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In four weeks, the typical Noom user can expect to lose one to two pounds per week. The results may vary. Live from our studios in Austin, Texas, this is Drinking Bros. Fate News with Ross Patterson, Dan Holloway, Papa G with the traffic. "How do you feel?" "Good." "Yeah." "Field reporter, Hot Boss." "And Delco Dan with Sports." "Welcome to Fate News." "Yeah, welcome to Drinking Bros. Fate News, everybody, bringing you the real and spankest news of the week. Remember, you see the papers in the beginning, dude? "Yeah, but then everybody discovered that you can't read," so it became a moot point at that stage in the show. Speaking of shit we used to do, we used to elect real people to president. Bob, can you go ahead and go to Drinking Bros.com, please? "What do we got there? What do we got there today? This is going to be a fun day today." "It's going to be if I'm fucking angry just being alive right now. Go ahead and click on that shirt." "Oh, yeah, is this the best one we've ever made?" It might be, yeah. Click through the colors, too, because it comes in a number of different colors, just like Americans. "Convicted felon 24." "Yeah, blue." "Look at that, dude." "Great." "Let's fucking go." "All kinds of stuff." "I'm drinking bro. I'm going right now." "Yeah." "Look at that." "Oh, the green is nice." "The green is nice." "It really makes my eyes pop." "Sure does." "Sure does, too." "Cheers to you." "Absolutely." "Cheers to you guys. We've been talking about WeFunder.com/hardafseltzer all week. We're over $200,000 already, and we said, "Look, we're going to use all the money to open up new states." So with that, we're going to open up three new states. I have a call with one of the states at 10 a.m. on Monday. The second state's at 11 a.m. on Monday, and then one, we've kind of been in the works with for a little bit. So we should be getting you those three states by the fall. You guys actually own the company, so we've locked off 10% of the company for you guys, so if you donate, not only do you own it, but we'll also get it to all 50 states faster, which is what is happening now. So that's super exciting, and it's weird states. Some of you guys have requested some weird states that we're definitely not on the list, and I was like, "All right." "What do you mean by a weird state?" Just a state that you wouldn't normally think of right off the top of your head. I know. Yes. I know. Oh. I mean, I'm just guessing. Are you serious? Yeah. You didn't over hear me? Fuck God. No, I don't listen to anything you say. Yeah, yeah. I know. I was one of them. I mean, I wouldn't recommend it listening to this asshole. I know. I know. I know it was one of my upcoming season with I know on Monday. So yeah, for whatever reason, everybody kept saying I know. I've never been. I've never been to Idaho. I mean, I wouldn't recommend it. I know. It looks beautiful. Yeah. It's beautiful. So Evan's got a company there called... He's always had that company. I think it's called... He's had it for a long time. Idaho River Adventures or something like that, and it's something near the Salmon River, I think, and they take you out on boats and then fly fishing, expeditions, like that's pretty fun. Okay. And one of our good buddies lives there too. Yeah. Dan Cummins. Dan Cummins. Is it Coeur d'Alene? Coeur d'Alene. Yeah. Coeur d'Alene. Yeah. He's lived there for fucking a while. A bunch of people have, and they say it's beautiful, and they rage, and they party in everything else. So I was like, yeah, for whatever reason, we just kept getting that in the DMs. And I was like, all right, man, yeah, let's do Idaho. So yeah, I've got a call with him on Monday, and then we'll start shipping away at these states. Go to weafunder.com/hardafseltzer, you actually get to own the company. So that way you have ownership in it, and then hopefully you can post it, and you can drag. There's one guy who donated today, and he goes, hey, not only am I an owner and a Seltzer company, but I'm also forklift certified. So fuck off. I mean, you don't tell me what to do is what he said. If you can't get laid with those two things, then you may as well just end it now. Totally. You know, we cut your dick off, donated to science, and also we're using the money to hire listeners. Black rifle coffee did this back in the day. We're doing that as well. Ryan Mills was actually one of our listeners in the state of Texas, and then he came by and was like, hey, I would love to work with you guys. And do it. Nobody knows the brand and us better than you. So it would be awesome. Speaking of Ryan Mills, you know that piece of shit was today? He was in fucking Padre. Padre, dude. Working or? Yeah. Well, I mean, allegedly working. So he said, because I just got a text message from him, he said, tell everybody to go to Driftwood on South Padre Island and ask for Kim. She'll hook you up, and they got hard AF Seltzer there down in Padre. Oh, so it's not like he's raging. It's not like he wrote it on the wall of a bathroom stall for a good time, call Kim. She's giving people product, not correct. Yes, not ahead. Yeah. Well, I don't know. I don't know Kim. We'll see. I don't know Kim. He's also, he goes, hey, dude, just let everybody know I wasn't just partying there. And this is genius. So he said, hey, I just opened up the HEV and Eagle Pass. Should we have people go in and just give it out to migrants? We could, yeah. - Well, it's a little, it's a mason, a mason, a mason, a mason, or we could give it to Border Patrol, who are actual Americans. - That, but also, would it be shocking as a migrant, if you cross, like right through that fucking cage, right where the fence is open there, you just swam across the river, got through the fucking wire, and then somebody handed you an 8%, would you black out immediately, like, what would happen? - That I don't know, 'cause they probably are quite dehydrated. But I'm trying to make it there. But I don't think it would be more surprising than getting a $5,000 gift card from the country you're invading. - True. - 'Cause that's new, right? - Right. - It's like, can you imagine the Trojan horse, they cracked that thing open and all these dudes pour out, and they're like, hey, let me stop it right there, guys, does anybody want, we got some in and out over here, we got Chick-fil-A on the other side, no, fire, that's how you deal with that situation, you set them on fire. - Man, but it was, we've done ho-bo-tizing, I think illegal immigrant advertising would be great. - Yeah, we may as well. - Kingsville, HEB, Uvaldi, HEB, B&J Pizza, and Corpus Christi, the VFW 8967 in Port Aransas. So down in Port A, at the VFW, they're serving it up there, hard AF Seltzer Island markets in South Padre. Wilmington, North Carolina is in the Ivy in the alley downtown, which is one of my personal favorite bars we used to go to all the time. Eagles Dare in Wilmington, North Carolina, Gourmet Markets in Dempsey, Quikmart, in Wilmington, North Carolina. Enjoy some hard AF Seltzer summers here, people are partying, and I fucking love it. I love that he got to go down to Padre. I'm gonna head down there for Fourth of July, and meet up with one of our distributors down there, and say hello, 'cause I've never been, I've seen the T-shirts all over Texas, let's Padre. So I think that would be a fun time there, and I'll take the kids. - Is it a kid's place? I mean, they ended spring break there, right? They don't do spring break. - That was PCB. That was Panama City Beach in Florida. Padre absolutely still does spring break. - But it's not, look, it's not spring break. - No, no, no, no, but it is the Fourth of July, so it's probably not the best place to take kids. - I think it's a little ratchet down there. I would-- - Doesn't-- - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - But fuck it, man. What are your kids, cowards? - They're not cowards, so they're not. - I mean, I've seen people wheeling their kids through fucking the French Quarter and Mardi Gras, like it's-- - Yeah, yeah. - I'm down, 'cause Port A, Port of Rans is fucking rages, dude, so, but the kids had a great time there, so fuck it, yeah, let's go, dude. Let's go. The top story today, Bob, do you have the video of this? This is getting bleak here. - I think you want the first one. - I sure do, and then you can show the second one after it, but man, we talked about this yesterday, and I know the Washington Post ran an article of people that talking about Biden's decline here. It gets even worse. Biden poops his pants in France, okay? He stormed the porcelain in Normandy. He beach the dump over there. In his pants, President Biden's cognitive performance is once again, being thrust into the spotlight following a new report from the Wall Street Journal about the 81-year-old is showing signs of slowing down during private meetings. Many Republicans and some Democrats that the president showed his age in these settings, according to the journal, citing conversations with 45 lawmakers and administration officials about the president's mental performance. White House officials are dismissing many of the accounts, but here are five of the president's recent gaffes. Now, we told you we were gonna chat about this today, and then this fucking video popped up. We should probably lead with this before we get into the other gaffes here. 'Cause this was earlier this morning. It is the 80th anniversary of D-Day, and President Joe Biden is over there with the president of France, and Bob, you can play the video here. Is there audio? No. Shaking the president's hand, and then he goes to, is he sitting down, or is he just shitting his pants? There's a chair behind him. You can see the chair. Like all four of them have chairs. Now, to be fair, he may be establishing dominance over the Frenchman to his right. Macron, he's a cunt, right? Oh, I'm sorry, I already said French. But it looks like he might be dumping out. You know, usually at the end of a president's term, they take on some cause, right? So Habitat for Humanity, from Carter, and then Reagan was in dementia, right? So I don't know what he did. Yeah, because the last four years of Reagan was shot. He was gone. Clinton and Bush, senior, they had a fucking charity thing as well, and then they started the Clinton Global Initiative afterwards. Bush, Jr., farted at bathtubs and painted dogs, right, and giggled. And then Obama wrote books. Like they all do something afterwards to make money or whatever. Okay. I feel like Biden's best option is to get a sponsorship with adult diapers or something. I agree. He's, he may have shit his pants in more countries than any other human being in the history of the world. Well, let's examine this. It has definitely been to a lot of places. Yeah. Right. Oh, you're right. And other countries don't have leaders, one that travel like the American president do, and two that are old enough to shit their pants. Yes. Right. So I think there's a really good chance that he's shit himself in more countries than any person in the history of the world. So I think he's got to be up there. Other than Pope John Paul II. He's the only other one. Pope Pope, and baby Benedict II, he had to retire. Yeah, but I don't know. Benedict didn't have the, the staying power. He was only around a couple of years. JP2 was ancient for like a decade, decade and a half. He dumped out in every fucking country probably, right? Probably. I mean, how to, as soon as you said it, like my mind immediately went to, he's wearing white everywhere all the time, man. That's so hard. Oh, no, I mean, but the diapers are solid, right? Like if there's one thing we know about Roman Catholics, typed up. Oh, yeah. Right. Absolutely. And one of the causes is being elderly, right? The other cause is a lack of general rectal integrity. Correct. Mm-hmm. And I'll give you a little Catholic hack here. When we had a, we knew we were going to have a longer mass, like the Saturday, Easter mass, stuff like that. Stations of the cross last forever. You will, the altar boys will put an adult sleep diaper on the priest to, 'cause they have a little more staying power than the normal. Sorry, you said the altar boys do that. Yep. Part of the mass. Well, it's part of the mass. We have a job to do. That's what Bob did. Now, is there music playing when you do that? Or is it pre-music pre-candy? Oh. Al Green, sometimes I guess. Oh, man. Oh, boy. Yep. All right. I would have preferred to hear that choir, that old choir. Or Bill Withers. Just the two of us, if you're lifting his old nutsack up. Let's examine this like the, there's a brooder tape here. Let's play this again, Bob, and, and let's see here. So I don't see the chairs. They're right there. Right there. Right here, right here, right here. Okay, they're just kind of blended in there. Yeah, they're like granny. All right, so that was part of the debate. So play it, play it now from the top. All right, so he's shaking, is that Hunter Biden? Well, that's Macron. That's Macron, okay. He's at least farted on Macron. He's at least cropped dusting all the fucking World War II veterans behind him, which to be fair, there's a lot of shitty diapers in that audience. So, well, yes. But, and that's probably what Biden was thinking. He's like, nobody's going to know it. Look at all these people. No one's going to know that it's me that has the poopy diaper. Yes. And then as this keeps going, Jill puts her hand over her mouth and kind of whispers something here. - Yeah, it's hey, you shit yourself. Make sure you don't sit directly in it. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. - Oh, man. - Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh By the way, the funny thing is, is that the two wives look like sisters except Macron is like 40 years younger than Biden. - Yeah, yeah, now find the other footage there, Bob, of when he walks off stage, because everybody was wondering why he got the fuck out of there, which I couldn't figure out without shaking everybody's hands. - Well, no one really ever knows what he's doing. - No, I mean, he just kind of wanders around. - So play this one here real quick. - This one here is the one. - He's walking pretty gingerly there, so you can tell that that that pipe is filled at that point. Now, homegirl goes sprinting off here. Something else was supposed to happen because a guy takes off running. - Is that Macron again? - Yeah, that's Macron. - Okay, so he's going to shake everybody's hands because he doesn't know what the fuck's going on here. Because all of this seems very weird and rushed and nobody understands what's happening here. Quick kisses to the guys and then boom, he's out of there. So I'm my thought process here, and this is what the internet is speculating today, because Biden pooping, his pants was trending all day, pooping, and then Macron here was trending. It looked like he had to improv this at the end and kind of run back for all of this shit. So good on him, but where the fuck he's going these days and what he's doing and racing him in and out of these places based on his bathroom schedule and his own pants is very, very odd to me, and it certainly doesn't help the narrative of the article that came out yesterday from the Wall Street Journal. - Yeah, the article which is, it's funny that the article itself is being criticized and Ted Lu who's a congressman, sort of. - I fucking hate Ted Lu. - This morning I was like, did you guys not see the State of the Union address and you still are pushing this fake narrative that Biden's in mental decline? Like, yeah, we saw that he was cracked the fuck out on Adderall with penned pupils. Are you fucking kidding me? That's your evidence that his face was stretched back? Like, he'd been awake for two weeks? Sorry, but we don't buy that shit. - I'll commend him though for that for getting through it. Whatever that fucking cocktail was that they gave him to even get through that goddamn thing was pretty fucking shocking, but one thing you can't stop is your bowels from shitting your own pants. - Well, you can. I mean, I think maybe we need a presidential butt plug. - You think so? - With a valve on it or something. - Okay. - 'Cause he's a leaker at this point, Bob. - Is he a leaker or a pusher? - What is by these days? - Oh, he's leaking, certainly. - Yeah, he's leaking. So maybe get that Play-Doh fun factory set and just thread his asshole 'cause it's probably prolapsed anyways. - Do you want a star on it or do you want it to kind of like a spaghetti strainer? - I'd like a star personally for mine, but I think for him, since he's a leaker, you're going to have to go with something not a star that's not going to work. - Now, Bob, what's that? - Now, again, first date is across. - This is the-- - Oh, boy. - This is what we call the rectory door stopper. - Yeah, we're going to hell today, guys. - No chance at all that rectory has something to do with rectum or how does that work? - I don't speak Latin, I don't know. - I don't know. - I don't kill them. - Oh, yeah. Don't speak Latin, never will. - No, hold on. Can you zoom in a little bit on that? What is it that's coming? I know that beads are the prayer beads are attached to the rosaries attached to it. What is the object coming out of the back of the butt plug there? - It's a crucifix. - That's attached to the rosaries. - That's a great way to get it in, though. If you're stuffing one of those in an asshole, which among us hasn't at this point, that's a great fucking grip. - I feel like-- - I feel like-- - Let's say I had cancer, prostate cancer, and you shoved that in me. Am I healed or no? - Immediately, no. I would give it 14 to 18 times. I would do it. - I eat. - Damn that in there. - It certainly depends on the relic that you put inside of it. Now, our church just had a finger bone of St. Anthony, certainly a first-year relic, but you get a piece of the true cross in there. - Oh, boy. - Well, who's the patron saint of buttholes? - I can find that. - Yeah, let's go ahead and look that up, because this is the show now. - I think it's-- - We're a Catholic show now. [chuckles] - I was gonna say St. Peter, but that it would have felt wrong, and I'm glad I didn't. - Peter is a gay-sounding man. - Well, it's just a Peter going to the asshole. - We were talking about this earlier, by the way. Lauren Manley's husband's name is Chris, but she insists on calling him Christopher. Do you know any other adult man that goes by Christopher? - No, but I know a lot of moms who-- Like, I grew up with Chris, and she was like, "It's Christopher, calm Christopher." And it was relentless. - Yeah. - So that is a thing for women, and I don't really know why with him. I think she's doing it as a power move over him, but if it's your mom saying it to you, calling you Christopher over Chris, then yes. - So you're saying that her-- - You remember the supposed-- - Your husband is a power bottom, then. - Yeah. - Okay. - Yeah. - That's exactly what I'm saying. Sorry. - Well, I guess that raises another question. Can you be a power bottom in a straight relationship? - No. - Like, you prefer the woman to be on top. - Dom's up. - You can have that in a straight relationship. - Well, you prefer the woman-- - You're getting the waiter in something. - No, you prefer the woman to be on top, I think, is what that would be. - No, no, no. - By the way. - Whenever the woman does the Amazon position, that's when-- - No, that's not right, because the man's not empowered right there. - That's what I'm saying. He's a bottom. - He's a bottom? - Yeah, but he's not a power bottom. That's not the question I ask if you could be a bottom. - Oh, got it. - You could definitely be a bottom with a woman. You just get pegged all the time. - You can generate some power from the Amazon position, I think. - But the power is not about-- in power bottom, it's not about generating power. - It's in your mind. - It's about you're the Dom, but you're getting drilled. - Yeah, it's all mental power at that point, dude. I understand that. - Like Professor Xavier, for example. So Patrick Stewart. - Yeah. - In the wheelchair? - Or James, whatever the fuck, McAvoy, depending on which timeline you're in. - Yeah, either one. - Now, I don't really care. - Let's go back to the buttholes. - Yeah, so the patron saint of bowel disorders. - Oh, man. - Is there really one really-- - Is there really a thing in the Catholic religion? - Yeah, the patron saint of bowel disorders. You've heard this name before. - They've run out of stuff, dude. - Okay. - Because if you're a fan of March Madness, you know the name Saint Bonaventure. - Oh, shit, the Bonnie's. - Can you imagine-- - Wow. - If somebody out there in the audience in the fucking thousands and thousands of people that watch this show, one of them or their child is either at or a graduate of Saint Bonaventure, and you just found out that he's the patron saint of assholes. - Yeah. And then you're screaming, "Go, Bonnie's at the game." - Man, they got a change. Pull up Saint Bonaventure's logo for their sports team. By the way, what is-- - It's a little dude, right? It's a little Catholic, dude. - What's the team name? What's the-- - It's the Bonnie's. - It is the Saint Bonaventure Bonnie's. - Yeah, I know the team. I know the logo, pop it up. - The logo is-- - Yeah, we are really uncovering some stuff right now. - Oh, I think they changed it. This is a new logo. - Yeah, find an older logo. - Yeah, I've never seen that one. - Does it look like an asshole? - Yeah. - Wait, what is a Bonnie? Is it some kind of wolf? - It was a religious thing, I believe, back in the day, and then they changed it. - Yeah, I think that's just what they called themselves. It also could have been the type of thing where they were like the Saint Bonaventure savages for 60 years and then went up. - Exactly. - We gotta change it. - Yeah, asshole savages. What, I'm stating the obvious, okay? You gotta fucking bergal that ass. - So their mascot-- - Is? - Why the wolf, the mascot has ties to the Franciscan tradition. That friars of the school live upon. So I guess there's some kind of-- - I saw that's what it was. I remember them being a friars. - Yeah, I remember it being a friar, Bob. - That's Providence. - Providence Friars, shit. - Yeah, but the friar order has something to do with wolves. I'm not familiar with that. - I've made it, but-- - So. - Okay. - Either way, if you're a Saint Bonaventure grad, just know that it was all about buttholes. - And the reason why we're talking about this is because Joe Biden is a Catholic-- - And he should have done it the United States. - Yeah. - And he's-- - Repeating himself. - Like these can't stop shit himself. - Well, so you would if you shit your pants all the time if you're incontinent. Well, actually, there might be a patron saying incontinence too, I'll look that up. - Yeah, I'll find that out right now. And also, if you could look up-- Some people in the chat are asking about the Amazon position. Delco answered it, but I feel like we need a graphic demonstration, not-- - We've seen it before. - We've seen it. - There's a nice little stick figure drawing. We can't show two humans doing it. - Certainly not, well, I mean, if they're clothed, we can. - No, but people on Twitter all the time showed the just two cartoons. - Correct. - And I think we're okay to show that cartoon to the Amazon position today. - As long as there's no penny on there, yeah. - Oh, these are a lot of, these are blurred, I don't know. That is, we're playing with fire. - You think so? - It's a drawing. - Yeah, that's probably fine, it's a cartoon. - It's on anyway, who cares? - So that's-- - Was it? Okay. - That's it, right there, folks, so, question-- - You're shutting this channel down, go to WeFunder.com/hardAofSeltzerDay, holy shit. - So I don't think there's a patron saint of incontinence specifically, but St. Vitalis of Assisi is the patron saint of bladder and genital diseases. So if you have herpes, he sees the patron saint of that. - You know what, we're gonna pivot. - Yeah. - Yeah. - I found an article called the 10 most bizarre patron saints in Catholicism. - Okay. - You guys ready? - Good. - St. Rita, the patron saint of impossible feats, that's stupid. - If it was margaritas, that would've been dope. - St. Julian murdered turned saint. - Okay. - I don't understand, this isn't funny. - Yeah. - St. Lidwina, the ice skater. She's the patron saint of ice skating. That's fucking stupid. St. Elmo's fire, obviously. None of these are funny, we're no longer pivoting. - Okay, good. - Look, the only thing you need to know is who the patron saint of prostitutes is. - Well, the patron saint of fireworks is St. Barbara. - Well, the patron saint of prostitutes is of course St. Nick, Santa Claus. - Is it really? - That's old St. Nick. - Is the patron saint-- - Was he dipping in the whores or what? - Well, he saved women from becoming prostitutes. - Yeah, his origin story, he gave them, put money in their stockings or whatever, so they wouldn't have to whore themselves. - Oh, sweet. So all of you, only fans, girls out there, maybe you should turn to Santa Claus. - Yeah. - And stop ruining your life. St. Isadore of Seville, patron saint of the internet. He was born in 560 AD. So that makes sense. - No, it does, they had it back then. - St. Drogo, patron saint of unattractive people. A lot of you need to talk to that guy as well. - Yeah, there's a bunch of ogos out there. - A lot of ogos, St. Genesius of Rome, patron saint of comedians. - Ah, all right. - We just had our first millennial saint. - Oh, who was it? - They just, the Catholic church just, you know, put them in. - Was it a gay dude? - No, he died of like cancer. - Trans. - Trans. - What's it, we gotta pick 'em up? - We gotta pick 'em up. - Carlos Acutus. - Come on, man. (speaks in foreign language) - What, the fuck? And they got him in the car? He's dead, right? - Yeah, he's dead. - Yeah, they put him on his way. - Son of a bitch. - Saint Jesus Malverde, which means bad green, maybe? - It does, yeah. - patron saint of drug dealers, and it's weird that he's Mexican. - It's just a coincidence. - In all honesty, Saint Jesus, Malverde is not officially recognized, Saint by the Vatican, but he's a folk hero in Mexico. - Okay. - Now, Biden isn't really a folk hero here, and White House officials are noticing, well, they're noticing a lot of gas here behind the scenes, allegedly, because they're the ones that were the sources behind these leaks to the Wall Street Journal. President Biden said at a rose garden events celebrating Jewish American Heritage Month in May that American-Israeli Hirsch Goldberg Poland, who was currently being held captive by Hamas, was in attendance. You don't say. - Yeah, I mean, remember that one. - He also said that his uncle got eaten by cannibals we talked about. - That one I saw, did you see the, who was on a hot mic the other day? Was it? - Yeah, one of the centers. - What'd they say, just like, what the fuck? - No, she walked off, it was a woman, and she walked off the stage, and she goes, well, yeah. - Joni Ernst. - Joni Ernst, play this to the crowd. This is another one. After Biden said his. - Bottom line, never trust a man, whose uncle was eaten by cannibals. - Sorry, what she said. - So she said, bottom line, never trust a man whose uncle was eaten by cannibals. - That's pretty funny. - It's really funny. - I mean, that's obviously a joke. She's not being serious. - Well, she just walked off the stage saying it. If you're saying it that casual, I don't know who Joni Ernst is, but she's got to be funny in real life. - She's a repubed, she was a. - I don't know anything about her. - She was in the army, what does she do? - Senator from Iowa. - She was like, I don't know, she was an army officer, I can't remember what she did. - Oh, that's funny, man. - Or maybe she was National Guard. - If she's that sly about it, then she chances are she's pretty funny in real life. The next one up was, this is my administration was working around the clock to free the remaining hostages there, just as we've freed the hostages already. And today, here with us is Hirsch Goldberg Poland. - So that was that statement. - He also said that he was vice president during COVID, during the initial part of COVID. - Yes. - That's obviously not the case. - What else do you see? I see an economy that grows from the middle out and bottom up with a wealthy pay their fair share. So we can have children paid leave and so much more and still reduce the federal deficit and increase economic growth. Folks, imagine what we can do next for more years pause. So we all remember that. We've got a T-shirt that says pause. - Yeah, we've got a pause T-shirt for him. He said some dumb shit at G7. I mean, look, presidents make gaps. If you talk in public enough, I think I did the math for us. If 1% of the shit we say is dumb, we say like seven minutes worth of dumb shit a month. Which is a lot, right? - You and I? - Yeah. - Oh, more than that. Definitely, we eclipse that. I'm just saying-- - We eclipse that in the first 20 minutes of this show. - Even if it's only 1% of what we say, though, it would be seven minutes a month worth of, which is years of this. - Sure. - Now, so you can make a full documentary just on dumb shit. So I mean, look. But there's a limit. You can't say that you fucking did a bunch of stuff you didn't do. You can't say that your uncle was killed by cannibals for Christ's sake. - Can you? - I don't know any more. - No. - I don't know any more, dude. I really don't. It feels like everybody's fine with this. - Only if you're a Rockefeller. - That's true. - Wait, did he get eaten by cannibals? - There was a Rockefeller who was eaten by cannibals in the '60s. - That is true. - Fuck 'em. - You know, those people suck, so. - But in all sincerity, I don't really hear anything from the democratic side. I mean, obviously you've got sources inside the White House who said this to the Wall Street Journal or anything. I don't think anybody really has a problem with this as long as their side wins. So all of this is just being ignored. I guarantee you, if you watch ABC Nightly News, and I'm just gonna pick David Mirror because he's the highest rated news host on television, he's America's most trusted anchor right now, they don't fucking do anything about this story whatsoever. Guaranteed. - Do you remember Justin Long in "Adiocracy"? - Yes. - He said, "Plenty of Utahds out there living kick-ass lives, my wife was tarted and now she's a pilot." So you can be president, it doesn't matter, man. - It doesn't, and I'm not shocked by any of this. Actually, when you said towards the top of the show, I'm shocked, I'm still shocked that he got through that state of the union. Now granted, it was a mumbled mess toward the end, but even to stand up there through all of this fucking dementia and shit and try to get through it, I think most Democrats view that as a win and that's it. The bar is so low with all of this shit pun intended in Norman D. today that if you just kind of make it through, I think they're happy and I think they're fine with it. Where the rest of it's gonna catch up is if the economy's doing bad and you're down in the polls and all that other shit and I don't know what it's like behind the scenes, like I don't know. - I bet it. - I believe that article though, from the Wall Street show. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, I bet it doesn't smell great. - It stinks, I bet it stinks, yeah. - Like nobody... - Yeah. - And nobody wants to sniff that bicycle seat. - No. And I love. - I know you do, yeah. - Sniffing another man's bicycle seat after a 10 mile ride in July. - But not that one. - Not this one, man. Not that one. That's gonna smell like an old horse saddle from the 1850s. A lot of fucking dirty, sweaty, shitty taints sliding in that out of that thing. I don't wanna whiff that at all. - God damn it, man, imagine that being your... - I don't wanna imagine it. I don't wanna imagine it. - Too bad. - It smells like a porta-potty on day six of a music festival. That's what it smells like. - Man. - Day six, there's just dumps on top of dumps. They probably don't even wipe him at this point. - No. - They spray him down with Febreze. - And those guys in the background, Bob, pull up that first video real quick where he's bending down the shit himself. There's a very old veteran in the back who makes a face there. - Yeah, so he's got a mustache back there. - Well, to be fair, Febreze, Febreze on that guy, the one right there in the middle. That's probably just his face now. - Hi, is it his face or is he like, man, is that shit? - Bob, pull up. - Just going right into his face and nostrils right now. - Just pull up that picture of Jimmy Carter. - Oh, don't do it. Don't do, we're not doing JC like this today, are we? - Well, I'm just saying, there's a point in a man's life towards the anaphy he lives long enough that he has a permanently horrified face. - Oh. - And that's just how it is, man, so. - You mean this high schooler? - Yeah, hello fellow kids. (laughing) - Yimmy, look at little yimmy, dude. - The difference between this one and the guy behind Biden over there is the guy behind Biden's a hero and Jimmy Carter was one of the worst presidents we've ever had. - So was Biden though? All right, group question here, who outlives who? Jimmy Carter or Biden? - Jimmy Carter while the Biden. Could you imagine? - No, my answer is Jimmy Carter. - Yeah, I know. - It's always Jimmy Carter. - 100% Jimmy Carter, dude. - No. - God. - He's using every ounce of his strength to keep his organs and shit inside of him. Unlike Biden, who's on a world shit tour. (laughing) This is, I mean, like, obviously he's the better man. And Jimmy Carter, for as weak as he was as a president, he didn't go around making shit up all the time. You know what I mean? - Yeah. - Like at least he didn't lie to people. - This is where we are, dude, this is it. I love doing the show on a daily basis 'cause it's like, hey, who else would you have to talk to about shit like this? Again, pun intended. It's just astounding. It's just, what a fucking time to be alive, you know? - No, it's a weird time, man. - Fuck me. Fuck me. If you're out there and let's say you got a grandpa or a great grandpa who's shitting in a diaper, at least buy him a ghost from ghostfed.com/drinkinbros. 50% off right now, get the cover for it. The cover is also 50% off for the mattress. - Especially if you're a leaker. - Yeah, if you're a leaker, you're gonna want it. You're gonna want it, you're the one that adjustable base as well, because you're gonna be leaking in an upright position and I feel like that'll enter the diaper more cleanly. We've got a three month old in the studio back there today. - Do you think that that little girl is a pusher or leaker? - Pusher, leaker. You don't leak it that age. - I've never had a baby before. Did they just dump out randomly or is that all? - Yeah, but you see it in their face. - Oh yeah, they do. - I've seen toddlers like that. - Honestly, it's identical to what Biden did. Every time I two year old-- - They lean forward a little bit? - Yes. - Every time my two year old does it? - I'm like, all right. - I've actually seen Jagger do it at your house before. - Yes, right. - He leans forward and shakes and his face gets red. - He made eye contact with you the entire fucking time dude. - That's true, Jagger. - That's a true story. - He's established dominance over me. - Yeah. - So I'm gonna have to fight him before he becomes a full adult. Otherwise I'm fucked. - I'm just sorry about your kid, but I got to do something. I can't let that stand. - Kids are fucking animal. He eats like nine times a day. He woke me up in the middle of the night at 4 a.m. and he was like, dad, I want pasta. And I did it. Usually I'd tell him to go back to sleep, but that's a dominant move. - Yeah, he's baby-grown for sure. - Jesus Christ, man. But look, if you have a relative out there who is shitting themselves, again, make sure they're doing it in comfort. A ghost bit is a beautiful, beautiful mattress to shit yourself in. And then get your wife or a doctor, Dr. Jill Biden to clean it for you. 50% off with the promo code drinking bros that check out, it's all made in the USA too. So at least they're not outsourced in China. And that's everything. The sheets, the pillows, the mattresses, all of it, 50% off. Doesn't matter how many items you put in the carts. So if you're worried about a Biden shit in the bed over and over again, just buy like five covers. And then you can wash them and kind of swap them out. And they're all 50% off. When you check out, you're gonna see a three-year pay-as-you-go program. No interest as long as you have decent credit over there. And then stretch that payment out for three years. Fuck it. All right, the debt doesn't exist. The national debt doesn't exist. None of this, money's fake. It's not real anymore. So who cares? Stretch it out over three years at ghostbed.com/dringabros. Get yourself a new mattress. Next up, will Merrick Garland be arrested? Attorney General Merrick Garland is on the clock. As we say in fantasy football, two house committees have voted to hold Garland in contempt of Congress. House Republicans aren't pleased with Garland failing to cough up an audio tape of the transcribed interview special counsel, Robert Herr, conducted with President Biden in the classified documents case. Garland released a transcript of the interview, but Herr's suggested that one of the reasons he didn't charge Biden was because he thought a jury might view the president as an elderly, forgetful man and take pity on him. Many Republicans regularly claim the president isn't altogether upstairs, and obviously the Wall Street Journal joined that parade yesterday. And they believe the recording could reveal a feeble chief executive who's not fully in control of his faculties. As a result, Republicans could then use the tape to savage Biden and prove their thesis to voters ahead of the election. I don't even know that that thesis needs to be proved. I think that tape though would be invaluable. - Oh yeah. - And I think they're gonna hold on to that with the jaws alike. - I mean, think of it this way. You've got two friends. You're out at a party, it's 2 a.m. And you have two friends. And one of them is a loud mouth asshole with a bad haircut, right? - Yeah. - And the other one is shit-faced. Completely, motor skills are gone, can't speak well. Eyes glazed over, has shit himself. To whom are you handing the keys to your car? - Tough call, tough call on that one. Been there many times too. - Okay. - Many, many times. - So it's not a tough call. - It's very obvious and 50 Cent agrees, right? Not that that's a standard anybody should care about, but certainly- - I care. - Well, I mean- - It's a business man. - The, it's obvious what's going on. A repubes are like, they really want this tape. - Yes. - And Merrick Garland has refused to give it to them and he has no legal basis for doing so. He is, it's not- - Okay, so well, what I understood and correct me if I'm wrong here and I'm sorry for interrupting you. Biden signed an executive order that the tape couldn't be released. - Yeah, he doesn't have that authority either. - Oh, he doesn't. - No, of course not. Why would he have that authority? It's a criminal investigation. - I thought you were a president. - But- - He can use- - The criminal investigation is over correct. - He can use executive privilege to avoid prosecution for sure, but he can't stop this. Like, Congress has requested this and it's a legal issue and they are statutorily bound to give it to them and Merrick Garland has been held in contempt by two separate committees now. Two separate committees. Unclear if the House, which is constituted to 18 to 213 right now would have the votes to hold him in true contempt, like they did with Bannon last year. - Yeah. - But- - Tough call. - Yeah, we'll see. I mean, I don't, I would like to hear the explanations from Republicans who didn't vote for it. - Was there any? - No, no, no. - It hasn't gone to a full vote, but it's passed each committee that's been in. So unclear, to be honest, how that would work. Meanwhile, Trump ally, who I just mentioned, Steve Bannon is in court today to determine if he's gonna go to prison for the same goddamn thing for refusing to comply with Congress. So he's already been convicted. He's already been held in contempt. - Yeah, he's been ordered to jail. - He's been ordered to, is it done? Was that breaking this? - He's ordered to begin his sentence by July 1st. - Yeah, okay, so there you go. So he had been convicted. They sentenced him. He was appealing and today they've ordered him to prison. - And how long did he get, Bob? Do we know? - Couple months, yeah. - It's like four months, I think? - Okay. - So he's gonna go to jail, prison, whatever, for four months. Meanwhile, the acting attorney general can block Congress with no recourse whatsoever. - Yeah. - Right. So it is unclear whether or not the full House will vote on this. I know not one Democrat will vote, obviously. So they need all of the votes from the Republican side. They need 215 out of the 218, I believe. - And that's actually gonna go down here? - I don't know if they're gonna charge him or not. I mean, Mike Johnson is a fucking retard. So who knows what he's up to? - I don't trust that guy at all. - No, he's a swamp person. - I'm looking at some of these other repubes here. So Andy Biggs out of Arizona, repubed here in Congress, says the transcript may be accurate, but you know what? The audio would tell us so much more. I agree. - Yeah, I mean, how many-- - How many pauses and us and us and misstatements that were removed from the record? The only reason I can think of that Garland would block this stuff, there's only one reason, and it's because it damages Biden. There's no other reason not to release that transcript or release the tape. - Well, we heard what Robert Hearst said initially when this all came out, and he said during the recording of this, he couldn't remember when his son died. - Correct. - I mean, there was a fucking laundry list full of shit. - He didn't read the transcript. He listened to the tapes as a prosecutor and decided that nobody would take this guy seriously on the stand 'cause he's old and feeble. People in America need and deserve to hear that tape. Who did the questioning in that? - That, I don't know. Was it her? I think it was Robert Hearst. - Okay. So if it is Robert Hear and he did the questioning and he did the recording and all that other shit, if you're in charge of the transcription there, you could take out or put in whatever you wanted at that point, so-- - Unlikely he did. - But I think that would be key to hearing that audio as if it was edited. - Yeah. - So I understand it. - Yeah, I mean-- - I understand warning it. - I think, I mean, I said that I think they should immediately hold Garland in contempt. This isn't the first time, by the way. They've requested a bunch of shit from Garland over the last two years and he said no each time. Giving them access to certain documents about Hunter Biden's laptop, for example. He said no to that. And then he finally capitulated and let them come in and get a classified debriefing. It's like, all right, cool, man. Like you've been in contempt of Congress multiple times now as the Attorney General. Your job is not to protect the administration, is to protect the American people. That's your job. So I think this guy belongs in prison and I would really like to see that. Whether it's now or in a potential Trump admin, although Trump was on Hannity last night and said that he's not going to go after people revenge style. - He's not going to-- - That's what he said. - I thought he said he was and Hannity was trying to get him to say he wasn't. - No, no, no, he said straight up, he says it's not good for the country to continue this. - That's what Trump said. - Okay, gotcha. - And I think that's a mistake. I think it's great for the country to bury these people. - Well, at what point does it end though? - It ends when they're all buried. - I understand that, but you know-- - We're not in a debate right versus left anymore. We're in a debate with people who want to end the fucking popular will of the people for their own will. That's what we're in a fight over right now and Trump is a populist. That's the end of the fucking conversation. But for me, here's where I have the issue with it. And I brought this up when it happened to Trump and he was getting impeached. I go, if you fucking do this bullshit right now, it's going to happen to every president for the rest of time. - Sure, but there's no unringing that bell now. Trump said he was going to put Hillary Clinton in prison, which he should have done, frankly, right? But he didn't do it because he was like, I don't want to set that precedent. And regardless of that-- - Well, that was the precedent. - Regardless of that, they used his entire presidency to fuck with him, to dismantle the fucking intelligence community and the Department of Justice and use it in a political way only, right? They did it anyway, even though he didn't fucking fight back. This isn't Jesus, you don't turn the other cheek. Fuck these people, they have got to go away. - I agree with you and I hate all these people too, but at some points, me personally, I would hope a president would put the country and all the fucking problems we have in this country over this other bullshit. And then these people not be continuously stuck in this fucking times suck, essentially, of all these stupid fucking hearings every goddamn day. There's plenty of problems to fix in the goddamn country that, yes, at a certain point, it's got to end. Otherwise, we're just having these committee hearings every single day. Look at this week. Fauci was on for two days. Fauci was on for two days. Merrick Garland was on for two days. I don't know who's on today or whatever the fuck it is, but eventually, man, we've got to start focusing on actually fixing the country. - Well, the first thing you do-- - I hate these people as much as you do. - The first thing you do to fix a fire is not to repair the door or the floors. It's to stop the fucking fire. - Well, let me ask you, wouldn't the better move being just getting in there and saying, all right, DOJ is gone, FBI is gone, CIA is gone, ATF is gone. - Yeah, and then put all of them in prison. - You still wanted to put on, okay. - Yep, 100%. - So for me, I would be like, hey, fired, get the fuck out of here, you're all done. Let's start over and just go on with the way we used to be. Because this didn't happen before Trump. - It won't work, though, because all of their bureaucrat friends are still in position. - I'm sure. - They still have donors and money and all this stuff, these people have to go. - I'm purely saying this out of hopes and dreams, but it's, no, yes, this will go on forever now. - Well, hope is not a game plan, right? - Hope is right here, dude. Look at that, that's hope, that's hope, right? - Hope asterisk, but it's not-- - That's my hope. - The asterisk is not what you think it is. - That's my hope right there. - It's her asshole. - Yeah, and that's my hope, that every weekend they'll all enjoy a nice asshole from time to time. Something that beautiful that we can worship again. But yeah, I'm with you. I don't think this ever ends, this keeps going on forever. And if you are doing it, yeah, go ahead. There's somebody in the chat saying, is there equal justice? No, there's not equal justice for any of this shit. The banana republic, bullshit is real. Like we've gone way, way past the fucking deep end here at this point, so yeah, I understand it. I'm just sick of fucking hearing it. Like even this fucking thing, like either do it and lock this guy up and spend all your fucking time doing it and get this fucking tape or move on with your lives. Do something, the republicans need to do something. Democrats got together and did it in the craziest fucking way possible. So yeah, next up, a grandma got sentenced to prison, United States Department of Justice sentenced Paulette Harlow, age 75, to a 24 month prison term. Isn't this the fucking woman we covered? - Oh no, there's somebody else. - Okay, a two year prison term for blockading a Washington DC abortion clinic in October of 2020. Harlow is the 10th and final person to be convicted in connection with the protests at the clinic, with the others receiving sentences ranging between 10 and 57 months or nearly five years. According to the DOJ, charges were brought against Harlow and the other nine defendants under their freedom to access to clinic entrances. I didn't even know that was an actual act. - Yeah, apparently they made so the first amendment protects protests as long as it's not against abortion apparently, right? - Okay, so there's a literal law that says you can't protest this specific thing. So in the video, I don't know if we have it or not. I don't know if it's out there, but in the video you see people chain themselves together and essentially conduct a sit in, right? Which is normal behavior, right? - Yeah. - This is normal behavior. - Yeah, we see protests like that. - I don't think there's any real use in doing it frankly. I don't like, I think protesting is kind of dumb. I don't think there's like civic action is what actually fucking works. So throw this up there. This is the people, these are the grandmas that are getting sentenced to years in prison. Meanwhile, this is the actual footage? - Yeah, if you literally take over a public building or if you take over a public or private university building and then demand humanitarian aid or whatever, or if you sit in the middle of the fucking freeway and create dangerous situations where emergency vehicles can't pass and things like that. Nothing happens to you, not only that, but if something does happen, the vice president of the United States will bail you out of jail, right? But if grandma sits in an abortion clinic and prays like this, then she has to do two years in prison. And when the judge had something really snarky to say to her during the sentencing period, it was like she's 74 years old, you're gonna send her to two years in jail? What the fuck? And she was like, yeah, she should have thought about that before she did it. It's like this woman didn't hurt anybody, nobody's dead, nobody's injured, nobody lost money or property. - Right. - Are you fucking kidding me? This judge needs to be thrown in. See, this is another thing. All of these judges that have been doing shit like this, that woman that was dressed like a fucking Star Trek character in the Pacific Northwest that fucking let all those people go. - Yeah. - That just like robbed and fucking aggravated assaulted people and shit like that, put her in prison forever. All these people have to go forever. - Yeah. - Otherwise we don't get a country back. There's gotta be consequences when people take the constitution and wipe their fucking ass with it to the detriment of other people. There has to be physical consequences to that. - Yeah, and it feels like these weird, like I didn't know this act existed. - I mean, who the fuck makes a specific law to ban a particular type of protesting? Imagine for one moment if somebody made a law where you can't go protest conservatives at college universities anymore. And if you do, it's a fucking felony. If you show up to a Ben Shapiro thing or a Jordan Peterson thing now and protest in black people's entryways, if you show up to a public university and block Jews from going to their fucking classrooms and shut down to campus for two weeks, then it's a felony. No, they would never ever even dream of doing something like that. But because of abortion, which is not a constitutionally guaranteed right, what the fuck are you talking about? - Yeah, this is not a constitutionally guaranteed right. They made it a felony to protest murdering babies, right? That's how these people feel about it. It doesn't matter if they're right or wrong. It's not violent. - Yeah, and I'm looking at it now. So it says here, "convicted of felony conspiracy against civil rights." I mean-- - You don't have the civil right to kill a fucking baby. I'm sorry, man. - It's pretty vague there across the board. So why didn't BLM or any of the fucking pro-Palestine people or any of those guys get any jail time? - I mean, this is just, we're fighting a war right now and the right just hasn't decided to start fighting yet, for whatever reason. - There's no, look, I said this the other day, there's no organization. - There's no organization and they have jobs. - Yeah, that's the short version. I think the citizens who Republicans have jobs and they have to go to work every day and they value that and doing a good job more than the rest of this stupid shit. And then I think the people that are in power, the Mike Johnson's of the world and those other cons. - Cowards. - They're cowards, and that's it. - Wannathans in the chat says they should make it illegal to protest these nuts. - I've never protested your nuts though. - Not mine, no. I wouldn't do it either, I wouldn't do it. - And if I did, I should get two years in prison, okay? - For that one, for that one. - Yeah, that one, no, that one, you wouldn't pass a law on a guy ahead. - And if you're in prison, you know, it's boring. - Man, that sucks. - Like most of your day, you get like 23 hours a day, you're just kind of fucking dicking around, right? - Yeah. - In the most part, nothing to do. - So, did you read the rest of this? Harlow's sister, Jean Marshall, age 74? - Yeah, she got two years as well. - She got two years in jail as well with three years of supervised release after that. So, she'll be 76 when she gets out and then you got to supervise her for three years. One would imagine that we could use that money, that taxpayer dollars in a better fashion. - It's gonna be a 76 year old grandma with a fucking ankle bracelet on because she chained herself to somebody else inside of an abortion clinic, like really? Why, you have to ask yourself, why is one side of the political system in the United States so interested in talking to kids about sex and having fucking trannies run around in front of children, right, and having pride parades where dudes have their dicks out in front of children and trying to murder fucking babies? What the fuck is that? I don't understand that. I understand having body autonomy and medical freedom and shit like that. And frankly, I'm not interested in the abortion issue that much 'cause it doesn't really affect me, frankly, I'm not, but people are interested and as is their right to be. I just don't understand why one side of the political aisle is so hyper focused on fucking with kids. It doesn't make any sense to me. It's like some kind of weird goddamn religious cult. - Yeah, and watching Kamala Harris, I think it chatted about this on yesterday's show on Kimmel, that's what they're leading with is abortion. - So all of this is what they're leading with. Their entire campaign for 24 is that. - But it's nothing else that you positive you could say about what has gone on the last four years. - Yeah, it's so weird too 'cause the vast majority of people, this issue will never touch, right? The vast majority of people will never be aborted, obviously. - Yeah, well, we don't know. - Or have one. It's a very small minority of people and it's mostly minorities, as a matter of fact. And the entire thing was started by people who were just trying to get rid of black people, right? Let's be real. Gun control and pro abortion, that's all about taking guns away from black people and about making sure that not too many of them are born. - Right, I mean, both of these organizations were started by racist assholes. That's how it was. - Probably, yeah. - Not probably, that is exactly what it is. - Started by Bush and well, Reagan with the gun control thing you were talking about. - The Bush, what? - Reagan with the black paper stuff. - No, that started way before Reagan and that was in California and it was a democratic piece of legislation, he just signed it. But yes, the push towards gun control originally started the 1960s before Reagan at any rate. - And you remember it was because black panthers were walking through the streets with-- - Well, that's why Reagan passed the bill in California. But the attacks against the NRA, for example, so the NRA, until the 1980s, all they did, they were not a pro gun lobby. All they did was train people, right? - They supported Reagan signing that law. - Oh, I know, yeah. They've been horrible. And that Wayne LaPierre Dick in the '90s was like, they supported the assault weapons ban as well. - Yeah, I don't think the NRA needs to exist either. - No, no, but for a law-- - It's worthless. - In California, even today, to be a certified weapons instructor in California, you have to be certified by the NRA. - Right. - To be a weapons instructor in California. That's how that works, right? So this is, all this stuff is just fucking retarded nonsense. Retarded nonsense, it's all based in some kind of division or racism or some shit like that. It's just boggles my mind that the people who are actually racist are just out there. You're racist for making a joke about something. Like, okay, well, what about the Klan that you started? - Yeah. - That fucking murdered all those people. - Yeah. That was a big one. That was a big one we overlooked. - That actually, we did an episode on that the other day. The Klan was very bipartisan. - Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - And it's constitution, or composition rather, it was bipartisan, but not in its founding. - It's, yeah, yeah, the original one, but the resurgence in the early 1900s, it was like Democrats in the South, and then for whatever reason, I did this episode on how Notre Dame got their mascot name, actually, there were no black people in Indiana for the Klan to fuck with. So they started fucking with the Catholics. But it was all, for whatever reason, I don't know why it latched on there, but-- - What's the mascot's name, Finding Irish? - Yeah, the football team fought the Klan in the 20s. - No, shit. - Yeah, the Irish did. - That's pretty funny. - That's funny to that. - But they were all Republicans in Indiana, and actually, Indiana had more members than Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi. - So they just had-- - Indiana does it out of board, I'm not gonna say that. - They just had hate FOMO. I mean, that's a weird-- - Literally, yeah. - No, weird thing. - There's nothing going on there. You and I have been to Indiana too many times, and there's nothing going on. - One time is too many. It's not even a real state. - I've been to Atlanta, I've been to Indiana a lot. - In the ultimate, like, beautiful ethnic irony, the students ran to the Klan office. The Klan had an official office in South Bend, Indiana, had a piece of real estate, and they started throwing, there was a grocery store across the street, and they wanted to knock out the lit cross with light bulbs in the window in the front of the office. There was a barrel outside the grocery store full of potatoes, and they just started, these Irish kids just started hucking potatoes at the Klan cross. - See, this is how a potato famine happens. - Sure is. - We've gotta be really careful. - Very careful. - Because it's gotten us before. Even though we were on the island surrounded by fish. - Yeah, you can get us again too, guys. - Okay. (laughing) - We'll keep it in a sports theme here. Our sponsor'smybookie.com. Promoco drinking bros doubles that first deposit all the way up to a thousand dollars. Get off the couch and get into the action today with mybookie.com. Turn your love of sports into your new side hustle shit. There's odds for Notre Dame already up on my bookie right now, so if you're a fighting Irish fan, you can go there and bet on them to win. I bet you they're fucking high, Bob. What you reckon those odds are for Notre Dame when the naddy this year are? - They have a pretty easy schedule. I would imagine it's under 10 to one. Maybe at 10 to one. - Whoa, really? - No, I would say probably like 25 to one. Let's pull it up now on my bookie now. I'm curious. - They're definitely not fucking 10 to one. - Oh my God, I don't want it though. - Oh, 25 to one on the dot area. - Yeah, five to one, look at that. - Are they the favorites? They don't have to play a champ game. No, they're not favorites. Georgia, Georgia, Ohio State and Texas are under 10 to one. - Yeah, what, it's, Georgia's probably closer to like four to one. The three to one. - Three to one, yeah. - 'Cause I better know Ohio State on my bookie the other day, it was four and a half to one. I already locked that in at four and a half to one. You can too, all the college football odds are up on my bookie.com right now. National champions, Heisman Trophy winners. So if you got favorites or sleepers out there that you believe in, now's a great time to get the best odds you can. And then obviously tonight's. Finally, the NBA finals are starting. Great fucking series. We got Luca and Kyrie versus Tatum and Brown. Can't fucking wait. Kyrie's going back to the garden. I think the lowest amount, Bob and the Kyrie points total 'cause you can bet on the over under of points for every single player. It's like 30 for Kyrie tonight. So they're expecting him to go off. Looking forward to that. Thank God that's back. And then is the NHL start tomorrow? - Yeah, it's tomorrow. - NHL finals tomorrow? - No, it's Saturday, isn't it? - It's Saturday, yeah. - Okay, Saturday. - I mean, so long. - All of it, just put 'em every other night. So that way we can at least have something to fucking that forward. - Well, so the last game of the Euler Stars, the Western Conference Finals was Sunday last week. - Yeah, it's been a while. NBA's been off for what, eight, nine days? - And Rangers Panthers ended on Saturday last week. So it's gonna be, let's see, seven and six days, respectively. I mean, that's a lot of fucking time off. - Fuck yeah, it is. - But they already sold all the TV, so. - Man, nothing you can do about it. Now, you know I always make a pick on this show. I've got the Mavs winning, and I've got tonight, I've got Mavs plus six and a half on mybookie.com. - I can't believe they're even a dog, to be honest. I mean, I understand. - That's a lot of points. - I get all the, whatever the fuck that's going on there. - Poor Zingas is back. - Home stuff, Poor Zingas is back, but he's gotta work his way back in the rotation. - It is, yeah. - It's like, I don't believe in Boston's closers in any way. - Me neither. - And Kyrie is the closer in this series. - But they're not gonna be able to leave Poor Zingas out on the three-point line like they did go bare. - Yeah, that's true. - That's true, for sure. - It's a fun series, man. I mean, there's arguments on both sides there for who's gonna win this thing. I mean, on the Mavs, I think it's gonna go deep. I think it's gonna go six or seven games, too, in that series. - I would say so, yeah. I mean, there's a lot of talent on these two teams. And there are some dogs on both sides. Kyrie's a dog, obviously. - Luca. - Luca's a dog. Derek Williams is a fucking dog. I don't know, I mean, honestly, Tatum and Brown, eh. They're great players, they're both great, literally great players, but are they, when it matters? - Is this the time that they finally get over the hump, we'll see. Go to mybookie.com and another promo code drinking, bros. Double that first deposit, up to $1,000. I got a lot of money on tonight's game. I know that, plus six and a half for Dallas tonight's. Next up, CDC director, admissions former CDC director, Robert Redfield, makes a series of stunning admissions that were once deemed misinformation. There was a decision not to do anything that made the vaccine sound like it didn't work. Two thirds of the people that I'm seeing infected in Maryland have been vaccinated. If you came down and visited me and interviewed my patients, you interview patient after patient after patient that did not have COVID, but are very sick. You would say very sick, long COVID patients, and it's all from the vaccine. The spike protein is immunotoxic. You get infected. It's immunotoxic, but when you give the vaccine, we make the spike protein. When I give you the mRNA vaccine, I don't know how much spike protein you may make, because I give you the mRNA and then your body goes and makes it, you may make it for a week. You may make it for a month. - Yeah, all of these are fucking crazy statements. This is why, by the way, you test things before you inject them into human beings. That's precisely why. By the way, our friend, Peter McCullough, replied to this video, and you can play the video, Bob, if you want, it's in the link there. Actually, let's watch the video first, and then we'll reply to it. It was on Chris Cuomo's show after he just got decimated by Dave Smith the other day. - Now, did Dr. Peter McCullough go on Chris Cuomo's show? - No, no, no, he responded to a tweet. - Gotcha, I found. - Gotcha, okay. - Because they stopped tracking people that were infected that were previously vaccinated. So if you didn't track it well, because then you couldn't report that there were people vaccinated that got infected. - This is the form of the record. - But no, why did they stop tracking this? - But I think there was a decision not to do anything that made the vaccine sound like it didn't work. You know, I've always tried to be honest that I think there was some major mistakes in the vaccines. They should have never been mandated. I also felt that people should have been more honest about the fact that there were side effects to those vaccines, and some people were actually harmed. The other thing I thought there should be, you know, more honesty about the fact that the vaccines don't protect against infection. I remember Biden saying, you know, this is an epidemic of the unvaccinated. When I was Hogan's chief public health advisor in Maryland after I left CDC, I was saying, wait a minute, two thirds of the people that I'm seeing infected in Maryland are have been vaccinated. I mean, the president of the United States said it. Biden said this is an epidemic of the unvaccinated. Tony wasn't aggressive in putting this in perspective. The CDC didn't put it in perspective. The reality is this vaccine, listen, it's a short duration in which this vaccine provides some efficacy, maybe four to six months. Max, you know, if you came down and visited me and interviewed my patients, you know, you'd interview patient after patient after patient that did not have COVID, but are very sick. - Right. - You would say sick long COVID patients, and it's all from the vaccine. Now, what is it, Chris? Well, it's the spike protein is immunotoxic. All right, when you get infected, it's immunotoxic. But when you give the vaccine, we make the spike protein. Now, this is my opinion, okay? When I give you an mRNA vaccine, which I help develop and I've given to a lot of patients and I've taken it myself multiple times, I don't know how much spike protein you make. - Right. - Because I give you mRNA and then your body goes makes it. - Right. - So you make eat a little, you may make a lot, you may make it for a week, you may make it for a month. I'm now more of the point of view and I wish the country would switch more rapidly. I'm more of the point of view and in my clinical practice, I use the protein vaccine. So I know exactly how much spike protein you get. - Your body's not becoming a manufacturing plant. - Right. - Okay. - I give you a certain amount. - Our friend, Dr. Peter McCullough, replied to the video, Dr. Redfield desperately needs to get up to speed with Brona et al who found full-length Pfizer, Moderna, mRNA produced spike circulating and blood of vaccine victims for at least six months could be longer. The proline, proline signature holds spike in the perfusion confirmation and readily identifies vaccine spike protein and not that from infection. So this dangerous thing that he's talking about, this danger from the vaccine is persistent for a minimum of six months, right? And then even to his own admission, this is the former CDC director. He doesn't know how it continues to produce spike protein in your body afterwards, right? Well, color got banned from everything. They tried to come after him legally, they tried to take his medical license away just from basic science. We talked about it when he was on the show here, they YouTube threatened to delete our channel, we had them on the show. - In addition to that Yahoo News reported yesterday that quote, "COVID vaccines could be partly to blame "for the rise in excess deaths "and to pandemic scientists have suggested," you don't say, right? So research out of the Netherlands analyzed data from 47 Western countries and discovered there have been more than 3 million excess deaths since 2020 with the trend continuing despite the rollout of vaccine and containment measures. They said the unprecedented figures raised serious concerns and called on governments to fully investigate the underlying causes, writing in BMJ public healthy authors from whatever university this is. And Amsterdam said quote, "Although COVID-19 vaccines "were provided to guard civilians from suffering morbidity "and mortality by the COVID-19 virus, "suspected adverse events have been documented as well. "Both medical professionals and citizens "have reported serious injuries and deaths "following vaccination to various official databases "in the Western world," they added. During the pandemic, it was emphasized by politicians and the media as a daily, on a daily basis that every COVID-19 death mattered in every life-deserved protection through containment measures and COVID-19 vaccines. In the aftermath of the pandemic, the same morale should apply. As a matter of fact, this stuff is still happening, right? - Well, that's why everybody keeps talking about it. A defensive lineman from the Chiefs, B.J. Thompson, is in stable condition at an area hospital after having a seizure and going at a cardiac arrest. He's 25 years old. NFL teams do not draft or sign people without doing a full physical to include heart health. - And it's a gnarly physical. - It is a like 90 fucking point physical. They look at everything, they look at your fucking butthole for two or three hours, right, everything. We have seen soccer players, anybody that's in endurance sports, especially, just dropping dead on the fucking pitch, or basketball players dropping dead on the fucking court. - The Daily Mail put a story out about this today. About a study that just came out about a rise in heart problems with athletes. - And what we know now, the new research that we have now shows that myocarditis and pericarditis isn't as the CDC, the WHO, and the United States government tried to tell us also comes from COVID. No, it only comes from the vaccine. It does not come from natural immunity to COVID. Doesn't happen. So once again, it's like to point out that within a month of all this shit happening, we called them out for trying to vaccinate kids, for pushing vaccines on people that are unnecessary and unsafe. We were right, you were wrong. It wasn't an accident. You chose a shame and threatened people. You chose a winner, a severe illness in death, the pandemic of the unvaccinated. You are fucking criminals. You chose to shame and threaten people, force vaccinate them, put them out of business, ruin their fucking lives, and your scumbacks were doing it. And there will be a fucking reckoning on this. I guarantee you that. - And the guy doing the interview should be close to the top of that list, and he got buried in that show the other day. - That's a good start. I think flayed might be best, right? But we'll see how it goes. - Yeah, surprised that he had this guy on the show to go through this. I'm surprised. - He's trying to pretend that it never happened. - What he said, what Cuomo's saying? - Is that what he's trying to do? - Listen to what he's saying. He's like, "Well, why didn't people push back on this?" A lot of people did, Chris, and you tried to shut them fucking down. - And there's endless footage of him saying it on CNN. So that shit, the guy that, what was it, Patrick, David's show the other day? - Yeah. - Who said, "Hey, dude, you actively said this on a clip "like live on air, that we should shame these people. "We should, they should lose their jobs "than their fucking livelihood and everything else." So I don't know why, it feels like he's trying to circle back and cover up his tracks, but it's like, there's just miles and miles of footage. - Yeah, the internet exists, bud. Sorry. - Forever. So yeah, shocking though, what's the CDC's guys? What's his story? - I'm surprised he's not in hiding somewhere. Like, why would you come out and do this interview? - I don't know. Honestly, I sincerely don't understand it. - It's very odd, man. Because it's almost incriminating yourself on these shows to be used against you later, 'cause podcasts and all that other shit are now starting to be used in court. - I mean, this would be like, Gary and Hemler being like, "Man, fucking Hitler really fucked up, dude. "Can you believe what that guy did?" It's like, you. - Oh, on the more positive stuff here. This is an urgent public service announcement from the perfect gene. If you think you've-- - I'm wearing a mask. - Are you really standing up? Look at that, bud. - I'm wearing it right now. - Dan's got him on right now. Right on cue. - The most comfortable shit of all time. - Yeah, if you think you've mastered the looking sweat pants and joggers, you're only one step away from pajamas in public. Your significant other said you look like a slob. It's time to show your sexy ass in jeans. Damn it, that's today's sponsor, perfect gene. They have uncrushed 350,000 men's nuts. And yours are next. I love that copy. These aren't just another pair of your stiff cardboard and jeans, they're super fucking comfortable. It's why they're called the perfect gene. These are easily the most comfortable gene there is. 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Philadelphia leaders were on a mission to attract a record-setting number of guests to a drag event kicking off Pride Month, but safety concerns left them wary of promoting the events they hoped would make history. Were they going for Guinness Book of World Records? Yeah, yeah, Guinness was there and they did set the record. Really? Guinness, the Book of World Records, is interested in how many pedophiles can we get into one location at the same time? Good for them. This would have been a great place for a fucking airstrike to be honest, if the kids weren't there. Unfortunately, it was all about the kids, as we said before. Was there kids there? Kids. So federal officials last month warned of terrorists. Terrorists. Sure. Possibly targeting the Gaylord events. I'm not calling it that stupid alphabet soup. Stores, gyms, restaurants have faced bomb threats over Pride, merchandise, include, but none of them happen. Not one fucking thing has happened, right? Maybe some wingnut dumb dums in their mom's basement have said shit on the internet. Not one thing has happened. Meanwhile, $2 billion with the damage and 30 murders were committed because some fentanyl addict fucking died on the street. Fuck 'em. You know what I mean? At any rate, so on Friday, just one day before a dragged story time in Philadelphia, organizers finally made the event public describing their goal to set a record, quote, kids and kids at heart, which is to say pedophiles, right? Well, enjoy stories read by Philly's most famous queens. Saturday they met their goal. Philadelphia claimed the first title for the largest attendance at a drag queen storytime reading. Guinness World Records confirmed to The Washington Post, quote, "It was amazing to see that the community "came out literally on such short notice "that they wanted to support this effort," said Mark Seal, publisher of the Philadelphia Gay News and also a fucking pedophile. He is a pedophile. - Delco, did you? Were you a subscriber to the Philadelphia Gay News when you were there? - He's the fucking editor in chief. What are you talking about? (laughs) I was unaware of this publication. - So was everybody else. The Gaylord Community publication received the title for hosting event which brought together 263 people to hear five drag queens read stories. Seagal, also known as the pedophile for this reading, said the storytime was a chance to bring visibility to drag events because there hasn't been any of that. - No. - Jesus fucking Christ, which some conservative politicians have sought to ban, which they should, claiming the events are inappropriate for children. Legislators have also introduced hundreds of bills targeting transgender rights. No, they haven't. There's not one thing that a fucking adult trans person can't do, not one thing. You can cut your fucking dick off and staple it to your fucking forehead if you want and not one person's gonna care. We're gonna make funnier 'cause you're dumb, but nobody will try to stop you because to be honest, sterilizing yourself is the best thing you can do. - Man, when you read shit like this and you see shit like this, it just goes back to why. Why would you wanna do it with kids, aren't you? - There's only one fucking reason. There's only one reason for this shit. It's because we are in a state of moral decay in this country. And the last bastion of any sort of ethical agreement from right to left and everybody in between is don't fuck with kids. And nobody cares about that anymore, right? So, it's like this fucking pedophile, Segal, about attempting to restrict drag shows for kids. That says to me, they wanna put us back in the closet. Nah, man, we just want you to stay away from kids. Nobody cares how many cocks you suck with your asshole. - Yeah, I don't give a shit about that. - Just stay the fuck away from kids. By the way, just to make it clear from the first sentence in this story, smoking some shit back that's praying on children doesn't make you a terrorist. This makes you a good person, to be honest. Lauren in the chat here, Lauren Manley mentioned that as we know it's PTSD and awareness month, right? - Yep. - And the VA is having a big meeting on veteran suicide. Guess what city it's in? - Come on. - Is it really? - No, it's not in Philly, it's in Portland, Oregon. - I was like, where are you going to Philly? - It's in Portland, Oregon, which is a leftist shit hole and not one military base is there. The VA's not there, it's in DC. Why in Portland, why is it there? Why put it in some fucking shitty left-leaning, obscure city on the fucking left side of the country where nobody is. - It's because the VA doesn't give a fuck about people blowing their brains out, that's it. Like, and this is where we are now, we... - Oh man. - George Floyd is a hero, right? Wagging your dick in front of children is cool and you're a victim if somebody tells you not to do that. And the organization that is primarily responsible from stopping dudes from killing themselves, it's a fucking joke to them, right? That's where we are in American society right now. - And then also there's a movie we made about George Floyd called "Daddy Changed the World" and it's from his children. - No, the largest concentration of veteran and active duty service member in the entire country by a factor of about three is Frisco to San Antonio. So anywhere on this line on 35 would have been great. Made a lot of sense, you would have got a lot of attendance. Portland, you're gonna get a bunch of fucking blue hairs. - Will you? - All the fucking trannies in the military are gonna show up there and be like, oh, you know what we need to do is get more trans rights, more access to gender affirming care, that'll stop people from killing themselves. - Or increase it either way, but yeah, that's a wild one, man. That's a wild one. Why even have it on the same month? Why not swap it up, you know? Is there so many fucking causes now that we need to have 38 different titles for months now? 'Cause it's Pride Month, it's PTSD month and all that other shit, like switch it up a little bit, I guess. Doesn't make any fucking sense to me, man, but congratulations on setting the record, I guess. Everybody who is there, how many kids were this thing? Do we know? - I don't know about kids, unclear. All I know is that every adult that's there should be fucking thrown into the ocean with a rock tight around their neck. - That's fucking crazy, man. Next up, more gaslighting from NBC News, Donald Trump could turn America's spy services into weapons of retribution against domestic political opponents, skew intelligence findings in favor of authoritarian leaders and undermine information sharing with US allies, if he wins the second term, more than a dozen former intelligence officers, Western officials and lawmakers. It's hold NBC. - You think it's the same guys that signed that fucking letter saying that the Hunter Biden laptop was rushing disinformation? - Ah, could be, could be. What the fuck? Given Trump's track record during and after his first term, including his public remarks, lambasting, the intelligence services, his alleged mishandling of classified information, his vows to seek vengeance against his political opponents and plans by his allies to purge large number of career civil servants deemed to be members of a deep state cabal, former intelligence officers worry that the spy agencies could suffer irreparable damage. Yeah, they could be, could be let go all the way around. - Yeah, I mean, imagine if our domestic spy agencies, imagine if the CIA and NSA were to like, I don't know, spy on people's political opponents or use their authority to demand that social media platforms censor one side of the political aisle, for example. That would be horrible. That'd be bad for the country, right? - And I like this one quote in here. I'm very concerned and I think almost every one of my former colleagues and current colleagues in the intelligence community is very concerned. I haven't talked to a single senior person who said, oh, it's overblown, don't worry, he'll be fine. Just say you're worried about your fucking job, that's it. - Oh, I mean, so if here's another quote, if a determined president supported by a group of senior aides who both support and enable him and not object wishes to do his bidding throughout the entire executive branch, there are few practical limits on his ability to do so unless Congress has the political will to step in. The law is going to be pushed pretty far before it's actually going to produce a counter reaction. Like, yeah, we've seen that, Obama and Biden over the last eight years have nonstop fucked with Trump. They spied on his campaign, they made up the Russia collusion bullshit, they censored the Hunter Biden laptop story and anything else that might look bad for Biden. - Even Kamala said it the other night, she goes, I'm worried about Trump if he gets back in weaponizing the DOJ, guess what? It's already been weaponized. - That's fucking, I mean, that's some next level gaslighting right there. - And by the way, so Lauren just says, this is the theme for this year's VA anti-suicide. Meaning you're ready for this? - Yeah. - Evolving and meeting diverse needs, finding ways to reach underserved populations such as LGBTQ plus. That's from the VA and the DoD. - And that's their chief concern, isn't it? - Yeah. - That's great. - Why not, you know? - Hey, fuck it, man. - Yeah. - Who gives the shit? Back to the DOJ thing here, this has already happened. You saying you're, now you're worried because it's, are you worried because it's happening currently? Like right now, I mean, literally right now. - I mean, that's the concern, right? Hey, they're gonna do to us what we just did to them. We've gotta do something. - Now, now we've gotta do something because, oh my God, he might actually get in there and then they're gonna do to him what they do to us and vice versa and all this other shit. Even that Fannie Willis thing, that trial in Georgia got pushed indefinitely there after another judge looked at that and was just like, what the fuck are we doing here, man? So, I think they don't have a choice but to put 'em in jail next month. That's my guess here. How else are you gonna stop 'em at this point? - That's not gonna stop 'em. - I don't think so either, but-- - That's, all that's gonna do is create fucking violence. - Yeah, but it's a strange time indeed. So yeah, I bet you're worried. You're fucking doing it now and it sucks and you're seeing how much it sucks. You're getting away with it now. If he gets back in, you sure won't. (sighs) But again, we'll see. Next up, sponsor wise, we got Manscape.com. Promo code drinking bro is gonna get you 20% off plus free shipping. - Trim 'em up. - Trim 'em up, dude. Gotta. - It's getting hot out of here in Texas, dude. - Get real hot down there. Call 'em what you want. Knockers, golden nuggets, thighs, slappers, et cetera, but her friends over at Manscape refer to them as the boys. I think it's an Amazon Prime Show, isn't it? - It is, yeah, but it's not about testicles. - Really? - It's about superheroes, which I consider by testicles to be. My testicles are superheroes, for sure. - Yeah, they sure are. - I'm sure. What are you, Hulk? What are you else? What do you call your other nut? - Oh, Iron Man. Yeah. - Hulk and Iron Man, why not? - Not every man has children, but every man is responsible for their two boys below the waist. When your little guys have more hair than they need, trust Manscape for all your grooming dreams. Boys need loves, too. So join 10 million men worldwide who trust Manscape by going to Manscape.com. Use the promo code drinkingbros for 20% off and free shipping. You heard it here first. The boys are back in town. I trimmed mine up the other day, dude. I go three times a year, but I'll take the fucking guard off, dude. - I'm like a... - I'll go clean. If we're on Patreon today, I'd call it. - Well, it's a month for me. - Yeah, once a month? - Yeah. - All right. I'm not a hairy, I don't have that much hair. - I'm not, I'm kind of hairy, yeah, but I like to keep it shorn. - Yeah. - As I can see, I wanna look down there and see it. You know what I mean? It makes me happy to look at my own junk. - For sure. Every man knows it's scary shaven down there. I've never fucking nicked my junk dick or anything. It's truly the best, and the new one here, the 5.0 Ultra, is it's got a fucking LED light on that bitch, too. So if it's too dark, boom, boom! You're good to go. I mean, they've got everything over there. Nail trimmers are fucking amazing. All their products rock. Their boxers are fucking good, dude. Even comes in a travel case, big fan of everything that got going on over there at Manscaped. It's one of those products where if you don't see it at your bro's house, you're like, what the fuck are you doing in life? Could you imagine doing it old school anymore? - I check. Whenever I go into my friend's bathroom-- - So long, every single time. - Every time I go in there to do cocaine, I just look and see if they've got some kind of trimmer at all and if it's not Manscaped, it's like, what do you do? - Then you're disgusting human being. I agree. - And I'll leave right then. - Yeah, dude. I'll get the fuck out of there. Get 20% off plus free shipping with the code "drinkin' bros" at Manscaped.com. It's 20% off plus free shipping at Manscaped.com with the promo code "drinkin' bros" for the best your boys have ever looked. Trust Manscaped. Next up, Elon saves the day, a reclusive tribe and the Amazon finally got hooked up to the internet thanks to Elon Musk. Look at that. I'm going to be torn apart by social media and pornography addiction, elders complain. That's gonna happen and I'm sorry. - Yeah. - All right, if you have never seen porn in your life, first time you see it, do you really wanna stop watching it at that point? - I can't. - Can't? - Sure can't. - I mean, can you imagine never having seen technology before and all of a sudden you've got access to every piece of porn ever made? - I, that would be the end of your life, I think. - Is this them? - Holy shit, dude. Look at these fucking people. You think that lady was fuckin' chilling off in the middle, dude? - Oh yeah, she had that, look at that cane that dude's holding that was inside her, the whole thing. (laughing) That's what I heard. I can't verify that, but. (laughing) - Brazil's 2000 member Marubo tribe has been left bitterly divided by the arrival of Tesla founders, Starlink service nine months ago, which connected the remote rainforest community along the Hidui. That's not, that's not correct. And I know that. - And I know that. - River. To the web for the first time when it arrived, everyone was happy. Said Tashi Nama, Marubo 73, as he told the New York Times, but now things have gotten worse. Young people have gotten lazy because of the internet and they're learning the ways of the white people. No way did he say that. - So I like how the ways of the white people have gone from colonization and white supremacy to social media and pornography. - Yeah. - We've really come a long way. - I feel like we have shit. I was worried about being called a white supremacist. Now, I'll take a lazy over white supremacist. - I'm actually looking forward to it now. - Yeah, why not? It's like, yeah, I am supreme. You're correct. Thank you for listening. - The Marubo are a chest tribe. Fuck, does that mean? Who we've a friend of prong, it says kissing in public? What does that mean, they don't make out? - Chased, that means conservative, modest, particularly when it comes to ethical things, sexual things. - Chastity. - Like chastity. - So they don't fuck? - Somebody who's chased would wear conservative clothing. - All right. Hey, oh, look, I'll take your word for it. Pop on in, grab yourself a hard AF seltzer. We got a bunch of listeners from the studio, including a three month old. Is it a three month old still here, by the way? She's sleeping right now. - She's a great baby. - She drank a bunch of fucking hard AFs, and now it's over. - Yeah, what a great baby. If that was mine, do the fucking thing would be screaming. What a great child. But yeah, this game changer by Musk here could upend standards of decorum. We're worried about young people who were going to want to try it. He said regarding the kinky sex acts, they've suddenly been exposed to-- - I mean, basically, you've been having tribe sex forever, which I assume is like either miss or fucking dog or something. It's not, it's something, especially if it's a, what do you call it, a patriarchal thing. I doubt there's a whole lot of the woman deciding what's going on there. Let's, I'm trying to be delicate here. - Yeah. - But all of a sudden now you see some girl getting her fucking getting blasted out, peeing on people, dug out fucking stuff, put inside her that doesn't belong there. - Scat porn. - Butthole sex. - Yeah. - I don't know, Bob, what do we know about uncontacted tribes in their relationship with the butthole? Anything at all? - It varies by, you know, place by place. Some people discover the butthole early on in their socialization as human beings, and other people are just sort of late to get around back. - Delco, you seem to have something to say here. - I was gonna say they're goats who's probably just Amazon position. - God damn it. - Ah, nailed it. Son of a bitch, and we call that a call back in the biz, you know? Damn it, man. That's a good one. Way to go, Delco. Yeah, it's, it'd be really shocking to see this shit for the first time if you lived in a fucking hut like that in the background your entire life, and then you're seeing reverse cowgirl for the first time. - Well, what if somebody sent 'em all the memes that we showed you that day? Tubgirl, Lemon Party. - Lemon Party. - One guy, one jar. - I was just in two girls, one cup. Like, and all of a sudden they're seeing that for the first time. That's when they're gonna be like, we're never talking to these people again. That's why aliens haven't landed here. I truly believe aliens haven't landed here because the way they would know we're here is by our radio signature, which is about what, 120 years old now, and it's made its way out, so it's made it 120 light years out. That's as far out as it would have been. And they were probably on their way at one point when they saw silent films and I love Lucy and shit, and then all of a sudden the 2000s hit. They start seeing German shies up porn and shit. Like, nah, hell no, man. The only thing we're sending there is a goddamn nuke. - Yeah. 'Cause I mean, you remember seeing your shocking shit for the first time. - Yeah, because we grew up, we didn't grow up with the internet. Our generation. Bob, I guess maybe yours. - We did, yeah. - So internet was in basically every house, but at the time I was in like seventh grade. - There's a period between like zero years, obviously, and maybe 13, 14, 15, that time period where we were pounding off to like fucking Victoria's Secret magazine dish. - Or, you know, just one-- - Or the one, it's just one fucking centerfold here in there. - Yeah, maybe you had a folded up piece of paper somewhere, and then all of a sudden, it's people getting dumped out on. - Yeah. - You know what I mean? That was a shock. - It is shocking. - That was a shock for me. - The same here. - I remember, I'm not even kidding. I remember, I very clearly remember the first time I saw a dick going to butt. - Was it, you knew you were shocked by it? - Yeah, it was a group of teenage boys, right? Somebody had found, it was like the Lord of the goddamn rings or something, you know what I mean? It was like, oh, the precious. So we're watching this, and one guy's like, there's no way a dick's going in and out of her butt like that. - That easy, really? And I was like, as a child, I was like, man, yeah, he's probably right. That must be trick photography or something. And as an adult, I'm like, that was a dick in a butt. For sure, that's what that was. And now I'm a horrifying. - There was one dude in high school who brought over a VHS tape, and you see it for the first time, and all of us were shocked. Probably, we had the same looks on our faces as tribe, but to be honest with you, what? - Well, the woman looks really happy. Blow that face of her subject. - She looks happy about it. He does not. - The woman in the middle. - Yeah. - The woman in the middle. - The one on the right smiling too, that's right. - The woman in the middle, I think, is the colonizer. I think she's the-- - Oh, she's the white liberal lady. - Yeah, she's the bringer of-- - Oh, the internet, yeah. - Yeah. - She's the pro sex worker person. - Look at that, dude. - Look at her fucking thick-ass legs. - The woman on the right is wearing a Harvard shirt. - Yeah. - Do you think she went? - Well, I guess she's the ones that are wearing real clothes are the Westerners, right? - Oh, oh, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. Look, it's kind of like when the losing team, the Super Bowl, ships out all their clothes to Africa. I didn't know if it was the same way, you know? - Yeah. - Like Harvard was just like, "Look, man, we've had a lot of shit going on this year. "Can we just ship out all our T-shirts "to some fucking jungle tribe?" - Yeah. - Let's see what happens there. Either way, Elon's doing God's work. If you're them, what are you watching the internet at all, I guess? - Presumably they gave them devices. - Yeah, they got devices too. - Yeah, they got phones and computers? - Phones or tablets or something. - Were you plugging in in that hut, Bob? - I think probably some solar stations or something like that. Look, they didn't just show up with a satellite dish and then leave. Like they gave them the infrastructure to jerk off. - Yeah, man, you gotta blame that. I'm not, you can't blame Elon for that. - I'm sure there's plenty of coconut oil out there. - Tons. - And that's not the question here. But the question is, Elon just gave him the internet. Who gave him the fucking phones and computers and the ability to charge shit up so they could jack off all the things. - That was also Elon. He brought the supplemental things. - He doesn't make phones yet, though. - They're working on phones? - No. - I'm sure they just brought them to iPads and shit too. Like here you go. Like it fucking matters to Elon. - Eh. - The fucking $300 iPad? - Maybe. - Yeah, they're blasting loads on the iPad. - You know what my favorite part about this is and is in interjecting these people into the broader algorithm. - Yeah. - You know what I mean? - Man. - What the fuck are they looking at? Like if you were an adult experience with sexual activity and socialization but in a closed system like that and then all of a sudden you had access to every, at some point it clicks to you that no matter, and this is rule 34 of the internet, no matter what I think of, I can find porn of that. What's this guy searching for? 'Cause you can't be like fucking tribal stepmom or whatever the fuck, right? That's not, that wouldn't be a thing, I don't think. But you would think of something. - I would like to-- - I want to see their search history. I was gonna say, I'd like to rig up their huts, see their search history and then rig it up with cameras and then watch them fuck. 'Cause I think that could be a new subculture-- - As long as you can't smell it 'cause I'm guessing it doesn't smell right. - I bet it stinks. - Yeah, that's the worst smelling sex. - Although, is that like a little beach towel he's got kinda wrapped around his waist or like a little strong? - I think he's wearing board shorts if I had to guess. - So, you know, maybe he's at least airing it out. It's not like they're trapped in there. So, who knows? - Wombretta says they might have Hillary's blackberries there. - It could. There's 15 of them, they're smashed up and they're bleached. - You wanna send those back, actually. - Yeah, send those back over here. Now's the point in the show, we get to the drinking bro of the week. I doubt, highly doubt, anybody back there today. There's, I don't know, a ton of people back here in the studio today. Would even come on at the end of a show like this. - No, they're all actually still in the military. - Well, they are. - They did give us a bottle of Jack Daniel's honey. - Fuck off, cheers, dude. Awesome, man, cheers. Throw a quick camera back there. Are they still here? - Hold your hands over your face. - Yeah, just hold your hands over your face. You can blur yourselves out back there, there you go. We appreciate you guys coming in today. All right, so what I'll do then is on drinkingbros.com, which is where we sell the merch and all that other stuff that you can buy. There is a submission form that you can fill out and it'll go directly to our inbox and I can read it live on Air for Drinking Bro. The Week, this one was submitted by Kyle Brooks from Ohio. He's been a listener since 2019. He's nominating Sean Yocum, living, thank God. Sean is a close friend from our time in the Marine Corps. Sunday, May 26th, he and two others were... Oh man, oh good, thank God. Involved in a plane crash, oh fuck, no, shit. It was, didn't, damn it, you, you motherfucker. We're involved in a plane crash near Fayetteville, North Carolina. He was taken to UNC Hospital with a broken back arm and multiple internal injuries. He was one of my main influences on what a great leader and friend should be. I wish him a quick and easy recovery, even if it takes time. You have the love and support of every Marine and friend that has ever had the amazing opportunity to cross your path. I love you, bud, and I can't wait to see you soon. Valhalla can wait. Man, that was on a different form there and I didn't see the second half of that. I would say almost living on that. You know? Well, I mean... Damn it, man, a broken back fucking arm shit. Oh, shit, multiple internal injuries, shit. Sean, get better, okay? I'll read one more here today, fuck it, who cares? Drinking, bro, submission by Will. That's not a real name. Crunkelton. Crunkelton's a real last name there. Look it up. How do you spell it? I like it. Will Crunkelton. C-R-U-N-K-E-T-O-N. 29 Palms, listener for seven years, nominating Doc Espinosa, who's deceased. That's a real name. Okay, yeah. Crunkelton. That's a tough one, dude. Wanna nominate one of my dudes here who unfortunately took his life on Monday. Doc Espinosa was truly a great dude, who, no matter who you were, made sure the Marines under his care were taken care of and knew what to do that the time came, whether it was self-aid or buddy-aid until he could get there. He will always be and will always be missed forever remembered in the V3/8 India Company. History, Spartunus, Medica, Adorama, man, I'm the wrong person to read that today. I'm the wrong person to read that today. I don't know Latin, okay? We said this earlier in the show. I don't know. Barely no English. Yeah, dude. Come on. That's why I'm a podcast host and not a fucking president of the United States. Good chance that this is on purpose, right? Has to be. Like if I was gonna send in a drink of brother week, I would definitely make it as complicated as possible, just to fuck you over. Damn it, man. I can't end on that now. I can't end on fucking up. All right, there's another one just came in. Drink a bro's submission, Matthew Campbell, North Carolina, listener for eight years, nominating Gerald Hill, John Derrick, or Darnick, I wanna nominate two men for drink of bro the week. Gerald Hill and John Darnick. Oh my God, all right, I love it. He says Darnick, Ross, because you'll fuck it up without the pronunciation. I already did, and I appreciate that in there. Send that. I like that a lot. These two men were great NCOs, but even better men that have put together a reunion for our company for the first time in 20 years. Our reunion is coming up June 8th in Nashville, and they alone have gotten the facility, food, and contact info for the veterans of our company, sent out invites, and set up the entire thing. The amount of food that it's gonna take to feed nearly 200 veterans and their families is quite an undertaking, but Darnick and Hill have not once complained, but continued to keep motivation up and ensure every vet and every family member that attends will have a great time. They have both went above and beyond, and their dedication to the regimental recon troop reflects great credit upon their character as men and brothers. Please give these two DBs of the week. Can't wait to see the boys, especially these two. Thanks for doing what you do for us, Ross and Dan. Absolutely, I tell you what, we'll go a step further here. Matthew Campbell. You were the one who submitted this. If you DM me or Dan, you're in Nashville, Tennessee, we will send you hard AF Seltzer for the event. Free on us. Just send a DM right now if you can, or find Matthew Campbell here, and I'll get a shipment over to you guys for the events on Saturday nights. And then finally, today's D-Day, right? So thanks to the generation that saved the world from bullshit, that was awfully nice of you. Yeah, right. My grandfather was in World War II and different breed of humans, man. That was probably, those were probably the last like real fucking Americans, like the tough fucking bastards, you know, those guys. I mean, there's always real Americans. There is. It's just like, have there been any in charge any time recently? The answer to that is very clearly no. Those guys, if you look at those boats that rolled up on Omaha Beach, they knew as soon as the fucking gate came down that they were gonna start getting smoked by MG42. They knew the machine gun fire was coming and they did it anyways. They were scared out of their minds and they did it anyways because they believed in the country. And that's really, in a lot of ways, all it takes is to believe in the country and behave as if you believe in the country. And it's what I, the quote I use all the time from GK Chesterton, who is an English author. He said that Rome, that men didn't love Rome because she was great, that Rome was great because they meant it loved her. That's the difference. Because people love things, take care of it. So take care of your country and take care of each other. - Yeah, and if you get a chance today, head on over to Black Rifle Coffee's feed. Jared, Matt's, Evan, and Tim Kennedy and those guys. - Tim, Andy Stumpf, Logan, all those guys are out there jumping. Are they, they've jumped? - They jumped. - Yesterday and today. - Yep, and then they landed on the beach is there and it was incredible footage, man. It was really, really fucking cool to see. So when those guys get back, we'll have them on the show to talk about their experience there. And I saw them, I forget whose Instagram it was, they were buying drinks for some of the old guys who were, for some of the old veterans from World War II that were on the flight back, who had flown over. So they were buying them a bunch of booze on the plane and cheers at each other and that was cool to see. But yeah, go to Jared or Evan Haefer's feed or Matt Best and those guys and look at that. Nick, I'm sorry, Tim Kennedy and those guys. And look at the footage 'cause it's incredible. Absolutely incredible. Can't wait to chat with them about it. Appreciate you guys tuning in. Go to iTunes, rate the show a five star and leave a quick review. Also, head on over to Spotify. It's just a five star. You can walk away with all the advertisers. Careabouts for Anthony, Anthony. Holloway, I'm Ross Patterson. This is Drinking Bros. Bank news. Good. (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music)
