadpog and you could be given, you will be given access to our bonus content which is wide and varied content over the years. - But we're done doing it, just so you know. - You never do any more. - Just wanna be straightforward with you, we are done with that. - Still a value at a dollar, but we're never doing Patreon again. - Right. - 'Cause every time we do, donations drop off. - We're not gonna do it, actually, we're gonna wait. We're gonna wait until you decide to cancel and then we're gonna do it. It's gonna be a big hassle 'cause you'll be like, oh shit, they're talking about all the things I wanted 'em to talk about, so I guess I'll re-up. And then we're gonna fucking move the goal post and be like, you know what, now you gotta pay five bucks. - Yeah. - Yeah. (laughing) - So we do have a list of folks that donate $20 or more per month to the show. This is our list of executive producers and as a little bit of a treat. Every single week, I like to read these names out loud so these people feel special. - Mm-hmm. - Because they are special. We want to make sure they know how special they are. Then we're gonna read that list right now, starting with Cubicle Monkey, Gamebug Prime Nathan Eaton, Matt Gentile, AKA Gentle G, Pimball Airplane Archmage Chris Edler, sorry you couldn't be on this episode. Derek Pope Sandwich comes on his wife, Jeff Meiners. Congratulations on your marriage. - Do you mean Burger Bottom? - Burger Bottom, Jeff Meiners, congratulations on your marriage. - Hell yeah. - Drake Smith, Joey Webster, co-host, Avant Gard, Sandra's Pope, Phil Hawkins. Thanks again for joining us tonight. - Yes, thank you Phil. - He pays us to be here. Louisville correspondent, Princess Consuela Bananahamik, flavor trick, Taryn Dahl, Canadian Turbo Nerd, Turbo Nerd, Thomas, and Treft Ditri. And as always, thank you to Brad from Arizona for writing us a nice email and providing the GamePro article, which Tyler, by the way, we've decided that if Brad sends the email with the GamePro, we're gonna start using that as kind of a template for how we talk about the game. - Okay. - We'll interrupt the review with our opinions on the structure of the reviewers already set up for us. - Well, we're going to get a conch shell. - Love it. - And pass it a wrap. If you have the conch, you can interrupt. No, that's not fair. - I always have a conch, you always, that's my secret. - We all always have the conch. - My ADHD always has the conch. (laughing) - So that's it. Business concluded. Hands, hands, white. - That looks like fun, I'm gonna do it too. - Clean. - How do you guys want to close it out tonight? - As our favorite member of the Fellowship of the Ring. - Okay. - So until next time. - Triangle. - Capitol. - Capitol. - Capitol. - Are we all gimley? - We are all gimley. (laughing) - Bill, I didn't hear yours, was yours gimley as well. - I was a Bilbo being tempted by the Ring. (laughing) - Boo this man. He's done a number of the Fellowship. Boo this man. Boo. - All right. - I guess that's it. - Yeah. - Next week Beauty and the Beast. - Oh yeah. Looked you guys. - Yeah, that chapter. - Hi everybody. - Good to hear your voice, Tyler. Welcome back. - Thank you. - Thank you. (upbeat music) - Tadpog is hosted and produced by Tyler Holland, Dave Moore and Ian Chandler, and releases new episodes every Wednesday. You can find them on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, and just about anywhere else podcasts are hosted. If you have a question or comment for the hosts, don't hesitate to call us at 270-883-2555 and leave us a voicemail. If we like it, we'll play it on the show and respond. If you'd like to send us something, you can do so at Tadpog Studios. If you'd like to take care of Nicole Nance, V.O. Box 3785, Paduka Kentucky 4202. If you'd like to donate to the show, visit patreon.com/tadpog. And with a minimum donation of $1 per month, you will get access to all of our fun bonus content. Join the conversation on our Discord server at bit.ly/tadpogdiscour. Registration is free and we'd love to have you there. If you enjoy our show and haven't already, don't forget to find and tap that subscribe button so you don't miss anything. Thanks for listening and we'll see you next week. (upbeat music) - But don't. - I won't be able to record the audio, though, for the stinger. - Ian, if you don't stop sucking. - Ian, a two bratty co-hosts. - I don't want two daddies, I don't want two. - Don't want to stop sucking, daddy. Can't you record while it sucks? - I'm glad you that isolated. I don't use ringtones, but I'm going to make an exception. (all laughing) - Bring us the tadpog sound board, yes. - You know what, I've been-- - I haven't changed from crazy frog in 25 years, but it's the new one. - But can you imagine the fucking, you remember the commercials when we were in college for like, you pay for ring dust. You imagine if that's like, we should do a fake commercial and they're all those and then we add what Ian just did. (all laughing) - I'm changing mine from-- - De de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de de. - A hamster one, what was it called? - A hamster dance. - A hamster dance. - A hamster dance. - A hamster dance. - Thank you. - Change it to, yeah, daddy. - Yeah, daddy. (all laughing) - I don't want to stop sucking. - The name of this ringtone's funny, baby. I don't, like, early 2000s doesn't know how to handle that ringtone. - It breaks, it breaks. - A hungry baby, yeah. - It's like, look man, we just saw the Paris Hilton sex tape. - That's like as far as we go, we don't know. (all laughing) We don't know what you motherfuckers are up to in 24 years or now. - Phil just sent me-- - You're fucking your cousins! Who's stuck in washing machines? What is wrong with you? (all laughing) - The future is dark, so dark. I'm killing myself now. - Phil just sent me crazy frock original ringtone in version one, Jamster advert. - I wonder if the audio will come through if I play it. Only one way to find out. - Do it! - Oh, for God's sake. - Watching the video, he's got a penis. (upbeat music) (all laughing) ♪ Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding ♪ - Hell yes. Hell yeah. (all laughing) - I'm gonna put this on my phone. (all laughing) - All right. - It came through. - I'm sorry, I would try to audio adjust that and post. - Fuck it, it's a stinger. We don't do shit. - The beginning, it's gonna blow people's fucking speakers out if I don't, we'll mute that a little bit. High school Josh's, high school Josh dance his screen saver the entire time I knew him was the dancing baby in his family. (all laughing) Like, I bet it still is if I were to go to Rodmane's house right now. - What were you gonna tell us about? - All this is going on this stinger, but. - As soon as you pull up in the hospital, Jack knows what it is. He gets upset, he's like, fuck this place again. So he, he grit and bears all the procedures, he cries, but you know, he gets his blood drawn. Does everything he has to do? He gets back to the CT, you know, he of course doesn't want to do it, but you know, I'll put him in the machine. He doesn't really fuss, but he's crying and they're, you know, trying to hit his head stable. And they start lowering him back in there, you know, just to get a few pictures, you're doing good. As soon as we say pictures, he's looking at me, he's crying and he just, (all laughing) - Gee, he's, like he's stressed out and he's crying, but he hears pictures. - I call that breaks my fucking heart. - Gee, he's, you're doing good, Jack, Jack. - Uh huh, gee, he says cheese for like four minutes straight. That's the way pulling back out of the machine. It's like, good job, buddy. - Oh boy. - And Kevin, I kept him sitter and say, geez. - Good boy, Jack, I'm so sorry. You're so tough, buddy. - How old is Jack? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - He's five. - Okay. - It's a lot for a 12 year old. - Turn five in January. - Is there any pictures, so I am like completely unfamiliar with the general like scope of where he is at in his life, so. - He, he looked, yeah, he looks to be a, like a regular, he's a little, boy, he's a little smaller. A little smaller, he looked, you'd probably think he was like three, but he's five. Yeah, but he's getting there. He's catching up bit by bit. - He's a sweetie. He's a good kid. - Yep, yep. - Love that boy. - Good boy. - Glad he's doing better. I'm sorry that he's sick. - Yeah, but I'm glad it wasn't the show. - I'm glad it wasn't like the show. - Yeah, no, oh my God. - Yeah. - All right, see y'all next week. Believe it!