Ladies and gentlemen, I am proud to tell everyone that this episode is brought to you by property win. Aaron from property win is an award-winning property agent you can trust. He has advice and transaction more than $30 million worth of property. With his vision of home ownership for all, you can put your trust in Aaron for all your property needs. Thanks to his meticulous work ethic and data-driven approach. Let property win. Keep your dream home a reality, follow him on Instagram at property win to get started. Bro, condos are so damn small nowadays. Why do people spend so much money on them? Right. You're right. So condos are indeed expensive and small. So consumers may purchase private properties, condos, because they want to try a new lifestyle. You'll be there. They want to have facilities in where they stay at or they want a gated community. However, there's also consumers who buy private properties as a way to hedge against inflation. They see it as a way to have false savings because they're paying mortgage and number two, because the prices of these properties tend to appreciate faster than HDB properties over time. Yeah. So that's why they actually look into private properties. Thank you, Aaron. Follow him on Instagram at property win to get started. Now let's get back to the episode. The more better podcast, ladies and gentlemen, we have returned to another episode of the more better podcast, as you can see, I'm at the peak of my health and why I'm at the peak of my health is the best time for me to promote shows. On August the 3rd, we will be at the S plenty. We got a couple of hundred more to sell. It's very close to me. So loud to be honest. And yeah, so if you guys haven't gotten your tickets to I Am Fuzzy Rashid, all the promos have been done. You've seen the videos. You've seen the clips. You know what's up. You've seen the articles. You've seen the articles. Everything's been out there. At this point, if you haven't got it, you should already have gotten it. If you haven't gotten it because you don't have the money, I suggest you rob someone. And no, no, we can't do that. I don't think you should. You shouldn't. We can't say that. What if the name was in the case, like, or they asked me to rob someone? Don't rob anyone. Beg someone. Is illegal to beg in this country? Yeah. Okay. Beg friends and family. I beg your friends. We cannot beg on the streets. That's also illegal. Don't beg on the streets. Beg to people. You know. Yes. For money to buy tickets for the August 3rd show. It's worth, you know. Wow. This guy. This guy. Look at this guy. Look at this guy. Suggest that you do something he never does. Look at this guy. Suggest that you do something. I do suggest that you do something. I've not worked for my money. Yeah. Yeah. But I got the money from doing work. Have you not been just living off your CDC vouchers? No. Yeah. Well, I was a host of shows. Oh, wow. That was hard. No. Yeah. Mostly shows. How much is sweat? That's the world. It's 10 whole minutes on stage. Anyways. August the 3rd. Yes. So, our take comes advice. Yeah. Right. Go find work. Yeah. Because, you know. I don't know if I don't know if this will help. But August the 3rd is also my last show in Singapore before I moved to Bali for three months. Sorry. You mentioned something. We'll get to that real quick. Okay. But we just finished this promo first. So August the 3rd. Get your tickets there. And it's Jackie's. What do you say? Last show. It's my last show in Singapore before I moved to Bali for three months. I want to be in Bali from 4th of August to 4th of November. Yeah. And if you're in Bali, you can get the tickets at whatever. Do you want to see Jackie's extended, like, kind of performance? We are doing a show. Yes. We are doing the Jackie and friends at the great Gilman Grilleau. Grilleau. Yeah. I do remember the... Yeah. That's in Tropicana. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Sorry. I didn't hear the last one. You mentioned it but I want to hear comes in. The great... Gilman Grilleau. That's right. The great Gilman Grilleau. The great Gilman Grilleau. Yeah. In Tropicana. On the 27th and the 28th of July. It's going to be a full day of festival. There's going to be like booths and stuff. Fit Monkey is there. They're selling sports bra. Yeah. And fitness where... Fit Monkey. Fit Monkey. Fit Monkey. And then there's going to be something. I think Daniel Sid is going to be doing a set. Not stand up. Daniel Sid is singing. I know. And then we are going to be doing comedy. Me, Calm, Jinx and Brie. Ooh. That's right. Very diverse line up for the end of July. July. Yes. On the 27th and 28th of July tickets, I literally just posted them in my telegram channel. Ah. Yeah. And if you want to join the telegram channel, how do you do that? Oh, go to telegram and then you type in a search about Jackie and friends. Yeah. That's the letter N, J-A-C-K-Y-N. Join the group. Friends. Join the group. And then, yeah, they are like... No, just for this show. It's like for any future Jackie and friends show or any Jackie show. And also, like, exclusive content. Like, I just bombed real high in the corporate recently. Nice. Life footage. (Laughter) That was the good shit, you know what I mean? Yeah. So, you got shows? Yes, sir. It worked. Of course. That's what I do. Because I got paid money to buy tickets for Father's Show. Wow. On the 6th of August. A couple of days after Father's Show. Mm-hmm. Right? If you saw me, if you see me, I'm hopefully open. If I don't die. Right. I will headline comedy masala on the 6th of August. Ooh. All right. It's at Circular Road, Heroes Bar. I've hit land there a couple of times and it's super fun. So, please come and I'll get tickets. Go to the link at comm6og.pthix.com. This is August, E-U-G-G-S-S-O-G, comm6og.pthix.com. And yeah, come through, it'll be fun. Hey, hosted by the masala resident, whole Sasha friend. Oh, it's going to be so fun, guys. It's going to be a fun, oh my god. Now I got my energy up. Yeah. It's going to be such a fun night. It will be. It will be. You know what's fun about that night? It's really the lead up to the... The whole show. The whole show. The lead up to the act. I don't promise anything before me, but when I go on, it'll be fun. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Can I just say that when the show starts, it's going to start with a bang. It starts with a bang. It's going to be great. If you're talking about warming the crowd up, right, that show has the exact recipe on how to do that with perfection. Yeah. Right. I think it's going to be a good show overall. Oh, no, it's going to be a hot crowd. You will leave the night and be like, oh, that was a fun night. Oh, man, it's going to be a hot crowd, but it's a you come on, you know what I mean? It's going to be so amazing. What do you mean, what? You don't believe in that? You don't believe in faith? I know that it will be a fun night. This is excitement. Like what? You can't be what you can't be excited with your nose is blocked. You can. Are you drinking warm water? No, I'm drinking vitamin C. Oh, that's pretty pink dotty boy. Oh, it's orange. Vitamin C is games or you're saying you're saying vitamin C is gay? I'm saying taking care of yourself. Yeah. And being gay is not a bad thing. Okay. So be straight me. See, I should be doubting what more whiskey. No, no, this is cool. That's right. You should be doubting more cool. If you win. If I was in gay, I was just like taking care of myself. That's right. Yeah. Fine. Okay. So that's not a show promos. Yeah. Okay, ladies and gentlemen, thank you for staying here after the show promos. I know we bouncing out in and out a lot. I'm not really in the best of hell right now because I decided to, you know, really exert myself to a point of fatigue. I did a whole month of Australian shows and then right after that, I jumped on a happy ever after thinking to myself that, oh, by the time I hit my August shows, I'm going to be sharp as shit. Turns out, no, turns out it's possible to overwork yourself to a point of sickness. Of course, when you're, especially when you're at the age, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. When you cross the threshold of youth, that's right. Yeah. They're sick very easily. Yeah, sure. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. I'm old guys. Okay. So, but you have a mandu. You have a mandu get red to like get better. Not if I die considering how old I am, right? That's what you do. How old I am, that's how time is running out for me. I might die at that time. Put in your willow. Who headlines? Who headlines for sure. Yeah. Cool. Yeah. Cool. Yeah. I just found out actually our friend, one of the comments, you know, I don't know if I should be naming them. No, no, no. Do wills. So you can go and look for them and then they will. That's wills. Yeah. They can help you write your will and like. I just heard. I just heard like CPF, you have to will your CPF to your, to your index of kinet. Yeah. Because you don't know the government takes you there. Exactly. So crazy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you have to do that. You know who gets it. You know what I mean. I thought the auto to like your child or your wife. No, because it can ease it like if you give it to your child, your wife can easily come back and then be like, yo, what the fuck? I don't know hierarchy, you know, like a wife first, then child, if not, then if you don't marry it. That's what I thought. That's what I thought. That's what I thought also. Cousens or whatever the fuck. No, I don't know. Cousens. Brother. Brother. Brother. Brother parents, you don't want. No, but you can, you can really do anyone you want. You could really do, I don't know, like a charity or whatever. But if not, if not, if not, also automatic, your will is gift to government. That's right. That's who you love the most. Yeah. Yeah. I'm willing to. You sing about police force. That's what I will do. Yeah. SF. You know what? You use that money to improve on when you want to give to the sale for police force. I'll give it to that. They can improve on their wife. Huh? I mean, you want to give to the sale for police force. Obviously, you want to see some improvements, right? With your money, right? Right. So what were you, they want, you want them to use your money to improve on? Irredicate gang violence. That's why I want to... That's, you can solve that with money. Yeah. You know, with your C.P.F. Right? You know, you cannot spend a set amount of money and say, "irredicate gang violence." So like, what are the actionable stats? Actionable stats. We are the money left by one. How would you change the uniform? Change the uniform. Yeah. I think the uniform is perfect. I honestly think they should go back to shorts. Yeah? Is it? Because like, there are Chinese people you talk to, right? When you say, "Last time, they were like, "Hey, fuck you, last time, last time, police made were shorts." They think that's fucking funny. So, if the policeman won't go back to wearing shorts, they will stop saying that. That's the first thing I would do if I had your money. You know? If I had... If my money, only 1% change the uniform. No, no, no. No, no, no. Fucking battalion. No, you get like, what you need to change the uniform. Yeah. Probably like, you get like, you know... The comms... The comms you need. The comms you need. The comms you need. The comms you need. The comms you need. The comms you need. The comms you need. The comms you need. The comms you need. But no division just has the comms shorts. You see, in my area, I get that. Not CCR. I don't see, I mean, are there... What's it got? Police, police, police. Police, police in my... And they see, and they see. Have you guys ever been screened by police officers before? No, that's not a... There's no smoke in the void deck or no. Okay, so you... Yes, you know. And I've been screened. I've been caught smoking on the void deck and littering, but I've never been screened, you know what I mean? Police officers catch you littering. No, no, no. There's any... Any of them. Yeah, yeah. No littering, they were like, screening you and she had it. No, police see me, they'll be like, "Hey, what's up?" Right, so they caught you first, they caught you for smoking? No, it wasn't? I don't think they caught me. I'm just sitting with my friends at a void deck and then they just came up to the table and like, I see, then they just, you know, they scan and then see whether you're clear or not. Right. So why would a child be wanted for anything? I mean, I was like early 20s, like I wasn't really a child, but I mean, it's just... In case you got extending warrants or something, maybe, or like your one-type percent or something. If you escape, and this is mostly the case. Yeah, escape, and this, you got... You never show up to court, you never be fine or whatever. They have all the data base. Right, right, right. Actually, at that point, I hadn't broken any loss. Have you screened anyone before? Yeah. I don't think I have. I haven't screened anyone. Is there one? I probably assisted in an arrest, but I've never really... I've assisted in an arrest. I've been doing this service. You go back to the unit to... In the unit to patrol. So, I've assisted in an arrest. I've handled a dead body before. Whoa. Yeah, and this guy... Yeah. I don't know if I've ever told you before. I don't know if I told you this story before, like, did they arrive there and this was a cool role. Like, his body is medical. It is the first time you ever see a dead body, like, in your face. And then... How long would you estimate the percent of the dead body? So what I didn't know is the blood just goes down to the base, bro, because it doesn't circulate anymore. So all the blood just goes down. Actually, for a fact, that's how they find out how long the percent has been dead. Yeah. By looking at where the blood is. Oh, yeah. Which position the blood is concentrated at. Also, they will know if the percent are in that position or they were dragged in from another position, depending on where the blood or pulls and so forth. Wow. So this guy was on the floor, under the block, at Queenstown area, and he's, like, bad. Like, cold, right? He's cold. And it is over there. And tongue-eye already arrived. So the police arrive and I'm like, by that time, I'm like, just fully, like, stunned. And I've never seen the dead body, like, the fresh dead body would just die. I arrived there. And then the tongue-eye guys come and they were, like, handling the body. And then the tongue-eye, he took out his cigarette. And he was like, "Yo, it's like, no cigarette. It's like, no cigarette." And the fuller, it is pocket, got a cigarette, but then he looked at him and said, "I take water." Yeah. The one. That's for Michena. Yeah. I mean, and also he is going to be helping the guy with the rest of his journey. The least you can do is, like, minus or 50 cents from his, uh, CEO, you know what I mean? You should wield those secrets, right? Governmentate the secret through it. Governmentate the secret, though. But say, in a way, government did take the secret. Because by the way, it was a hired by the government. Right. So they are, like, the number one cascade company I don't know. Who is the company? Who is the company? Who is the company? The company. Yeah. It's the company. Yeah. Imagine the guy who, like, started it and then, like, you want to show me the government. I don't think it's a person's name. It could be. It sounds like a... I think it could be two people's name. Oh. That's why it sounds like to me. Mr. Thong. Mr. Eich. Yeah. Is Eich a surname? Eich is actually a name. Oh, okay. By a very old, old generation name. I don't think it could be a surname. Thong could be a surname. Yeah. Mr. Thong. Are they handled all, like, races? They want them, like, Melida? No, no, no, no. I mean, they don't do anything except, like, take the body out somewhere else. You're trying to take the body out, like, bury all that, as well. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They won't bury others. Do you think the undertakers just, like, handle the body until somebody else takes over? No, I think... I think they can handle it out for you all the way until you're cremating. Yeah. I think, in Islam's case, like, there are more steps than you. You probably need more specialized people. Yeah, we need an actual, like, Ustrada. Hey, look at the body. He's like, "I don't know. This one is Islam or not, bro." How do you know? (speaks in foreign language) Check the cock... (laughter) (speaks in foreign language) Wow. Wow. (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) You can tell one. Oh, (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) So, then sex, I think. (speaks in foreign language) No, no, sex. No, no, sex. (speaks in foreign language) Yeah, yeah. Well, they're circumcised. How's their circumcision? (speaks in foreign language) Probably the same level. (speaks in foreign language) Yeah. (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) Can they go to, like, a Muslim? (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) Can they go to a Muslim doctor to synthesize as well? No, but the thing is, the Muslim doctor will always convert you. Yeah, it's fine. It's fine, right. When it comes to Islam's religion, it's very ritualistic. It's not just a medical procedure. Damn. (speaks in foreign language) God punish me for that question with the sneeze. Yeah. (speaks in foreign language) And you gotta have rundown every time you circumcise after, right? You gotta have, no, you gotta have rundown. And you gotta rub it on your dick. Wow. That's like, God. You gotta have rundown. (speaks in foreign language) Just to see if you're really Muslim or not. (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) Have you seen Hindu rundown? (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) We don't acknowledge that, bro. (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) Yeah, and they're Jewish. So that proves that, right? (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) (speaks in foreign language) Yeah, yeah. I think you don't buy kobuki, right? - Yeah, I've never had kobuki in a long time, actually. - No, but you were saying that you were wrapped written down on the cock after the circumcision to prove whether you're really muslim. That was what you said. - Somebody listening on the bus ride, I was going, "All right, that's the point that I leave this for, guys." All right, 15 minutes in, these guys are talking bullshit, but what happens if you're really muslim? You'll be like, "Yo, that's how you know if it's really muslim." - Yeah, I'm not gonna say it. - Any other words, if I say like, "Hey, yeah." - Let me join Jackie in this part. - Why, why, why? - That's what happens when they run down. - When, after they all go, "What, what, what, what?" - Well, how did you, you know, I didn't buy yourself as a muslim when you were circumcised? - Until today, I think like I talked to you and Sarah, when we had the part, at the time, I don't remember getting circumcised. - But I am circumcised. - I was just born muslim. - I just cannot remember. - No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. - My theory is it was so traumatizing that like, they're blocked out of my head. - My theory is you are made out of foreskin. - Ahh, it's all foreskin. - It's all foreskin. - You are all foreskin. - That's, it can be the only person that doesn't remember their circumcision day. - Yeah, I mean, but, but people do some parents who just cut it when they are, the kid is born and are right. Like that's the least traumatizing. - I like, I, I, I, technically, I shouldn't be a baby, so then it's. - Maybe you were, you were a baby when that happened. - Yeah, I can remember, but like, so then they probably got it done while you were a baby. - But I will, in the, in the movie show, it's like a couple of like movies. - Yeah, in the movie, when they do, you know, there's always a comedy scene where like the young boys are getting circumcised. - Oh, they do it in a couple of months. - Yeah, yeah. - It's a comedy scene. - And like, a lot of comedy scenes. - 'Cause it's hilarious, bro. - Yeah, okay. - And then level, they're in the movie boys' blood. - Fucking shaking. - 'Cause they'll be shaking. - And they'll be aligned. - They see like, it's an assembly hall. - Oh, they're with a kite. - Oh yeah, they all take turns, you get circumcised. - It's all one big thing. - And I always thought, I don't even remember any of that. - You probably didn't go through it. - You probably hadn't done it when you were a baby. - Yeah, maybe. - But those, those sessions are probably, yeah. - But I found out they were being babies. I didn't see any of the money, yeah. - Best money? - I didn't even give money. - I didn't even give money. - You don't give money? - No, no, no, no. - Nobody gives money, bro. - You didn't use this information. - That's why I just thought like. - You just thought and you assume that you thought and you disappointed yourself over things that aren't even facts. You'd be disappointed yourself over non facts. - Every little celebration thing of money. - I didn't really see any of the cash. - There's no cash. - No one, yeah. - I swear there is. - There's no cash. - Somebody gives someone money at some point. - Okay, maybe that. Maybe like, that could be like, give one power. - One thing one, two dollars. - Like give one power type, that's shit, right? - Maybe you better. - Yeah. I would assume it would be something. - Maybe it's some family settings that would do that. - Yeah, why don't you reckon. - You don't have to deal with it. - Yeah, yeah. - Oh yeah, you're doing with it though. What is it? - Doctor, Doctor Zyla. - Zyla, yeah. - I didn't get any of the money. - Shit, yeah. - So when you were in Malacca, you were just rocking your foreskin. - No, I was in Malacca. - When I was in Malacca, I was rocking out with my cock. - No, actually I have seen these kind of ritual ceremonies in Malacca, where like a bunch of boys they sit there, and they call it to a mood team, they'll come in. And I don't know how they cut it, but like, you know, there's a lot of like bamboo involved. - What? - Yeah. - Very like, you don't have vaccination centers, you went to for COVID. It's like that. But it's for cutting for stuff. But by the way, it's in a kind. - What are old Chinese traditions, right, that you still see being practiced today when it comes to like chalbuh? - Oh, chalbuh? - Yeah, like chalbuh. - Like chalbuh. - Like chalbuh, baby, chalbuh. - Well, they will cut the baby's hair after one month, because they think that they will help the hair grow better, more smoothly. My cousin or my mom said, she's Indonesian, and she went to New Zealand, and she married a New Zealander, then they had a baby, and they brought the baby back to the kampung in Indonesia. - It is a baby boy, baby girl. - Baby girl. - Oh, kept it alive. Nice. - Yeah, but from New Zealand. - Indo-New Zealand. - Okay. - Went back to New Zealand. - Chinese. - Okay. - Chinese. - Chinese. - Chinese. - Yeah, I have to keep alive. - Her husband is New Zealander, and then when they brought the baby back, my grandma just like invited all the friends over, like, "Yo, the baby's here, let's cut the baby's hair." They were like, "Yeah!" - Cut the baby's hair. - 'Cause it's one man Ola. - Wow. - It's one man Ola. - Wow. - It's one man Ola. - Wow. - It's one man Ola. - Wow. - It's one man Ola. - Wow. - It's one man Ola. - Wow. - It's one man Ola. - Wow. - It's one man Ola. - Wow. - Yeah. - Wait, do we shave it bald too? - I don't know. - You know, we have the hair shaving ceremony also for babies, you know that- - Too cool. - Yeah. - Too cool. - You know that, right? - I think so. I can't remember that. - Yeah, you've never been to any of those ceremonies. You've never been to a Chukorambur, right? You've never been, wait. Do they still do that? No, they still do that, right? Chukorambur for babies. Did they not do that? Is he a pal? - It's right. - They do lie. - I know no, I'm sure they do. - It's not too much. - It's not too much. - I say, let me say, I know that it exists. - I don't think I've been. - Okay, okay. I might be able to one or two. I think it's Chukorambur, together with a whole bunch of, like, it's like a choir of my cheeks. - A choir? - It's a choir. - So they all sing. - They, you call it sing, but it's like religious chants, religious chants. - Yeah. - So they were just go there and they were like, you know, say prayers for the baby and they'd be like, yo, this baby, you shave the hair. I don't know what the significance of that is, like, please don't add me, or- - Okay, comment me for this shit. - You don't even know the name of the song. - Yeah, yeah. - We also, you know, Banga Wan Solo does the baby shower vouching. - Banga Wan Solo. - The King Bliss? - Yeah, the King Bliss. - So, no, so what? - So, Banga Wan Solo. - Banga Wan Solo. - Banga Wan Bang Bang Bang. - Banga Wan Solo. - Banga Wan Solo. - Banga Wan Solo. - Banga Wan Solo. - Banga Wan Solo. - So they're all off for the show, shout out. - Banga Wan Solo, so, like, people that want to have baby showers, but they don't have the facilities or the resources to have a proper baby shower, you can go to Banga Wan Solo. And then, like, buy that. - No, buy the vouchures. So you buy, like, a stack of vouchures, and then you give it out to your friends, and then your friends can go to Banga Wan Solo and you claim a click for free, and then you all eat a kick to celebrate the babies, whatever. - I've never really had any Banga Wan Solo kick to be honest. - Wow. - Well, maybe it's time for you to Santa Sam Banga Wan Solo. - Yeah, I'm also responsible for this app, but I'm okay with, like, baby showers, but that's, like, that makes sense, like baby showers, but, like, what I don't really dig is, like, when the ladies still pregnant and we do gender reviews, like, really could not be fucked up. - Well, this is a cultural thing. It's just, like, it came from, like, America and the West, somebody wanted to be here. - Yeah, it's so dumb for me to sit there and be like, "It's a boy! Who gives a fuck?" Like, you know, like, I don't care. - Your friends who are giving both give a fuck. - Yeah. - That's why you're there. - Like, like, like, what's this born, and then I know what it is, and then we'll work from there, you know? Like, I don't like if it's still in the, it's still in the belly for you to be like, "It's a boy!" - Yeah, but you're kind of confident that the baby will be born. - Wow. - Yeah. - That was nice for you. - It's for you to prepare buying the gifts and the baby's born. - Oh, yeah. - Like, if you know it's a boy, then you can go and buy some hot wheels. If you know it's a girl, you can go buy a barbie toy, you know, you're like, "Oh, my God, what do I buy? What do I buy?" Then you fucking buy some voucher. - I mean, no, this is my white color. - It's my white color. - What's that? - Nowadays, we can't even do that. We can't even, like, if it's a boy, we buy hot wheels, you know what I mean? - Okay. - The boy's like, right? - See, I was celebrating the baby being born and the baby being one years old. But, like, if I'm going to sit there and, like, pretend I care about whether or not it's a boy or a girl, then it's just, like, why am I, what am I... - I also think it's that over time, people are just looking for more reasons to celebrate law. - Yeah. And then, they just gave birth and they fucking hired a photographer to come to the house to take pictures of the baby. The baby was asleep, but maybe, but they put a baby in pizzas. - The baby can be fucked, that right? - The baby can be fucked. - The baby can be fucked. - The baby didn't even know what was going on. - But, but it was, it's so clear that the baby was asleep, but it just, like, dressed it up. - Yeah. - Yeah. So, like... - Not any celebration until the age of, I would say, four is for the parents. - Yeah. - It's not for the kid or the baby at all. - Yeah. - So, first of the day, he doesn't remember the first of the day. - First of all day, I kind of get it, it's like, yeah, we kept it alive for a whole year, guys, take it out. - Yeah, again, it's for the parents. - It's for the parents. So, I am willing to have that celebration for like... - I also have it, McDonald's, so I can have the cake. - That's all I want. - Yeah. - No, McDonald's cake? - Yeah. - I've never had it. - 'Cause you can't like buy it. - You can't buy McDonald's cake. You gotta like, keep it out for a celebration, then they give you a cake. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah. - I've been to my cousins, no waiting, no waiting, I went to my cousins birthday once, so we were like kids, and then she had divorced parents, and then the father came, because the father didn't get custody, the mom got custody, so we were celebrating at McDonald's and then the father showed up, and the father was like, what the hell's going on? And they were like, oh, we're celebrating her birthday, and then the father said, are you guys nuts? Are you guys crazy? Her birthday is not for another week. - Why are we celebrating her birthday right now at McDonald's? - So what did he show up? He was just little bio, big make-up. - No, no, no, no, no. So they all lived in the same area, so they all lived in the same area. - Oh, so we were at McDonald's. - So let me tell you, sorry, we at Queen Star McDonald's, right? And everybody says that, okay, it comes down to my, you know, like female cousins of our birthday, so we were kids, right? So we were like, yeah, we're playing the games and everything, having a great time, right? And then I hear somewhere that like, oh, no, her birthday is like the week after that, we're celebrating it first, because that's why we can't get everybody together. - Yeah, normally. - Then the father just happened to be there, but the father just went there to buy a big bank. - Okay. - The father was also living around the area. The father walked around, the father was like, hey, it's a bunch of money. I mean, that's my kid, right, and then you walk around and say, what's going on? And then somebody says, oh, it's his birthday, and they say, and he yells, like, are you guys crazy? Her birthday is next week. You guys don't even know her, is that you guys don't even know her, and you got custody of her? - No, it is. - And then the uncle is not coming out. Hey, you step out of this, you step out of this, it's not her birthday, it's not her birthday. And then, and then my auntie comes out, and my auntie doesn't even know what's going on. My auntie was like, no, not him, and it starts crying. Starts crying, bro. I say, oh, this is true, bro. Starts crying, right? I'm a kid. I'm going, like, what the fuck is going on? - Right? - And then he's going, he's standing there, he's going, he's just not her birthday. And then everybody say, hey, calm down, calm down. The week out, it's not her birthday. And then the clown that was entertaining us, broke character, I can't, I can't, I can't. So we over there with our balloon, haven't made it to animal yet, bro. - He's a long balloon. - He's a long balloon. - He's a long balloon. I was like, what are the long balloons? - Yeah, I guess he's a snake. - Yeah. - Yeah, he's a snake. - Yeah. - And then, and then the argument with the uncle's are like almost five, so I'm like, are you all about there? It's all about there. I'm like, you shut up. Wait, what now? I don't know about there. They just fought. And they say, I don't know why he's such a big, like, yeah, like, I don't celebrate the Oh my actual birthday. - No, because he didn't get custody of my cousin. - Yeah. - So, so he's like, a man, I was to celebrate her birthday on her birthday. - Yeah. I don't know if you get her on the birthday. - Yeah. - And that's why we can't do it on her birthday because she's hanging out with you. You fuck. - Yeah. - Yeah, I mean, it's, I want to be a part of this. - Yeah. - I think that's why. - I just say you fell left out, dude. - Yeah. - He hid it in this veil of like, it's the her birthday. - But I bet the uncle know he lose right when auntie say, not this guy, like the one you. - Bro, I swear, when I think I'm out, never even said that he saw him because I'm like, "No!" Bro, go sir. Do you mind me? Please? No! And then my mom is like, okay. You know, and then my dad is like, "We need to beat someone up." - Oh, you. Dude, I was like, nine? - Okay. - This was like way before my whole time. - No, no, no, but it was a, it was a, it was a, um, uh, queen's town. - Yeah. - Shut up, the next queen's town made orders on a lot of memories there. - Yeah. - Yeah. - A lot of your memories are made in queen's town. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - The body. - The body. - Yeah. - The body. - The body. - The body and the dead relationship. - Farted. - Farted. - Farted. - And the funny thing is you actually saw this same uncle. So we, you remember when we went to, uh, he shouldn't and you and I had like, uh, brother. - Oh my god. - Yeah. - And then some guy came. - Yeah. - And some guy said hi. - Yeah. - And then I saw him the full, uh, because I just had to saw him the full and then he walked away and you were like, "Who's there?" I was like, "Okay, that's my law." It's that guy. - Oh my god. - It's that guy. It was that guy. - I remember there was a time where you were like, "I was there also." And it was an uncle who was there and you're like, "If I'm an uncle there." - Not really an uncle, like kind of an uncle, I guess. - Mm-hmm. - Yeah. - Wow. - Bro, he was there. But like, he was buffered back then. You know, he was like, "Oh, now he's an uncle. But that was buffered." And imagine all his like BS, you know, Malimago, who she's yelling like, "It's not a buffered again. You don't get into this." - If I was present, I would fuck with this guy just by like every year now, one week before he would, "Hey, wait a minute. We'll celebrate." - It's not a buff day. - I got super mad. Like that's that kind of family drama. I was like, "Yo, oh my god. You bring back some good memories there, bro." - Yeah. - Yeah, that's a good memory. Have you ever witnessed like a full on adult fight as a kid? - Adult fight is a ignore fight. - At that point, my uncle disappeared a couple of times. But that's because I think he went to prison. - Yeah. - But then that thing. But you cannot verify it. - I cannot. 'Cause he was there with us. But he disappeared for like five, six years. - Okay. - And he showed up and then our stuff started disappearing. - So fucked up. - But I was never there to see like my, I did my grandma or my mom scold him. - Okay. - But I know they were pissed because they would like talk to me and he's back. Like he didn't even, like, you know. - Right. - Or not grateful that we bring him back. - Yeah. If you ever go to higher eye to like one person's house and then that person has like a special child. - Oh, no. I don't know. - Okay. - All right. All right. - Yeah, tell us. - Tell us this amazing story about this cousin. - So, nephew. - No, no, no, no. I'm not gonna say who it is. This is house I go to a higher eye. A lot. I go to a lot of higher eye. I think the whole, I think the- - Was they second day? - No, no, no. I'm not gonna say anything. I'm not gonna say anything but it's a house I go to the higher eye. It's a house I go to the higher eye. I'm not gonna say if they relate to the higher eye. You don't know. You don't know who these people are. Okay. I mean, this is a fictional family. Okay. It's a, might be a fictional family. Might not be. I don't know. - Yeah. - They're like, "Hey, they're mothers, they're great." They didn't really hit them. The mom's condition is her eyes are Googly herself. And like, like, my Googly, like her eyes are, bro, eyes are massively Googly. Like, when she talks to you, like, all over the place, like, "Hey, I'm not kind." You know, so. - Okay. - And the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the dad is just a sniffy pachis. - Okay. Like, you right now. - Like, a grunty pachia. - No, but a grantee, you know what that's kind of like, grantee patchy, it's just grantee and cousin. - I don't know. - You know what that's kind of, like, yeah. - Yeah, it's like, oh, like, they're just, right? So they are like too, like-- - That is the full of that was salam, and then they take their head away. - Ah, it's just gotta be, but it's just gotta be, you know what I'm saying. - Take away 'cause it's funny. - No, no, they don't use to touch them too long, so like, salam, and they just do. - Yeah. - You, you would still be there, but they would just like, because they are germaphobic, no, they're just-- - They're just homophobic. - Oh, oh. - So they're cooking. - As soon as the kid's viral thing, that's why. - I'm sure you're all happy it's July. - So, so we got a googly eye, wife, and then the husband said that, kids, two kids, no more, one kid, got different hair color than the rest of the kids. - Oh, all right, they bright it? - Ah, that's like an iron deficiency. - They didn't die, they didn't die, but like, that, that, that, like, so I don't even know what condition they did, but it's one of those ur ones, you know? - So, - Hot-R? - Ah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Okay, ur with a hot-R, right? So it's a mess, like, full-R. - Yeah, but is it like a red hair? - Red hair, right? I think red hair is like an iron deficiency. - Is it? - That's why I learned when I was a kid, when I went to Cambodia. C.I.P. trip, and then a lot of kids had red hair, and they were like, it's-- - So, I remember my mom telling me, my mom was like, you know, you should, you shouldn't laugh. I know that as a kid, maybe you don't understand this, but you shouldn't, like, because the mom suffered some kind of trauma, and that's why she turned out that way, so you have to cussure them, and you have to show them sympathy and empathy. Now, look at my mom, I was like, you couldn't just get shocked a little bit when you were pregnant with me, so that I would get that hair? (laughing) - You want the red hair? - I told her, I said, why didn't you just shock like a little bit, and my mom was like, fuck it's wrong with it. (laughing) - Not thinking back, I've said some well shit. - Of course, you know what I mean, right? - Yeah, I told my mom, that's my mom, my mom told my dad, you know what he said? (laughing) He said, why couldn't I just get shocked a little bit, and then he said, because, is this your child? - But it's no concept of humor in your mom's life before that, right? - Nah, nah, nah, nah, I gotta proper snap. - Okay. - And I think that made my hair lost. - Nah, we know why. - We know why. - We know why. - Yeah. - No, no, you don't have relatives out of that. Like, what's the, you've never been to a house where? - No, I mean, I think it's all been, ever since I was born, I think most of the people in my family get along. But then now that I'm getting older, some people will tell me stories from before I was born. - Yeah. - Oh yeah, me being like, at family events, but not present, I kinda zone out and do now, and then here and there, they would just talk, I was like, oh, this drama happened, and I'd be like, wait, what happened? I always miss out on all the best shit - Right. - And then, so like, yeah, like even with like, when you say what, special kids, what do you want? - Yeah, thankfully, like February has just been like pretty healthy issue. - I went to this, I went to this girl's house before when I was in primary school. - Isn't it a house? - I'm relaxed, I went to this girl's house before when I was in parents there. - No. - Okay, again, it's a Chinese girl. So I went to this Chinese girl's house, I was probably five, right? I went to a house, I didn't share the shit. I was younger. - February 5th, I February 5th. - You know what? - She was 31. (laughing) - Oh, okay. (laughing) - Wait, someone says that. - Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. - Why he hates women so much? - No, no. - When he meets treats. - That's not true. - No, that's not true. - Okay. - She was also February 5th, same class. - Same class. - Same class. - Oh, she was in the bright line. - What do you mean, like we were in Singapore? - Yeah, so February 5th. - February 5th. - Yeah, it's a good school. - Yeah, it's a good school. - It's a good school, Marty. - Oh, yeah. - So we were there, and she had a baby sister, and then we were watching the show. We were watching a horror show. It was the middle of the day. And then the baby sister don't know how to speak English yet. We only know how to speak Mandarin. So she looks at me and she takes the cover of this horror film that has a monster on it. And then she says, "Yao Xinya, Yao Xinya, Yao Xinya." So, so I thought Yao Zuo, like, he wants to eat me. But then she said, "Yao Xinya, she eat wants to chew you to death." So I didn't know which one to react to, like, does he want to eat me or chew me to death? You know what I mean? Like, because one is really intent to kill. The other one is for sustenance, right? So I didn't know how to fucking-- - Either way, you died, though. - Yeah, I know, but I did that. She goes, "Yao Xinya, Yao Xinya, Yao Xinya, let's see, look at me." Now, like, she tries to get, "Yao Xinya, Yao Xinya, it's like, "Yao Xinya, you're put on." (laughs) Yeah, so that happened. - I see. - Yeah, that's a vague memory. - I still have no idea what that, all that meant. - Yao Xinya, Yao Xinya, the inside. - Put on, what's put on? - Put on means don't know. - Oh. - Yeah, you don't know. - I don't know, as in don't know, Chinese. - Like, you don't understand what's going on right here. - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Is you all trying to make you like-- - Yeah, but I'm quite scared. - Yeah, but why would you in a Chinese ghost house in the middle of the day, like, you'll skip school to watch horror movie? - Yeah. - Wow. - Yeah. - It's pretty gangster, isn't it? - 75. - Actually, 11 years old. - Actually, not skip school. School finish, but I never go home. - Oh. - My parents are home. Oh, they're kind of like the parents go home, and then she would, until the mom comes back. - I was just hanging out, what do we want to feel? And then, like, a couple of other friends came, so it's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Are you with that first one? 'Cause you're with the same class you all left together. - Yeah, pretty much. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - No, no. Why bro? Why are we fucking that girlfriend? Yeah, we're from one. Let me do anything. That's your boyfriend. But like, you know, we're like... Can they have a pookee? Whoa, what? That's what kids call them. Yeah, that's what they call pookee. The old P-I-O-K-I-E. That's right. Yeah, pookee. That's my pookee. Whoa. Your P5 pookee. Huh? Your P5 pookee. Wow, that's what... No, that's what P4. Your P... What? Oh, that's what P4. Yeah, that's what P5. That's what you call it. That's some messed up shit. That's so stupid. Okay, I think we need a segment like that. Yeah, we have no way we are running out of. We are running on a shit to talk about. Thank you so much for still tuning in. Wow. Yeah, thank you so much for still tuning in, guys. I'm sorry. I'm not in the best of shape. I would promise not to overwork myself. However, we are powering through. Of course. We are powering through with our segment. It's that segment, right? It's the favorite segment of it, right? Yeah. What's it called? It's your favorite segment called... But no, it's not. Ladies and gentlemen, I am proud to tell everyone that this episode is brought to you by Property Win. Aaron from Property Win has an award-winning property agent you can trust. He has advice and transacted more than $30 million worth of property. With his vision of home ownership for all, you can put your trust in Aaron for all your property needs. Thanks to his meticulous work ethic and data-driven approach. Let Property Win make your dream home a reality. Follow him on Instagram @PropertyWin to get started. I heard that you can upgrade your home without even using your savings. Does that make any sense? Yeah. So it is possible for you to upgrade your current home to a more expensive form without using your personal savings. How? When you sell your current property, you get back all the CPF you have used towards the house, back your own account. Wherever cash that you have paid to the house, which is principal, you also get it back. On top of that, you also get the profit. Hopefully, no, your property price increase, you get that profit. And with that lump sum of money, you can use it towards the down payment of your second house. And you still need a loan, of course. If you need a loan, you still get a loan. So that's how you actually upgrade from a smaller or less expensive property to a bigger one. Thank you, Aaron. Follow him on Instagram @PropertyWin to get started. Now let's get back to the episode. Hey, today, don't play player. Why you don't play player? You see what's over to player, bro. Can you come close to me? You work? Good enough. You never buy my fucking umbrella and then it's been raining all day. You're out in the fucking wilderness and it rains. That's why you're safe because you can now. You're on a trip with your family and you really upset with them because they're not treating themselves well. And you're like, "Fucking dead. Do I have to do anything?" Make sure your mum and dad, you will. Good enough. Good enough. Sorry, that's my bad. No, not the right. I just said, "Just delete the way you work." No, your parents are. Okay. Good enough. Yes. When you're in... You got accused, we got the ace. Yeah. Is that what you're not? The Konami? Q&A. Q&A, yeah. Q&A, fucking nads. All right. Let's hit the questions. Let's go. Charles Angelo asks, "Will any of y'all run for a president and what policies will you have?" Okay. What policy? Follow it. Presidents don't have policies. You dumbass. When do you know? Charles Angelo. Do you have no fucking idea how the Singapore political system works? Do you? Okay. The president doesn't implement policies. The president just safeguards the reserve. Yeah. Okay. The people that do policies are ministers. Okay. The prime minister. Right. That's why you're asking Angelo. Yeah. And since he didn't ask it correctly, we're not going to answer any more. This is what I'll do if I'm president. I will say stuff on TV, like gang gang, okay? You know, you'll be like, "Yo, Malaysia just agreed to do this policy with us, gang gang." Yeah. You know? Hey man, if you guys want to go to JB today, I'll be there to gang gang. I'll just keep on saying gang gang and make it like... I think that your security guys will be upset if you tell people you go in JB. You know what I mean? Everybody's going to go and then, like, chalk up the fucking causeway and shit like that. You know? There's a few things that follow you everywhere. Yeah, right. I will go to all the sporting events. I will totally run for president because I really want to sit on the president's seat during NDP. That is the best... The NDP is the best show Singapore has to offer. No, but I have to make empty conversations. I want them to... I want them to just... I want them to ask me, can I have your permission to march past and march off the parade. So... And I'll be like... What happens if the president just says no? No, no... Then they have to stay there until he says yes or no. Yeah, it just goes on. Dance for me. Dance for me. Dance for me. I don't know. Make a TikTok first then we can go. I like it when, like, it's a Navy contingent and then, like, there's one brown person there and the president, like, purposely stops at the brown person and goes like, "It cannot." Do you think that's what they're saying? Do you think that's what they're saying? You think that's what they're saying? I'm proud you made it. They stopped. They stopped. Like, they were always stopping. Like, you look at, like, every time there's, like, a Navy or commando where you know that there's supposed to be a majority of one demographic in there and then there's, like, a... There's the odd one out. So, man, Halima also had a female one? Yeah. Usually. But also, I honestly think that when you're looking at the Army and the Navy and the Air Force as a whole, there is a good number of different races in the entire company. And that number is seven? No. I think that because not... You cannot be a pilot. We all know that. But there are a lot of things that York can do. As long as you are willing to not eat in a non-house of house. So, where is the top of the fuel? Exactly. All of these things. Someone saw the boxes. So, it really shouldn't be that surprising when you see a brown skin person wearing a Navy or Air Force uniform anymore. Yeah. But it still is, though. I mean, they usually put it in front of the contingent. They're like, "Yo, yo." It's a lot. Listen, we've all been part of the... And, like, an Army or police or whatever. Mm-hmm. It's whatever to make them look good. They'll put up upfront, right? Yeah. That's what the sergeant will be. If it's for a parade that has people from the outside, they'll put a buffer sergeant. Yeah. Let's do the boost up the look of the parade. Yeah. It's a parade. Yeah. So, if you guys around the city hall area, uh, on a weekend... Yeah. You're going to watch the fireworks? I know. It's going to be so fucking crowded. I love watching, like, NDP rehearsal, right? Because, like, important people aren't there. Because it's a rehearsal. Yeah. Then it'll be, like, some random, like, volunteer, then wearing a sign that says, "President Halima." Then, like, just, like, raving. [laughter] How are we there, guys? I want to be the, uh, step-in president. Yeah, not the actual president. Yeah. You know, like, the backup, uh, the backup to the cast. What's it called? Uh, uh... Just stand by. Stand in. It's, it's, like, the understudy. Understudy. Yeah. I want to be president's understudy. Understudy. Like, Halima, see that day? I'll be president now. I practice all the time. Well, it's time, sorry. Yeah. I mean, I'm talking about it in a day. Catch up. Never recognize it. [laughter] A twig asks, "Jackie said he was shaved when he turned 30. How come still never?" Oh, my god. Oh, my god, did you say that? Oh, you said that? Did you say that? No, I'm not going to do it anymore. What? I was considering, this is what I say last time. Like, I would shave when I turned 30, so that, like, I would, like, look young again. Right. So, your white hair? Okay. Technically, if I shave my hair, it's like a white hair, right? If I shave bald, will it grow up black? Or would the white one stay white? Stay white. Stay white. Oh, that's it. But I like the salt pepper. Salt pepper. Sure. Actually, it's grown more in these two years, sir. Yeah. Yeah, that's why I'm pepper. Stress, bro. Okay. Stress. Working too hard. Working too hard, right? Long bays. Bro, you will, like, two whole days a week, man. That must be tough, bro. Two whole hours a week. Let's see what you want. That's double what I've been working for a lot over my life. Yeah. That's crazy. Working twice as hard. That's why I say it. I didn't say how many times. Say twice as hard. Honestly, one of the reasons why I haven't shaved is because my girlfriend, she means she's very uncomfortable. If you're bald. We're talking about this. We're not talking about this. We're talking about my facial hair. She thinks that I would look like a completely different person when I shave and then she will feel like she's cheating on me. Nice. Nice. Yeah. For the thrill, baby. Just do it. We'll test it out with a filter. No, no, we will keep it. We will keep it until we need that trula. You know what I mean? Why would I... Why would I expose that car? We'll use a shave for all the service. Well. Yeah, right. I don't know if I should be saying this on air, but I will. The last few vis-a-vis I had was semi-COVID times. So I wear a mask everywhere. I go. Oh, actually that's good. Yeah. Then the last one, I told them I had to keep it for a roll and they were like, "Okay." I mean, you did. I remember the roll that you had to keep it for. Yeah. But the next one, I really don't know if they're going to let me keep this, but like, we'll see that. I think the roll is still going on. I think the thing is, I cannot keep this. I cannot pass you about this part really. Oh, wait. That's uniform still. You can keep your mustache. Yeah. That's not your beer. Yes. But you cannot have this. So I will shave my goatee for my next vis-a-vis most likely. More ballet. But then what about young Mr. Miyagi? Like, you know, that's the room you're still playing. Well, we'll see if they renew the season. Yeah. Yeah. That's 15 more seasons of that. Yeah, but it's also like filming schedule. What's that called? What's that? How many more cycles have? Seven more. Seven more seasons of that. Yeah, of young Miyagi. Then you have to play. And then you have to play a full chow from Shaolin Monk. I don't know. Woof. Yeah. Yeah. Then how? Then, I mean, I honestly don't need that long to grow this. Right. This can grow out within a week. Right. Like this. I'm actually quite a cap now. This is like not shaving for a month. Cool. Yeah. Next question. Yes, please. that RTLHVM asks, "Who is your celebrity crush?" - Whoa. - Damn, man. - All time, okay, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. - Yeah, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. - Yeah, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. - Yeah, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. - I don't know, like, is it specific to women? - Who's the celebrity crush that you finally realized that, oh, I'm into women. - What? - Oh, right, the moment where I realized that. - The people teed out, the people teed out. - Oh, shit, I feel like this type of girls, I would say the Spice Girls, the first time I saw the Spice Girls, it was on, it was on CD and then they like, you know, I was flipping the pages and I saw them in sexy outfits. - All of them, just particularly. - All of them, and then I saw that, I didn't know, like, how to process it, I was like a kid, I was like 11, looking at like, "Oh, they can dress like that." So then I went to my mom and I said, "Can I have all of the Spice Girls stuff?" - Because I want to see more Spice Girls. - Yeah. - And then, I don't know why I just enjoyed it, right? So last time they had the Spice Girls Fat Card, bro. So like, they're not easily covered. Fat Card. So I would go to the uncle and I was a kid. I go to the uncle, you have a Spice Girls, then the uncle was like, "Why you want this?" - You boy? - Yeah, I'd say like, because I like Spice Girls. I like Spice Girls. You like the music or you like the people. I don't know yet. - Boy, tell me what you want. - Say that, tell me what you want. And he's a mother of a girl, and I said, "Ah, super music, so go around here." And I was like, "Tatauji?" - I just know I like it. - I thought, she bought me Spice Girls, Spice Girls, Spice Girls, and then I told my auntie, my auntie, my auntie, my auntie, I told my auntie, I said, "Can I have $16 on to buy Spice Girls CD, Spice Girls CD, it's a lot of money." - Yeah, no, no, no, no. - And then, she was like, "Okay, we'll go there." And then she saw the Spice Girls. She's like, "Ah, no, that was CD Ramas." - CD Ramas, she went there, and then she saw, she was like, "Why do you like, like, I don't know, especially pumpkins or something?" - I was like, "I don't know, I just, I don't know yet why I like Spice Girls." And then one time I was watching him with my uncle, and I was literally like, "You have no idea, you haven't reached puberty yet, you're 11, you're watching it, you're taking it yourself. I just enjoyed it so much. I don't know why." - My uncle was like, "You see the breast you like, right?" - Then it clocked like, you know, hit. - Then it clicked. - Then it clicked. - It clicked. - It got there. - Wow. - Oh. - Well, no. - Okay, well, at that point, I didn't like, that's the point where I changed, and I was like, "Okay, you know." - I'm surprised that you're not into, like, K-pop. You know what I mean? That was like, pretty much like K-pop. - But when he was a child, there's no, there wasn't K-pop. - No, no, no, he didn't like, grow into, grow into. - Like, in girl groups. - No, that was like, no. - That's it, like, 'cause after Spice Girls, there wasn't a D, any. - There wasn't a D, any one. - That's any child. - Oh, yeah. - That's true. - No, that I never really, never really did. - Oh, I'm TV back in the data. - Yeah. - The one way they were in the jungle, and if I was some, I'd survive. - I'm a survivor. - I'm a survivor. I'm a no-get. - Okay, so what about you? What's your mind? - Mine, for some reason, I still remember it's comedy-electra back in the day. - That was just like, I don't know what I was doing on the internet. - We just remember this one. - Oh, we could guess. - Yeah, but at that point, I don't remember having a computer in the house. I just remember this particular video of her pouring milk on herself. - Wow. - Wow. - I was like, what? 13, maybe 40? I can't remember. - Wow. - I don't remember what age I was. - I just remember, I just have the image of the video in my head. - Mm-hmm. - And then like, yeah. - And then when I watched "The Last Dance," right there, the Michael Jordan documentary on Netflix. - That's recent. - Yeah, recent. - So I remember that, and I forgot for a long time. - Uh-huh. - And I watched that, and then I... - Then there was an episode on Dennis Rodman, where he was dating, come like, try it out. - Uh-huh. - Yo, this dude is like fucking leaving the life. - I went there when I was a teen. - Didn't Carmen break his dick or something? - I have no idea. I don't know all these stories. - Yeah, I think Dennis Rodman broke his dick before. - Wow. - And I think Carmen was the one that broke it. - Wow. - I think so. Okay, I might be... - I might be... - Don't Kim Jong-un. - Talking... - But it wasn't that big era of, like, the... what I would call it, that era was the influences. - Yeah. - Like the hot girl influences. - Yeah. - So it was like, Carmen was Paris Hilton in fucking Tehran. - Yeah. - Like that kind of era. But Carmen was my favorite. They remember. - Yeah. - Trish Stratus. - Oh, yeah, I mean Trish Lita. - Yeah, yeah. - Yeah. - What's interesting? - It's a dead era of... - Tory Stacey Kubler. - I don't think... - Yeah. - So those were the eras, like, where you were as a puberty kid. - So as a puberty kid, who was your... - I really like Hannah Montana. - Oh, I don't have Victoria Justice from Victorious. - I got the best of both worlds. - You got the best of both. - You got, okay. - Yeah. - Coming up with the show. - Well, I mean, I spent a lot of my time watching Nickelodeon this new channel. - Mm-hmm, right. - So, whatever girl that was on there, I would find a track. - Demi Lovato. - Of Vanessa Hudgens. - Vanessa Hudgens. - Back in the day, for Oscar Musikul, of Pete. - Really? - Yeah, Vanessa Hudgens went... - High school musical one and two? Oh, my gosh. - Yeah. - She was the, like, eighth girl. - The eighth girl. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Okay. - So... - Yeah. - Who's the girl you did as you did as you did as a dude? - The cartoon man? - Teenage Mutant Ninja Tater. - No, no, no, no, no. - April. - The cartoon girl. - The cartoon girl. - The cartoon girl? - Yeah. - I don't know about our mutual friends. I know, and I feel like you guys would know who he is the moment I tell you the story. - Okay. - He told me he got his first boner when he saw Nala from the liking. - No, no, no, no, no. - Not fine, though. - I know what he's saying. - No, no, no, no, no. - He don't have to say his name, but... - No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'll try that. Okay. Is he... - Definitely a brown guy. - Definitely a brown guy. - Definitely a brown guy. - It's only exclusive. Nala is brown, brown hotness. - Just fine. Like, it's the grown-up Nala, right? The one way they were, like, caressing each other. - Nala, when Nala was of legal, it's like, yeah. - Yes, when the cartoon was legally fuckable, that's right. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - That Nala. - Fine. - Yeah, you don't know who this guy is like. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Our most famous friend, okay? - You don't want to hear your heart? - Ariel. - I thought it was weird that she has a wish still. - Oh. - You know what I mean, like... - I'm like, what? - You're not human. That's the whole thing, right? - Yeah. - What if we're brown? You know what I mean? - I like it. - I was thinking that as a kid. I wasn't covering it, you know, what the... - I thought... - Fish not wearing anything. - Aladdin? Aladdin and Jasmine. - What kind of, like, that kind of love, I was like, uh, low-key. I wanted to be Aladdin. - Oh, man. - That love I wanted was Troy and Gabriela. - Right. - You still do, right? - I still do that. - You're still, you're all about high school. - I fucking love it, bro. That's still my favorite movie of all time. - You pop with your passion, uh, one, two, three. - My favorite high school musical song is "I Don't Dance." - Oh, my God. - Oh, my God. That's by... - Carbon Blue. - Carbon Blue. - Carbon Blue. - Wait, what's the one where he was, like, seeking? - Yeah. - It's bad on it. - Yeah. - Bad on it? - Yeah. - But "I Don't Dance" is my favorite because he is dancing the fuck out of that song. - I told Jackie, I was like three, he has four songs that I'll play in my wedding. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Shit. Four songs that I'll play. All four will be in my wedding. - Okay. - When I walk out, when I'm dancing with my wife for the first time, they'll walk away. And then one is just a general vibe. - Yeah. - Right. - And I think that... - You know, just for you, I don't like singing and dancing, but at your wedding, I would like to do bad on it by myself. - Do it, bro. I'll say it. - No, but I do the hip hop is my passion part for a status quo. - No, I'm not doing a status quo. - Yeah. - Why not? - Because I'm talking about... I'm talking about three. - Oh, three. You don't want to do status quo. - Yeah. - Because I want to sing that part. - Oh, no. I just want to do a display as the wedding is going on in general, but I'm talking when I'm walking out like the major things are going to be... - Well, if that's the case, then I can't do bad on it. I would do a scream. - Okay. - No, no. - Wait, you all know these songs? - Yeah. - Yeah. - So, I was like three in cinemas. - Yeah. - I already memorized the song before I went into the cinema. - Yeah. - I was like... - Yeah. - I was crazy about it. - Damn. - I'm still on... I'm still on HSM TikTok now. - You should host a high-school musical podcast. - I think you... - Yeah. - They don't break any... Okay, high-school musical... There's one, two, three. There's the musical, the series. - Yeah. - And then there's the Malaysia song of the high-school musical. - Exactly. There's a whole speaking song. There's a... It's a high-school musical one and two. Or maybe, I think, two more exclusively. Southeast Asia, like every country has their own one song. - Right. - So like, "Bad on It" was... - It's not... - It's Asia. "Bad on It" was Taiwanese. Like, there was a Taiwanese version of "Bad on It." - Shit. - Yeah. - So like, every song has one different country doing... - Yeah, and there's high-school musical, the musical, the series, on this new plus. - Yeah. Damn. - With Olivier Rodrigo. - That's how she got famous. - That's a whole fucking universe on this show. - Yeah. - As expensive as the R universe. - R universe. - R boys' universe. - Yeah. - We're like, "You're one of those guys too." - One of them. - Crazy. Today I saw a bakery called R Bakery. And I was like, "Is it part of the universe?" - R Bakery? - No, it's two. - Yeah, it's two, yeah. - R Bakery. - R Bakery. - R Bakery. - R Bakery. - R Bakery. - R Bakery. - R Bakery. - R Bakery. - Okay, next question. - Last question. - Last question. - Rohan113011 asks, "If y'all had to choose one comedian to be stranded on an island with, who would it be?" - I do not want to be stranded on an island with a comedian. Both of us are useless. Honestly, I think Jason would be a pretty okay. - Wait, any comedian? - Any comedian. - Any part of the world. - Any part of the world, okay. - Yeah. - Then I want to like an outdoorsy comedian. - Oh, right. - Who has like, jungle skills. - Like the machine. - Nola. - Nah. - Yeah. - Rogan, yeah. - Rogan. - Rogan. - Rogan. - You fucking can do archery fishing. - Yeah, yeah. - Rogan will have all the knowledge that these fishes are not supposed to be consumable. But if you take out the mid-flash, that's what the poison is, and now you get lost. - And he's like comfortable with like gutting animals and shit. - Yeah. - Like he can do it. - Yeah. - Then Rogan is probably the best one to do it with. - Yeah. - But stuck on an island, you got to think about survival issues. - Oh, if you're like, maybe a female coming, if, you know. - Why? - Why? - You don't be, like, I'm just saying, like, you know what I'm talking about. - Who is it? - Consensually, la, that's what I mean. - It's about survival. - Yeah, but you're going to be stuck there. - Bro, survive. Like, you have to build a house. - What's the vibe? - How do I see people? - I think it's more about surviving, right? - Yeah, fair. - Like, I don't, like, do you think you would enjoy your time on, on the island living with Joe Rogan for the rest of your life? - You know what I mean? - What life? - What, like, is that even surviving? - No, you know what I mean? You're stuck on the island, just somebody saves you. - Is that okay? - Read the question? - If you had to choose one comedian to be stranded on an island with. - Okay, stranded. So it's like, maybe, like... - It's either you stay there forever, or until someone saves you again. I think if you broke it, you would, like, fucking build a boat and then you can fucking go all the way somewhere. - Yeah, story about the six boys that escaped the Catholic school and then they swam out and then they got stranded on an island and then they were left there for, like, a year or two years or something and they had to survive. And then, like, a voyager reached there and they found them. - Was it Catholic? I thought it was, like, the Thai football team. - No, it wasn't. That was a kid. - So it was a bunch of Catholic boys, then they got stuck there. Like, they broke or some shit that they got stuck there. One of them broke their leg. And then, after that, they had to, like, you know... - First aid. - First aid, he got his own. Then they killed birds and they cooked birds. Then they built houses and shit. They started planting somebody. They had a whole, like, they survived by themselves. These six boys. Right, they made musical instruments and shit. - Nice. - I don't think that was important. - Yeah, but they made musical instruments. So, like, Polynesia-type boys. - I think it is important for survival. Like, after a certain point of time, like, if you have secure your food and have to keep, then you gotta make sure your mental health is okay. - Yeah. - No, you know, you go crazy. - Yeah. - And then you make a ball and then it becomes your friend. - So, like, those six boys, right? They spend years on that island. I think, like, this white guy comes in and they're like, "Oh, shit. These guys are the boys that were lost." But the question is, like, why do they want the island? Do you think, like, because he's a boy who's going through puberty. Do you think, like, they're like, "Yo, yeah, maybe hit me out with somebody?" - I don't judge. At that point, that's... - Yeah. - The island is all the people you know. - Yeah, but also, like, you see, when you think about it, when you were in BMT, did you jerk off? - Uh, no. - Definitely not. I wasn't allowed to. - I mean, I mean, like, when I was surrounded by all those guys, I didn't feel the urge to, you know? - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - So, I don't think they wouldn't... - Yeah. - Yeah. But the remarkable story is one of them that, like, broke their leg and then they healed, you know, after a long time. - That's because they're Catholics. - First aid. - They probably prayed a lot. - The guy could walk again, like, properly, like, use his leg properly after that. - Catholic Polynesians? - I don't know. - I'm sure there is every combination of everything. - Dude, you are not somewhere over the rainbow looking dudes, okay? - Yeah. - What? - What does that mean? - What does that mean? - It's a... - It's a... - Well, but no, not fat. - You can leave the people. - Okay, but skinnier. - You get me... - Oh, that's good, people. - Like, that kind. - Oh, like, Hawaii? - They were in Tonggan. - Tonggan, yeah. - Yeah, secret. Tonggan is like... - All right. - Like, I... - Hello, island. - Is it six boys? - Right? Who found them? - White guy, right? - Tonggan. - Some white guy, right? - And the white guy just kept them? - Let's see, let's kill their blood. - Relax! What the fuck? - Let's kill, let's kill. - That was... - That was feedback. - So loud, we heard it twice. - Yeah. - Wow. - Yeah, I'm just... - Keep them. - I'm just curious. I'm asking, like, did he keep them? Did he release them? - He bought. - Yeah. - He found them and his finest keepers, you know? - Yeah. - Isn't that the rule of the jungle? - Oh, no, no, no. - The rule of the jungle. But yeah, they found everything, they had a whole house by themselves. - So who is... - Do you want to leave? That's your house. You already built, you know what I mean? - So who are you going to be stranded on an island with? - Jorogan. - Jorogan. - I'm not going to go with Rogen. - I'm not going with Rogen. - I'm going with Rogen all day. - I think I'm going to go with... - Can I record? - I'm sorry. I want to pick you up, sorry. - Me. - You got a friend, man. - Sure, yeah. - A friend, a mental health friend. - Rogen, you got to get to know him. - I feel like I know Rogen because I've been listening since I was like 70. - I feel like Holland might be a good choice, honestly. - How about you? - Holland can just... - And then his bird will come. - Have you seen this guy? They took a TikTok of him? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Colin. He's our friend. - When you listen, if you see a video of a guy with a crow that's on his shoulder or like walking with him, that is Colin. - That's our boy. - That's our boy. He tamed the crow. He didn't tamed the crow. - He razed it. - He razed it. - That's his child, dude. - He messaged us when he got the fucking crow egg and then he showed us the baby and we technically... - Wait, baby. - So he got it from a baby? - Yeah. - He got it when... - Colin is his mum. - Yeah. - Oh, right. I thought he saved it when he was like... - No. Like, then old man gave him the egg and then Colin just has been looking after the baby. - Don't piss off Colin. He would fucking send that crow for you. - Literally, dude. - Crows are smart. They know revenge and shit. - Yeah. - Shit. All right, man. On that light hearted note. - Yeah. - Let's have him on and bring the crow out. - Yeah, we'll crow. Okay, ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much for listening to this podcast. We'll come through next episode with me, maybe a lot better. - We're fine. - Yeah, but in the meantime, I thank you so much for staying with me. You know, it's just a nice little catch up for this week, right? - What the fuck? Is that the crow sound? - The crow sound. - That crow sound. - I'm pretty sure that's a slur. - The crow sound. - See, they don't say that, right? - No. - It's car. Not car. - Car. - Car. - See, ah, ah. See, there we are at the back. That's the... - Colin is many of these birds mother. - Yeah. - I've seen the bird get so excited when, like, Colin turns the corner and the bird's just like, "Ah, like, what'd I eat like?" - Yeah. - He's calling like the baby bird feed him. - No. - Dude, I want to go visit Colin. - Colin just chop sticks to feet. - Dude, the fucking bird is on his shoulder when he walks. - Yeah. - Okay. Anyways, guys, we'll be back next week. A lot better, a lot healthier. Thank you so much for staying. - Bye. - Yeah. I'll see you guys soon. - Love you. - Bye. (upbeat music) (singing) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (upbeat music) (applause) (audience applauds)
