The BIGG Successs Show
This Advice Is Not For The Faint-of-Heart!
How a common perception keeps many people from succeeding. Read the show summary at biggsuccess.com.
Welcome to The Big Success Show. Today, we offer some advice that is not for the faint of heart. The Big Success Show with George and Mary Lynn. Today we're going to talk about a common perception that keeps many people from succeeding and to illustrate our point, we have two stories. You know, Marilyn, I once had a student and he didn't perform well in my class at all. The main problem was he just went through periods of time where he just didn't attend. And I found out as a semester wound down that he had a problem with severe acne. And while the acne was under control, no problem. But whenever it would flare up, which happened occasionally, he just wouldn't leave his room. And had I known that this was the problem, we could have found all kinds of ways around it. If he had talked to someone at the university, there's just an immense amount of resources available. For whatever reason, he didn't take advantage of any of that. What are you, some kind of a jerk and people are afraid to reach out to you? Yes, I am, Mary Lynn. What's it to you? Well, but seriously, going back to this situation, I feel sorry for the guy. I can completely understand his reluctance to leave his room whenever he would have one of those flare-ups. But I am surprised that he didn't at least reach out to you and let you know what was going on. Well, and I was surprised too, Mary Lynn, but it made me wonder, why is it that some people who need help just don't ask for it? And I think in the case of your student here, there's some youth and an experience that went along with that. Maybe he didn't know any better. He'd never faced a situation like this before. And also considering the situation, I'm sure there was some insecurity about it too. Ah, Mary Lynn, the insecurity. You know, I think that if we move beyond this situation, I think you're hitting on what happens in a lot of cases. People just don't have the self-confidence to feel like they want to ask for help. I've worked with people who put on this air of confidence, but they would never ask for help because of their ego. They were too proud to admit that they were in over their head, and as a result, the project suffered, and boy, the finger point he began after that. Well, and people fall into this trap of thinking that asking for help makes them look weak. So let's look at our second story. I have a friend who's in business, and he's done very well. When I say very well, Mary Lynn, I mean multi-millionaire well. I'd say that's good. Not too bad, huh? He has multiple businesses. He owns a lot of real estate all over the country, travels extensively. He's a leader in the community, well respected, lives a good life. Well, a few years ago, he had some difficulties with one of his businesses, happened to be a franchise, and he went to anyone and everyone within the franchise organization that he thought could possibly help him with that situation. He asked for help, and he got it. They helped him find a solution that put him back on his feet, and his business took off. See what I love about the stories that he was smart enough to realize. He tried to come up with the answers, but couldn't, so he reached out to people who could help, and as a result, he succeeded. Absolutely, and so the moral to these stories is only the strong ask for help. And coming up, three tips to get the help you need. Today, we're talking about a common perception that it's a sign of weakness to ask for help, and we've demonstrated with two stories that it's actually quite the opposite. Only the strong ask for help. So now we'll share three tips on how to ask for the help that you need. First tip, know who to ask. Don't ask people who can't help you, but ask anyone and everyone who can help. And you often see Mary Lynn, people just broadcasting their problems. That doesn't work either, right? With my student, he may have talked to his friends, they don't know what to do, but he didn't talk to the people at the university that could have helped him. He didn't talk to me. My friend talked to the appropriate people with a franchise or, and they helped make it happen. Second tip, present your situation properly. Now, obviously, this is dependent on the situation, but whenever possible, frame it as an opportunity, not a problem, because people respond better to positive and opportunities. Absolutely right. You know, with my student, obviously, he doesn't have an opportunity per se to offer, but think about it this way. There are people at the university whose entire job is to help students in situations just like the one he was in. So by asking them for help, he's giving them the opportunity to fulfill their mission. With my friend, he presented an openness to consider anything, but a desire to help the people he was asking for help, help them solve problems too, and he ended up partnering with them and yet another business which really led to his fortune. And the third tip, you have to be willing to accept advice and act upon it, or you shouldn't ask in the first place. Because no one wants to feel like they're wasting time, right? Demonstrate that they've helped you by implementing the solution they suggested. Do you need help with a big challenge you're facing? We're here to help. Email us through our website at bigsuccess.com. That's also where we have a written summary of today's show, and let's get our big quote today. Our quote today comes from Rick O'Kasick, the lead singer for The Cars, who said, "refusing to ask for help when you need it is refusing someone the chance to be helpful." So, let's go and ask for help. I usually get just what I needed to shake it up and create some magic. You're all I've got tonight, Mary Lou. Hey, who's going to drive me home? I just had to throw one in there with a plethora of cars long from answering. Next time, we're going to answer a question from one of our newsletter subscribers. Speaking of big challenges. That's right. This is a big win, Mary Lynn. We'll just give you the title of the show. It's help. My spouse spends too much money. Did you send this one in? What we'll do is we'll talk about how to stop the bleeding without getting bloody. And I noticed you didn't answer it. Until then, here's to your big success. The big success show at B-I-G-G Success.com. [MUSIC]